SirRobin’s Journal

[SirRobin]

Yesterday was Day #1 of my 14 day newbie challenge. First off I must declare myself committed, not only to this challenge but to my goal of a healthy and abundant sex life.

About yesterday; The town I am living in right now is waaaaaay smaller than NYC, which is where i’ve been living for a long time. Luckily its a college town, and has a lot of young people, and some very beautiful people, too. There is a coffee shop I’ve found where I’ve seen many attractive women of the age and type I’d like to attract, so thats place #1. The second place I scouted is actually a couple of places but there all connected, and people here call it “the complex”. It’s a combination of bars and the only nightclub in town. On a busy night, its packed with people, a lot of them are beautiful women. So thats place number 2.
I mentioned this is a college town, and campus is a big part of this town. There is a university center with food, places to sit and rest, and a big open field for study and enjoying the daytime. I’ll call the university center place 3 and the campus lawn 4. This town has a lot of bars, and breweries, and I have yet to explore them all, so thats still a bit of a work-in-progress, but what locals call “Downtown” is where most of the people flock to on the weekends, and its hardly a walk to get from one bar to the next. I’ll consider downtown my number 5. There’s also a local movie theater that plays old movies - which is something I personally love, so I’ll call that number 6.

1. Local fav Coffee Shop
2. The Complex
3. University Center
4. The Lawn
5. Downtown
6. Movie Theater

Today is Day #2, working on posture, and observation. Gotta say, I’m really excited by this challenge. I’ve been in a rut for the past year, and I’m determined to get myself out of it.

 

[SirRobin]

Day #2 of the Newbie Challenge

Yesterday, I went to the Coffee Shop, Downtown, and the Complex and worked on my posture, and walk. Since I’ve gone through acting and voice training, I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on both my posture and my voice. They always need constant work in the form of checking in. My posture almost always gets worse when I am sitting. I noticed that a few guys around town who had beautiful girls on their arms had good posture, but overall I think a lot of people dont have good posture at all. Honestly, this made me feel really good about myself when I would notice I had the best posture in the room, or on the block.

The first thing I noticed walking around while I made sure every box was ticked (chest out, chin parallel etc…) was that people were more likely to move out of my way. I also noticed that I walk too fast - something I got from living in NYC. Most guys I noticed with the kind of girls I want have an easier stride - no less powerful, but not necessarily fast. So, I started reminding myself to slow down a little. I also noticed that when I walk, I dont like to move much of my body, so I tried to get my shoulders involved more, and relax my body so it wasnt wound up so tight.

While I was sitting in the coffee shop, I people watched while I did a little work, and ending up making good eye contact with a cute girl. Didn’t say anything, but was very aware of my posture - thinking of being easy, but strongly supported and wide, rather than curled up. It’s hard for me to feel ok for taking up space. I want to stop being afraid to take up space.

Basically, things which I hadn’t noticed before on something I thought I did well already popped up and made themselves apparent, so I can start working on them now.

I ended up going out with a few old buddies of mine to the Complex later last night, and as much as I liked seeing them, I realized they weren‘t particularly conducive to my journey here. Neither of them like to talk to new people, or be in places that are really busy, so we avoided a lot of places I would have been excited to go and scope out. There was just a slight sense of negativity toward the scene that I was getting from them, and I ended up feeling pretty down at the the end of the night. I need to find some new friends who are going to be a part of this journey with me.

I’ve been reading a bunch of articles on the site, and feel like i’m back in school, but in a good way!

Today is Day #3 - Eye Contact. Going to go out solo tonight for this one. Also have some errands to run around town so I’ll practice wherever I go. My goal is to actually say hi to someone I make eye contact with.

till we meet again
-SirRobin

 

[SirRobin]

Yesterday was a bizarre day. I ended my nearly 3 year drought by sleeping with a hinge date.

