Should Men Give Olive Branches To Women?

[Troy]

When I was a boy, I was always taught to give without expecting in return. And 95% + of the time, I would adhere to this rule. The only times I typically would deviate in the past is if I gave someone something, and they outright went to disrespect me immediately there after.

Im going to discuss this situation with Aurora one last time. As I think it is a very important lesson. And one that I will ensure I never end up in again.

I have spent the entire week thinking about what guys like Skills, Teevster, Vision, Chase and a few other guys said. So I will summarize what I gather:

- Never ask back for something you give as a gift
- Dont give women money unless its a woman who has your child
- It came across as I was being cheap and petty

The main reason I am writing this post, is because I am a man of HIGH accountability. When I realize I have made a mistake, I do my best to be 100% accountable for those mistakes. And I make an attempt to fix the mistakes.

I do plan on becoming a full time entrepreneur one day and to do that, I need to be a great leader first and foremost. Great leaders lead by example. And if I am ever going to expect my future staff to do XYZ thing, I need to be that guy. If I am ever going to have a long term relationship with a woman, I need to lead her. If I expect my future children to do XYZ thing, I need to be that guy. And I need to lead by example and set standards.

A few guys had pointed out that this Aurora chick was toxic as hell and I dodged a bullet. And I can definitely see where that is true now.

But here is the #1 point in this entire post: I would like to 100% be accountable for the mistakes I made, and offer an olive branch. Not because I expect anything from this woman. But I think it would be a good headstart going into the future. I happily will pay for my mistakes.

P.s. The only reason I took action was the level of disrespect. Getting flaked on, then being blocked immediately there after. But I want to make it right within for me.

Before I decided to write this post, I checked out quite a few articles on GirlsChase:

Tactics Tuesdays: Giving Gifts and Offering Compliance

You can sometimes do things for girls to make them more compliant. But you must be strategic in this – and you absolutely can’t supplicate. Note right up front: this post is for somewhat more advanced guys. At least intermediate-on-up. You need to be fine saying no to girls and not have an...

www.girlschase.com

You Don't Get Girlfriends by "Giving Them Stuff"

Can you convince a girl to be your girlfriend by giving her stuff? It's obviously not a strategy we recommend on this site. But LOTS of guys try to pull it off. So let's have a look. A guy on Reddit talks about a girl who “let's just be friends”'d him six months ago, writing: Earlier this week...

www.girlschase.com

Are You Giving Her Sex or Trading for It?

In the article on using astrology with girls, 340Breeze had a solid comment with an interesting part that I’ll quote in part here (because it’s pretty long): “Ultimately my question is: when interacting with a woman on a FIRST ‘date’ what is the BEST step by step process where the interaction...

www.girlschase.com

Should You Apologize to Women?

"I'm sorry!" To me, these are the two words that define the '90s era boyfriend / husband on television situational comedies. I haven't watched television since 2002 (with the exception of the entire series of Lost, which I watched online over the space of a month after getting laid off from work...

www.girlschase.com

When You Concede, Don't Pander or Break

You can't win every fight. But how you handle the situations where you must back down a bit determines how those you're in the fight with treat you. Jimbo commented in my article on meeting girls while staying safe in a paranoid dating society, asking me to review a recent, controversial article...

www.girlschase.com

Reversing Poor Past Precedent with Girls You Like

Alex writes in with a question about a follow-up article to the one on precedent: “Dating and Relationship Precedent: Why It’s So Very Important.” Here's his email: “Hi Chase and friends at girlschase.com Your articles are amazing! I found Chase's article on precedent to be thought-provoking...

www.girlschase.com

Olive Branch Definition​

"something that is said or done to make peace or to show that you want peace : a symbol of peace."

This definition is from a quick Google search I did. I know not everyone is religious. But growing up, I went to Church every Sunday and I was taught about olive branches and making peace with others. One of the things I learnt as well was to make peace within. The other person does not even have to make peace with you. You just need to do it for yourself.

I really tried to find the answer on GirlsChase before I asked, but I did not find the exact answer to this.

