Should i break up ?

[johnydones]

Hey guys , i was away for a month or two , and now im neck deep in s**t because i found myself in relationship with 2 girls and its getting out of control.

Im with girl No.1 for about three months and with girl No.2 for about a month. I did not set relationship expectations early and correctly and now they both think we are in serious relationship. Don't get me wrong, i am down for that but i don't think i can be with both of them now.

Girl No.1 is 23 years old , very loving person but a bit whacked in the head ,a bit childish, changes moods often , cries and causes a lot of drama. But she is madly in love and she said she loves me (too early after 3 months ?) She notices every single thing about me and senses almost everything that happens in my life and when something is troubling me. I am realizing that i am falling in love a bit too with this one. I reckon that if i stay with her it will be one of those relationships where we are always together and fighting all the time.

Girl No.2 is 26 years old , more serious, calm and causes no drama. Even though i see that she likes me very much , it's too early to expect any kind of emotions but she looks like someone who would rather bust your balls and indirectly tell you how she feels. I know that i enjoy her company and i can hang out with her more relaxed , joking not being afraid that she will take it too seriously.

I hope you understand why i am having second thoughts , they are two different worlds and i love being with both of them. Its nice when someone loves you and when you love someone but is it worth the drama every few days and not being able to relax and to think if you should make a joke.

What do you guys think , would you choose love and emotions crazy relationship over something more relaxed and having a bit more of a friend in your GF.

-JD

 

[Franco]

johny,

I realized your question is a bit vague here. Are you essentially asking us which girl you should be with? Or are you asking how to manage both of them? What exactly is your question?

- Franco

 

[johnydones]

Hey Franco, Thanks for bringing it to my attention ,

Im asking is it possible to manage both of them now that they are used to us seeing each other every other day. I never had good response in past out of "hey , i think we should see each other less often" (not like that but the message is clear).

I am also having a bit of conscience issues , seeing how first girl is in love and all and the second girl is on her way to that as well.
I did not sleep quite well last week because of that ,and tonight girl No.2 is sleeping over at my place while girl No.1 is staying at her friends place like 1 minute away from my appartment, i told her im not in town for the night. No need to tell you how much stress it's causing me.

In your opinion , do you think i should break up with one of them , and that brings the other question if so, which one , because im lost here , i like both of them for the reasons i listed in my last post.

Thanks!

-JD

 

[Franco]

johny,

In your opinion , do you think i should break up with one of them , and that brings the other question if so, which one , because im lost here , i like both of them for the reasons i listed in my last post.

Well, this is a difficult question to answer because it all depends on what you want. If you want to keep both of them for around as long as possible, then you can certainly do that, but know that this could eventually blow up in your face in one regard or another, especially since you said one of the girls lives only 1 minute away (which is pretty dangerous if you're trying to hide the fact that you're sleeping with other women from her). In general, I try to avoid regularly seeing any girl that is within walking distance of my apartment. The situation you want to avoid is knowing that you could have had one of them as a girlfriend but then sent them both into some form of auto-rejection by trying to manipulate their schedules and make them believe that you were seeing each of them exclusively.

If you feel like both of them are girlfriend material and you want a girlfriend at this point in time, then again, it depends on your preference. Some guys might prefer the crazier emotions of a younger girl who causes drama, and some guys might prefer a more relaxed girl that doesn't take things too seriously and can be joked around with.

If you want my personal opinion, then girl number 2 sounds like a better girlfriend prospect. As a matter of fact, my current girlfriend is 26 and has a personality that is exactly like the one you described with girl number 2. We rarely have any drama, and most of the time she's over, we just enjoy sex together while doing things like cooking, watching movies, or playing video games. Occasionally we'll also go out to night clubs or pool parties to drink and dance as well.

Again, it just depends on what you want. If you feel like both girls meet your requirements on the physical attraction scale for being a girlfriend, then you just need to choose the one that you think will provide you with the most happiness.

- Franco

 

[johnydones]

Thanks Franco,

Yes , i love when you can be yourself around a girl and act like she is your friend above everything else , go out together and generally have fun like your would with your friends. She also started to be a bit more emotional , before that she was acting like "im cool , im not falling in love"
Girl No.1 does not live 2 minutes away , she was just at her friends place for the night, she lives in different town to be precise. I will try to gradually lower the number of times we see each other due to my work (which is true somewhat) and if she is not satisfied with that i will break up, i don't want to hurt or neglect her.

So thanks for your advise , i will take a week or two and decide what to do .

-JD

 

[Franco]

Girl No.1 does not live 2 minutes away , she was just at her friends place for the night, she lives in different town to be precise.

Ah, sorry, I misread this. Although this is a good thing. =)

It sounds like you know what you need to do now, so everything should work out.

- Franco