Thoughts on this Texting?

[Native]

I texted my friend from college, and I was kind of an orbiter and didn't know shit... but this is the conversation after I found GC:

Me: "Hey XYZ, you're my Valentine, right?"
Her: "Who's this?"
Her: "Ohh nevermmindd I gotcha!"
Me: "Ouch... there goes my ego"
Her: "I'm sorry"
Me: "Apology accepted if you're my Valentine "
Her: "Lol you trying to be cute huh?"
Me:" Depending on if it's working or not ?
Her: "Lol maybe"
Me: "Can I get a solid yes or no? All kidding aside... blah blah blah stuff"
Her: "It was working and I've been alright..."

and so on and so forth... my phone ended up dying while I was out after a few more texts... but what do you guys think? In college I was an orbiter to this girl, and from her responses I feel like I've changed a bit because she seemed a little more into it than she would've been in my college days...

 

[PinotNoir]

The first line is at least confident, and I like that.

The problem is that "being my valentine" is almost seen like a commitment thing (like boyfriend-girlfriend). So, from this viewpoint, it's like you're trying to pressure a girl into being your potential girlfriend right off the bat, which isn't good. You're already trying to slot yourself in the boyfriend role. Subtext:

"Hey XYZ, you're my potential girlfriend, right?"
"I'm intrigued; this may be a crush of mine. Who is this?"
(If quick enough could have replied, "Casanova of course ")

"Ouch... there goes my ego"
"I'm sorry"

To me, it's obvious that you're not too serious, but to her, it must have come off as serious because she apologized. So, to her, it sounded like this subtext:

"My feelings are hurt. I'm an emotional guy."
"I'm sorry."

But, then she gets it. Her response is playful and good here:

"Apology accepted if you're my Valentine "
"Lol you trying to be cute huh?"

And, then here, it is too much pressuring. You keep applying pressure to the same topic, which is not good:

Me:" Depending on if it's working or not ?
Her: "Lol maybe"
Me: "Can I get a solid yes or no? All kidding aside... blah blah blah stuff"
Her: "It was working and I've been alright..."

It's not bad, but I think it could have gone better.

Instead of asking again "Can I get a solid yes or no?", you could have just said, "So what are your plans tonight? Being swept off your feet by a guy on a white horse?" or just something, moving the conversation along onto the next topic. Eventually, after some more banter and you find out her plans, then you can ask, "Well, let's me and you do something then. Let's not be alone on v-day " If she says "maybe," then you just say, "You just told me that you're not doing anything. Come on, let's live and be young!"

Remember that you should have a goal in mind for texting. It should be moving forward to a destination (metaphorical or physical).

 

[Native]

Dude, stop acting like women are above you. They're not any better than you, any more special, any more valuable, and their affection isn't worth any more than your own. Once you understand that we're all just people of equal value, you'll stop chasing and supplicating and pursuing and demanding that women like you. They hate that stuff, just like you'd hate it if a girl you weren't attracted to tried all the same things on you.

Take the pussy off the pedestal, unless you're trying to get a view up the skirt.

Drexel,

Thanks for the response . Can you elaborate more on your first point?

I treat everyone as equals... did I unintentionally lower my value, or up hers in my texting? =(

-NaTiVe

 

[Axel Page]

Dude, stop acting like women are above you. They're not any better than you, any more special, any more valuable, and their affection isn't worth any more than your own. Once you understand that we're all just people of equal value, you'll stop chasing and supplicating and pursuing and demanding that women like you. They hate that stuff, just like you'd hate it if a girl you weren't attracted to tried all the same things on you.

Take the pussy off the pedestal, unless you're trying to get a view up the skirt.

Drexel,

Thanks for the response . Can you elaborate more on your first point?

I treat everyone as equals... did I unintentionally lower my value, or up hers in my texting? =(

-NaTiVe

I think Drexel is just referencing you asking her to be your valentine over and over. Basically, men and women are equal, and if u view it that way, there is no need to appear to be chasing them. It should be an equal push pull between both men and women.