- Joined
- Oct 8, 2015
- Messages
- 508
Hi Girlschase-
Just got back from a date. Met the girl on the school tram two days ago. I had just finished a grueling workout, and was all sweaty and fatigued, but it didn't seem to matter. I got on the tram, girls the furthest thing from my mind, and then we locked eyes at the same time and held it. She was really pretty. 6'0" tall, very in shape, long blonde hair, and beautiful facial features. I sat a seat ahead of her, and after a bit "noticed" her nose ring and commented on it. She was very responsive and we quickly got into animated discussion. Find out that she is a junior, and tell her that I am first-year sophomore transfer student (which is kinda true! I'm a freshman in age but have a lot of college credit already.) She made sure she knew I was getting off where she was (or maybe even just wanted to keep talking to me and pretended to need to get off where I got off
) and from there we started walking together. Once I had to part ways, I told her how cute she was and that I would love to see more of her. Very direct and straightforward. Had her put my number in my phone, told her we can figure out details over text, smiled, said goodbye, and walked away. Even better was that 8 or so of my rowing teammates saw me number close.
Texting was very to the point. Sent an icebreaker text, she responded enthusiastically, and a few hours later I text her to figure out her schedule. We quickly settle on this restaurant near campus for dinner. I am very limited on how I can do dates, since my car is back at home, so am restricted unless I want to uber somewhere.
Sent a confirmation text an hour before, telling her I'm looking forward to seeing her and that I might be a little late. Standard greeting, name, consideration, information. She responds saying she might not look great since she doesn't have time to go home and change, to which I reply: "Just make sure you're wearing something" I throw on a tight crimson vneck from Guess, designer blue jeans, and black Chelseas with matching belt.
Once I get there, I am expecting her to already be there since I am late. Turns out she was, but she was waiting in her car. I eventually check my phone after ordering and have her come in. Give her a big hug and the vibe is very comfortable right away, despite us having only talked for like 5 or less minutes. She tells me she is vegetarian, which pretty much rules out that restaurant, but she isn't hungry, so she ends up not getting anything. I do a pretty good job of eating my food while keeping the conversation flowing and keeping things elegant. I get things rolling right away, have her do a lot of the talking, and tease her before then jumping back into the deep dive. For example, asking if her purity ring is supposed to ward off guys like me after she explained what it was. A few chase frames sprinkled in too (She is explaining why she picked San Diego, and I frame her as picking the city so she can prey upon men with six packs)
Conversation is flowing nicely, though I can tell my deep diving needs work. Chase could blow me out of the water. It's still decent, just not deep enough. I can get further into who a girl is than a lot of people, but Chase can get to their very core with ease. I have some work to do. We're still staring deep into each other's eyes and playing with each other's feet at times. I find out how much she likes travel, is somewhat of a rebel concerning religion while still being somewhat active, has had issues with her mother, and is generally less talkative/ more reserved (though not with me! xD): all things I can strongly relate to.
I maybe could have pulled her 15 minutes in, not sure. The problem was I had really crummy logistics. My roommates/crewmates were using my room, and while as a last resort I could kick them out I wanted to try to get to her place. But as it turned out, she had FIVE ROOMMATES. I mean, C'mon! So her place was probably out. Another problem was that earlier this year I had moved too fast with a string of girls, and while I got them all in my bed I faced massive LMR and was unable to sleep with them all, so I wanted to do the buildup part right. I know Chase will sometimes talk with a girl for an hour or two before they sleep together (I also know he has super quick lays too- but he knows how to calibrate better than I and my current experience level do)
So I instead went for the safer route of moving her, and we walked across the street to get a Jamba Juice, since I figured she probably wanted to consume something. We grab smoothies and sit, but in the transition things go down a notch. Not significantly or anything, just not quite the sparks we had earlier. I want things escalating, not stagnating. She had mentioned earlier that she had this retreat planning session that night, and she ended up telling me after 10 minutes of conversation she had to go to that pretty soon. We keep talking, I try to ramp things up a bit, but unsuccessfully. After a bit she says that she has to leave. I try a hard push to get her up to my balcony, but it needs work and is unsuccessful. She tells me that it's ok and that we've only just met and have a lot of time to hang out in the future. She drives me back to the dorm. Things weren't awkward, and we agree to see each other soon for a movie or something. Give her another big hug and away I go.
