FR Smokin Filipina

[BarryS1]

6/4

Wanted to create a FR showing a situational opener on the hottest girl I’ve ever approached. Since I started approaching in August, this is the most motivated I’ve ever been. A girl I wanted a relationship with disappeared and did not respond over a 3 week period to my 2 texts. Since Monday, I’ve approached 19 girls during daygame to get her off my mind.

Social momentum started with a great in-person interview and going to my self-defense class after work. I stopped to grab water and a protein shake at a grocery store after class. I had a black athletic shorts hitting 2 in. above the knee (that’s popular here), a blue tank top, bright red basketball shoes, and sunglasses on my head. The clothes were tight fitting because I am a bit larger than tonned, at 170lbs 5’8’’.

I was walking to the cash register when I spotted a Filipina in a low cut, two-piece sun dress with E-tits and a toned ass in the back. I live in a dense urban area with a diversity of cultures, but I have NEVER seen such a slender, yet curvaceous girl IN MY LIFE. I turn around and head in her estimated direction, running into her at the wine/beer cooler aisle. I was staring at the wine when I heard her heels clicking on the ground as she turned the corner 20ft. away. I try getting eye contact, but she’s concentrating on the beer, so I start closing the distance in 5ft. bounds. I pick up a six-pack of IPA and open situationally after she closes a freezer door.

Me: Hi

Girl: (Looks over)

Me: I saw you looking at the beers earlier. Why do you think there’s so many IPAs on the shelf?

Girl: It’s a trend (smile and confident answer). Those beers are popping up all over the place now during the summer time. People love that bitter hoppy flavor with kinda of a carmel aftertaste (swirling her fingers in the air).

Me: Wow. I don’t think I’ve EVER met someone who used adjectives like that to describe beer. You must be an expert.

Girl: Oh! Haha! I’ve tried a lot of the beers here. I don’t like the bitter beers like Hefes or IPAs. I have to know it, my boyfriend is a bartender.

Me: Okay, why are you shopping here for beer then? All the fancy stuff is at X beer store down the street.

(An elderly couple walks into the aisle, one pushing a cart, the other on crutches)

Me: Hey, lets move over here.

(As the elderly couple moves, she wheels her cart on the other side of me about 1 ½ ft. away)

Girl: (Starts yabbering about beer for a good 30 sec. with such enthusiasm that I didn’t know where to break in).

Me: How come you know so much about beer? What’s your occupation miss?

Girl: (Says she works for a Japanese trading company and does shipping. She goes off topic again and starts talking about Japanese sake now).

Me: (I break in) Did you say sake? That’s a little different, but I don’t mind trying exotic things (I let it sink in).

Girl: (She stopped talking, but chuckles and maintains eye contact).

Me: You said you work for a Japanese company. Are you Japanese…..?

Girl: No, I’m….

Me: Filipino (We say it simultaneously).

Girl: (She mentions how being Filipino is great in this area b/c of the diversity and that people were surprised seeing her in others places in N. CA).

Me: (I told her story about my Filipino female friend being born in a all-white area, but managed to make the most of it).

Girl: (She said she didn’t really care anyway, was something she noticed).

Me: Wow… I like girls who don’t care what other people think (I let it sink in)

(First Kino – I pinch her arm)

Girl: (She stopped talking again and looked in her eyes for 2 sec., but then she starts yabbering about some IPA.).

Me: (Mentions how much she likes beer, but said it had to be paired with the right food).

Girl: Food, yeah that’s important, but beer is better when paired with the right people as well.

Me: So if we were together drinking beer, you’d have a Coors Light with me?

(Second kino, I pinched her arm)

Girl: Haha! Maybe!

Me: So tell me more about your pairing style. You seem to go for bold, exotic flavors.

Girl: Like I said, it just depends.

Me: So you are saying that beer is the type to take home on a …special… night and pair with chocolate-covered strawberries?

Girl: No, I hate chocolate! I wouldn’t do that!

Me: I can’t believe it, a girl who doesn’t like chocolate!

(Third kino – I pinch her arm)

Me: Well what if I gave you my name. I’m Barry (Extend my hand).

Girl: Hi, I’m X (Puts her hand on top of mine, but doesn’t leave it long). So really, why are you getting the beer? Who are you gonna share that with?

Me: Who know? Maybe I’ll drink it by myself.

Girl: I can do that in one night, that’s easy!

Me: I thought you were this nice, attractive girl in a fancy dress……but now I think you have some bad in you.

