- Joined
- Oct 9, 2012
- Messages
- 5,650
Over on the thread about members' current sticking points, several guys mentioned difficulties escalating to sex with girls they'd pulled back home. In particular, I want to highlight @scartissue's reply:
scartissue hasn't shared reports and he didn't go into detail about what he's doing with girls before the pull.
But I suspect what is happening is he's making the approach, having a friendly and interesting chat, then winding up with the girl in his place... suddenly she realizes she is alone with this guy... he seems like a nice, friendly, maybe attractive guy... but there has been little-to-no build up to sex whatsoever.
He starts looking for windows to build to sex, but they aren't there at all, and he has to spend a long time building up to them, if he manages to create them at all.
What's happening here is that the idea of the guy she's with having sexual/romantic intentions and pulling her in order to make something sexual happen is not in her brain. She might suspect it, but if it isn't being implied throughout the earlier parts of the pickup, she is not mentally prepared for it, and her walls are up.
If you don't want to be stuck trying to switch the vibe from "friendly" to "sexual" at your place, and having this whole mountain to overcome, you need to be setting sexual frames from the get-go. That means:
The more of this you do, the more thoroughly you set the frame that this is a budding sexual connection.
The more you are going to create the expectation in her that this interaction she's having with you points toward sex.
The more at peace she is going to become with the notion that by her complying with you and accompanying you, she is continuously agreeing to her own seduction.
That way, by the time you get back to your place with the girl, she already has the expectation that this is leading somewhere sexual; hopefully she is hoping and anticipating that it will (i.e., she is excited about the potential); and the work you have left to do at the seduction location is fairly minimal.
I spent a few years early on in my seduction career trying to figure out how to make the switch from "casual" to "seductive."
One day I realized I wouldn't have to MAKE that switch if I was just seductive the whole way through. That realization opened up a lot of doors (and labia).
That doesn't mean you need to come out of the gates with bedroom eyes and a husky voice right on the opener.
It DOES mean you should be kicking off with teasing, touch, flirtation, sexy nonverbals, and escalating the sexiness as the seduction proceeds.
Do so, and you'll find all the barriers and awkwardness you get with girls you pull to your place grow fewer and fewer.
Chase
scartissue hasn't shared reports and he didn't go into detail about what he's doing with girls before the pull.
But I suspect what is happening is he's making the approach, having a friendly and interesting chat, then winding up with the girl in his place... suddenly she realizes she is alone with this guy... he seems like a nice, friendly, maybe attractive guy... but there has been little-to-no build up to sex whatsoever.
He starts looking for windows to build to sex, but they aren't there at all, and he has to spend a long time building up to them, if he manages to create them at all.
What's happening here is that the idea of the guy she's with having sexual/romantic intentions and pulling her in order to make something sexual happen is not in her brain. She might suspect it, but if it isn't being implied throughout the earlier parts of the pickup, she is not mentally prepared for it, and her walls are up.
If you don't want to be stuck trying to switch the vibe from "friendly" to "sexual" at your place, and having this whole mountain to overcome, you need to be setting sexual frames from the get-go. That means:
- Teasing girls
- Flirting with girls
- Touching girls
- Asking for plenty of compliance
- Future projecting romantic/sexual scenarios
- Disqualifying yourself as a boyfriend
- Qualifying girls as adventurous & spontaneous
- Chase framing girls
- Using sex talk on girls
- Telling sex stories with girls
- Setting other kinds of sexual frames
- Being sexy and having a sexual vibe
- Projecting sexual intent
- Pre-empting objections to sex (e.g., using ASD busters)
The more of this you do, the more thoroughly you set the frame that this is a budding sexual connection.
The more you are going to create the expectation in her that this interaction she's having with you points toward sex.
The more at peace she is going to become with the notion that by her complying with you and accompanying you, she is continuously agreeing to her own seduction.
That way, by the time you get back to your place with the girl, she already has the expectation that this is leading somewhere sexual; hopefully she is hoping and anticipating that it will (i.e., she is excited about the potential); and the work you have left to do at the seduction location is fairly minimal.
I spent a few years early on in my seduction career trying to figure out how to make the switch from "casual" to "seductive."
One day I realized I wouldn't have to MAKE that switch if I was just seductive the whole way through. That realization opened up a lot of doors (and labia).
That doesn't mean you need to come out of the gates with bedroom eyes and a husky voice right on the opener.
It DOES mean you should be kicking off with teasing, touch, flirtation, sexy nonverbals, and escalating the sexiness as the seduction proceeds.
Do so, and you'll find all the barriers and awkwardness you get with girls you pull to your place grow fewer and fewer.
Chase
