- Joined
- Jul 6, 2014
- Messages
- 486
Background
Her: slim Chinese girl, long brown hair.How we met: Daygame cold approach. It was almost a blowout, but she hooked well. The texting was skill's soft-close structure with good morning pings and eyes emoji, and also got a lot of help from velasco on the implementation and soft-closing.
Date Structure:
Met at a food court where I bought some boba, walked over to the park where I talked with her about stuff. I didn't do my homework properly and didn't come up with a third location to bounce to, and I was planning to just wing it. Topics list was
- what it feels like to go back to school
- living with roommates
- what we're like in high school
- Growing up religious and shedding that because...purity gambit
- Sexual Chemistry Social Chemistry gambit
- A bad date that she had with a guy who's kino was bad
- Some of my past relationships
- Her relationship with her parents, marriage, transition to 8 orgasms routine
- Overthinking relationships and dating foreigners
- Wrap up, talking about tv shows
First Venue
I meet her outside the cafe spot which is located inside of a food court. We walk in and just make some light chitchat about how they have a lot of stuff, she says she already had dinner and I order some bubble tea. I start by asking her about her semester and what it's like going back to campus. She doesn't really think about that and so I reframe it to how it's almost like you stepped back in time.So going into the date, my plan was to start out by telling her about an eye surgery that I had in order to get her to look into my eyes to figure out which eye was the one with the surgery. This is a trick I picked up from a study that found that when they told both partners that the other person had eye surgery in one of their eyes, it led to a 2x increase in second dates. Because both partners were tricked into looking into each other eyes.
So I continue about the thread of what it was like in her first year and we touch upon the topic of how when you first move into a place, the campus feels so big but then it's different when you've moved into there for a while. We decide to walk towards the park nearby. Then we talk about having roommates and she asks if I feel lonely not having any roommates. She has one and I say how my friend was telling me how something might happen to her and that's why she wants a roommate. I say "I never had anything like that, but the only time I had something strange happen was when I randomly found a new eye floater and it was really distracting to me." I tell her how I had to get surgery and you can actually subtly notice one of my eyes is different( it's not, I'm just bullshitting to get her curious to figure out which one it is). She looks into my eyes. I play it off that it doesn't affect your vision and that it disappears after a while. So then my parents were worried and wanted to come to visit me. (I said that to tie it all together otherwise it's a bit random) She asks if I have a younger sibling and then we talk about our ages.
So I continue about the thread of what it was like in her first year and we touch upon the topic of how when you first move into a place, the campus feels so big but then it's different when you've moved into there for a while. We decide to walk towards the park nearby. Then we talk about having roommates and she asks if I feel lonely not having any roommates. She has one and I say how my friend was telling me how something might happen to her and that's why she wants a roommate. I say "I never had anything like that, but the only time I had something strange happen was when I randomly found a new eye floater and it was really distracting to me." I tell her how I had to get surgery and you can actually subtly notice one of my eyes is different( it's not, I'm just bullshitting to get her curious to figure out which one it is). She looks into my eyes. I play it off that it doesn't affect your vision and that it disappears after a while. So then my parents were worried and wanted to come to visit me. (I said that to tie it all together otherwise it's a bit random) She asks if I have a younger sibling and then we talk about our ages.
Second Venue
We find a bench by the park and I ask her if she knows this place but doesn't really know it. I ask her what part of the district she lives and say how I always wanted to live above a Whole foods. And she says "yeah that would be so cool, everytime you want something you can just go downstairs"
I ask her if she has roommates and she has one. I offer a sip of my drink but she doesn't want to try it. She says she used to order boba every day but after that, she stopped because she said she would get breakouts if she has so much. So I qualify her saying it's good that she's being healthy about sugar but she starts laughing and says no she just replaces it with ice cream, so I mildly tease her about that as an excuse to touch her knee. I say that I rarely eat ice cream alone.