So, I started out with my assignment of Eye Contact, and because I’m doing another style challenge, I went to clothing outlets around town to try on different looks. Making Eye Contact is something I already feel like I do well, but again, always needs constant work and repetition. The first thing I noticed was that it was easier to make eye contact with men - easier in the sense that they were usually looking out more than women, who were usually engrossed in something (Friends, phone, the floor). So many people are in there own worlds, or looking down as they go through life that it is really hard to make eye contact. I made eye contact with every cashier or store employee I came in to contact with, and held it until they looked away. I always smiled, and often nodded. Sometimes I said hello. Children were fun to make eye contact because they are purely curious, there’s not really any other emotion or tension. With guys, there’s always a slight tension, and I was always quick to dispel that tension with a nod or a hello. With women, I tried to hold the tension as long as I could, but most women looked away. A lot of women look up, which I always think has to do with my receding hairline - just negative thought I have to deal with. Some looked down, and many to the side.

After getting home from my errands, I was having lunch, and looking forward to going out that evening for some more eye contact work downtown and at the complex, when I checked my phone I saw that I had missed a message from my old high school girlfriend. We had scheduled a get together at the coffee shop, and I had missed it thinking it was scheduled for today, not yesterday. I had stood her up, essentially. I felt so awful. This is the girl who has sparked my whole interest in getting better, and improving my life because I had been so hung up on her after our break up. I feel like I fuck up with this girl constantly. My day was ruined, and I felt really awful and like I had to reach out to someone. Unfortunately, I knew my old high school buddies wouldn’t be much help because they were too close to the situation when we broke up, so I reached out to a girl I’ve gone on a couple dates with who I met from hinge. I talked about my issue, she listened, and after about 10 minutes we were talking about other things and I felt way better.

We ended up back at her place and had a great time. I thought this would solve a lot of my depression issues, but it didn’t. Thought it was good, but not great, and she had a good time, but I left feeling about the same as I did when I showed up. I’m just not that into her, I supposes is a part of it. Also, over these three dry years I’ve watched a lot of porn, and that doesn’t help. But, I am reading the easypeasymethod and quitting porn altogether.

Anyway, weird day. Today is Day 4, and I may have to do this one over two days since I have a lot on my plate today, and nothing much tomorrow.

 

[SirRobin]

Today is a repeat of Day 4 - yesterday I did nothing. Can’t let that happen again, even if I need a day of rest, I can still do just one thing for my self-improvement. Today will be better.

 

[SirRobin]

DAY #4 Complete! Starting The One Date System!

Day #4 turned out to be a three day task, but I feel really good about it. 2 days ago, my attempt at Day 4 didnt go very well - I only said hi to 3 girls. The first girl was an attractive, dark haired girl who when I said hi, she smiled at me and looked down as she walked past me. The second girl I saw from a ways off sitting outside of the smoothie shop I was heading to. We locked eyes and smiled at each other, but I went inside to order my smoothie. While it was being made, I went outside and said hi to her, and told her she was cute. We started talking and I asked her if I could join her, which she accepted. Pretty much as soon as I sat down, I realized she wasn’t as cute as I thought, and was a little too strange for me. She started showing me pictures of animal hoods she collected, and that turned me off. After a few minutes I told her I was meeting someone and had to go. I struggled with saying hi to anyone else I saw - granted it was extremely smokey out due to nearby fires, and hardly anyone was out that day. Didn’t see any attractive women in the bookstore, the coffee shop, or the grocery store. I ended up stopping at walmart before heading home, and said hi to a somewhat attractive girl there, but she didn’t acknowledge it. I thought she was looking at me, but I dont think she was.

Yesterday, I went to campus. It was great for a few reasons: 1. I couldn’t let myself get away with the excuse of “She’s not attractive enough”. There are tons of beautiful women on campus, many are exactly my type. 2. I paid for only an hour of parking - so I challenged myself to do 6 approaches in that time.