Should I Offer An Olive Branch To This Flake Chick?​

Dating is different so I obviously cannot just take what I learnt as a boy and try to mix it in dating. Thats not how it goes. And depending on the situation, I may have to change some things within my mindset first. Growing up, I was taught to be a nice guy. So basically the entire reason I am even writing this is to find out if this is some nice guy, beta male, simp ass move?

If I go ahead to offer an olive branch, here is what I was thinking to do. Send this Aurora chick a final text saying something like:

"Hey I realize both of us made a few mistakes. And as a man, I want to be fully accountable. I just sent you the $25. It's yours to keep. What really triggered me was the fact I didn't hear back from you and I felt insulted. It was not because I was expecting like sex from you or anything like that. Thats not how I move. This is just me offering an olive branch of peace. And after this message, I have zero expectations to receive anything from you after this. Troy".

Ok writing this, it sounds like something a nice guy would do. But at the same time, it sounds like something a man with a good shoulder on his heads would do. What do you guys think?

To recap:

- This is not an attempt to get back in good graces with her. It is only to make peace within.
- This is not an attempt to get her attraction to get higher for me.
- Mentally I have already moved on. I would not date this girl. But I dont want to go around burning bridges with women. There are better ways to deal with things in life than burning bridges with people.

 

[topcat]

Bro, this is rumination.

The only articles you need to be reading are this

Nice People Need Hard Rules

I was talking to a friend last night who'd been railroaded by a cluster B girlfriend of his - a girl with borderline personality disorder (he hadn't realized until years in), which, if you're not familiar with it, is a real crazy-making personality profile that makes the affected individual...

www.girlschase.com

and this

How to Overcome Depression

Was discussing this on a forum with a guy; I used to talk about it a fair amount, some time back, but it's sort of faded from my life in significance. It just isn't on my mind much these days anymore, but I do remember how big a deal it was for me once, and hopefully my story and process can...

www.girlschase.com

"Hey I realize both of us made a few mistakes. And as a man, I want to be fully accountable. I just sent you the $25. It's yours to keep. What really triggered me was the fact I didn't hear back from you and I felt insulted. It was not because I was expecting like sex from you or anything like that. Thats not how I move. This is just me offering an olive branch of peace. And after this message, I have zero expectations to receive anything from you after this. Troy".

I don’t understand what you expect this to do for you? It’s going to look crazy as fuck from her perspective. Given money is something you value highly, and likely your job too, I wouldn’t go disturbing things further with coworkers by making them think you are unstable.

You need to learn to be an asshole. Or at least do your utmost to protect yourself from them.

Especially in your country, the weak get eaten.

 

[Rakehell]

Yeah she won’t respond to that. All you’d be doing is going deeper into the investment rabbit hole. She most likely doesn’t think about you 99% as much as you have been. She might’ve even laughed after your police stunt because it would’ve seemed so bizzare to her. This’ll only creep her out since you’re obviously still feeling strongly after reporting her.

Not trying to sound harsh but you have to consider the fact that you feel a lot more strongly about her than she does about you.

 

[Will_V]

When I was a boy, I was always taught to give without expecting in return. And 95% + of the time, I would adhere to this rule. The only times I typically would deviate in the past is if I gave someone something, and they outright went to disrespect me immediately there after.

Im going to discuss this situation with Aurora one last time. As I think it is a very important lesson. And one that I will ensure I never end up in again.

I have spent the entire week thinking about what guys like Skills, Teevster, Vision, Chase and a few other guys said. So I will summarize what I gather:

- Never ask back for something you give as a gift
- Dont give women money unless its a woman who has your child
- It came across as I was being cheap and petty

The main reason I am writing this post, is because I am a man of HIGH accountability. When I realize I have made a mistake, I do my best to be 100% accountable for those mistakes. And I make an attempt to fix the mistakes.

I do plan on becoming a full time entrepreneur one day and to do that, I need to be a great leader first and foremost. Great leaders lead by example. And if I am ever going to expect my future staff to do XYZ thing, I need to be that guy. If I am ever going to have a long term relationship with a woman, I need to lead her. If I expect my future children to do XYZ thing, I need to be that guy. And I need to lead by example and set standards.