Then we talk about where she did her undergrad. She said I wouldn't know it but she tells me instead about her hometown Chongqing, so I share a story about my classmate from Chongqing and how she brought back some instant noodles for me because I mentioned how I liked Chongqing noodles (it's a dish there). She says that she just likes a simple life there. So I ask her about that and she says how at her internship the manager asks her to do the life map and you basically tell your story. She says how everyone is so dramatic and giving an elaborate story and meanwhile she is giving a very simple story. She tells me about her coworker from london who had a crazy background. So I relate with that saying how I remember the introduction at my internship was really awkward because you only say basic things like "oh I live here blah blah blah" but " I did find that even though it was remote, we were very friendly and keep in touch afterwards" So I transitioned to asking her what she was like in high school
She tells me how she didn't do anythign particularly crazy. Since she was the only child in her family her dad would drive her to school every single day. She would not put too much effort to study. Just hangout her friends and actually she did really badly junior year and so she had to shape up in order to get into a college. I say "for me I grew up a little religious in high school" Her: YOur parents are strict? Me; My parents aren't really religious anymore but that was one part of my personality that I had to cut out.
I tell her the story about how once in college I got approached by some bible study group and. I tell her how I used to go to bible study. She kept interjecting and said how she was there too. So I continue with how I didn't really believe in it and then I looked back at the religion I grew up in and realized I didn't believe in it either. Because one thing that didn't sit well with me was the concept of purity.
Then we talk about where she did her undergrad. She said I wouldn't know it but she tells me instead about her hometown Chongqing, so I share a story about my classmate from Chongqing and how she brought back some instant noodles for me because I mentioned how I liked Chongqing noodles (it's a dish there). She says that she just likes a simple life there. So I ask her about that and she says how at her internship the manager asks her to do the life map and you basically tell your story. She says how everyone is so dramatic and giving an elaborate story and meanwhile she is giving a very simple story. She tells me about her coworker from london who had a crazy background. So I relate with that saying how I remember the introduction at my internship was really awkward because you only say basic things like "oh I live here blah blah blah" but " I did find that even though it was remote, we were very friendly and keep in touch afterwards" So I transitioned to asking her what she was like in high school
She tells me how she didn't do anythign particularly crazy. Since she was the only child in her family her dad would drive her to school every single day. She would not put too much effort to study. Just hangout her friends and actually she did really badly junior year and so she had to shape up in order to get into a college. I say "for me I grew up a little religious in high school" Her: YOur parents are strict? Me; My parents aren't really religious anymore but that was one part of my personality that I had to cut out.
I tell her the story about how once in college I got approached by some bible study group and. I tell her how I used to go to bible study. She kept interjecting and said how she was there too. So I continue with how I didn't really believe in it and then I looked back at the religion I grew up in and realized I didn't believe in it either. Because one thing that didn't sit well with me was the concept of purity.
I go into the purity gambit.
She agrees.
Her: yea they try to avoid talking about this.
Me: I think people growing up in these religious households have a lot of discomfort with sex and they end up having these double standards, for example with a guy they are fine with them having a lot of sex but for a girl they are really judgemental
Her: Yea! yea you are free to choose the life you want
Her: ... but actually I know in china people don't like to share about sex and there's a lot shame
Me: Yeah there's a lot of shame
Her: Yea!
Me: I never understood that.
Her: I think it's because of a lack of education because in china, the resources are limited. Someone should do something to educate them. Her: But after I come here, it's like oh my god Me: because everyone is very sex positive here?
Her: Yea! you know
Her: Do you feel like when you meet someone? you're attracted to her because of sex?
Her: Because I ask my guy friends what do you think when you first meet a girl
Her: To be honest they say 80% of it is sex.
Me: So here's what I think about it...I actually don't like sex.
Her: really?
Me: I like good sex
Her; haha
Me: Here's the thing, when you meet someone theres a certain level of chemistry that you have with them. With some people with you have a lot chemistry and with some people you don't have a lot. But it's always to some degree right?
Her: Yea!
Me: Now when it comes to chemistry I realized there's an analogy to be made. It's like the moon. When you meet someone you have a social chemistry with them, whether you're good friends, whether you get along with them. But just like how the moon has another side to it, there's also the sexual chemistry that you could have with someone. And the way I see it is the better the sexual chemistry the better the social chemistry and the better the social chemistry the better the sexual chemistry.
Her: yea that's interesting. yeah never thought about that.
Me: So even when it comes to sex I don't like mcdonalds sex...
Her: What's that?
Me; You know the "slam bam thank you mam" really unfulfilling sex.
Her: But HOW can you have sex with someone if you're not attracted to her??
Me: No that's what I'm saying there needs to be that mental attraction as well as the physical. Like a good connection, essentially.
