The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Objections

[Big Daddy]

Hey gents, quickie.

I've got the "you may be a serial killer" a couple of times when inviting girls home. Some are really easy to brush off and run thru it (just ignore, joke ironically) while others will give me all kinds of shit while giving some other IOIs that they are into me, which just happened.

One girl just suggested she came to my apartment lobby to chat as opposed to eating b/c she as short on time and in my head I was "lol yeah we can fuck."

Note: first date had to be cut short because she had something else to do before and that caught me off guard. I had her drive me home at least for investment and to see where I lived to make the pull easier on the second time.

When she texted me saying she was close I said I had talked to the security guy already and she could come up. She texts me saying she's downstairs and if I could go down there because I might be a serial killer... "priorities." Throws me off balance, but sure, no prob. After some 5 minutes of talking I invited her to go a video I had mentioned on our first date. She says she really has to go soon and make jokes about me using a mini-swiss-knife as my keychain, etc even though I don't have tattoos and am very composed.

Some touches going on but no kiss. She's looking all the time at my mouth tho. I walk her to the door when she has to go and she gives me a hard(er) hug and hold my hand for a while and say "let's see each other again." I'm like, sure, we'll figure it out. Still no kiss.

I've been talking to some naturals and they aren't hell bent on NECESSARILY fucking them asap. They told me they invite a girl home, if she comes, nice, if she doesn't whatever. Just keep trying every time and by the 3-4th time or so they probably will if they like you. I probably am doing a very poor job creating attraction and sexual tension (in fact it's probably my main problem right now, though girls certainly view me as sexually liberated from the get go) but I also don't get the impression that have Alek-level sexual game. They try to hook up with them when they get the chance tho, even if not in sex location.

I've been debating if I should just go balls to the walls inviting her home in our next date or let her decide for herself that she's comfortable enough to come. Insisting seems desperate and maintaining the rule to not kiss until clear chance of sex feels like a pussy if I'm really going until the 4th date or so (which is my limit for sex).

 

[mindful]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

I've never had a girl persist with that line after saying it just once.

I think it comes from younger girls who are not used to fast sex with random guys they don't know, although they are sexually attracted and it's just a light test to see how you react. I've only ever gotten this from younger girls. But yeah, you want to push forward but acknowledge it in a playful way then change the topics.

 

[Richard]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Yeah, objections like this usually occur because she isn't totally comfortable with you OR she's had some bad experiences and is less-than-trusting unless you do a superb job of building up rapport and comfort - I used to suffer from the latter problem because I'm around a lot of poverty and SES affects personality, etc. Long story short is that the girls I'm around tend to be less-than-trusting on average, compared to the higher status/quality areas I've run game in.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. Generally, I'm a lot more calibrated in determining how comfortable a girl is with me so I don't run in to this too much but when I was running in to it I would usually joke:

Her: "I don't know, you might be a serial killer."
Me: "Really? Well, that depends, how many people do you have to kill for it to be serial?"
Her: <throws out some number>
Me: "Oh no, we're all good here, then!" <-- Laugh and smile to ease tension

That being said, if a girl is adamant in her objection to coming to your place then play it cool - if you overreact with anger or disappointment she's going to pick up on it and, likely, toss your number aside. Your natural friends were pretty spot on with their advice; you shouldn't ever expect a girl to come to your place, if she does, it should be a pleasant surprise. If she doesn't want to come to your place then you play it cool and invite her on the next date.

Plus, if she understands that you're legitimately cool with her not coming to your place then the chances that she DOES go to your place on the next date increases exponentially! If she isn't willing to come to your place by the 3rd date (or if she doesn't offer other consolation ) then I'll usually slow down on my investment or outright stop investing my time and energy - some girls have gotten really worried about why I'm suddenly more "scarce" and they realize why so the next date I fuck them pretty easily with minimal resistance.

-Richard

EDIT: I put up an LR a while back (that I've since asked to be taken down) where I ran into a situation where I jokingly said something about not being a thief (after using my friend's place in Chicago to bring her to. Was a reference to him leaving money/sunglasses on the table that could be stolen easily) and she said "I hope you're not a thief, otherwise you had me fooled:" something along those lines. Anyway, Chase quoted that bit and explained to me how that meant I hadn't full established rapport/comfort with her, yet, because jokes like that (and the serial killer one) take some skepticism of your character to come up with, even if they're jokes.

