The "3 sec rule" approach invitation

[metalbird]

I've been seeing a lot of stuff lately about the "three second rule" as the biggest approach invitation -- where if a girl looks at you for more than 3 seconds, that means she's interested.

I don't doubt that if a girl stares at you for that long, she's interested, but how often does that really happen? I can't think of any times in my life where I an attractive girl stared at me for more than 3 seconds. That seems like a really long time. even women who I know were super into me, that later approached me and asked me out, I still don't remember them ever staring at me or anything like that.

I'm trying to understand the concept of approach invitations better, it's not something that I've ever really incorporated into my approach towards women. It seems like it's something that less attractive women use maybe, but from my experience highly attractive women don't do that stuff. Or maybe I'm just not attractive enough to get approach invitations from attractive women. But I've still successfully asked and dated such women, even without "approach invitations".

even in social settings, I feel like I can tell if a woman is interested in me because she'll try to talk to me. I can always tell because they'll try to get me alone, have a conversation with me, touch me on the arm, etc. But I've never seen them just stare at me from across the room. Am I missing something?

 

[Skills]

I've been seeing a lot of stuff lately about the "three second rule" as the biggest approach invitation --

i edited the post, i previously wrote none sense then thought about it, cost 3 seconds is not much, is just a quick glance, and yes women will look and then look away right away.... Take a look at this please

and this one from illuminatus.

 

[Derek da man]

I'm not sure I'd go as far as "3 second" rule but certainly girls/ladies of all ages use a slightly prolonged eye contact to advertise interest. It's up to you what you do with it. You may use it as an invitation to approach, use it to eye flirt across the room, or hold back and see if she's got the confidence to approach you.

I still don't remember them ever staring at me or anything like that.

I think most girls are much more subtle than that, men are quite the opposite and tend to stare. They keep the look fairly short but it is definitely there.

There is a lot of evidence regarding eye contact and how to interpret it, particularly if she looks down or to the side after holding your gaze for a second or so. If, after breaking your gaze, she then looks back within 45 seconds (based on study evidence) then she is definitely interested in you approaching and she wasn't just looking at you with mild interest in what she was seeing but no interest in further contact. In my experience most women struggle to make 10 seconds, never mind 45 seconds. The longer she makes it the more confident and socially calibrated she is.

If women are coming and talking to you then you've probably got your fundamentals sorted (reasonable cloths, good hair cut, tidy/trimmed beard, deodorant, etc). Women do not rate men in the same way men look at women. Most look for emotional connection and providing you don't rule yourself out with poor fundamentals you'll do fine.

I used to waste a lot of time and emotion deciding which girl to go and chat to and then suffer rejections. Now, due to experience, I wait to see which girls give off approach invitations and generally only make cold approached to them. There may only be a few but at least they are interested and I'm not wasting my time and effort. Some people refer to this as the traffic light system but it's my variation of it. Equally I pick up a fair number of opportunities from my social circle of ladies that I know. They all seem to like to play match maker and introduce me to their friends.

 

[metalbird]

Hmm, so I guess it's important to distinguish between "looking at someone" vs making eye contact. Now I'm not sure which is more applicable here. I know sometimes I've noticed women looking at me when they think I don't notice, especially when they're with their boyfriends, but they almost always look away immediately if I look back. However, I don't think that's any sign of interest, I'm pretty sure everybody does that.

Holding eye contact is a different story. Women rarely hold eye contact with me at all, and if they do, it's always when they're with their boyfriends or families and feel comfortable that they're unapproachable in the given situation. However, I have some thoughts about this I want to play around with. I'll try a few things and see what I come up with.

 

[hotsauce]

It seems like it's something that less attractive women use maybe, but from my experience highly attractive women don't do that stuff. Or maybe I'm just not attractive enough to get approach invitations from attractive women.

i don't think less attractive women use approach invitations unless they'r like creep-staring or super direct approaches. they don't have the confidence that attractive women have to pull off the mouth watering invitations. a really attractive girl knows she can get the guy to approach with just her looks if she just gives him a litle nudge and if he doesn't approach disregard him. less attractive women can't do this.

 

[BigPapa]

i don't think less attractive women use approach invitations unless they'r like creep-staring or super direct approaches. they don't have the confidence that attractive women have to pull off the mouth watering invitations. a really attractive girl knows she can get the guy to approach with just her looks if she just gives him a litle nudge and if he doesn't approach disregard him. less attractive women can't do this.