The first one was the hardest, as always. Took me a long time, but I finally said hi to a blond girl and complimented the colorful skirt she was wearing. She was cute but nothing special, and not really my type. I still felt so much better afterward. The second girl had headphones on, but I approached anyway and also asked her for the time. She was a cute redhead and much more my type. I don‘t know why, but I was surprised at how warm and kind every girl I approached was. The third girl was a gorgeous thin dirty blonde, definitely the kind I want to pull, and she had her face buried in her phone. I approached, said hi and also asked her the time. She was all smiles. The forth girl was dressed beautifully, had perfect breasts, cute floral pants and high heels - I said hi, complemented her pants and asked for directions to the music building. She didn’t know but looked it up on her phone and was very helpful. This girl was exactly my type - professional, hot, strong, thin in the waist but curvy in the hips and breasts, and a little shorter than me. 5th girl was inside the center, she was looking at me, I looked at her, and when I approached her, before I could say more than Hi she asked me where a bubble tea shop was in the center. I didn’t know but pointed her to where people were sitting. The 6th girl was right before I left, I only had five minutes of parking and saw her from afar in the parking lot. When I said hi, she looked embarrassed, and surprised, less warm than all the others. I said hi to a few others after that around town, but nothing I remember as well as those six on campus.

Critique: I almost always said something like “my phone is dead“ when asking for the time or directions. I shouldn’t have to justify this. Just ask/say what you mean. Gotta work on that. I also did not pay much attention to eye contact. I’m sure it was alright, but not great. Not elite the way I want it to be.

I am starting the One Date videos and the first video homework is pic 2 fundamentals. Eye contact is #1, and Slowing my movements down is #2.

Voice and posture are pretty good considering my acting training, but I am always working on every fundamental - especially style. The biggest one I want to improve on though is conversation skills.

Today is Day #5 which means say hi and ask how their day is going. I feel like this will actually be easier. Either way, I’m excited!

-SirRobin

 

[SirRobin]

DAY #5 Completed! Took 2 days

Okay the first day I tried this, I asked one girl how her day was going while walking to the coffee shop. She said fine and asked me how mine was going, but we were both walking opposite directions so it didn’t really feel like much of an interaction. When I got to the coffee shop, I saw a girl I’ve seen around town a lot but never said hi to. She was working on some art, which is what I usually work on at the coffee shop. I walked by her table, said hello and asked her about what she was working on. She was really eager to show me and tell me about it, and the conversation was pretty effortless. I asked if I could join her and she was enthusiastic about that, we talked about art, and the rings she was wearing, and eventually she asked for my number. I didn’t even have to ask - which is a first for me - she said she was meeting a friend, but was going to ask her if they could meet at the coffee shop. Eventually though she did have to go meet her friend. She asked if I was going to stay at the coffee shop to work, and that she might come back to sit with me. I told her I’d be around for another hour or so. She did not come back before I left the shop, but it was a great conversation.

I went home to get ready to go back out for the evening when my buddy texted me saying he had a really big fight with his lady friend and wanted to hang out. I agreed, but unfortunately this buddy is not a particularly good person to aid in what I am doing on here. Though I like seeing him, and hanging out, I never felt like I could just start talking to a girl without making him feel ignored. It was frustrating. We did go to a pool hall were there was an extremely gorgeous girl, and she came up to me to ask if she could feel my sweater - it was a fluffy sweater - so I let her feel it but I fucked up the interaction by being a little too snarky when she asked where I got it. I was trying to be flirty, but I think I was stressed about the situation with my friend and it when I said that I wasn’t going to tell her where I got it, it came out a little bitting. Oh well, there will always be another girl.

Yesterday though, I went back to campus and once again approached six girls in a little over an hour this time. The first one was the hardest, as always. I approached a cute girl sitting in a booth at the University Center and asked her how her day was going. She seemed warm but not that interested. Girl two was a girl sitting in a chair on the lawn, she didn’t smile whatsoever when I asked her how her day was, but said good. She had a very challenging look about her, though she was pretty talkative all things considered. Girl 3 was a cute athletic type wearing gym clothes sitting outside. I asked her how her day was going and how her workout went - she said she hadn’t started her work out yet. She also looked pretty challenging, and like she was amused by the interaction but not interested. Girl 4 was another girl sitting in the UC, very cute and a bit shy looking. When I asked her how her day was she lit up, said it was going well, but looked down dismissively after she answered. Girl 5 was outside on the walk back to the coffee shop. I complemented her on her outfit, and how well she was dressed. Girl 6 was back at the coffee shop, a cute brunette with great eye make up and a perfect body who I made eye contact with while she was at the counter. I asked her how her day was, and about what she got to eat. She was all smiles but I ended the interaction after we talked about her snack.