Her: yea
Me: I like good sex
Her; haha
Me: Here's the thing, when you meet someone theres a certain level of chemistry that you have with them. With some people with you have a lot chemistry and with some people you don't have a lot. But it's always to some degree right?
Her: Yea!
Me: Now when it comes to chemistry I realized there's an analogy to be made. It's like the moon. When you meet someone you have a social chemistry with them, whether you're good friends, whether you get along with them. But just like how the moon has another side to it, there's also the sexual chemistry that you could have with someone. And the way I see it is the better the sexual chemistry the better the social chemistry and the better the social chemistry the better the sexual chemistry.
Her: yea that's interesting. yeah never thought about that.
Me: So even when it comes to sex I don't like mcdonalds sex...
Her: What's that?
Me; You know the "slam bam thank you mam" really unfulfilling sex.
Her: But HOW can you have sex with someone if you're not attracted to her??
Me: No that's what I'm saying there needs to be that mental attraction as well as the physical. Like a good connection, essentially.
Her: yea
Me: and if I like a girl, I'd like to see her. I mean it's enjoyable you guys get along and have sex
Her: hahaha yea that's like never happened because when I had a boyfriend in China, we were like...super slow we talked lots of things, did a lot of things before we think we can commit to this relationship and it took a year and a half before we had sex, but in America, probably went on date first time or second time they ask me out and I'd say no. I wouldn't do that.
Her: Actually it happened to me near whole foods a guy asked me for phone number then asked me out to dinner but he just only touched me, but I know I don't like him so after that dinner I just run away. He messaged me like twice a week but I never respond. He was like are you alive?
Her: If I don't like him, then I don't like to be touched
Me: Oh so it takes you a while to get comfortable
Her: it's kind of mean! and also rude right?
Me; Yea I remember when I met my ex. It was on our first date, she told me...because she went through a lot of dark stuff before she met me...but she said she was very in her shell because of that and she really didn't like physical touch and for some reason I must've touched her when we're walking... I don't remember...because that's just how I am, and she was shocked because it didn't feel weird to her
Her: ahhh I see.
Me: and she was like...
Her: ahh probably this guy
Me: yea. I was just thinking like I'm just doing my thing being myself and she was just thinking "right then I knew we were going to have sex"
Her: ohhh on your first date?!?!
Me: Well we had sex on the 4th date.
Her: is that so fast? She asked or you asked?
Me: It just happened
Me: I mean we just gradually built up to it.
Me: But I don't view it in terms of the time frame, if it's right then it's right
Her: I don't know I just feel so weird because I don't think I'm physically or mentally looking for a relationship
Me: Oh well for example one time, I met this girl when I was traveling in shanghai and it was for a week and we had a 3-day fling. And that relationship was very pure because there was no expectation, no bitterness. But it was really good because we're in touch afterward she would always message me, we would keep in touch. It was pure
Her: yeah it happened naturally.
Me: Yea I'm the kind to go with the flow.
Her: hahaha yea that's like never happened because when I had a boyfriend in China, we were like...super slow we talked lots of things, did a lot of things before we think we can commit to this relationship and it took a year and a half before we had sex, but in America, probably went on date first time or second time they ask me out and I'd say no. I wouldn't do that.
Her: Actually it happened to me near whole foods a guy asked me for phone number then asked me out to dinner but he just only touched me, but I know I don't like him so after that dinner I just run away. He messaged me like twice a week but I never respond. He was like are you alive?
Her: If I don't like him, then I don't like to be touched
Me: Oh so it takes you a while to get comfortable
Her: it's kind of mean! and also rude right?
Me; Yea I remember when I met my ex. It was on our first date, she told me...because she went through a lot of dark stuff before she met me...but she said she was very in her shell because of that and she really didn't like physical touch and for some reason I must've touched her when we're walking... I don't remember...because that's just how I am, and she was shocked because it didn't feel weird to her
Her: ahhh I see.
Me: and she was like...
Her: ahh probably this guy
Me: yea. I was just thinking like I'm just doing my thing being myself and she was just thinking "right then I knew we were going to have sex"
Her: ohhh on your first date?!?!
Me: Well we had sex on the 4th date.
Her: is that so fast? She asked or you asked?
Me: It just happened
Me: I mean we just gradually built up to it.