 

[Hue]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Richard,

Her: "I don't know, you might be a serial killer."
Me: "Really? Well, that depends, how many people do you have to kill for it to be serial?"
Her: <throws out some number>
Me: "Oh no, we're all good here, then!" <-- Laugh and smile to ease tension

Love it. Tension can be raised with asking her home + the objection, and you address the "objection" in a playful way that eases the tone.

I put up an LR a while back (that I've since asked to be taken down)

I remember reading this one - multiple times actually. I hope you don't mind me asking, why did you remove all of your LR's?

 

[Richard]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Hue,

Yeah, I asked Franco to take them down because I had some suspicions that my personal social circle was finding them. If you search my name on Google some GirlsChase stuff will come up and I know that a few of my friends (two girls, for sure) were Googling me because they'd bring up things and find things that I'd forgotten about.

There's a video of me playing pool on a University twitter page, for instance. So, I asked them to be taken down but I still have them all in a .PDF file!

-Richard

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Hey folks,

Thanks for the quick replies.

I should mention that I'm not on the safest city around so I understand the skepticism – I'm skeptical myself, but there are a couple of screening tests that make it easy to push forward as per Blackdragon's 2% Rule. If she goes to college and has a stable family situation I'd say there's a pretty good chance she's not trying to get impregnated just to get monthly greens from me so I'd expect the same from her.

Yeah, objections like this usually occur because she isn't totally comfortable with you OR she's had some bad experiences and is less-than-trusting unless you do a superb job of building up rapport and comfort - I used to suffer from the latter problem because I'm around a lot of poverty and SES affects personality, etc.

I was under the impression that I'm running extremely subpar sexual/touch game and she's not attracted enough to want to fuck asap and forego her silly reasoning and more comfort-building.

I can't seem to be as sexual as I'd like with a girl until she shows me that she welcomes it (a lot); and I say that having fucked the cutest girl ever in the ass one hour after meeting her – her best friend even asked me if she sucked my dick afterwards because she was dying of curiosity if she's "that type of girl" for you to have an idea of her cuteness.

So it doesn't come from a flawed scarce mindset, I know for a fact that girls like sex. I just don't know if this girl, at the time, likes it. If I'm talking to a girl, I feel like she might feel like I'm a creeper putting my hands on her waist 5 minutes on conversation. Basically I'm the one feeling judged on this shit lol Once I get a feeling they welcome it I'm all over them – that can happen in 5 minute or 3 dates.

But yeah, I feel like I may also me missing on the comfort part indeed. How did/do you solve this all?

That being said, if a girl is adamant in her objection to coming to your place then play it cool - if you overreact with anger or disappointment she's going to pick up on it and, likely, toss your number aside.

Plus, if she understands that you're legitimately cool with her not coming to your place then the chances that she DOES go to your place on the next date increases exponentially! If she isn't willing to come to your place by the 3rd date (or if she doesn't offer other consolation ) then I'll usually slow down on my investment or outright stop investing my time and energy - some girls have gotten really worried about why I'm suddenly more "scarce" and they realize why so the next date I fuck them pretty easily with minimal resistance.

Right, noted. Would you refrain from kissing her if the only opportunity wasn't on sex location though? Kissing her, unless it was in my bed, was never on my mind today and as such I think I have acted differently than otherwise. I probably would've touched her more and had an opportunity to kiss her maybe once or twice but didn't.

I'm trying to keep it on the shorter side of course but I wanted to see how this unfolds if I'm a little bit more patient. But under that perspective not attempting even a kiss sounds so lame for her.

 

[Sandman]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Great discussion I must say!

I come across this online a few times but I can't remember if I ever encountered in real life. I usually flip the table on them and joke "how do I know you're not one? I'll text my friend where I am just in case." or something similar depending on the conversation. I agree that joking in a way that suggest you might be a killer might make her associate that image with you. Same way chase frames work. You might think it's self deprecating and cool and she might laugh but it might still make her feel a bit off about you. Better not to go through that route.

And I think you reeling in the sexuality might be because you have too much empathy. I think you should learn to dial it down. I am a very emphatic person as well but I figured I will not see this girl again so why not be aggresive and see where it leads. Nowadays the thought doesn't even occur to me that she might repulse my advances. Of course if she does I take a step back and think that she just needs more time to build comfort. I have a very aggresive style though maybe you have a more aloof, mysterious style as was discussed in Chase's recent article?

