Tinder

[Estate]

Gave this a go lately, never really got into these apps much before. I've seen a few FR's coming from it lately.

Any good experiences with it or how to use it? I see a lot of college age people doing pretty good on it. I'm in my late 20's... I'm not sure how popular it is with women my age, nobody really talks about it much.
I read one of two articles online about guys who get "100% matches" but it usually revolves around them creating fake profiles of cutsie things girls like, like puppies or photoshopping yourself into ridiclous pictures to get likes for the LOLs but I can't see that translating into real life. Plus it feels like waaaaaaay too much effort to actually do that stuff.

Obviously you get half a second to impress, I get matches but not really anyone I'd be into. Obviously girls I could get talking to in person are swiping left in that half second... lol... eek, maybe my game HAS improved if my looks aren't so good, haha.

Seriously though, get the ball rolling, any tips? Is it even worth it?

 

[Momentum]

Tinder's a good medium to meet women. Unlike cold approach, dating site/apps are full of women who are already in a setting meant for romantic/hook up purposes.

If you're not getting enough women, you need to expand the search and get older women into your search preferences. Older women are the horniest women on Tinder. I've had quite a number of sexual experiences with 30+ year old women on Tinder so far. A college age girl may not know what she's even looking for, she may be on there for fun and curiosity, and may not even be searching for men your age. However, a cougar is on their for sexual reasons and you don't have to worry about being out of her age range.

I've noticed that the area where you use it is 90% of Tinder's effectiveness. I live in one of the biggest cities in the United States and there's a lots of women using Tinder. I went on a trip a few weeks ago to a somewhat small city, and I was surprised at how few women were using it.

 

[RDawg]

- Estate

A few board members have recently PM'ed about tinder and I figured I would chime in here.

Tinder is a very interesting and great tool to use. Personally, I have had some great success recently with this app (as you can see on the field reports). With that being said, it took me a while to figure out how to use Tinder effectively and appropriately. Since, I have given Tinder a second chance about a month ago, I have had 2 lay's off it already and almost a third. The only reason why I gave it a second chance was because I was getting busy with school and I wasn't going out as much, so I figured i'd give it a try again. I myself am 21 year's old and in University but I had a friend who was 30 year's old using Tinder and he was getting some good results from tinder as well. Tinder is a very popular app and I think most single people with a smart phone today, have it.

In terms of using it, I'll share a few tips of mine that I use. Firstly, I'll use 3 photo's of me. My first photo being the "best" photo, since most people will judge you off your first photo, and some girl's won't even bother to look through your profile. They will just swipe you left or right based on your first photo. As for myself, I use a photo of me that is shirtless and show's my abs good (I find this works best for me). Secondly, I have a photo that is professional taking and is a shot of me from the waist up, wearing a workout sleeveless shirt. Lastly, my third photo is a photo of me and my buddy's just posing for a picture (use this one for social proof). At the end of the day, tinder is all based on physical attraction, so if you have some "Good" quality photo's of yourself, then I would use those to get best results in terms of matches.

Additionally, when I am using Tinder, I'll quickly swipe through and like every girl's photo's and then i'll get matches with girls that are hot, decent and unattractive. I'll message the one's I am obviously interested in. I'll share a few messages and then suggest a date and exchange numbers. This is my strategy and so far it's been very effective for me

Also, I was always skeptical of Tinder at first, as I looked at it as just a validation boost for most people. And to some people it is just a validation boost but there are plenty of girl's that are on there looking for "one night stand's", "casual relationships" and even "long term relationships".

In my opinion, Tinder is best used when you don't have time to go out and meet women (e.g., busy with work or school). Also, it can be useful when travelling out of town as well. It is also best to have a little bit of experience with women before using an app like this, so you know what your doing once you get out on the date and in the field.

So, I think it's worth a try Estate, you got nothing to lose but only potentially improve your game even more than it already is.

Hope this helps!

- Rdawg

 

[Estate]

Cheers guys,

Yeah, not really looking for it to replace real life meeting people. Before all this I used to do online dating a lot and there's really nothing can replace meeting people in person.
I see a lot of people are using Tinder though, was wondering how it would go.

Maybe I'll play around with my pictures. I think I'm passed on by most hot girls but it's not a big deal. I don't want to put too much effort into it.

I have 4 pics, 2 of me in my best gear out at night, one of me sitting in a Formula car before a race and one of me snowboarding.

I'm not a big topless guys... I'm the pastiest of white you've ever seen, haha.

 

[Lotus]

Estate

I have to agree with Rdawg on the fact that you really should be swiping right for every girl and then filtering from there. Especially if you are just looking for a lay, you never know what you can find. Also, for entertainment value using pickup lines on less attractive girls is fun.

I ran into a fact on the chive(no idea about credibility of it) that said over half of tinder hook ups happen within a 1 mile radius. That might be something affecting your match percent depending on your living situation.

On another note relating to tinder. has any one established tinder "game" or a strategy they use once matching? I have been able to get matches here and there but everything fizzles out because I'm either too boring/ or clearly trying to hard to impress. Its hard to find a happy medium in between the two.

 

[mindful]

Estate

I have to agree with Rdawg on the fact that you really should be swiping right for every girl and then filtering from there. Especially if you are just looking for a lay, you never know what you can find. Also, for entertainment value using pickup lines on less attractive girls is fun.