Overall, I felt like my reception was not as warm this time around. I thought this would be easier and it was not. As for my fundamental work, I do feel like I’m improving my walk, and slowing my movements down. Eye contact was good - but once again I couldn’t tell you any eye colors of the girls I interacted with, so I know it could be better. Going through One Date and learning about SAC which is cool. Gotta try pinging 3 girls with SAC.

Today is Day 6 - Half Off day. Looking forward to it!

-SirRobin

 

[SirRobin]

Day #6 Completed

Ok, my half off day was not wonderful, but I realized a few things. The first thing - It’s overwhelming to focus on too many things at once, and then everything suffers.

The first girl I approached was a hired gun at an open market in town - she was selling her art, which we talked about - she was investing in me because she wanted to sell her art obviously but its a good lesson on what it feels like when someone wants something from you. I could have flirted more, but all I tried to do was to hold eye contact, smile, and respond. It’s funny how much game crosses over with acting. These feel like acting exercises.

The second girl was actually two girls who I chatted with over lunch at a local brewery. I asked them for their opinion on the food which they felt wasn’t good. Once again, I tried to keep eye contact which I didn’t do well this time, and respond with literally anything. It was a short conversation.

The third girl was a girl I walked past on a bridge overlooking the water. I asked if she was from here, and we talked about what brought her to montana. I was aiming for a deep dive, but I misheard what she said and come off looking pretty stupid. I did hold eye contact, and smile, and kept the conversation going for a while. I introduced myself and got her name as well.

The second thing I realized on this day was that I could improve my listening skills. I tend to think I am an excellent listener - but I fell flat this time. I want to be a good conversationalist and that starts with listening well. The problem is, I can’t juggle all these things very well, yet. My walk is good, my movements are slower, my voice sounds good, all that is starting to come together. My eye contact is #1 right now - getting their eye color - and listening better to improve my conversation is #2.

I am working on me beginner triangle:
- Fundamentals: Hair is buzzed as short as possible (balding). Clothes are well fitting. Outfits put together to match my Intellectual Artist personality. In the gym 4 days a week. Slowing movements down, walking upright with some shoulder swagger, keeping my thighs apart.
- Tactics: Anytime I’m with a date or a girl I am interested in, I find a way to lightly touch her. Working on learning how to get investment, and move faster.
- Vibe/Attitude: Provide value by improving my conversation skills, treat people like they are my oldest friend.

Today is Day #7 which is direct opening with a complement. I’ve done this a couple times already, so I am looking forward to improving this one!

 

[SirRobin]

Day #7 Complete - new lessons learned on another odd day

Ok, my day 7 plan was to start at the coffee shop - I had left my ipad charger there yesterday and was hoping they would have it. They didn’t but told me they would call if they found it. I needed to charge my dead ipad if i wanted to work at the coffee shop, so instead I went to campus, which is nearby, to pick up a charger. While I was on campus, I wandered and struggled with the first approach as always. The first girl I ended up aproaching was a beautiful brunette sitting on a bench looking at her computer. She was wearing bright red pants, and I complimented on how effortlessly she was pulling them off. She reacted warmly, and we introduced ourselves - she had a playful, inviting and sexy look in her eye and I could have taken the conversation further - but I got cold feet and left quickly afterward. I want to get to the point where I can effortlessly say “Do you have a couple minutes to grab a bubble tea around the corner with me?” which she probably would have accepted, as the tea shop was only a few steps away from where we were.

The next girl I complimented was another pretty brunette who had unique and flashy braid/hair accessories. I told her how pretty they made her look and how impressive they were. I introduced myself, and she warmly told me her name, smiling at the compliment. Honestly, I could have thought of a better compliment about the braids - but we were both walking when I approached and I hadn’t made much of a plan. Fascinating how often I see women, notice something striking or worth complimenting, and then when it comes to the approach, my thoughts go blank. My sentences are no longer coherent. I need more experience talking to beautiful strangers.

