Slightly Mature Student is Back to University but Can't Find Love on/off Campus

[Joy]

Hi all, I'm looking for advice regarding the following scenario.

I'm a 26 year old student that had to go back to college after dropping out the first time around. Academically, I'm doing just fine; however, I found that I can't really make friends or get girls. The first time around I definitely had more opportunities, but I didn't take life seriously back then. Now I just feel super alienated from everybody. I can't really relate to typical college guys because I just don't think like them and I have different interests, so my social circle is literally limited to one girl who friend zoned me when I first tried to pick up girls after I came back to school (I don't mind being friends with her, it's cool. She's actually a good friend.) It's a similar story on the love front - I feel that I can only relate to a few girls on campus but I have trouble finding them. (While some of you may think that there's something wrong with my because girls are attracted to older guys, that only applies when said guys have their shit together - clearly I'm working on it but I'm not out of the woods yet.)

Here's what I tried to do to solve the issue: I tried joining a bunch of clubs I'm interested in at uni including ballroom dance and improv but I ran into the same brick wall of being an outsider. When trying to date outside of the college crowd, the women I'm interested in tend do look down on me romantically when they find out I'm trying to make my life better and that I'm back to college. Sure they encourage me with their words and say that it's cool that I try to make my life better, but it doesn't come from a place of attraction, but rather empathy. So, as you can see, I get nowhere with that crowd either. Also, I'm not aiming to be a casanova either, I'd just like to get a good girlfriend.

So my question is: what should I do about all of this? I want to find both friends and love but, clearly, I have no I idea how to proceed or what to do. Therefore, I would appreciate any and all advice and suggestions.

Thank you all!

 

[Fuck This]

Re: Slightly Mature Student is Back to University but Can't Find Love on/off Cam

I think your mindset is holding you back...

We all were outsiders when we started college. some as freshmen, some as transfer students, and others as older non traditional students.

You might not feel you have much in common with other undergrads who are 5-8 years younger, but remember they are away from home and in a new environment as well, and don't have your life experience to fall back on.

Don't make your age an issue, but don't try to act like an 18 yo kid either. You have a level of sophistication that comes with age that should be valuable to anyone worth spending time with. You might have access to resources others don't. That is a value on or off campus. For your off campus interactions, maybe your student ID gets you a discounted rate at School sporting events, or free admission to the Rec Center, or first shot at tickets for entertainment on campus. Use that for cheap dates.

Also, there are Masters and PhD students around your age. Some of them might be TA's in your classes. I guarantee you have a better chance of dating them than some 18 year old gangly freshman from East Bumfuck TN.