Takes Me Too Long To Cum

[Richard]

I'm accustomed to hearing guys complain about cumming way too fast but I seem to have the opposite problem of not being able to cum almost at all. Whenever my gf and I fuck it always feels amazing, and I want to cum but it seldom happens (only 3 times in over 20 sessions) and I'm wondering what the problem is.

I think it's linked to porn and masturbation. My best guess is that I still have a link between watching open and cumming on my own despite having not used open with masturbation in quite a while. Still do it every now and again and don't have a problem cumming so that's more evidence.

If I've indeed become desensitized to physical sex then how do I reverse the problem? I plan on going completely cold turkey on porn and masturbating; how long before the link is broken?

These are my thoughts so far; I'm very open to other opinions and views.

-Richard

Just looking for others experiences on dealing with this if anybody else has.

 

[Richard]

Thanks for the feedback Rad!

I agree the problem is mental and even with my mindfulness and mental control the problem still bugs me. I overloaded my senses and used every trick I know of to cum to no avail.

Really think it's a porn + masturbation problem because I woke up this morning and felt an impulse to grab my phone and dick. I'll give it a few weeks and see how things turn out.

By the way, after you switched to using your imagination over porn did you switch back to porn with no problems?

-Richard

 

[WayOfHand]

Hey guys, I'm relating to this problem as I'm currently suffering from it too. Hard to cum and oftentimes difficult to stay or get hard when using condom. Definitely also consuming too much porn and masturbating.

With one of my girls I'm able to stay hard and cum when running raw. So I'm almost hundred percent sure that for me its a mental as well as little bit a physical problem. Especially Radeng hit the nail for me. Early in the beginning with new girls I'm suffering more acutely from this problem. This I think falls down to me wanting to please the girl as much as possible and setting myself extra pressure. Most of these are hard to identify even when I was consciously trying. They are probably quite deep unconscious reactions...

Also the physical side of masturbating with my hand and doing it quite rough loses me some feeling in actual sex. Also condom greatly diminishes the feeling for me. Also porn makes your brain to link arousal to porn, which cannot be good.

don't worry about her cumming, she probably feels very inadequate about not being able to make you come. Girls love to please you and I've never met a girl who didn't love being cummed on

Yeah this. I've actually lost a girl that couldn't get me to cum. At least this was part of the problem. She mentioned this multiple times and I wasn't experienced enough to know what to answer back then.

Anyways hope we get over this Peace

 

[killerman]

Hey Richard, check out one of my latest posts, we're wondering about the same thing. I have exactly the same problem. But I think I'm getting better. This is because it's been 47 days since I last watched porn and 16 days since I last masturbated. Had sex last week and was able to cum TWICE. In the evening and then the next morning. Though the reason may be because I did it bareback as I've had an issue with condoms. However it's been 6 years since I've been able to ejaculate during sex in back to back session. The second session I came in just 20 minutes. And I think not watching porn or masturbating for this amount of time has been helping me of late as my dick feels a lot more sensitive than before and my orgasms more powerful and pleasurable. Try it out, good chance it will work.

 

[Zoro]

Second you on the porn. I had the same issue with the first girl I slept with. We had an ongoing relationship and fucked probably 15-20 times and I didn't come once. I was watching a lot of porn back then (16 years old).

When I met up with her a year or two later, we had sex again and I felt I was about to come for the first time ever during sex, and I was so excited that I came in 3 seconds. She was very upset. I was estatic.

Cut the porn! Even if Hector comes in here and says otherwise I don't know why it doesn't affect some men like others, but for me it's no good.

My favorite girl I was involved with, I sometimes would watch porn before she came over... Porn and sex are not the same to me. With her it was weird too. Most of the time I felt I could come within 5-10 minutes of fucking (and had to concentrate not to), but if I made it past that time limit, I was unable to come, no matter how long we fucked or jerked me off And she most certainly tried. poor girl must have been very sore. But it was that selfless femininity and willingness to please that made me adore her

Lately sex has been way better with ongoing porn reduction. It actually is less about the coming and more about the whole experience. And I can pretty much come whenever I want, so I love coming together with the girl. After she has already came many times... Must be nice haha