The third girl was back at the coffee shop - they had found my charger! I returned to pick it up and did a little work, until another gorgeous brunette came in and sat near me (I have a thing for thin, brainy brunettes). She was wearing yoga clothes, too, which showed off how toned she was. The funny thing was that she had a cupcake. I approached and asked her if it was her birthday, but she said she just liked cupcakes. I introduced myself and we started chatting. I asked her what she was studying - she said she had just declared her major in accounting. I told her she was too pretty to be an accountant, which made her laugh, and I followed the high point with asking if I could join her for a minute. She politely told me she had a boyfriend. I smiled, nodded and told her I would see her around sometime.

This is where my day started to turn into a very odd day for me.

I dind’t try for approaching a 4th girl because I had already set up a hinge date for later that evening. I was planning on finding a good compliment for the date, at a good moment. The date did not go particularly well - We went on a hike outside of town, and it was obvious she was looking for very strong connection/similarity. She also looked way better in her pictures than in person, which is usual, but nonetheless underwhelming. Anytime I tried to introduce touch be it incidental or romantic, she made no response whatsoever. I made sure to keep excellent eye contact, but probably could have gone further. I’m not sure what she was looking for, but it was clear we weren’t connecting in the way she wanted. The whole date was very polite, but uninteresting. She was quite a bit older than me, and I think that makes a lot of difference in how we both approached this date. We parted politely, both knowing we wouldn’t see each other again.

I am not at the level where I can figure out 1. exactly what kind of/how deep of a connection a woman is looking for. 2. Inspire/build the attraction of a women who isn’t into me immediately.

And that’s okay. I know that’s okay because after the date, I went to a local speak easy and started talking to a girl who pretty much stared at me from the moment I sat down at the bar. She was with her sister, and I chatted up both of them, complimented both of them on various things - Their interest in certain shows and their style. As we ate, drank, and talked, I could tell the one girl — a dirty blond, thin and pretty — was getting more interested. She kept asking me questions. I playfully bantered. Then the sisters decided to head home, but before they left, I told the blond I’d love to see her again, and asked for her number which she gave me.

I left the bar a few minutes later and ran into my buddies, who i’ve mentioned on here before. They wanted to go back to the bar I was just at, so we went back together and sat and drank for a moment. That’s when I got a text from the pretty blond asking if I was still at that same bar.
I told her yes and she joined me a moment later. I told my buddies I had to see about a girl, and they understood. So I ended up on this date with a woman I had just met, much more attractive than my hinge date, and flirting with her for an hour before I suggested we go to a different bar (The jazz band at the speak easy was getting louder). As soon as we got outside and into the ally, I made out with her. Then took her to another quieter spot, where we made out some more. It was all building sexual tension but here’s the problem.

I live with my parents right now, and can’t take her back to my place. She said her place wasn’t possible, so I walked her back to her car, where we made out and got pretty close to having public sex - but I dind’t have a condom on me. They were in my own car blocks away. So it ended with smiles, heavy making out, and two horny people going home unsatisfied (honestly, good for her if she found someone else that night!)

It was a logistical nightmare - and I was underprepared. Lessons learned. Logistics are important. Have a go-to plan for when you meet someone new on the spot. Have a condom on you if you think you’re into public sex (which I totally am).

However, I felt so good about the fact that I pulled this girl using what I’ve learned. Even if I didn’t close, I consider this a sort of milestone. So day 7 completed.

Today is Day #8 - Approach 2 girls who are sitting down. I am going to do my best to go for the challenge of talking for five minutes before leaving or asking for a number.

Till we meet again
— SirRobin

 

[SirRobin]

Day #8 and #9 Complete - Things are getting tough

I got a bit thrown off course by this week, unfortunately. The first approach was a girl in the Coffee Shop who I had seen look over at me a number of times. I introduced myself, and asked her what she was working on. We sat for about an hour together and talked about her studies, art, music, a bunch of things. I asked her if she was hungry and she came with me to a local mexican spot nearby. She mentioned she liked Jazz music, so I asked if she wanted to come to jazz night at the speak easy, which she agreed to.