(Fourth kino – I lay my hand on her arm touching the cart)

Girl: (She doesn’t say anything, small smile – almost nervous)

Me: I know you have a BF, but do you wanna meet up again?

Girl: I’m not sure, but I’ll take your number (nervous laugh).

Me: Oh really, and then what? (surprise me facial expression)

I pressured her and she said in a committed relationship. I guessed right that she lives with him as well. She said I was out of her age range and probably in my 20s. Asked if that was a problem, she said probably and started facing away from me.

I ended the conversation b/c she seemed uncomfortable for the first time. She was behind me while I was ringing up my stuff at the cash register and she avoided eye contact until one moment. I said goodbye X and she remembered my name too.



Overview:

This was the longest daygame conversation I’ve ever had with the hottest girl I’ve ever approached (maybe top 3 I’ve ever seen). I don’t think I was sexual enough, but I did stop her ranting several times and got us on track. I should of screened her harder on her “badgirl” lifestyle and made some sexual frames there. Like, “I think that’s a good thing you like to drink and make bad decisions. Do you know what I’m thinking about now?”

I seriously can’t believe she was in her 30s. Totally blows away any college girl I’ve ever seen in person.

 

[Chase]

Barry-

Really nice report here - great dialogue, and you were hitting this one out of the park right up until the end. Some analysis:

Me: Hi

Girl: (Looks over)

Me: I saw you looking at the beers earlier. Why do you think there’s so many IPAs on the shelf?

Girl: It’s a trend (smile and confident answer). Those beers are popping up all over the place now during the summer time. People love that bitter hoppy flavor with kinda of a carmel aftertaste (swirling her fingers in the air).

Me: Wow. I don’t think I’ve EVER met someone who used adjectives like that to describe beer. You must be an expert.

Girl: Oh! Haha! I’ve tried a lot of the beers here. I don’t like the bitter beers like Hefes or IPAs. I have to know it, my boyfriend is a bartender.

Me: Okay, why are you shopping here for beer then? All the fancy stuff is at X beer store down the street.

(An elderly couple walks into the aisle, one pushing a cart, the other on crutches)

Me: Hey, lets move over here.

(As the elderly couple moves, she wheels her cart on the other side of me about 1 ½ ft. away)

Girl: (Starts yabbering about beer for a good 30 sec. with such enthusiasm that I didn’t know where to break in).

Me: How come you know so much about beer? What’s your occupation miss?

Girl: (Says she works for a Japanese trading company and does shipping. She goes off topic again and starts talking about Japanese sake now).

Me: (I break in) Did you say sake? That’s a little different, but I don’t mind trying exotic things (I let it sink in).

Girl: (She stopped talking, but chuckles and maintains eye contact).

Me: You said you work for a Japanese company. Are you Japanese…..?

Girl: No, I’m….

Me: Filipino (We say it simultaneously).

Girl: (She mentions how being Filipino is great in this area b/c of the diversity and that people were surprised seeing her in others places in N. CA).

Me: (I told her story about my Filipino female friend being born in a all-white area, but managed to make the most of it).

Girl: (She said she didn’t really care anyway, was something she noticed).

Me: Wow… I like girls who don’t care what other people think (I let it sink in)

So far, so good.

An easier one if you don't think she's something is to say, "You work for a Japanese company. But you're not Japanese..." and let her fill in the blanks.

One caution: be careful about calling things a person works with day-in and day-out exotic. When something's ordinary to you and other people call it "exotic", it makes them come across as inexperienced / unworldly / somewhat naïve (every time I have some girl comment, "Wow, that's so exotic!" about XYZ thing in my life, all I can think is, "Gah, she's inexperienced!").

The overt sexual frame here is good ("I don't mind trying something a little exotic"), but when you throw one of these out you generally won't want to keep going with them (i.e., the ones where you talk about what you want to do to her) unless she is a.) throwing them back at you or b.) clearly submitting and becoming more tender around you when you do it.

Girl: (She stopped talking again and looked in her eyes for 2 sec., but then she starts yabbering about some IPA.).

Me: (Mentions how much she likes beer, but said it had to be paired with the right food).

Girl: Food, yeah that’s important, but beer is better when paired with the right people as well.

Me: So if we were together drinking beer, you’d have a Coors Light with me?

Good.

Could be better if you made it more open-ended or more playful: "So what beer would you pair up drinking with me? Would I be a Miller High Life or are you going to bust out the PBR?" But that's minor.

