Start of August last year I started seeing a girl in Boston whom I liked quite a bit. I live in California however. I've been looking for a job, and for various reasons, I've been going back to Boston from time to time, and every time I would see this girl. I've thought about being serious with her, but I was hesitant since it would be long distance and I don't know where I would end up, plus she's trying to figure out which law school to go to on top of that. About a week ago we were facetiming and she told me she started seeing a guy. I had already been thinking about just moving to Boston, finding a normal job while I search for an engineering job. I have tons of friends who still live there, I love the area, and while I love my parents its a bit tiresome living with them still. So her saying that shocked my system a bit (which I needed) so now with some lucky timing I have a place to live in Boston and I'll be moving in with one of my best friends over there. So, I called her today and told her about my plans to move there, and that I'd like to continue our relationship, make it serious. Here's the tricky part though. The guy she started seeing is her friend, they've known each other for a couple years now. On top of that, they're both in band, so there's a whole social circle there. People have been seeing them start dating, and they know each other's friends and such. So, she is quite conflicted, said she would need some time to think and talk to the other guy about it. She does still have strong feelings for me, but I'm not sure it would outweigh the social implications of seeing me over him. Now in my eyes, I'm very certain she will pick him. To be with me she would have to awkwardly bring me up, tell her friend of two years that she wants to be with me, then all the friends know and it'll be a hassle it seems for her social circle (granted, bandcest happens often, so they're probably used to people dating and stopping dating each other and whatnot within their circle). Plus they've been spending time together for almost a month, so its new, fresh, recent with him. For me its mostly memories. So ya, very slim chance she'll actually pick me. Sooooo...
I haven't read too much on stealing girls away from their boyfriends. I've never really found the need to, nor necessarily would want to. But for this girl, I couldn't give two shits about this other guys feelings. I want her, and I'll do everything I can to get her back. I know the general gist is to not plea, and just date other women, which I absolutely will be doing anyway when I get settled over there. But if anyone has any advice that may pertain to my particular situation, that would be great. Or if there is a particular article that would be of use. One thing also, if I were to steal her away, I would assume I would have to spend time with her in person just as friends. Not entirely sure how to approach that though, since we're probably not gonna run into each other by happenstance. How do I go about just asking her to hang? Granted, we technically haven't "broken up" and we were never serious, nonetheless the emotions are there quite a bit, and it'll be some time for me to process us not seeing each other. With that said, it wouldn't be too too weird for me to suggest us hanging out as friends since we technically were never boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever. Finally, given the situation with her social circle, would it even be possible to steal her away. Whether or not its worth it is a different question, but I'm willing to put as much work as I have to. Again I'll be seeing other women anyway in the meantime. But ya, any advice or help would be appreciated. Thanks!
Angel
I haven't read too much on stealing girls away from their boyfriends. I've never really found the need to, nor necessarily would want to. But for this girl, I couldn't give two shits about this other guys feelings. I want her, and I'll do everything I can to get her back. I know the general gist is to not plea, and just date other women, which I absolutely will be doing anyway when I get settled over there. But if anyone has any advice that may pertain to my particular situation, that would be great. Or if there is a particular article that would be of use. One thing also, if I were to steal her away, I would assume I would have to spend time with her in person just as friends. Not entirely sure how to approach that though, since we're probably not gonna run into each other by happenstance. How do I go about just asking her to hang? Granted, we technically haven't "broken up" and we were never serious, nonetheless the emotions are there quite a bit, and it'll be some time for me to process us not seeing each other. With that said, it wouldn't be too too weird for me to suggest us hanging out as friends since we technically were never boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever. Finally, given the situation with her social circle, would it even be possible to steal her away. Whether or not its worth it is a different question, but I'm willing to put as much work as I have to. Again I'll be seeing other women anyway in the meantime. But ya, any advice or help would be appreciated. Thanks!
Angel