So... never is fun to not get together on the first date, especially with such a looker who was into me from the start. Less experienced guys who don't know what I mean: no matter how great a date goes, your odds of eventually getting the girl (sleeping with her) go down each date you don't get together with her. Something I and many guys on this forum can agonizingly attest to. I guess I can take solace in the fact that both of our logistics were trash, she had a legitimate time constraint, and that this experience will form part of the mountain I build my eventual successes upon. I guess I could call this an informational date, although I did try and fail to escalate things.
So date compression, here I come! Never have consciously done this before; back in high school I really took to the mantra of moving fast, and if a girl and I didn't get together right away I'd forget about her, or it would take forever to see her again (second dates weren't a strong suit of mine, though I did make them work, just with a lot of effort). Soon as I finish writing this I am going over two DC forum posts with contributions from NarrowJ, Franco, and Anatman, and of course will be rereading Chase's Having Lots of Dates in Short Amounts of Time. I'm like TB enough that I want to go this route, plus I am excited to try the technique
Takeaways- Since I came to college I have taken my Approaching and Closing Game to much higher ascents. Now, I have to work on my Interest Game! Which is pretty baffling since up until now I was always better on the date than at the approach or leading to intimacy. My deep dive needs work. I am used to dealing with girls my age and younger, and need to adjust to girls older than me. Also, I hate admitting it but I wasn't sexual or dangerous enough. Sure I was witty and teased her and touched her, but I am not on the level I want to be on. I need to work on creating and using tension some more. I also need to be more of a Lover. God, an aspiring seducer gets no reprieve! Always something more to adjust and tweak. My hard push needs work too. LOL kill me haha
Would love to hear your thoughts and criticisms. Am very much in evaluate and assess mode, and am extremely open to suggestions. Rereading this I am less disappointed and really don't see how things could have gone better. Maybe I could have had her meet up with me later? Although it is a school night, and my logistics and hers will probably be even worse later tonight... I really want to figure out a way for me to win, but I guess maybe that is by setting up for next time. It very well might be good that things didn't escalate too much or her emotions might have crested. We'll see. Thanks for reading I'm going to go read that article and those posts, and then go meet some more girls! My thirst is getting stronger...
-A
Just got back from a date. Met the girl on the school tram two days ago. I had just finished a grueling workout, and was all sweaty and fatigued, but it didn't seem to matter. I got on the tram, girls the furthest thing from my mind, and then we locked eyes at the same time and held it. She was really pretty. 6'0" tall, very in shape, long blonde hair, and beautiful facial features. I sat a seat ahead of her, and after a bit "noticed" her nose ring and commented on it. She was very responsive and we quickly got into animated discussion. Find out that she is a junior, and tell her that I am first-year sophomore transfer student (which is kinda true! I'm a freshman in age but have a lot of college credit already.) She made sure she knew I was getting off where she was (or maybe even just wanted to keep talking to me and pretended to need to get off where I got off
) and from there we started walking together. Once I had to part ways, I told her how cute she was and that I would love to see more of her. Very direct and straightforward. Had her put my number in my phone, told her we can figure out details over text, smiled, said goodbye, and walked away. Even better was that 8 or so of my rowing teammates saw me number close.Texting was very to the point. Sent an icebreaker text, she responded enthusiastically, and a few hours later I text her to figure out her schedule. We quickly settle on this restaurant near campus for dinner. I am very limited on how I can do dates, since my car is back at home, so am restricted unless I want to uber somewhere.
Sent a confirmation text an hour before, telling her I'm looking forward to seeing her and that I might be a little late. Standard greeting, name, consideration, information. She responds saying she might not look great since she doesn't have time to go home and change, to which I reply: "Just make sure you're wearing something
" I throw on a tight crimson vneck from Guess, designer blue jeans, and black Chelseas with matching belt.Once I get there, I am expecting her to already be there since I am late. Turns out she was, but she was waiting in her car. I eventually check my phone after ordering and have her come in. Give her a big hug and the vibe is very comfortable right away, despite us having only talked for like 5 or less minutes. She tells me she is vegetarian, which pretty much rules out that restaurant, but she isn't hungry, so she ends up not getting anything. I do a pretty good job of eating my food while keeping the conversation flowing and keeping things elegant. I get things rolling right away, have her do a lot of the talking, and tease her before then jumping back into the deep dive. For example, asking if her purity ring is supposed to ward off guys like me after she explained what it was. A few chase frames sprinkled in too (She is explaining why she picked San Diego, and I frame her as picking the city so she can prey upon men with six packs)
Conversation is flowing nicely, though I can tell my deep diving needs work. Chase could blow me out of the water. It's still decent, just not deep enough. I can get further into who a girl is than a lot of people, but Chase can get to their very core with ease. I have some work to do. We're still staring deep into each other's eyes and playing with each other's feet at times. I find out how much she likes travel, is somewhat of a rebel concerning religion while still being somewhat active, has had issues with her mother, and is generally less talkative/ more reserved (though not with me! xD): all things I can strongly relate to.