For kissing, I absolutely agree that kissing releases sexual tension and should not be done before sex (learned from painful experiences not just articles haha). BUT I had sex with some girls that I kissed, even made out heavily with, on the second date. So I think it's not a rule set in stone. But I rarely get second dates (I think mostly because my aggresive style scares them off if I don't close on the first date i.e. I jump the gun). So I might not be qualified to give advice regarding situations involving multiple dates. But what I might have done in the scenario you discuss (as it seems like she was expecting a kiss by looking at your mouth), give her a sweet and quick kiss and a wink and show her off in a chill way (see you later kiddo).

 

[lostnumber]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

There is a solution that I've come up with to this. Not going to claim this is perfect or will work in every situation, but it's what I'm currently doing and I have a 100% success rate with it.

The way I came up with this is actually because I was on a date with a girl I wasn't super into, and I was planning on just walking back to my place and saying goodbye. Hadn't asked her to move with me, didn't plan on inviting her in or anything just said we should grab the check. This girl followed me all the way to my apartment. Spur of the moment I decided to see what would happen if I simply walked inside without saying anything. Sure enough, she followed me in. We made out a little and didn't hook up (like I said, my heart wasn't in it) but it got me thinking... What if I tried this on girls I actually DID want to sleep with?

Now days when I think a girl is ready for a pull, I suggest to her that we grab a change of scenery. When she says yes I simply walk her back to my place. I dont ask her if she wants to come in, I dont try and make up a plausible deniability excuse (watch a video) or anything like that. As we are walking I make sure we get into a fun deep topic, preferably with her telling me a story about something so she is using a lot of her brainpower, and I walk up to my front door and into my building. Some girls will follow you like it's the most natural thing in the world. Other girls will have a visible moment of "oh shit, we're at his place, do I want to go in? Too late, I guess this is happening" Almost without fail though they will follow you in!

If they say something I make some quip about the drinks being cheap and the bartender being super hot. I've used this method at least a dozen times at this point and it literally works every time. I've had exactly ONE bad experience with an Indian girl who freaked out and called an uber when she realized we were going to my place and not another bar like she had thought (and she still followed me inside despite this!)

I also had one girl, the one I'm currently dating and getting serious with, start visibly freaking out as we walked towards my place because she recognized where we were going. On the fly I said "Hey, are you ok? The park we are going to us just a little bit further" and walked her to the park instead. I'm sure you could use a similar plan B if a girl freaked out once inside the building: "Don't worry, I'm just grabbing something from my place, then we'll walk to the bar we're going to"

The method overcomes objections by not even giving them time to form. By the time a girl realizes that she is being pulled you are walking in the doorway. At that point the path of least resistance by a bazillion light years is to follow you in. What is she going to do, abruptly cut off what has been an amazing social interaction without any thought or planning? I can tell you from experience it just doesn't happen, assuming you had a great date and there is attraction. Her defensive perimeter changes from "I won't go home with this guy on the first date to: I won't sleep with this guy on the first date"

Also you gave her a chance to voice REAL objections already. If she didn't like you enough to spend more time with you she wouldn't agree to a change of scenery. If she really HAS to be somewhere else that will come up when you ask her to move, and at that point you have the opportunity to either overcome the objection or gracefully accept before ever starting your pull and entering into "failed mating attempt territory"

The biggest downside though is you really need proper logistics to make this work. I live in real cool area near bars and can have girls meet me at my place to walk places. If it takes a 20 minute drive to get from the date to your place you won't be able to use this method. At that point my advice becomes: get better logistics! It really does make a MASSIVE difference

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Hey folks, I didn't read anything since my last post as I'm short on time; will do later.

Just came to throw this in: building on top of what I asked about comfort in the post where I quoted Richard, should I ever get logical about why there is no chance I'm a killer?

She's into the "suspicious" group of girls and unless I manage to get her brainwashedly wet, I feel like she's gonna throw that at me when I try to pull. Also she'll be driving most likely so it'll be impossible to just get up and go. I guess I have no ideia on how to persist in high "points" like this.

