Should I just go all in?

[Mr.Rob]

My suggestion would be to invest whatever you can into learning a remote skill that you can market online; and then get out of wherever you are and live abroad for a while. It seems like you really need some distance from your current environment to get some perspective on your life and what you really want.

+1

I live with my parents right now due to unfortunate circumstances and this is my current strategy. Learning digital marketing SEO skills at the moment.

 

[Sub-Zero]

I never thought of girls as being an important skill to me when I was younger, it was more of a hobby, I never felt that getting women should be put above anything, but now I realize that if you wanna get good, u can't be like other men and get girls through social circle, you gotta go hard and keep going like you're learning a real skill.

I never had a good job, always had money, but had to spend it all when I couldn't find work. I quit those jobs before I cursed someone out.

Yes when I say all in, I meant treat as a skill, I didn't mean to make it my main goal. Tbh I don't think you can really go 100% all in with women unless you're not doing anything.

Even in college, you still have to do school work, still have to go to class, do hw, or even work part time. And I'm sure those are bigger focuses to them than women, well some.

And I stayed away from dating because I am insecure about my financial situation, more so I can't even get a basic job and felt that I should not date.

But it's been like that for years and I'm tired and I have a lot pent up that I want to put all over women.

So I'm thinking I might as well go hard with women until I get a job, because what else can I do?

I really wanna get better with girls to move on and focus on other things.

But yeah women are not my prorotiy, but I want to put time in and fuck these hoes like I'm supposed to while I continue the job search.

Just didn't feel good about not having it together, but it's been years and people still haven't called me for a job.

Thing is hear me out man,

I've been putting women on the back burner forever, even without doing it intentionally. I found the site about half a decade ago and I've been using it, but I never made it serious like I was suppose to because I never thought of women nothing more than a hobby.

So the past few years I have been with a chick and have been focusing on getting a better job, years man. I have barely went out or did anything, just imagine you finding this site and putting girls on the back burner for years

So here I am now where I'm at the same position where I been. But now I'm saying fuck it I've put getting women on the back burner for enough years and still haven't gotten anywhere with either.

Money is still my main priority, but now I'm at the point where I want to ramp up my skills with women instead of letting time pass by and I get older and more unconfident in my self.

The older you get without having your shit together makes it 10x harder to date. Now I feel bad, but getting older will make it worse trying to learn this as a skill.

Plus I'm not young like u I'm a older younger dude.

So basically I have been putting getting better with women off for years already, I'm just saying now I want to put in the work I should have been doing plus put in the work to get more money.

Basically I'm saying is that I'm going to go hard on both now because I have been putting women off from too long and I'm tired of it, I feel so bad I actually let time pass with all of this great information in my hands, and I've had this information for so long and I barely got better, I want to get so goof with this stuff so I can help others out as well with women.

I hear ya SZ idk what to tell you about your past and the time you've "wasted." I don't know why you chose not to focus on this back then as a skill set. I imagine it was out of fear or feeling not good enough since 99.9% of guys are in the same boat. I found this information a while ago too and had many opportunities in college to really dedicate myself to this, but didn't out of fear and a lack of discipline. I still have immense approach anxiety and can't really approach by myself, but I have used this website to better other aspects of myself like general social calibration, fundamentals, and navigating the social arena.

I have definitely felt that time is being wasted and I'm getting older and should have started learning this seriously years ago but oh well gotta live with it now. And not sure how old you are but I'm about to turn 26 I graduated college really late and feel like I'm a bit "behind" so to speak. The things is everything you say seems to point back to the same core issue: money.

You stated that you don't feel confident enough or that you don't deserve to get girls because of your circumstances and that you feel guilt for wanting to focus on girls when you could be focusing on your career instead. Ok understandable I'm pretty sure most dudes feel the same way who doesn't want to make a lot of money AND bone a lot of chicks too at the same time? Then when suggested you just chat up women throughout the day as a way to integrate it into your life more smoothly you said your town sucks because it's small and you can't move because you don't have the funds... You see what I mean?

From an outside perspective getting that handled would allow you to knock out several birds with one stone: you'll have your own pad and logistics will be better, you'll be able to afford to go out more often and spend money on social stuff, and most important I suspect you'd get a HUGE boost in confidence for feeling like a man who is able to support himself and have independence which will definitely come across in your vibe.

There's still a lot I don't understand about your situation too. Were you making enough money to live on your own before you quit your job and spent all your savings? You said you had to quit... what happened there?

The reason I suggest you focus on money is because your question was what to go all in on. "All in" to me means making that thing your obsession and channeling all of your focus and attention into it. Based on everything you've described the logical answer would be your financial situation. If your question was "how can I integrate meeting girls into a life that prioritizes money and career success?" then I'd give you a different suggestion.

 

[Sub-Zero]

What skills you recommend and how long would it take to get somewhere decent to be able to make some moves ?

I know some skills have been mentioned here, but maybe you know a few more.

I'm a black dude also, think it's safe to be all over in other countries alone ?

Idk, sounds fun, but idk.


Do you have any advice on how I shouldn't feel insecure because of my financial situation while dating women ?

Subzero -

My suggestion would be to invest whatever you can into learning a remote skill that you can market online; and then get out of wherever you are and live abroad for a while. It seems like you really need some distance from your current environment to get some perspective on your life and what you really want.

But, you can also live abroad very cheaply, and get the girls lifestyle you desire.

Another idea: Although they don't pay well with shitty-ish hours, you can go teach English for a year abroad - that'll give you some space, and a living wage, and most likely the opportunity to meet lots of women, including fellow travelers. I would not do this for longer than one year, though - it would be strictly to get out and find a new path...some self discovery.

But mostly, I think you need to really get out of your parents house. That's no-bueno - a person has a totally different drive when they have to be self sufficient (even moreso when they have to support a family), and that's a really good thing.

 

[Space]

I do have to have some time for women, I guess a couple of days of the week wouldn't be too much.

Okay, I just honestly don't quite get allocating that much time wouldn't be enough for what.

What u mean?

Okay, my native language isn't English, but in these situations it usually helps if another person who understands my English differently and thinks he got what I meant re-phrases it to you in his different terms. Maybe we can try that.