Me: But I don't view it in terms of the time frame, if it's right then it's right
Her: I don't know I just feel so weird because I don't think I'm physically or mentally looking for a relationship
Me: Oh well for example one time, I met this girl when I was traveling in shanghai and it was for a week and we had a 3-day fling. And that relationship was very pure because there was no expectation, no bitterness. But it was really good because we're in touch afterward she would always message me, we would keep in touch. It was pure
Her: yeah it happened naturally.
Me: Yea I'm the kind to go with the flow.
I switch topics to the cube game
Her horse(representing lover) is a white flying unicorn with a beard and a nice long tail.
She says it was accurate but then thinks that everyone would say the same thing. Then I describe my scene and she cuts me off saying "we are the same!"
The conversation moves to her internship offer and how she would probably take the return. We both agree we want to stay in the city.
Me: So how is it with your parents...?
Transition to asking her if they ever pressure her to get married. so that I can transition to dating standards
Her: yeah they do want me to find a partner, but right now I'm not looking for a relationship
Her: I don't know why...do you feel weird like if you stay single for a long time that you will probably never find someone or you're not interested in find someone?
Me: I'm not worried about that.
Her: why? you don't want to get married?
Me: right now? no. If I meet the right girl then maybe
Her: at what age would you get married? when you're 30?
Me: yea I'd like to at least wait until my 30s but the whole dating thing is different for guys and girls and for me I'm happy with the way things are going right now and actually I just recently got out a relationship so I'm happy being single and exploring. But do you think it's different for guys and girls like the dating expectations?
Her: Yea! For guys, dating is kind of easy, just ask girls out and get some going
Her: but for girls you have to think, you have to prepare and how you can maintain the relationship, I think guys they just enjoy the moment and they don't have to think about the future.
Her: I think guys don't have to put any effort to maintiain the relationship and girls have to think about the future and it's definitely annoying.
Her: I'm definitely an overthinker
Me: There is one thing that I'm jealous of about girls though.
Me: Do you know girls can have 8 different kinds of orgasms?
Her: 8? like what kind of 8?
Me: Ok so...most girls don't even know, most guys don't know, this most girls don't know this.
Me: So the first one is called the mental orgasm. maybe you've never experienced this. But maybe if you've had an erotic dream. There's also hypnosis. do you know what that is?
Her: No
Me: Well you can train a girl to go into a state of hypnosis and have her orgasm, but that's a complex topic and I dont' even want to get into that.
Her: Oh my god that sounds so sophisticated!
Me: and then there's the breasts orgasm.
Her: what does that mean? if I take breasts then I can have orgasms with someone? Me: well some girls like to have their breasts nibbled lightly, some girls like a circular motion.
Me: But again, not every girl can orgasm with the breast
Her: what do you mean? orgasm by someone else's breasts?
Me: like someone is stimulating her breasts, but it's not a very strong orgasm
Me: Then there's also the clitoral which everyone knows about, right? ANd a lot of people can't find it but a guy can stick his tongue in to the opening, go up until they feel a knob, and you have to be really gentle at first because it's sensitive.
Her: yeah
Me: And then there's the g-spot which is very famous. and the way to stimulate that is a come hither motion and some girls also like a side to side. (demonstrate with my fingers)
Me: and if you go further up, it's called the A-spot. and this is if you have long fingers, or you can stimulate it with a really big dick
Her: hahah
Me: and then you have the deep spot....which is from doggystyle
Me: And then the final one, do you know what it is?
Me: It's called the full-body orgasm. And there's a couple ways to do that. One is through tantra it's a really fascinating topic. The other way is if you give a girl many orgasms and the all melt into one and she's in a state of bliss and the last way, at least that I know of, is also through hypnosis.
Her: Why you learn so much theory...you never like...?
Me: what?
Her: Does boys do research like this?
Me: Well people learn from many different ways. This is just from my...
Me: well I mean it's a fascinating topic. I wouldn't be as passionate about gardening as I would be about sex..
Me: Yea do you know tantra it's this kind of thing where...well when I decided to cut out religion and there was something that I found in buddhism it's a kind of sex that's really emotionally intense and surreal. It's not physical actually it shows you that sex can be nonphysical as well.