The Second girl was at a local dive bar. I was waiting to go out with my buddies, so I decided to kill sometime at the bar. There was one attractive girl sitting by herself at the end, so I asked her if the seat was taken. When I started talking to her, asking her what she was up to, she said she was also waiting for her friends. She mentioned she had seen me in the coffee shop earlier that day. She ended up having to leave to pick up her friends at the airport, but I got her number, and she said she was really excited that she had met me.

Day #9
Unfortunately there is no mass transit here. Everyone drives. Back in NYC, this would have been so great to try, but I’ll have to wait until I get back. If everything goes as planned, I will be back in NYC by mid October! So technically a half off day.

Because I have been really focused on getting my move to NYC in order, I haven’t given as much time to GC as I would like. So, I was at the coffee shop meeting with a family member and I noticed two beautiful blonds walk in. They started working on a puzzle at their table. I ended up having to leave with my family member, but later that day I went to the same Dive Bar from Day 8 and found both of the blonds sitting at the bar. I found a seat near them, and asked them if I had seen them at the coffee shop earlier. They were very warm, and talkative about their puzzle, and we talked for a couple minutes about yoga and things to do around town. An older lady who knew one of the blonds interrupted and they left soon after.

I know this was technically one approach (Should have gone for 2) but these two girls were easily the most attractive and, since they were together, most intimidating approach I have done yet. I was sweating.

Onto day #10!

 

[SirRobin]

DAY #10 COMPLETED

Holy shit I feel like a champion. This took me so long to complete. Something about the idea of opening with something so forward as “are you single?” was incredibly intimidating. I got in my own way constantly. I think your fundamentals have to be so solid to pull this off in a way that yields any kind of positive result. I’m not there, yet. I also think the place I live right now is extremely conservative, thought, I let that get in my way more than it should.

The first four days of my attempt, I literally just walked around working up to the idea of approaching, and backing out. This obviously started to build up on itself, and I would end up quitting and thinking something like “i’ll just come at it differently“ or “Tomorrow I’ll feel differently“. Vague thoughts without any direction. I also had a few interactions with women while I was out that went well, without asking them if they were single. This only reinforced my growing opinion that this was not the approach for me — and maybe it isn’t, at least not right now. But I knew I was afraid of this. And that meant I had to do it.

I finally got over it yesterday and did it and I feel so much better for doing it. The first place I went was campus, where I approached 2 girls. The first was a blond wearing a cute dress. I approached her as we walked toward each other. She told me she was not single, and said sorry very dismissively. Girl number two was sitting on a lawn chair. I approached her and when I asked, she stuttered and looked at me like I said something she didn’t understand - but in a way I could tell was negative. She finally said no, but I would be willing to bet she was lying.

Girl three was a hired gun, albeit a beautiful one. I was out with my buddy at a local sports bar, and we noticed the cutest blonde waitress, and I told my buddy what I had to do, and did it. She said she was single, but I didn’t take the conversation any further. Hitting on women while they are at work is another block I should get over.

Girl four was at the complex - our only nightclub. I thought if I was in a place where I was overstimulated with women than I could approach a bunch, but this ended up being far more difficult than I imagined. A part of that is I have noticed the ratio of men to women in this town is dismal. For ever attractive women there are at least four other guys with varying, but decent fundamentals. I get I am complaining a lot, and that needs to stop. However, I am on my way back to NYC on October 23rd and I know that will also be intimidating, but I am so much more excited to do this work over there. Anyway, back to the girl, I saw one girl who was standing alone, or at least apart from her friends. I approached her and asked her if she was single, and she said yes, but she had a real resting bitch face, and it didn’t wave once during the interaction. I was wearing a really soft wooly sweater that’s fun to touch and I told her to touch it, which she did in a begrudging way. SHe just looked like she was having a terrible time, and since I was more preoccupied with hitting my approach goal, I didn’t stick around.

While I do feel accomplished that I finally got over this one, It’s difficult not to feel like I suck at this (because I do) but I always reach this point, this wall, and never break through it. It’s half way between “I don’t need this, I‘m fine without it” and “I need to do this because I suck at at it”.

This journal has been helpful, because it reinforces my commitment. I am committed to seeing this through and becoming the person I want to be.