 

[Regal Tiger]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Her: "I don't know, you might be a serial killer."
Me: "Really? Well, that depends, how many people do you have to kill for it to be serial?"
Her: <throws out some number>
Me: "Oh no, we're all good here, then!" <-- Laugh and smile to ease tension

Haha I actually lol'ed at that. It's close to what I say:
Her: Serial killer comment

Me: Only on Monday (Friday if it actually is on a Monday) morning traffic [edit] wanna also mention that I say this in way that's hard to describe but makes it obvious that I'm joking[/edit]


Also keep in mind that I'm goofy anyways so these responses work for my character. My responses also assume that she isn't asking that in a creeped out way but is asking in a flirty-testy kinda way. Haven't gotten the serious questions since my beginning months so I'm assuming it was a comfort problem that killed the interaction for me as I never could salvage those.

EDIT: This also reminds me of one of my favorite things to say when I'm being accused of something like 'are you flirting with me?' or 'you wish you could have me' or whatever else that's a flirty-test that's accusatory:

Who, me? I would neeeeeeeeeever *loud whisper-yell of 'get caught'*. Lots of voice inflections though to make it obvious that I'm joking


EDIT 2: I'm still struggling with how to explain how I say stuff like this. There's a lot of voice inflection, emphasis on a certain word and just general a little over-the-top-ness. But again, I find it hilarious and it resonates with women that like that part about me and I've not had any issues with using stuff like this. But I'm also a little direct and aggressive which is, in my mind, a nice contrast

 

[Regal Tiger]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Just came to throw this in: building on top of what I asked about comfort in the post where I quoted Richard, should I ever get logical about why there is no chance I'm a killer?

God no. Making it serious gives it too much weight, makes it real. Any sincere 'No, I'm not a serial killer' has never worked for me when they seemed a little nervous. Joking is always the right answer for me and it's the only way I've ever gotten it to work.

Treat it as a test and laugh it off.


Though I'm curious about what others will say about it

 

[lostnumber]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Hey folks, I didn't read anything since my last post as I'm short on time; will do later.

Just came to throw this in: building on top of what I asked about comfort in the post where I quoted Richard, should I ever get logical about why there is no chance I'm a killer?

She's into the "suspicious" group of girls and unless I manage to get her brainwashedly wet, I feel like she's gonna throw that at me when I try to pull. Also she'll be driving most likely so it'll be impossible to just get up and go. I guess I have no ideia on how to persist in high "points" like this.

Honestly? I figure that at this point they must be on to me; too many questions are being asked. So I kill them.

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

OK, the situation developed a little bit further so I wanted to hold on a little bit before giving an update, but I'll just do it twice if it's the case.

She texted me once she got home. Nice, we got into quick convo. No text for 1.5 days then she asks me out on Saturday 6 pm - great investment - but we rescheduled to tomorrow. So she's responding well, as opposed to my original read. I guess I have a chance of pulling her tomorrow. Now addressing you guys' points:

@mrre:

Yeah, well, I don't know how to describe it. Given her reaction afterwards where she seems much more comfortable I guess she was just worried about herself being a small girl and all. She drove me home, if I had an opportunity to kill her it'd be there... so she needed this one more date to get at ease. It might be that I suck but it didn't seem like it was something that I could turn at the moment so I'm glad I just kept it cool and got her talking more about her life. Hopefully she's more connected by now.

On sexuality, definitively. I will start giving way less fucks about it. I guess I was looking for an effective mental model to do so, but maybe I should just don't care lol

@RT

lol I didn't mean pulling a list and going over it. But rather: "if I really wanted to kill you I'd have done it when I was alone with you and already in your car lol" though I'd never do with this particular example as it'd cement the killer frame subconsciously. Or maybe not... Chase once wrote how you can overload them with logic and show them that they are being extremely silly with their girly logic.

In any case, I'd playfully point out reasons as to why I couldn't be a killer as opposed to the default frame battle response which is just say something that has absolutely nothing to do with the frame. But I guess it won't be necessary.

@LN

Yeah, logistics are super important. I had awesome logistics before so I understand -- now it's not applicable because 99.9% of the times the pull will happen in my car or the girl's (or Uber, taxi, etc). This girl actually gave a somewhat cool idea depending on the time that I pull... instead of pulling to my apartment, suggest we come to my lobby. Less friction, easier to ask up once there. It's kinda fucked up if it's early because a lot of people walk by and it's bright. But can work with your "change of scenery."