A few guys had pointed out that this Aurora chick was toxic as hell and I dodged a bullet. And I can definitely see where that is true now.

But here is the #1 point in this entire post: I would like to 100% be accountable for the mistakes I made, and offer an olive branch. Not because I expect anything from this woman. But I think it would be a good headstart going into the future. I happily will pay for my mistakes.

P.s. The only reason I took action was the level of disrespect. Getting flaked on, then being blocked immediately there after. But I want to make it right within for me.

Before I decided to write this post, I checked out quite a few articles on GirlsChase:

Tactics Tuesdays: Giving Gifts and Offering Compliance

You can sometimes do things for girls to make them more compliant. But you must be strategic in this – and you absolutely can’t supplicate. Note right up front: this post is for somewhat more advanced guys. At least intermediate-on-up. You need to be fine saying no to girls and not have an...

www.girlschase.com

You Don't Get Girlfriends by "Giving Them Stuff"

Can you convince a girl to be your girlfriend by giving her stuff? It's obviously not a strategy we recommend on this site. But LOTS of guys try to pull it off. So let's have a look. A guy on Reddit talks about a girl who “let's just be friends”'d him six months ago, writing: Earlier this week...

www.girlschase.com

Are You Giving Her Sex or Trading for It?

In the article on using astrology with girls, 340Breeze had a solid comment with an interesting part that I’ll quote in part here (because it’s pretty long): “Ultimately my question is: when interacting with a woman on a FIRST ‘date’ what is the BEST step by step process where the interaction...

www.girlschase.com

Should You Apologize to Women?

"I'm sorry!" To me, these are the two words that define the '90s era boyfriend / husband on television situational comedies. I haven't watched television since 2002 (with the exception of the entire series of Lost, which I watched online over the space of a month after getting laid off from work...

www.girlschase.com

When You Concede, Don't Pander or Break

You can't win every fight. But how you handle the situations where you must back down a bit determines how those you're in the fight with treat you. Jimbo commented in my article on meeting girls while staying safe in a paranoid dating society, asking me to review a recent, controversial article...

www.girlschase.com

Reversing Poor Past Precedent with Girls You Like

Alex writes in with a question about a follow-up article to the one on precedent: “Dating and Relationship Precedent: Why It’s So Very Important.” Here's his email: “Hi Chase and friends at girlschase.com Your articles are amazing! I found Chase's article on precedent to be thought-provoking...

www.girlschase.com

Olive Branch Definition​

"something that is said or done to make peace or to show that you want peace : a symbol of peace."

This definition is from a quick Google search I did. I know not everyone is religious. But growing up, I went to Church every Sunday and I was taught about olive branches and making peace with others. One of the things I learnt as well was to make peace within. The other person does not even have to make peace with you. You just need to do it for yourself.

I really tried to find the answer on GirlsChase before I asked, but I did not find the exact answer to this.

Should I Offer An Olive Branch To This Flake Chick?​

Dating is different so I obviously cannot just take what I learnt as a boy and try to mix it in dating. Thats not how it goes. And depending on the situation, I may have to change some things within my mindset first. Growing up, I was taught to be a nice guy. So basically the entire reason I am even writing this is to find out if this is some nice guy, beta male, simp ass move?

If I go ahead to offer an olive branch, here is what I was thinking to do. Send this Aurora chick a final text saying something like:

"Hey I realize both of us made a few mistakes. And as a man, I want to be fully accountable. I just sent you the $25. It's yours to keep. What really triggered me was the fact I didn't hear back from you and I felt insulted. It was not because I was expecting like sex from you or anything like that. Thats not how I move. This is just me offering an olive branch of peace. And after this message, I have zero expectations to receive anything from you after this. Troy".

Ok writing this, it sounds like something a nice guy would do. But at the same time, it sounds like something a man with a good shoulder on his heads would do. What do you guys think?

To recap:

- This is not an attempt to get back in good graces with her. It is only to make peace within.
- This is not an attempt to get her attraction to get higher for me.
- Mentally I have already moved on. I would not date this girl. But I dont want to go around burning bridges with women. There are better ways to deal with things in life than burning bridges with people.