I ran into a fact on the chive(no idea about credibility of it) that said over half of tinder hook ups happen within a 1 mile radius. That might be something affecting your match percent depending on your living situation.

On another note relating to tinder. has any one established tinder "game" or a strategy they use once matching? I have been able to get matches here and there but everything fizzles out because I'm either too boring/ or clearly trying to hard to impress. Its hard to find a happy medium in between the two.

Depends on my mood and the girl, but usually the first thing I say is something like , "Hi X!, How is tinder treating you?". Pretty much every girl responds, i rarely get a girl that doesn't.
After this, I then try to comment about something about her: her hair, her smile, something in her profile. In this same message, I will make it clear I find her very cute (use expressive language in this next message to really seem genuine). I then continue to play it cool and just ask general questions to not seem creepy. (you live in the area? where you go to school, etc). If a girl is giving me one word answers or it seems like a one-end street I will either just simply stop messaging her or go off in the deep end and say something more forward like hey, lets exchange numbers, etc. If it is flowing good, after 3-4 questions I will suggest we exchange numbers. After that you are back in girls chase mode and ask her her schedule to set up a date.

Another thing to note, don't be afraid to text a little more during this process, in terms of your answers. You've never met this girl so you have to sell yourself a little more than if you met her in cold approach, etc.

This works because most guys come off way too strong and mess it up in their messages. You want to make it clear you find her attractive, while at the same time seem real and genuine.

Good luck.

 

[Lotus]

Depends on my mood and the girl, but usually the first thing I say is something like , "Hi X!, How is tinder treating you?". Pretty much every girl responds, i rarely get a girl that doesn't.
After this, I then try to comment about something about her: her hair, her smile, something in her profile. In this same message, I will make it clear I find her very cute (use expressive language in this next message to really seem genuine). I then continue to play it cool and just ask general questions to not seem creepy. (you live in the area? where you go to school, etc). If a girl is giving me one word answers or it seems like a one-end street I will either just simply stop messaging her or go off in the deep end and say something more forward like hey, lets exchange numbers, etc. If it is flowing good, after 3-4 questions I will suggest we exchange numbers. After that you are back in girls chase mode and ask her her schedule to set up a date.

I'm going to test out that opener and see how it does for me. I have had a good amount of trouble with openers. Have tried the sexual ones, funny compliments, genuine compliments, weird questions such as "would you rather have one X sized X or 100 X sized ZX's, not getting consistent results on any front.

At this point I'm thinking my execution is poor or my profile picture is way better than all others?

 

[Estate]

I actually deleted it this weekend as its a bit of a time sync.

I did find it an odd experience. I get some matches but really nothing I'd be interested in pursuing. I think my pictures are pretty decent and all that butvery few matches from dateable women.

Another app someone showed me lately is Hinge. The funny thing I've found about Hinge is that I get a lot of matches. And I get matched quite often by the same girls I've liked on Tinder but they don't match me on there.

It's all a bit odd. I'm guessing it's more normal for the college crowd. For me around 30.. I dont find that people I know in general really ever use Tinder, Snapchat, instagram, etc or if they have the app it's out of curiosity and not like they'd be willing to actually meet someone from it. Maybe that's just the circles I'm in or my age. I dont know. Early 20s crowd seems to use it a lot. College women I meet out ask to add me on those apps a lot but I e never heard the same of a career girl of my age.

I got out of online dating a long time back anyway. I kind it all creates a strange false economy. The top tier of women would never need these apps... yet even though I've learned you can get 9s and 10s in real life.... a 10 on these apps is probably a 7 in real life yet the chance of landing her online is slim as she's overwhelmed with options... It's a very strange world.

 

[Lotus]

I actually deleted it this weekend as its a bit of a time sync.

When you put it like that, I should delete it.

I can say I have spent at least 10 hours online dating in the past 3 months and minimal out of it. A couple mildly entertaining conversations and phone numbers that didn't pan out is not worth it.

Could have spent 10 hours improving myself to be more attractive in real life and gotten much better results. Probably going to stop using it now haha.

 

[mindful]

I actually deleted it this weekend as its a bit of a time sync.

When you put it like that, I should delete it.

I can say I have spent at least 10 hours online dating in the past 3 months and minimal out of it. A couple mildly entertaining conversations and phone numbers that didn't pan out is not worth it.

Could have spent 10 hours improving myself to be more attractive in real life and gotten much better results. Probably going to stop using it now haha.

This is one of the reasons I don't like to use it a lot. Not sure how it is for people within the college scene but it can be frustrating and mentally draining trying to reel a chick in. And because it's still technically online, girls have the upper hand. You really need a game plan and just stick to it and accept that your failure and flake rate will be high.

 

[Lotus]

Mindful,

Used your "Hi XX, how is the tinder world treating you?" combined with a better bio "I can grow a beard, I hope you cant" and I have already gotten improvement. Just as I was going to delete it.

Also, as soon as the ice is broken and she responses how about you? I go "it's going " and then change the subject has helped break in.

But still don't want to spend much time on it as I'm trying to get away from my phone more.

-Taylor

 

[mindful]

Nice. That bio is actually really clever and funny.

Personally, I don't put anything in my bio. The more mysterious the better.