This girl is sending me confusing vibes!

[Richard]

Hey everyone, I'm a big fan of the website, and have learned alot, and have started to implement most of the advice Chase gives. Anyway, my first girlfriend was Puerto Rican, I turned down alot of girls while waiting for her, and she was my first and most recent ex, now, I'm ready to start dating again. I'm 18, and I was talking to a friend in high school at the end of the day, we we're laughing and talking, I was teasing her a bit, and asked her with a statement to "Let me take her out some time," she said yes, then I asked for her contact information, and got her phone number. Later that day, I was playing basketball, and a friend dropped my phone, and I lost all my contacts. I got a new phone a couple days later, got her number from a mutual friend, and we we're texting. She's a model (legit), and also has a mild case of sleep apnea. She already said yes to a date before, but doesn't really text me back because she's "busy modeling, or her sleep apnea will knock her out at random times." At our graduation, I told her she was sending me confusing vibes, and told her, if she was interested to let me take her out, and she said yes again. Now, I'll text her, and she'll text for a little bit, then disappear completely, I'll stop texting her for a day or two, and she'll text me out of the blue and say hi, continue to talk for a while, then disappear. She's already said yes to me twice, but doesn't really text me back, so, is she genuinely interested or no? What should I do guys?

 

[Franco]

Hey Zphix, welcome to the boards!

She's already said yes to me twice, but doesn't really text me back, so, is she genuinely interested or no? What should I do guys?

I'm not sure what your text conversations have entailed, but it sounds to me like you haven't been setting up concrete dates with her. It's easy for a girl to say "yes" to the question, "Do you want to go out with me sometime?" She isn't really having to agree to anything concrete, so she can say "yes" and not worry about any drama or negative reactions from you receiving a "no."

So with that being said, I would try to set up a concrete date with her. Next time you ask her out, ask her for her schedule and what times work best for her. If she gives you days and times, then pick one of them, and see if she agrees. Once that happens, you can focus on actually going on a date with her. If she keeps dodging the questions, (i.e. multiple responses that say "I'm not sure" or "maybe next week"), then she's probably not interested. If she actually agrees to a time, well, you have your answer!

In summary, focus on setting up concrete dates so that she can't be flaky. It forces her to make a decision, and it also lets her know you're a legitimate man that means business when he wants a woman. If she ends up being flaky anyway, then you can move onto the next girl, and she might even chase you down if she finds out that you don't wait for women because you have an abundance of them.

Cheers,

Franco

 

[Richard]

I appreciate the advice Franco, and I will. As of lately, she hasn't been texting me back at all and I feel like one of my biggest problems is making myself too available, instead of getting her to chase, the way her and I have talked ( I reviewed our convos), it seems like I underlying let her know that she has my attention, and I want to take her out so she didn't have to chase. At this point with her, I've decided to put it all away, and take another person's advice and give it about 4-6 weeks and try again, because in my opinion, she has lost interest because she hasn't been texting me back at all... Ohhhh well, you live and you learn!
- Thanks, Zphix