Honestly? I figure that at this point they must be on to me; too many questions are being asked. So I kill them.

Unfortunately that doesn't solve my problem...

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

So today I just said for her to come over, and she comes up directly. So yeah no probs here. Still didn't fuck her though

 

[Sandman]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

So today I just said for her to come over, and she comes up directly. So yeah no probs here. Still didn't fuck her though

What happened? Did you make a move?

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Yup. She texted me "coming up" then we came straight to my bedroom no resistance from her part. I start touching her very aggressively for 5 mins during small talk and she takes my hand out of her leg once or twice but I kiss her within 5 mind and no resistance.

Then we just continue with heavy make out for a long while because she wouldn't let me touch her tits or her bra for very long; same for the pussy. I tried putting her hand on my dick several times and she resisted. I guess I could have used more verbal game for that, but anyways.

I'm grabbing her ass and she's ok with it. I also have my thighs between her legs and her pussy is ON FIRE, and feeling that I try to go for the pussy. After a while she says "BD.." "hm?" "I don't feel like doing it today" "no prob" and I continued kissing her. This already happened to me before: I can't even take girl's shirt off while she says she doesn't feel like it and the next date we have one of my most memorable nights ever; she was an animal. So I don't bother because I know for a fact I'll fuck this girl (you have to be able to gauge it otherwise you'll probably lose girls).

Eventually I get tired of eternal foreplay and stop. She lays on my chest talking about her like and I'm giving her shit because she likes to dance and I ask her to dance pole for me, my hair is a mess and I call her bad girl and as the jokes get more aggressive and direct she's forcibly giggling at every single one. So adorable.

She says she has to go, I pull her back in and start making out again. She's on top and not leaving and more permissive this time (I guess she saw I'm not worried she'll leave) but eventually she has to go.

I'll probably schedule something for this weekend and fuck her. I honestly think I could have had a way better verbal game; I didn't talk much cause there were people in my place and I was self-conscious. If I don't get at least a pornstar blowjob I'm gonna let her sit for a while.

I have two questions now that I think of it:

1.) Can a girl categorize you as a "nice guy" by your sex style? I have a fetiche for hands and love holding them, even during sex. Can it look a little bit too romantic and nice guy-ish for a girl if I very clearly don't act like one for example?

2.) I wanted to know you guys' opinion on how you feel about postponing sex in the fashion above. Before I'd always go for the kill but I'd probably have lost this girl as I couldn't fuck her on the 1st date and would be disappointed.

Sex on the 4th encounter is within my limit so I'm cool, but coming from a place where 80% of my lays are on the 1st date I wonder if she clearly views me as the most dominant guys she's ever been with. I ask because 4th encounter sounds like Average Joe territory for me even if the situation ended on high note under my perspective

 

[Sandman]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

I have two questions now that I think of it:

1.) Can a girl categorize you as a "nice guy" by your sex style? I have a fetiche for hands and love holding them, even during sex. Can it look a little bit too romantic and nice guy-ish for a girl if I very clearly don't act like one for example?

2.) I wanted to know you guys' opinion on how you feel about postponing sex in the fashion above. Sex on the 4th encounter is within my limit so I'm cool, but coming from a place where 80% of my lays are on the 1st date I wonder if she clearly views me as the most dominant guys she's ever been with. I ask because 4th encounter sounds like Average Joe territory for me even if the situation ended on high note under my perspective

Ahh blue balls I feel for you bro!

First of I think you did good with escalating but being cool with her resistance. You should be okay with not having sex. Bursts of passion and taking a big step back in a chill way works very good for lmr. So I don't bother because I know for a fact I will fuck thia girl is a very good mental model.

Q - A:

1.) Definetely! Imagine guy doing missionary, looking at the girl doe-eyed and asking "is that okay for you honey?". Not a pretty sight haha. I don't think just holding her hand will make you look like a "nice guy" if you are otherwise dominant. When I hold a girls hand during sex, mine is usually close to pinning them down but my sex game is very dominant and kinky (slapping her face, spitting, choking etc.). Of course different strokes for different girls and it's good to mix it up once in a while but erring on the side of dominance is best.