Day 11 is a walk day - since I basically took three days to work on this last day, and while I did I was constantly working on my walk, my voice, and my style/appearance fundamentals. I am going to skip this day and continue working on my walk every time I am out and about.

I have been curating a list of actionable things to do as I go through articles on GC. Basically it will look like my own personal cheat sheet for what the Qualities of a Man are (the kind I want to be), and a fundamentals checklist. Trying to turn all that reading into action.

So, DAY 12 it is!

 

[SirRobin]

It’s been nearly three months since my last post. That means I failed.

I have accepted that failure, but I have not quit.

Right now I am sitting in the New York Public Library, in the great city of New York. I finally made it back! I have a new job (a couple actually) and a new apartment (it’s not much but it’ll do for now.)

I have a lot going for me now, a good many things I did not have two months ago. What I don’t have now is money. I am pretty much flat broke, and since I’m a newbie that makes it pretty hard for me to devote time to game because most of my time is spent working.

Luckily some of the work I have right now is acting work - voiceover work to be specific - which is part of my personal goals (that being more acting and creative work that is paid, less time spent on ‘stay afloat’ jobs.)

As for game: I will be restarting the newbie challenge soon. Right now I am trying to iron out my schedule so I have days I can reliably mark down as Game Days. I feel like I need to restart becasue NYC is vastly different from where I used to live. It is an intimidating city.

I have already gotten a number from a cute girl I approached in a local bagel shop though, and another number from a girl I met at a playwrite cold reeding meet. While that isn’t much, its enough to say I haven’t completely stopped approaching altogether. My goal is that by this time next year, I will have defeated my approach anxiety and have a reliable plan for meeting new people (especially women) every week.

I’m glad to be back in NYC.

 

[HammerEditor]

I’m glad to be back in NYC.

I will be visiting 'Noo Yawk' / Long Island from December 27th to December 30th. I will be bringing my vehicle to the island. I want to do some daygame or even nightgame there so my skills don't get rusty while I wait for the local college campuses, my favorite type of daygame venue, to re-open. I am thinking there would be plenty of volume on the streets of Manhattan before New Year's Eve.

I am also a beginner. I started my journey in game 3 months ago and I've done 79 sets so far. 74 of them were daygame while 5 were nightgame at several dive bars in Manhattan.

Would you like to wing with me in the city? It would help us both get back in the game. We could push each other to do approaches, critique each other's body language and share techniques. It looks like you have the mind of an actor/artist/musician while I'm an engineer. Our skillsets could compliment each other.

 

[HammerEditor]

My goal is that by this time next year, I will have defeated my approach anxiety and have a reliable plan for meeting new people (especially women) every week.

It took me 20 or so sets before I noticed a decrease in my AA. But now, it's less than 1/3 of what it used to be. I do miss opportunities now and then but I'm at the point where I make most approaches I see.

I have accepted that failure, but I have not quit.

I teetered on the brink of failure when I did 4 sets but got a really bad response on the 4th one. I almost quit, but somehow, after I did Set #5, I turned the ship around. What helped me was getting a PUA coach, telling my friends to hold me accountable and changing the criteria for 'success'.

 

[HammerEditor]

It’s been nearly three months since my last post

Just in case you also can't see PM chat notifications, I'm replying here to tell you that I replied to your PM

 

[SirRobin]

Just in case you also can't see PM chat notifications, I'm replying here to tell you that I replied to your PM

Hey Hammer, I sent you a PM, hit me up when you’re in town!

 

[SirRobin]

Alright, I have to own up to the fact that I completely fell off posting here. There are reasons, but I'm not here to make excuses. The point is; I'm back into the habit of approaching, and I have a set schedule with built in times to work on approach.

This post is going to basically be a dump of some interactions I've had over the past few months.

Highs: I brought home/went home with 2 girls. One was a lesbian (so she claimed) but was pretty eager to come home with me. I met her at a local spot near my place so logistics were right. I approached her at the bar, and she seemed interested in talking to me. After a while she casually mentioned she was a lesbian, and for the rest of the night we talked about sex. I basically saw it as good practice for sexual framing. There's a lot more to this story. It's a good one and could devote a whole post to it.