I maybe could have pulled her 15 minutes in, not sure. The problem was I had really crummy logistics. My roommates/crewmates were using my room, and while as a last resort I could kick them out I wanted to try to get to her place. But as it turned out, she had FIVE ROOMMATES. I mean, C'mon! So her place was probably out. Another problem was that earlier this year I had moved too fast with a string of girls, and while I got them all in my bed I faced massive LMR and was unable to sleep with them all, so I wanted to do the buildup part right. I know Chase will sometimes talk with a girl for an hour or two before they sleep together (I also know he has super quick lays too- but he knows how to calibrate better than I and my current experience level do)
So I instead went for the safer route of moving her, and we walked across the street to get a Jamba Juice, since I figured she probably wanted to consume something. We grab smoothies and sit, but in the transition things go down a notch. Not significantly or anything, just not quite the sparks we had earlier. I want things escalating, not stagnating. She had mentioned earlier that she had this retreat planning session that night, and she ended up telling me after 10 minutes of conversation she had to go to that pretty soon. We keep talking, I try to ramp things up a bit, but unsuccessfully. After a bit she says that she has to leave. I try a hard push to get her up to my balcony, but it needs work and is unsuccessful. She tells me that it's ok and that we've only just met and have a lot of time to hang out in the future. She drives me back to the dorm. Things weren't awkward, and we agree to see each other soon for a movie or something. Give her another big hug and away I go.
So... never is fun to not get together on the first date, especially with such a looker who was into me from the start. Less experienced guys who don't know what I mean: no matter how great a date goes, your odds of eventually getting the girl (sleeping with her) go down each date you don't get together with her. Something I and many guys on this forum can agonizingly attest to. I guess I can take solace in the fact that both of our logistics were trash, she had a legitimate time constraint, and that this experience will form part of the mountain I build my eventual successes upon. I guess I could call this an informational date, although I did try and fail to escalate things.
So date compression, here I come! Never have consciously done this before; back in high school I really took to the mantra of moving fast, and if a girl and I didn't get together right away I'd forget about her, or it would take forever to see her again (second dates weren't a strong suit of mine, though I did make them work, just with a lot of effort). Soon as I finish writing this I am going over two DC forum posts with contributions from NarrowJ, Franco, and Anatman, and of course will be rereading Chase's Having Lots of Dates in Short Amounts of Time. I'm like TB enough that I want to go this route, plus I am excited to try the technique
Takeaways- Since I came to college I have taken my Approaching and Closing Game to much higher ascents. Now, I have to work on my Interest Game! Which is pretty baffling since up until now I was always better on the date than at the approach or leading to intimacy. My deep dive needs work. I am used to dealing with girls my age and younger, and need to adjust to girls older than me. Also, I hate admitting it but I wasn't sexual or dangerous enough. Sure I was witty and teased her and touched her, but I am not on the level I want to be on. I need to work on creating and using tension some more. I also need to be more of a Lover. God, an aspiring seducer gets no reprieve! Always something more to adjust and tweak. My hard push needs work too. LOL kill me haha
Would love to hear your thoughts and criticisms. Am very much in evaluate and assess mode, and am extremely open to suggestions. Rereading this I am less disappointed and really don't see how things could have gone better. Maybe I could have had her meet up with me later? Although it is a school night, and my logistics and hers will probably be even worse later tonight... I really want to figure out a way for me to win, but I guess maybe that is by setting up for next time. It very well might be good that things didn't escalate too much or her emotions might have crested. We'll see. Thanks for reading
I'm going to go read that article and those posts, and then go meet some more girls! My thirst is getting stronger...-A
