The Shoes Off Rule?

[Rage]

Was wondering how many of you guys employ the "shoes off at the door" rule?

How does it work for you guys with different girls (are some girls up for it and others not as much)?

If you do it why do you like it; and if you don’t do it why not?

I’m less than 2 months into my own place and haven’t implemented or tried this rule yet, but I just used my friends vacuum and found that it works well so I’m thinking of maybe using this rule (now that I can finally get my freaking carpet clean lol).

Curious what others have to say,

-Gem

 

[Franco]

Gem,

I use it every time. If you have a shoe rack next to your door with a handful of shoes on it, it'll likely be easy to get her to do it since it obviously looks like a policy of yours for entering the apartment/house/dorm/etc. I've never taken a girl back and had her decline once she sees me remove my shoes, put them on the rack, and then ask her to do so.

For the most part, it's not necessarily going to be a deal-breaker for you, but it just seems to help move things along more smoothly and transitions her more easily into getting comfortable and sitting down somewhere that you can escalate with her.

- Franco

 

[Rage]

Hey thanks Franco that sounds great,

Currently I have all my shoes off to one to side but you can’t see them unless you walk more in (by which point if the rule were being enforced her shoes would have already been off).

But if I were to take them off at the door each time could communicate that in that way for her to do the same…

Think I might start trying that; only thing that bugs me is my feet getting dirty from carpet not getting vacuumed well enough (but if it makes things way easier for me it may be one of those things where I have to tell myself “stop being a pansy and just start doing it” lol).

-Gem  

 

[Grand Pooba]

I use it every time. If you have a shoe rack next to your door with a handful of shoes on it, it'll likely be easy to get her to do it since it obviously looks like a policy of yours for entering the apartment/house/dorm/etc. I've never taken a girl back and had her decline once she sees me remove my shoes, put them on the rack, and then ask her to do so.

This works well for me too.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Yeah I usually forget until I get back in my room in which I simply transition "oh yeah shoes off! I always forget! My roommate can't have shoes on the carpet"

She has no choice she can either leave or take her shoes off.... along with her panties

-Rob

 

[luego]

Is this just an American thing? I'm Canadian, and I couldn't imagine ever wearing my outdoor shoes into anyone's house, or having them do the same in mine. It's not even a discussion point.

 

[ray_zorse]

British, American, Australian and AFAIK New Zealand culture are in agreement that it's acceptable to wear outdoor shoes ibto the home. I think it may be partly a temperature thing -- we walk in & out of doors hundreds of times a day (light the barbecue... go inside to get a beer... etc) so it would be a huge hassle to put shoes on and off every time. The floors are also not kept as clean as in a European or Asian house (in fact a typical British residence had dirt floors until the Middle Ages and washing ne's body was considered a risk to one's health)... so it is no big deal if a little dirt gets in, after all everyone is protected from it by their shoes.

I do basically run a shoes-off household, influenced by my time in Japan and Poland, but (1) I wouldn't ask superiors such as my grandmother or my parents to take shoes off, because it would be rude in our culture, I would just clean again after they go, (2) the rules are relaxed when I haven't cleaned in a bit or I'm the only one home... if I had a girl over right now I wouldn't ask her to take her shoes off cos the floors are filthy (I was moving furniture around, stashing stuff in boxes, putting party lights up etc, big improvement but I have not had a chance to clean properly since then, an all too common occurrence).

However I've gone to considerable effort to implement a shoe rack as Franco mentioned, with space for each of my kids and for my own shoe collection, and plan to use it for compliance- and comfort-building as recommended here.

Another thing that might work for building extra compliance is to have some slippers of a girly size and design and have her wear them whilst in your house. Also it's normal in JP homes to have separate slippers for the bathroom and Crocs for the outside or balcony, and I have been trying to buy these for some time.

-Ray

 

[luego]

Interesting that you mention both American and British (and Canada's usually portrayed as a hybrid). Not sure about climate reasoning though... I'm sure North Dakota and the like have similar climates to much of Canada. Here, it's *marginally* ok, in some circumstances (ie going back into get a beer after being on the deck in the summer), especially if you're dealing with hardwood floor or laminates. But outdoor shoes, on carpet, or up on an ottoman/couch...? Never.

 

[ray_zorse]

Outdoor shoes on carpet is okay here, but not usually on an ottoman or couch. The idea is the dirt actually stays on the floor -- not so silly when you think about it -- although typically Asian or European will just assume we are dirty and don't care full stop. In truth it's not that one system is better or worse, they are just different conventions that work equally well provided an internally consistent set of rules is followed. Having said that, running a "shoes off" household can be perceived as kind of classy or exotic here, and is also useful in seduction for compliance-, comfort- and investment-building.
-Ray

 

[Thedoctor]

Is this just an American thing? I'm Canadian, and I couldn't imagine ever wearing my outdoor shoes into anyone's house, or having them do the same in mine. It's not even a discussion point.

Yeah, I've always found it strange to see Americans do this. Nicer climate or not, this just seems extremely unhygienic. From a cultural standpoint, where I live it's basically the equivalent of spitting on someone's floor.

My guess is that if you're in a place where wearing your shoes is acceptable, you can just chalk it up to being more well traveled if she gives you a really strange look.

-John