Me: So you are saying that beer is the type to take home on a …special… night and pair with chocolate-covered strawberries?

Girl: No, I hate chocolate! I wouldn’t do that!

Me: I can’t believe it, a girl who doesn’t like chocolate!

BIG missed opportunity here - instead of making a blanket statement about women, which pushes her farther away from you (e.g., if you said, "I don't like baseball!" and she said, "I can't believe it! A guy who doesn't like baseball!" --> the interaction now feels much more sterile/neutral and a lot more impersonal), you can say, "Well then what DO you like?"

The bonus here is that any time you get to ask a girl what DOES she like and say it with the right tones, her response tells you spades.

Girl: Hi, I’m X (Puts her hand on top of mine, but doesn’t leave it long). So really, why are you getting the beer? Who are you gonna share that with?

Me: Who know? Maybe I’ll drink it by myself.

Girl: I can do that in one night, that’s easy!

Great first response by you here - this is perfect. It makes it easy for her to invite herself if she's interested. She didn't take the bait here... but some girls will.

In response to her second remark, I'd suggest: "Maybe you should come give me a hand with this, then."

Me: I know you have a BF, but do you wanna meet up again?

*hrngh* WHY mention the boyfriend again? You seem to be prompting her to say "no" here. Argh.

Get her lost in emotions with you and not thinking about him. If he really is important to her, you don't need to remind her of him - she'll remember.

If he isn't, you don't want to remind her either - let her forget about him and enjoy being with you.

Also, "do you wanna meet up again" is extremely vague, non-specific, and too much to think about. The path of least resistance here is to just say "no", rather than sit and try to figure out what she's signing herself up for exactly if she says "okay" to such an ambiguous proposal.

Much, much better:

• Barry: Hey, so let's grab some food sometime this week or next. I'd like to pick your brain about brews some more and find out if you really do think I'm a Coors Light man.

Girl: I’m not sure, but I’ll take your number (nervous laugh).

Polite rejection. I think you had this until the mention of the boyfriend + overly ambiguous close.

I pressured her and she said in a committed relationship. I guessed right that she lives with him as well.

"Everybody needs to take a breather sometimes." --> if she's feeling at all stifled in the relationship, you can position yourself as the fun breath of fresh air from it, which you've already demonstrated you are.

She said I was out of her age range and probably in my 20s. Asked if that was a problem, she said probably and started facing away from me.

Do NOT ask if it's a problem. Use this material.

Nothing is a problem if you have a solution.

Last time I asked someone if there was a problem I got decked. I advise you to learn from my mistake and not ask people if there's a problem, but just to solve that problem for them instead.

This was the longest daygame conversation I’ve ever had with the hottest girl I’ve ever approached (maybe top 3 I’ve ever seen). I don’t think I was sexual enough, but I did stop her ranting several times and got us on track. I should of screened her harder on her “badgirl” lifestyle and made some sexual frames there. Like, “I think that’s a good thing you like to drink and make bad decisions. Do you know what I’m thinking about now?”

Hmm... that's very polarizing. Going to screen a lot of girls out, but the ones that it screens in will be super into you. I'd normally recommend something more subtle, but if you want to play around with it, I've seen guys pull this off to good effect.

I seriously can’t believe she was in her 30s. Totally blows away any college girl I’ve ever seen in person.

Asian women age very gracefully. I was consistently shocked when I first started meeting more Asian women after I left Pennsylvania and they'd look like teenagers but be in their thirties. I used to ask them what they did to look so young and they'd laugh and say it was something about their village or whatever, but eventually you just get used to it. Actually, a lot of black women age quite gracefully too - I'm not sure why white women in particular age so poorly compared to other ethnicities. I tend to think it's some combination of tanning + hard partying - the white women I've known in their 30s who never tanned and never were hard partiers tended to age just about as well as their black and Asian counterparts, I've found.

Chase

 

[BarryS1]

Chase, can’t thank you enough for your commentary on the FR. This was a long report and I really appreciate the time you took!

An easier one if you don't think she's something is to say, "You work for a Japanese company. But you're not Japanese..." and let her fill in the blanks.

One caution: be careful about calling things a person works with day-in and day-out exotic. When something's ordinary to you and other people call it "exotic", it makes them come across as inexperienced / unworldly / somewhat naïve (every time I have some girl comment, "Wow, that's so exotic!" about XYZ thing in my life, all I can think is, "Gah, she's inexperienced!").