2.) I am in the same boat with you on this one. 90% of my lays 1st date sex and a few second date sex. I'm a 100% GC guy so it's hard to be free of the conditioning haha. Never had a third date with a girl I haven't fucked (except for one situatjon with a friend with whom I always chilled, flirted with before finally fucking). Who cares if she sees you as "not the most dominant guy" though as long as you fuck her. We just need to be careful not to invest in the girl too much as the chances of sex actually quite diminish with each time so it's usually better to find a new girl. But as long as you are having fun, not investing much... Why not?

 

[Richard]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Quick little bit of information;

When escalating on a new girl for the first time the push-pull (that Mrre is talking about) works well to get past LMR.

With this girl BECAUSE you've been on a few dates and previously tried to escalate, there was another tactic you could have used to get past the LMR and that's a pattern interrupt.

After a while she says "BD.." "hm?" "I don't feel like doing it today" "no prob" and I continued kissing her.

I prefer this route with new girls (1st date resistance, sometimes 2nd date resistance if I have any) but I think the optimal play here was to dial yourself back and interrupt her resistance:

Her: "I don't feel like doing it today."
Me: "Listen XYZ, we have great chemistry and I enjoy spending time with you but I feel like something is bothering you and maybe you're afraid to ask me. You can ask me anything that's on your mind, anything at all you want to know about me?"

This is probably more optimal if she puts up resistance on date #4 but I limit myself to 3 dates (very rarely have I ever gotten resistance on a 3rd date) and that's when I'll pull this out. Generally, I hear questions related to my sexual history; how many women I've been with, if I've been tested for STDs, etc. Works well for me because on the 3rd date I'm still usually calm and collected but it's when I START to lose interest and pursue other ventures so the combination of my attitude/connection plus the outline above works pretty well.

Anyway, you could have tried that this time but if she puts up resistance on the 4th date/meet then use the template above and be relatively open with your answers, within reason. If she asks you how many women you've been with, you should know to not directly say "Um, I think I'm at 29 or something now" type of deal. Afterwards, a lot of the hesitancy she feels will dissipate and there will be little-to-no further resistance. Might take her a little while to process that, though, so if she doesn't give in then you'll want to turn your attention to something else.

So, if you two were passionately making out and she starts to resist and you use the template above --> if she refuses to fuck you after that then I'd turn on the TV and focus on that and stop escalating with her until she gets the hint; she'll realize she's losing you (if she doesn't just attack you afterwards, that is) and she'll make a final decision IF you remain disinterested. Logically, by the 4th date you've invested plenty of time and energy into her and it's natural to cut your losses based on diminishing returns.

-Richard

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

@mrre:

Ahh blue balls I feel for you bro!

Fuck me right, if girls knew this happened I'd hope it'd make them more empathic =P

1.) Definetely! Imagine guy doing missionary, looking at the girl doe-eyed and asking "is that okay for you honey?"

Yeah I get where you are coming from, but that's too much indeed haha I think I'm aggressive enough to offset the hand-holding.

2.) I'm a 100% GC guy so it's hard to be free of the conditioning haha.

I know right! I can relate lol

Who cares if she sees you as "not the most dominant guy" though as long as you fuck her. We just need to be careful not to invest in the girl too much as the chances of sex actually quite diminish with each time so it's usually better to find a new girl. But as long as you are having fun, not investing much... Why not?

That's precisely how I feel. But lately, as I've been screening for possible long-term candidates, I have the additional worry of setting the right precedent just in case. The problem is that "fast" is relative; for this particular girl, the fastest might have been one month so if I end up fucking her on our next date (10 days) I should be safe. But if she had fucked a guy in one hour in the past, I probably don't rank very well in her mind.

I think it's a benefit, as you've said, to have a outcome-free mindset: "as long as I fuck her by my limit, which is the 4th date, I'm cool..." though in hindsight it's too close to the traditional 5 dates bullshit, therefore too nice. I will still try every time to do it on the first date while having a 4-date limit, it's just for added awareness that I say that.

@Richard:

Great, I'll have it in mind. Thanks for the tip.

I thought I'd flip her shit on her saying something to the likes of "haha, I can see you don't want it your pussy is ON FIRE " she'd probably maintain her silly frame and I'd be like "OK then, no worries" and lay by her side doing some distracting shit. Then strike again and tease every time "is this just because of me? you sure don't seem like you want anything."

But since I had already been through this exact situation in the past where I tried every single trick I had to no avail because the girl "didn't feel like it, maybe next time" and when next time came there was absolute no resistance and it was an awesome night... I just ignored it. I don't know, maybe she's on her period and self-concious about it or god knows what reason (which makes even more sense to ask).