The second girl was one I met going out to a buddies birthday party at a notorious hookup bar. This girl was beautiful, and clearly looking for a rebound, which I was happy to be. Unfortunately, I was unprepared, yet again, without protection. I won't ever make this mistake again. I tried to pull her back to my place, but she wanted to go back to hers instead. My fuckup here was that I didn't make a run to a 24 hour bodega before going to her place (it was pretty late). I wasn't sure how to deal with that. We did everything but penetrative sex, so I can't really count it as a notch, but it was still a fun time.

Lows: I've gotten a lot of numbers from girls I've approached on the subway. Two of them seemed very promising, both attractive women. Some of them have turned in to dates, others haven't, and none of them have been turned into lays. I think I mess up a lot with texting. Lots of ghosting, and flaking. Went on one date I thought was great, but had to go to work after, so not good logistically, but she said she wanted to go out again. It never happened. Another date from a girl who's number I got at a bar went well, but I just wasn't into her. Cool person, not my type, or the quality I'm after.

I have been working on subway transit approaches for some time now, trying to get past that part of the Newbie Challenge. I get one or two, but I have yet to get 4 in a single day. Overall I've probably done something like 20, but I could never get passed 2 in one day.

Today, I did 5 and I feel great about it.

1st: A beautiful blonde girl. I told her she looked great, and complimented her style. She responded very warmly. When I asked where she was going, she said she was heading for the train to see her family. I would have stayed to talk but the train pulled up and I thought she was going to get on (it was another of the train I had just gotten off, so I thought it would have looked odd. Nonsense, really. I could have stayed talking longer but I let my anxiety eject me).

2nd: Almost immediately after, I went upstairs to a different train platform and saw a cute girl with a Burberry scarf. I complimented her on it, and she smiled. She told me her name was Isabella, and once again, my anxiety got the better of me and I ejected.

3rd: It took me a long time to get to number 3, but I came across the most beautiful girl I saw all day. She looked like Ana De Armas. Model hot. My problem was, I didn't say hi right away, and ended up getting on the same train car with her. I approached after we got off on the same stop, and it probably looked like I was following her (which I was). She ignored me when I said "Excuse me". I went the opposite way. Not a great approach.

4th: Also took me a long time to get to number 4, but on my way back to my neighborhood I was determined not to leave the subway until I approached a 4th. I saw a girl with a suitcase wearing socks with flames on them. I complimented her on her socks and we had a great little conversation about traveling. When my train came, I got on while she stayed on the platform.

5th: I had sat down on the train, when a beautiful dark skinned, well dressed woman got on and sat with her friend right next to me. She had a beautiful dark red nail color on, so I complimented her on that, and we got to talking about rings. I teased her about where she was from (she's visiting NYC) and asked if she wanted to go out with a stranger while she was in NYC. She laughed and I got her number.

Extra approach: Between girl 3 and 4 I had to get off the subway to use a bathroom in a food court I know well. This is a great place for approach, and while I was there I made contact with a cute blond. I complimented her coat, and while she was warm in her response and looked like she wanted to continue the conversation, she got a call from the friend she was meeting there. I left when she took the call.

So 6 approaches in total and 1 number. Not a bad day at all!

 

[SirRobin]

Last week I did 4 approaches on every day I had off, working on opening and flirting, banter. Over three days of dedicated approaching, I approached only about 15 women, and got two numbers out of it. Not as many as I would have liked. The beautifully girl who was visiting NYC from last week came out with me on a date, and spent two nights in a row at my place. We had a great time, but after she left NYC we kept talking, and I could tell she was beginning to fall in love with me. The long text conversations and continual investment into this girl got me all thrown off. We agreed to cut off contact yesterday.

Tomorrow I am going to try for 4 approaches that include teasing, and asking for a number. Now that my schedule is beginning to open up, I am aiming to stay on track and attempt the 4 girls a day for 30 days challenge.

I feel like my eye contact has improved tremendously, but now where I slip up is talking. I end up stumbling over my words. Gotta remember to slow down!

Of the 2 numbers I got this past week, one girl - a cute actress studying in NYC, from Mexico, has been responding, but slowly. No plans made yet.