I know you want to set things right from your perspective. Maybe you feel embarrassed about going to the police about the money. Normally, I think setting things right is a good thing, even when it apparently threatens your 'value'.

But there's something else you have to think about. This is a girl you already put the squeeze on. She may be considering or have considered doing something back, and perhaps the only thing that stopped her was that everyone was saying you were right and she was wrong.

If you send a message saying that what you did was wrong and she was fine, that might be all she needs to start something back at you. Just because one set of authorities took your side doesn't mean it will happen again, especially after you weaken your position completely.

In my opinion the best way to move forward is to accept the lesson and do things right the next time. Think about how bad it made you feel to get reactive about things and feel embarrassed later, and use it to keep your emotions in check and your mind alert in future.

There will be plenty more opportunities with other women to do things the right way, and they will more than validate you in return. This woman is nothing more than trouble, she wasted her opportunity with you, and you owe her nothing at all.

 

[trashKENNUT]

There's something you can do.

 

[Troy]

Bro, this is rumination.

The only articles you need to be reading are this

Nice People Need Hard Rules

I was talking to a friend last night who'd been railroaded by a cluster B girlfriend of his - a girl with borderline personality disorder (he hadn't realized until years in), which, if you're not familiar with it, is a real crazy-making personality profile that makes the affected individual...

www.girlschase.com

and this

How to Overcome Depression

Was discussing this on a forum with a guy; I used to talk about it a fair amount, some time back, but it's sort of faded from my life in significance. It just isn't on my mind much these days anymore, but I do remember how big a deal it was for me once, and hopefully my story and process can...

www.girlschase.com

I don’t understand what you expect this to do for you? It’s going to look crazy as fuck from her perspective. Given money is something you value highly, and likely your job too, I wouldn’t go disturbing things further with coworkers by making them think you are unstable.

You need to learn to be an asshole. Or at least do your utmost to protect yourself from them.

Especially in your country, the weak get eaten.

I did not think about it like that. Very interesting! Yes I can see where at times I do come across as nice to women. I dont know why in the past when I attempted to be an asshole, even slightly, women responded to it like I was insulting them. Some even got angry at me and I lost them completely.

The article links you dropped, I read them yesterday. Now that I have completely calmed down and gotten over this chick, yes I agree with you Topcat that I need to start with these links. Respect my G!

Yeah she won’t respond to that. All you’d be doing is going deeper into the investment rabbit hole. She most likely doesn’t think about you 99% as much as you have been. She might’ve even laughed after your police stunt because it would’ve seemed so bizzare to her. This’ll only creep her out since you’re obviously still feeling strongly after reporting her.

Not trying to sound harsh but you have to consider the fact that you feel a lot more strongly about her than she does about you.

Yep she did laugh. In fact she was even laughing while the police were talking to her. And the police had to ask "is this a laughing matter?". She does not give a fuck about what she did. Now that I think about what you said, I think even me sending her that message, she would just block my number and leave me on seen.

Yeah nah, that would end up driving me crazy. Ok I am going to let it go.

I know you want to set things right from your perspective. Maybe you feel embarrassed about going to the police about the money. Normally, I think setting things right is a good thing, even when it apparently threatens your 'value'.

But there's something else you have to think about. This is a girl you already put the squeeze on. She may be considering or have considered doing something back, and perhaps the only thing that stopped her was that everyone was saying you were right and she was wrong.

If you send a message saying that what you did was wrong and she was fine, that might be all she needs to start something back at you. Just because one set of authorities took your side doesn't mean it will happen again, especially after you weaken your position completely.

In my opinion the best way to move forward is to accept the lesson and do things right the next time. Think about how bad it made you feel to get reactive about things and feel embarrassed later, and use it to keep your emotions in check and your mind alert in future.

There will be plenty more opportunities with other women to do things the right way, and they will more than validate you in return. This woman is nothing more than trouble, she wasted her opportunity with you, and you owe her nothing at all.