Depends on how attainable she perceives you

If a hot women finds you for some reason with a low attainability , then she will try to mask her interest as much as possible till she is not sure that you like her back . Same thing when it comes to ugly women

Sometimes you still get this stares from women , because well they like you so much that they can not take their eyes from you

 

[hotsauce]

[

Depends on how attainable she perceives you

If a hot women finds you for some reason with a low attainability , then she will try to mask her interest as much as possible till she is not sure that you like her back . Same thing when it comes to ugly women

how can a girl 'mask their interest' if they are complying?

ugly women can't afford to mask their interest lol

 

[BigPapa]

how can a girl 'mask their interest' if they are complying?

I do not think it was about a particular case in which you are talking with the girl already and stuff like that the discussion till now .

But even in your example , it never happened to you to talk with a girl and never really had an idea that she liked you ? It happens a lot to me in social circles , where I am not even paying attention to people and just talk some things and then move on talking to other ones and so on . This is just me being socially gracious .

But to be frank ,after I talked with her already then she will just start giving me approach invitations and make strong eye contact , because she does not really perceives me with a low attainability since I already talked with her previously .

 

[Tr1cky]

Where did you read about this 3 second rule? In traditional pua the 3 second rule meant when entering a venue you make an approach within the first 3 seconds. This was designed to help prevent guys from getting into their own heads and wandering around the venue lowering their state.

 

[Glow]

I've been seeing a lot of stuff lately about the "three second rule" as the biggest approach invitation -- where if a girl looks at you for more than 3 seconds, that means she's interested.

I don't doubt that if a girl stares at you for that long, she's interested, but how often does that really happen? I can't think of any times in my life where I an attractive girl stared at me for more than 3 seconds. That seems like a really long time. even women who I know were super into me, that later approached me and asked me out, I still don't remember them ever staring at me or anything like that.

I'm trying to understand the concept of approach invitations better, it's not something that I've ever really incorporated into my approach towards women. It seems like it's something that less attractive women use maybe, but from my experience highly attractive women don't do that stuff. Or maybe I'm just not attractive enough to get approach invitations from attractive women. But I've still successfully asked and dated such women, even without "approach invitations".

even in social settings, I feel like I can tell if a woman is interested in me because she'll try to talk to me. I can always tell because they'll try to get me alone, have a conversation with me, touch me on the arm, etc. But I've never seen them just stare at me from across the room. Am I missing something?

I would not look for specific rules for girls interest in you - they vary their glares and there are so many nuances of this. take what you see more as a hint of something more... when you see it. follow that.

The more typical move if shes initially attracted is a peripheral sorta seeing of you which you can sense and read in her movement in relation to your position. Or a quick glance. dont put much in it though, often its fragile unless you work it right.

with training you can make girls look at you longer cause youve trained the elements that activate it and know what turns them on, vs what attracts them. And its not a straight science.

if you can use appearance in its broader sense which is a higher level of fundamentals - you can make them look longer, and more.. even perv at you cause you trigger things in her that captivates her.

I would see iois, ais, even overcompensations just as little pointers in the abyss of female reaction.

im more interested in the degrees of each. The depth and nuance of them.

iois and ais for example vary in their intensity and how clearly shell make a move. This tells you a lot about where she is in her state and her sexual activation.

sorry - advanced stuff. but gives you a peak of things.

Where did you read about this 3 second rule? In traditional pua the 3 second rule meant when entering a venue you make an approach within the first 3 seconds. This was designed to help prevent guys from getting into their own heads and wandering around the venue lowering their state.

+1

The 3-second rule is a guideline that many guys into Game use when they see an attractive girl. It simply means that upon seeing that girl, they have 3 seconds with which to open and interact with her. The main reason for the existence of this rule is to get you to approach quickly. Often times, a guy will see a girl he is attracted to but will hesitate and delay going over to talk to her for fear, shyness or nervousness.​

https://puamore.com/wiki/3-second-rule/

 

[BigPapa]

iois and ais for example vary in their intensity and how clearly shell make a move. This tells you a lot about where she is in her state and her sexual activation.

Does this tells also something about how sexual experienced she is ?