Staying emotionally cold

[E007R]

Hi dudes, first post so go easy.

How do you stay detached from a girl emotionally? This girl (22 years old, smoking hot) is like undoubtedly the highest quality I've managed to bed yet, it took all the knowledge I've learnt on the site, and alot of focus and although the first time I had her in my bed visibly ready, and she declined due to "that time of the month" syndrome, a week later I made her orgasm 5 times and say things like: "best sex ever", "didn't know I could come that hard" etc.

So that was a week ago, and she started sending me very romantic music, and although she finds it difficult to reiterate her feelings in person, I took the lyrics as her expressing said feelings.

And then last night I think I made a terrible mistake. I told her I was madly in love with her (over text) and she then went dead quiet for about 10 minutes, and came back with: "Sleep tight my sex toy"

This morning(again over text) she seemed colder than usual. I don't know how or why my emotions triggered me to do that tho, I guess at that moment I really felt like this girl is one in a million, but I also realize those are scarcity thoughts and I shouldn't have them. The thing is we have a really nice thing going and I don't wanna mess it up. I'm afraid I came off initially with so much sexual vibe that she can never put me in the boyfriend zone. How do I:

1. stop getting emotional
2. get her back in the frame I had her before confessing my feelings

Thanks to all who can find time to respond

 

[luego]

Ouch. I'd assume you freaked her the fuck out. And rightfully so, if she's a brand new girl and you just slept with her a week ago. It's bad enough to admit that you like her/see a future/etc... if you said you love her, she's running for the hills. She tried to re-frame it as sexual, which is likely a good thing, even if she is actually into you.

You declared your undying love via text. So nothing post-coital she can dismiss, nothing drunk, etc.

Don't text her again. If someone else can help, great, but I'd assume no-contact would be a bad play here and would seem clearly reactionary/cowardly. I'd try get her out, face-to-face, immediately. You're in hardcore damage control mode. As for what you can actually say to her, I guess it depends on the precise texts you sent. But it's basically past any "lover" role, into "let's slow it the fuck down and have fun with this and see where it goes" boyfriend territory. Hopefully she's ok with that.

If you're new into this game, it sounds like you're doing very well on technique/mechanics, but haven't internalized it yet into abundance, etc. So you know more than you can do. Trust me, I'm in the same situation. It leads to incongruance, which is a killer. Good luck.

 

[E007R]

Hey luego, thanks man.

I decided to send her a text that went something like: "Hey, about last night, I shouldn't have said that it was not cool and what I think I meant was that you're not just a fuck, I do care about you"

She was a bit better after that so I started mirroring her vibe and it seems I saved it. Text:
Her:" I thought about Friday quite a bit today" (friday is the day I bedded her)
Me: " I'm glad you haven't forgotten about friday"
Her: " how could I ever forget"
Me: " Yeah, it was pretty amazing"
Her: " You were amazing"
Me: " You wanna do it again?"
Her: " maybe (blushy smily thingy emoticon)"

So judging by that I think I may have turned the situation to a more sexual frame and if I can sort out the (really shitty) logistics I can get in there a couple more times.

 

[ILoveElla]

This girl (22 years old, smoking hot)

Man, that's the hottest age!

And then last night I think I made a terrible mistake. I told her I was madly in love with her (over text)

Well if it wasn't over text, I'd forgive you more easily! But then again, I haven't bedded a "smokin' hot one in a million" type gal

 

[E007R]

Hey ella, I know right, I wish I could post up pics of this girl.. she's gorgeous. She's really tiny she looks 16. We had a good conversation last night and I stayed away completely from any in love subjects and it looks like she's forgiven and forgotten.
It's just so hard when you're still getting used to the change in the way you handle girls, I used to be the hopeless romantic and it got me alot of girlfriends but they'd always get with some other guy and I never knew why. Well now I know. I just hope it becomes second nature soon cause right know it takes alot of focus and it tires me quickly.

I have to say if wasn't for chase and the guys there is no way I would have been able to pull it off. She also put up some last minute resistance just as I was about to go in but I brushed it off, told her she's cute and took her. She loved it. I'd like to do a LR of the whole thing some time it's pretty ridiculous.

Thanks again guys

 

[daviddreamer]

Just keep the sexual vibe going as long as you can...if she wants to make you her boyfriend then she will start putting in the effort. In the meantime bed other girls as well...I mean after all you're still single.

 

[E007R]

@ daviddreamer I've got three girls in rotation, so yeah, one is a 34 year old MILF, who used to work with me, the other is a 26 year old professional blonde with the craziest body. And then this 18 year old babe. I'm turning 30 in November so I think that's a good balance, going to hit a dive bar on Saturday, and see if I can balance that out even more, oh and I'm sleeping regularly with all these girls now, 18 y/o is coming over for sushi tomorrow.. "sushi" hehe..