She did send a few messages treatening to take out a restraining order against me. I see what you are saying. She thought it was funny but she was 100% willing to cooperate with the police request and send the money back to me. Because she feared what it could do to her reputation.

There is a saying in my country "let sleeping dogs lie". I definitely would not want to escalate the matter further and end up being ostracized or be legally treatened. And I have heard of stories of men getting the short end of the stick, even when they seemed to be in the right.

So yeah, I am going to let this go. I just Googled that there are 3.905 billion women in the world. Im a not let 1 woman cause me no more stress. Let sleeping dogs lie.

There's something you can do.

LOL not the WWE DWL @ZacAdam you play around too much. Very funny lol

Edit:

@Vision

Dude, just leave her alone and move on with your life.

Find some new girls.

Yep, I have not messaged her since her last Whatsapp message on Tuesday February 15. I also deleted her number and entire text conversation same day too. I asked this question to ensure I did not make things any worse and yep I am listening to what you guys said. Its a brand new week and I am already over her.

P.s. Yesterday I was in town dressed for a photoshoot and I already had 2 way hotter chicks checking me out. One even approached and gave me direct chosing signals

Troy

 

[Rakehell]

In my opinion extending the olive branch is something like a watered down apology. Apologies should only come from a place of strength, compassion, and authority. You never wanna apologize for your action especially if it came from a place of reactiveness in the moment.

Apologies are for someone you’ve hurt in which you didn’t want to hurt. And when you say sorry you dont say sorry for what you did, you apologize for how it made them feel because you never wanted that.

 

[trashKENNUT]

LOL not the WWE DWL @ZacAdam you play around too much. Very funny lol

This is to all Girlschase members. I'm joking a large part in the comments.
But this post might help.

...

Girls actually love violence. There is a large part of their psychosis (if that is the right word), that really revels in it.

Here is a quick story that might help:

A Part of being a virtuous men is controlling 14 year old girls who can't control themselves.
And this is very evident when I and a group of others were trainers in an event. And we manage this group of people twice every week for 3-4 months.

So... Naturally, there is a lot of interactions between trainers and trainees.

I had this girls being really physically violent to me. The reason that they do that is because i was teasing a little too much. Thus it is intepreted as "love".

You see.

As a young female, and this is backed up by science, there is a transition between the love for the teddy bear and then an actual male.

12-15 is where she sheds love for the teddy bear to loving an actual male at 16. And this gap can extend to even adulthood.

This transition varies though. Every female has their own threshold. And when she is still growing, this is erratic. Super erratic. She doesn't know that she actually crashes both social norms and her own rules.

Now, this is where you will grow to become virtuous men.

Because this 12-15 year old females are crashing social norms and sometimes they will go to the ends to make sure that you like them.

You have to not say NO to them but also not engage with them in sexual activities because it does ACTUAL harm to her, as it is to you and the society as a whole. It is just not good.

This virtuous act is why men will always supercede women, forever, ever and ever. This act is why the lowest value of men in society, who is just a taxi driver, a plumber or an electrician... triumphs over the feminist, the woke, the social justice warriors.

Because the latter offer nothing to society.

Women are not Men.
And this virtuous acts is one of the big reasons why women are not men. They will never be Men. They will never be Men. They will never be Men.

Women are not Men.
They will never be Men.

And as the old saying of @Chase in an old article of his. This women have never met a "real" men.

But Zac, how do you handle persistent 'RULES CRASHING' females who are erratic regardless of age?

i actually have a solution.

 

[Vision]

Dude, just leave her alone and move on with your life.

Find some new girls.

 

[moom]

Bro you havent even slept with her, move on to the next chick

 

[Tim Iron]

You don't just want to MOVE ON!

 

[POB]

- Never ask back for something you give as a gift

Don't give gifts to women who you are not very serious with

- Dont give women money unless its a woman who has your child

Don't give money to women who you are not very serious with.
If you have already split, pay the minimum required by law and move on with your life

- It came across as I was being cheap and petty

Holding on to your money is about being honest with yourself and living in a smart way.
Remember: there's always gonna be a simp to rescue her and pay for her shit.

