I'm a little worried about how some of us "confident" guys who are striving to be leaders, or the best we can be could quite easily teeter into the cult leader label if we polished certain soft skills enough. Actually, thinking out loud, it seems a combination of mastering soft skills and understanding various aspects of human study seem to be core requirements.
The term 'cult leader' is mostly just a label for people to apply to things they don't really understand and are afraid of.
The way I see it, it's unethical to be destructive as opposed to constructive. The test of constructivity is functionality. Bad people cause disfunctionality and destruction, while good people build up the people and places they go. That's the litmus test.
There are a lot of people who are the furthest thing from 'cult leaders' who consider themselves highly moral, whose fearful influence does nothing but stick a spanner in the gears of people trying to reach their potential, fragmenting their identity and setting each part of their self against another. This is far worse and more common than any charismatic lunatic, and at least as destructive.
Life waits for no one. Everything lies on the other side of the force of a man's will, and most men need a figure to show them what they could be. The number of lives that were wasted in fear and hesitation will always eclipse those burned out too quickly in trying to reach for too much, and the numbers are always growing.
I was fortunate enough to have a father that many would consider far too demanding and controlling, but it made me exceptional. I intend to do the same for the next generation. When I look around all I see are people suffering from a lack of the kind of identity that a good leader builds in them, hesitant and unwilling to commit to life, accepting the fear of others as their own. Too many people are afraid of what they might become or encounter when they haven't even left the starting line. Women have no time for such men, and opportunities don't take pity on them.
When I see all the depression and neediness that is rampant in the world today, I realise that people were build with potential they cannot readily access themselves. Everyone is part of an ecosystem, made up of other people and the challenges of life, that should have forced them to connect with that potential. But this ecosystem is broken, and is being replaced by a safety net that will end up holding nothing but misery.
The hardest battle a man fights is the one in his head about what he will do and be, for which there are no clear answers. But since judgement comes anyway, and possibly the worst pain comes from doing nothing, a man needs to be somewhat fatalistic and act before he is sure he is ready.
And that is true not just for becoming what he needs to be for himself, but for others as well.