The overt sexual frame here is good ("I don't mind trying something a little exotic"), but when you throw one of these out you generally won't want to keep going with them (i.e., the ones where you talk about what you want to do to her) unless she is a.) throwing them back at you or b.) clearly submitting and becoming more tender around you when you do it.

I see what you mean about the sexual frame. I remember your article about cutting the thread when deep-diving goes in the wrong direction - seems like it happened with a frame too! I should of cut the thread after the exotic comment because it triggered a negative story about herself. I was fortunate to have a friend going through a similar situation. If not, I wouldn’t know how to connect with her.

BIG missed opportunity here - instead of making a blanket statement about women, which pushes her farther away from you (e.g., if you said, "I don't like baseball!" and she said, "I can't believe it! A guy who doesn't like baseball!" --> the interaction now feels much more sterile/neutral and a lot more impersonal), you can say, "Well then what DO you like?"

The bonus here is that any time you get to ask a girl what DOES she like and say it with the right tones, her response tells you spades.

Now that you phrase the banter as a gender stereotype, it does seem offensive. I admit to getting bitter when hearing gender stereotypes about men, especially when a girl says them in front of me.

Since the girl was amping up her energy again, I could of used a pregnant pause and sexy eye contact while saying:

Me: Sooo…..what do you like?

Great first response by you here - this is perfect. It makes it easy for her to invite herself if she's interested. She didn't take the bait here... but some girls will.

In response to her second remark, I'd suggest: "Maybe you should come give me a hand with this, then.”

I saw the same window of asking the girl out, but for some reason felt the need to address the boyfriend. When I got halfway through the sentence about the boyfriend, she barely held eye-contact with me anymore. Darnit, I brought up a problems she may have not mentioned. I am so used to dealing with this objection that I thought being the one to bring it up would be the dominant strategy. Clearly this one tanked though

Also, "do you wanna meet up again" is extremely vague, non-specific, and too much to think about. The path of least resistance here is to just say "no", rather than sit and try to figure out what she's signing herself up for exactly if she says "okay" to such an ambiguous proposal.

Much, much better:

Barry: Hey, so let's grab some food sometime this week or next. I'd like to pick your brain about brews some more and find out if you really do think I'm a Coors Light man.

I have to admit my "date asking question" have not been personalized - usually with food or coffee (no matter what we talked about). I will try to incorporate a girl's wants into the type of date according to her preferences. It’s almost like I was afraid to say too much incase logistics get thrown into the conversation and waste time.

Do NOT ask if it's a problem. Use this material.

Nothing is a problem if you have a solution.

Last time I asked someone if there was a problem I got decked. I advise you to learn from my mistake and not ask people if there's a problem, but just to solve that problem for them instead.

Chase I got my template down for the age question. I know you sent me the link a couple months ago with a conversation with Zac, but I finally got to it:

1) Ask how old she is first

2) Make banter about her age

For example:

-That means you’re collecting social security right?

-You probably have 10 cats and knit all the time.

-You buying stuff for your bingo friends right?

3) Answer response to her age question

-Have her guess and say 1 more.

4) If she is still persistent - Lightly debunk young girls

Younger ladies don’t have much to talk about. IDK, Maybe too much reality T.V. or social media - I’m not allured by them. Sure they are physically attractive, but not wordily.

Asian women age very gracefully. I was consistently shocked when I first started meeting more Asian women after I left Pennsylvania and they'd look like teenagers but be in their thirties. I used to ask them what they did to look so young and they'd laugh and say it was something about their village or whatever, but eventually you just get used to it. Actually, a lot of black women age quite gracefully too - I'm not sure why white women in particular age so poorly compared to other ethnicities. I tend to think it's some combination of tanning + hard partying - the white women I've known in their 30s who never tanned and never were hard partiers tended to age just about as well as their black and Asian counterparts, I've found.

I started noticing the differences between the party and non-party white girls in high school. I noticed by the time the girls got to their senior year, they looked almost... worn out. I live in the suburbs, so partying for those girls begins in freshmen year.

It seems the approach tanked because I anticipated an objection and brought it forth before she could. I am seeing a similarity between the age and boyfriend solutions. I could ask the question first and provide a solution, but DONT SAY ITS A PROBLEM.

For example:

Sebastian Drake asks the age question, but doesn’t say its a problem.

Ricardus could ask if a girl is single, but still dates her anyway.


I see the light Chase thanks!