The main reason I am writing this post, is because I am a man of HIGH accountability. When I realize I have made a mistake, I do my best to be 100% accountable for those mistakes. And I make an attempt to fix the mistakes.

Quick tip: say "I'm sorry" and move on with your life. People make mistakes, nobody is perfect...just get over it.

And if I am ever going to expect my future staff to do XYZ thing, I need to be that guy.

Don't have a staff. Instead get independent partners who you don't have to babysit around and pay salary all the time.

P.s. The only reason I took action was the level of disrespect. Getting flaked on, then being blocked immediately there after. But I want to make it right within for me.

We get that you are butthurt. Don't be. Move on to the next woman.

Should I Offer An Olive Branch To This Flake Chick?

No

"Hey I realize both of us made a few mistakes. And as a man, I want to be fully accountable. I just sent you the $25. It's yours to keep. What really triggered me was the fact I didn't hear back from you and I felt insulted. It was not because I was expecting like sex from you or anything like that. Thats not how I move. This is just me offering an olive branch of peace. And after this message, I have zero expectations to receive anything from you after this. Troy".

Jesus, use that energy to go out and sarge!
Why are you wasting so much time on a chick who made it clear she doesn't want to be with you?

- This is not an attempt to get back in good graces with her. It is only to make peace within.

Make that peace on your own.
You are a man...no chick will ever understand the challenges you face every day just because you were born with a dick in a shitty woke era.
Honor, commitment and that sense of righteousness about the world are masculine traits. Chicks are not interested in any of it. In fact they can destroy it with simple tears. Never expect it from them and never expect them to appreciate it. That's definitely not how they operate.

There are better ways to deal with things in life than burning bridges with people.

For sure.
Except when it's the other half lighting the fire.

 

[Troy]

Don't give gifts to women who you are not very serious with

Got it. I will cut that out going forward.

Don't give money to women who you are not very serious with.
If you have already split, pay the minimum required by law and move on with your life

Got it.

Holding on to your money is about being honest with yourself and living in a smart way.
Remember: there's always gonna be a simp to rescue her and pay for her shit.

Yeah let the simps rescue her. I aint doing it.

Quick tip: say "I'm sorry" and move on with your life. People make mistakes, nobody is perfect...just get over it.

Got it.

We get that you are butthurt. Don't be. Move on to the next woman.

Got it. I believe time will heal my heart as I have in the past. Right now I am still feeling some kind of way. But I have felt worse for other women in the past. And when I look back now at some of those women I think to myself "why the hell did I ever feel that way? She aint even all that?" So all in all I will give myself time to heal from this.

Jesus, use that energy to go out and sarge!
Why are you wasting so much time on a chick who made it clear she doesn't want to be with you?

I will sarge on getting to money instead. To answer you question, I was considering the potential bad that could happen if she does go around spreading rumors at work. I am currently working from home, so if my employer decides to bring us back in office, I would hope she cools off by then.

She is in a different department from me, so that adds another level of security for my reputation. I have had at least 17 women at my current job (in the past 3 years) show direct interest in dating me. One woman even walked around the office claiming me as her husband lol.

So I definitely did not want this one chick to end up making an attempt to spoil my name. I hear you though. I am going to go out and sarge with women who want to sarge with me.

Make that peace on your own.
You are a man...no chick will ever understand the challenges you face every day just because you were born with a dick in a shitty woke era.
Honor, commitment and that sense of righteousness about the world are masculine traits. Chicks are not interested in any of it. In fact they can destroy it with simple tears. Never expect it from them and never expect them to appreciate it. That's definitely not how they operate.

I did not know that. Got it.

For sure.
Except when it's the other half lighting the fire.

Got it. Yep this chick lit the fire real hard. I cooked. She asked me to buy a specific Ice Cream and she knew I was planning things ahead of time. She did not even have the basic human decency to give a explanation why she had to flake. I totally would have understood if she had given a reason.

But she definitely lit the fire when she decided to block my number, ignore my calls, and give zero reason for the flake. (and I was in no way rude to her).

Ok got it. Im going to follow you advice POB. Much respect sir!