Small penis- is casual sex not for me? TMI warning.

[ohwhatthehell]

So.. this is an awkward question.

I think we all know that size does matters; being moderately above-average sized has enormous social/media/sexual traction. Average sized too, while less socially obsessed upon, is evidently more than enough to get the job done. Good thing that the vast majority of men on planet earth fall into the latter catagory.

Once we get significantly below average sized though; not only is it considered undesirable (the word 'disappointment seems to come up a lot), but anecdotally, it seems like it can become detrimental to relationships, as it starts becoming extremely difficult to physically give women strong orgasms (I can't seem to find them right now; but I can try to provide links to the articles/discussions I'm referring to on request). Biologically, you're stuck as a bad lover.

I fall into this latter category. I'm about 4.5 inches erect with markedly below average girth (like.. 4.4 circumference? Less than 4.5 certainly, which is about 1.4 inches diameter). To illustrate, this is slightly longer than an iphone, and the thickness of a very slender girl's two fingers. I know what the lowest averages are. I'm way below them.

I know that GC is all about self-improvement. I love that. Its the reason I've stayed with GC (albeit mostly as a lurker); its helped me learn social skills through proxy of pickup, and I credit the advice in the blog and boards for the majority of my existing friendships. I plan to keep using it.

But when it comes to improving as a lover, I'm afraid I simply don't have enough to begin for any girl to even FEEL me during sex. Experienced guys; from what you've seen, am I shooting myself in the foot by trying to learn pickup and going for casual sex?

 

[Eric]

Hah, your name is perfect. "Oh what the hell, fuck it".

Honestly, I don't have a lot of advice other than getting really really really good at fellatio and fingering.

This board is friendly to penises of all sizes.

 

[ohwhatthehell]

Honestly, I don't have a lot of advice other than getting really really really good at fellatio and fingering.

This board is friendly to penises of all sizes.

I don't doubt that it is! The GC forum is unusually tolerant/patient in general.

The real world is a less forgiving however. Chase's excellent article https://www.girlschase.com/content/make-her-orgasm-hard-sex-8-minutes-or-less puts it pretty bluntly;

Penetrative sex is REAL sex...Women know this, and while they enjoy men who give them orgasms with other parts of their bodies - tongues, fingers, hands, sex toys - these men aren't real men the way men who make women cum with their penises are.

I don't know. I guess I'm trying to figure out how much I'm going to have to adjust my expectations as I start my journey into pickup.

Hah, your name is perfect. "Oh what the hell, fuck it".

Haha, yeah. Definitely reflects my attitude at the moment.

 

[Franco]

owth,

This topic has already been covered, and I think you'll find that Chase's answer will make you feel much more confident:

• Does size matter?

Cheers,

Franco

 

[Marty]

Hey Mr. "Oh What The Hell", welcome!

I'd normally remain silent on a subject like this, but I wanted to point something out that seems to be staring me in the face, though others may have missed it, I don't know.

Allow me to introduce the analogy of underwear. If you go out and get yourself some sexy pairs of undershorts, sure, you feel better about yourself when you put them on, it says a lot about your sense of style and self-worth, and if it gets to the stage where a girl is pulling off your pants, she may briefly exclaim upon your sexy undershorts and be titillated by them for a moment, before they too come off.

But you could get by with a pair of outdated, unfashionable, moth-eaten undershorts and most likely, though the girl who sees them might mock you lovingly for a few seconds, your results with her will likely be very similar.

There's an awful lot of work you can do on opening, the remainder of the approach, setting up a date, remote communication by phone or text message, dating itself, physical escalation and isolation of a girl into a private location. For the majority of this, your pride and joy will most likely remain zipped firmly inside.

Once a girl is excited enough to want to get naked with you, I find it highly improbable that she will pull out the measuring-tape at the eleventh hour, only to inform you regretfully that you do not meet the requirements for admittance. (I stand prepared to be corrected if I am wrong.)

Your post subject-line refers to "casual sex". I'd imagine that a one-off is achievable for you on multiple and continuing occasions. If you have to worry about anything at all, it's more likely to be repeat performances, depending on the girl's level of satisfaction.

-Marty

 

[luego]

Hah, your name is perfect. "Oh what the hell, fuck it".

Honestly, I don't have a lot of advice other than getting really really really good at fellatio and fingering.

This board is friendly to penises of all sizes.

Just for clarification, I *hope* you mean "get really good a cunnilingus and fingering". Fellatio is not a gender neutral word.

Otherwise, I agree here - your problem is largely mental. Your size should be sufficient (although not ideal) that good sex mechanics can still get you by. And if you do have a problem, it will be with getting repeat customers, not initials.

 

[Eric]

Hah, your name is perfect. "Oh what the hell, fuck it".

Honestly, I don't have a lot of advice other than getting really really really good at fellatio and fingering.

This board is friendly to penises of all sizes.

Just for clarification, I *hope* you mean "get really good a cunnilingus and fingering". Fellatio is not a gender neutral word.

hahaha, that's perfect, I didn't realize I wrote that. Meant cunnilingus. I guess fellatio works too.

 

[ohwhatthehell]

Thanks for the kind welcome Marty.

There's an awful lot of work you can do on opening, the remainder of the approach...

Agreed! I perceive pick-up as a fairly distinct (though still linked) skill from sex.
I'll be honest; the point of my concern here is that if I can't potentially be a decent lover, I kind of wonder what I'm doing learning pickup in the first place. Given that the entire point of pickup is to facilitate getting and getting good at sex (that's how I perceive it anyway.. unless I've gotten a hold of the wrong end of the bat here).

...with all of this said, I'm starting to think that my question might have been somewhat pointless; by definition, 'small' sizes are surely somewhat rare, and the chances of meeting someone who's walked in these shoes are surely slim on a PUA board. Guess the best I can do right now is grow a thick skin, bite the bullet and find out if I can learn to work around this issue.

Your size should be sufficient (although not ideal) that good sex mechanics can still get you by.

Definitely my hope, luego.

And if you do have a problem, it will be with getting repeat customers, not initials.

...this, I'll try not to think about until it actually becomes a problem.

 

[Nova]

you could wear a strapon