Me; There's a demonstration, I could show you actually— (Trying to use Teevter's tantric sex gambit)
Her: Nooo
Me: it's not tantric sex
Her: Nooo hahah
Me: ok whatever it's not a big deal
Her: that's so weird!
Her: I don't know why...do you feel weird like if you stay single for a long time that you will probably never find someone or you're not interested in find someone?
Me: I'm not worried about that.
Her: why? you don't want to get married?
Me: right now? no. If I meet the right girl then maybe
Her: at what age would you get married? when you're 30?
Me: yea I'd like to at least wait until my 30s but the whole dating thing is different for guys and girls and for me I'm happy with the way things are going right now and actually I just recently got out a relationship so I'm happy being single and exploring. But do you think it's different for guys and girls like the dating expectations?
Her: Yea! For guys, dating is kind of easy, just ask girls out and get some going
Her: but for girls you have to think, you have to prepare and how you can maintain the relationship, I think guys they just enjoy the moment and they don't have to think about the future.
Her: I think guys don't have to put any effort to maintiain the relationship and girls have to think about the future and it's definitely annoying.
Her: I'm definitely an overthinker
Me: There is one thing that I'm jealous of about girls though.
Me: Do you know girls can have 8 different kinds of orgasms?
Her: 8? like what kind of 8?
Me: Ok so...most girls don't even know, most guys don't know, this most girls don't know this.
Me: So the first one is called the mental orgasm. maybe you've never experienced this. But maybe if you've had an erotic dream. There's also hypnosis. do you know what that is?
Her: No
Me: Well you can train a girl to go into a state of hypnosis and have her orgasm, but that's a complex topic and I dont' even want to get into that.
Her: Oh my god that sounds so sophisticated!
Me: and then there's the breasts orgasm.
Her: what does that mean? if I take breasts then I can have orgasms with someone? Me: well some girls like to have their breasts nibbled lightly, some girls like a circular motion.
Me: But again, not every girl can orgasm with the breast
Her: what do you mean? orgasm by someone else's breasts?
Me: like someone is stimulating her breasts, but it's not a very strong orgasm
Me: Then there's also the clitoral which everyone knows about, right? ANd a lot of people can't find it but a guy can stick his tongue in to the opening, go up until they feel a knob, and you have to be really gentle at first because it's sensitive.
Her: yeah
Me: And then there's the g-spot which is very famous. and the way to stimulate that is a come hither motion and some girls also like a side to side. (demonstrate with my fingers)
Me: and if you go further up, it's called the A-spot. and this is if you have long fingers, or you can stimulate it with a really big dick
Her: hahah
Me: and then you have the deep spot....which is from doggystyle
Me: And then the final one, do you know what it is?
Me: It's called the full-body orgasm. And there's a couple ways to do that. One is through tantra it's a really fascinating topic. The other way is if you give a girl many orgasms and the all melt into one and she's in a state of bliss and the last way, at least that I know of, is also through hypnosis.
Her: Why you learn so much theory...you never like...?
Me: what?
Her: Does boys do research like this?
Me: Well people learn from many different ways. This is just from my...
Me: well I mean it's a fascinating topic. I wouldn't be as passionate about gardening as I would be about sex..
Me: Yea do you know tantra it's this kind of thing where...well when I decided to cut out religion and there was something that I found in buddhism it's a kind of sex that's really emotionally intense and surreal. It's not physical actually it shows you that sex can be nonphysical as well.
Me; There's a demonstration, I could show you actually— (Trying to use Teevter's tantric sex gambit)
Her: Nooo
Me: it's not tantric sex
Her: Nooo hahah
Me: ok whatever it's not a big deal
Her: that's so weird!
I change the subject asking her what comes next for her and she says she'll live in the city and find someone to settle down with at some point and she plans things once at a time as it goes along.
Her: I don't overthink things except for relationships. and sometimes my roommate will think I don't her and I just shut off the emotional part.
Me: Why do you think that is?
Her: Because I don't think it's necessary to think I just enjoy what I have but when it comes to relationships that becomes super hard to plan out
Me: Hmm yea, I think I'm the opposite actually. When it comes to goals I plan them out and with relationships, I just like to go with the flow
Her: Yea I think most of guys are like that
Me: (realized that I fucked up since she was complaining about how guys just take it easy with relationship) I will say though that my last relationship was really stressing me out
Her: what was the girl's background?
