FR++ Still not passionate enough

[Dylan]

I met a girl doing day pick-up, got her number and arranged to meet to go for a drink in my usual spot. We talked for one long drink about all sorts of things - travel, work, future plans. Towards the end of the drink I invited her home, and it's this bit I want to focus on.

When I got inside I invited her to take off her shoes. Not straight away, but close enough. We sat down on the bed and I put on some music. I went for the kiss after a few minutes. She turned away, but accepted it quickly. I have a keyboard and we started messing about on that a bit, which distracted her a bit I think. That's obviously not a good thing.

I kissed her several more times but I didn't escalate further than that. In the end I ran out of time and she left.

This has happened to me several times so far this year and it's very frustrating. I need to become more passionate. Because I'm going through a dry spell I'm afraid of failure. I'm afraid of her getting up and leaving. This happens to me in other areas of life - I get scared about the possibility of failure and don't go for what I want. I'm not passionate enough.

I need to rouse her passion because she's not going to do that herself. I need to push things as far as I can, then pull back a bit.

So, next time, I'm going to push things like Chase suggests in his article. I'm not going to allow this to happen again - the key is to remember that it's on you to get girls comfortable and ready for sex. It's not going to happen otherwise. I'm just frustrated. Again. I need to harness that frustration and push.

This is the key paragraph:

"You must show passion to inspire passion in her and make her want you. You must be aggressive in moving things forward and getting ever more physical with her. And you must be persistent in trying and trying again and not losing faith even if she stops your ten or fifteen times, and you must not get upset or bitter and instead take it all in stride and understand that she simply isn’t comfortable enough yet and it’s your job to make her more comfortable with you touching her and getting increasingly more physical with her."

Still, it's a good thing that I'm able to take girls home that I've met on the street. That's not an easy thing to do - it's just closing it out.

I changed my process around from before when we watched movies. Now I just need to be more aggressive and passionate to get what I want.

Also, I'm going to ponder things to say when she says:

- "I'm not easy"
- "We're not having sex tonight"
- "I know what you want"

 

[Dylan]

Re: FR++ Still not passionate enough

The other thing to remember is that it's better for a girl to resist you and leave because she doesn't want to go to bed with you, than for you not to try as hard as you can to take her to bed in the first place.