If it happened the she'd resist on the 4th encounter then I'd probably flip my shit on her, so I'm glad you provided a useful framework for situations like that.

 

[Big Daddy]

Re: The "You May Be a Serial Killer" Test + Whether Or Not To "Push" Thru Object

Update: OK, so we had our 4th date.

We had scheduled something for yesterday but something came up for her and she apologized and asked if we could do something today. Sure. Then I text her maybe 4 pm "so what are the plans for today?" because she had asked to reschedule, so I'm making her invest more and see if she suggests my place. She texts me 7 pm "how about a basic [place] at 9? I'll pick you up and drop you off."

That's close enough to "I'll come to your place and suck you off" for me. My plan is to stay there and pull her back to my place. She picks me up and is dressed very cute with makeup, nice sign. We get to the place and she says early on that she "has to wake early tomorrow bla bla" so I already anticipate a problematic pull. We talk a little bit, I have my arms around her waist, and at some point she says she want's to get some ice cream. We go there, line is huge, she gets her ice cream, finishes, we go back to hugging and talking.

I feel she wants to kiss me SO BAD so I give her a little peck and say I can't do that in public because I'll have to tear her clothes apart and look the other way. She jokingly gives me some shit for it and still has her arms around me. In a somewhat uncalibrated move because a) I'm really bad at this b) I'm running out of time before it's too late and couldn't care less how it sounded (we were there for 1.5 hours already with all the lines and shit, plus she drives super slow) I ask her:

Me: do you wanna go to my place?
Her: nah it's super late already, I'll have to wake up early tomorrow
Me: we'll stay for five minutes
Her: no really it's late already and I'll be alone [in the car]
Me: we'll stay five minutes, you can put a timer if you want

So I lead her, we go to her car and she drives to my place and stops right in the middle of the street and say "no five minutes, I really have to go" and I say "there's a parking spot right there. Five minutes, let's go." she submits, we go up to my room, start making out and she's more permissive but not entirely. I'm rubbing her pussy on top of her panties (she's wearing a skirt) but when I go for removing the bra she says "don't doo it bla bla." Eventually a timer goes off on her phone (I didn't believe she actually did it...) and I turn it off and continue kissing her.

What follows is a dance of she saying she had to go because her parents would give her mad shit, this and that, and I'm teasing her to stay while kissing (at some point I wonder if she is legitimately worried of driving alone to her place through more dangerous parts so I offer to drive her there, but nope). Eventually she slowly manages to sit, and I'm just PISSED and let an involuntary and huge sigh go off slowly with my hand on my face/eyes. Just like you would do if your 15 y/o son said he just crashed your '68 Mustang.

I sit and say "can I say you something?" which was actually just a setup for a random comment she says "... I'm lame/annoying isn't it?" I brush it off saying some stupid shit and then proceed to not saying anything during the whole walk to her car because I was just so pissed. She gets in and says "bye, see ya soon" or some shit like that but I just turn around and start walking to my car 'cause I was hitting an afterparty.

Well, anything other than "I'll go to your place and let you salvage my ass for hours" won't get a reply. This is so frustrating. The pickup gods gave the place all to myself, so I'm here thinking I'll be able to fuck her like a viking, but no. It's the longest I've EVER been on dates without sex, and now I almost don't feel like seeing her again, which frankly sucks because she's the first girl in a while that I could see dating for some time.

The most annoying shit about this is that I won't be going out meeting new girls for quite a while now it'd be nice to have a FWB/date for some months. I invested more than I normally would because she seemed cool and all, but fuck this shit. I guess I could probably sleep with her eventually, and being in the position I'm in it'd make more rational sense to loosen my "standards" to fuck her eventually and keep her for longer, but I don't even want to think about it.

(Oh, Richard, I ended up not trying what you suggested. For a while I was confused if she was giving me shit just because or if she had a legitimate worry. Somewhere along the way I just lost my mind and didn't even feel like giving her reasons to say she had to go anymore. I'm curious to see what would've happened in retrospect, though, but I don't think I'd pull it off in the right tone. However, at this point she very obviously knows I probably won't talk to her anymore unless she gives me what I want, so she'll to weigh whatever the reason is vs how much she likes me.)