Me: she was from China. She was a little bit older than me which I don't care but I didn't want to waste her time, which was stressing me out
Her; I don't see myself marrying a foreigner. I'd just like my race chinese or... yea just chinese because if we get into the fight then
Me: —you can argue with them properly
Her: Yea because with a foreigner boyfriend I cannot express myself. So I'd rather have a chinese because I think communication is important. It's called "chinese word" I don't want my feelings to be ignored because I cannot express them.
Her: So you don't mind marrying foreigner? And what about white, black, indian, etc... you have any preference?
Me: I like them all
Her: No preference?
Me: Yea I've been on dates with all of them. I'm very open-minded. To me it's not so much the race that matters
Her: Yea but actually for like something something you become something like your race
Me: w0t
Her: no I mean like something for example if you're chinese, girl will think you're hard working
Me: So stereotypes?
Her: yea...No!! I mean like...AGH see this is why I cannot find a foreigner boyfriend
Her: omg
Me: so what do you mean
Her: So for example if you're dating chinese girl she's probably really considerate and willing to make sacrifice but if you date a white girl or a black girl they're more hyper and more wild and more open nature. Because if they want sex, they will just speak it out. where as if I'm horny I wouldn't
Her: I would ask him. I will not be the one initiate
Me: I will say sometimes the girl will just jump your bones
Her: Like straightforward. That's why I cannot date foreigners
Me: Sometimes when my ex was horny, she would just look at me and say "when are you gonna fuck me"
Her: Yea that's so different. I could not do that
Me: So you're the shy innocent type
Her: Yaa and foreigners they cannot stand that
Me: They can't stand that? Really?
Her: Yea they probably think I'm too conservative
Me: what do you mean by conservative
Her: like old-fashioned. but I don't want to change. I don't see the point to date teh foreigners
Me: I like a girl that's submissive, but when I say submissive, I don't mean a girl that will do everything you say. what I mean is a girl that is submitting to her desires
Her: mhm
Me: That kind of a girl. I guess it goes back to purity, the girl that can be true to her desires. and however she likes to expresses it whether she is the open type or the shy type, I don't care, as long as she is the type that is submissive to her desires
Her: Yea...it's hard for me
Me: what do you enjoy? Do you enjoy role-playing or fantasies?
Her: Do you mean making out? Yea I do like making out, but I do not like having sex without deep connections. But making out is fine. it's not a big deal.
Me: and what I mean during sex what kind of things do you like? Her: what kind of things do you like? so weird?
Me: Explains roleplaying to her and she gets it finally. I ask her if she's ever had a boss and employee fantasy
Me: Looks around as it's gotten dark. I love the lights at night. Do you have a nice view in your apartment?
Her: Yea [describes the view]
Me: shall we go for a walk?
Her: yea shall we go home?
Me: what do you have going on the rest of the day?
Her: well my roommates and I kind of have a curfew at 8pm.
Me: Why do you think that is?
Her: Because I don't think it's necessary to think I just enjoy what I have but when it comes to relationships that becomes super hard to plan out
Me: Hmm yea, I think I'm the opposite actually. When it comes to goals I plan them out and with relationships, I just like to go with the flow
Her: Yea I think most of guys are like that
Me: (realized that I fucked up since she was complaining about how guys just take it easy with relationship) I will say though that my last relationship was really stressing me out
Her: what was the girl's background?
Me: she was from China. She was a little bit older than me which I don't care but I didn't want to waste her time, which was stressing me out
Her; I don't see myself marrying a foreigner. I'd just like my race chinese or... yea just chinese because if we get into the fight then
Me: —you can argue with them properly
Her: Yea because with a foreigner boyfriend I cannot express myself. So I'd rather have a chinese because I think communication is important. It's called "chinese word" I don't want my feelings to be ignored because I cannot express them.
Her: So you don't mind marrying foreigner? And what about white, black, indian, etc... you have any preference?
Me: I like them all
Her: No preference?
Me: Yea I've been on dates with all of them. I'm very open-minded. To me it's not so much the race that matters
Her: Yea but actually for like something something you become something like your race
Me: w0t
Her: no I mean like something for example if you're chinese, girl will think you're hard working
Me: So stereotypes?
Her: yea...No!! I mean like...AGH see this is why I cannot find a foreigner boyfriend
Her: omg
Me: so what do you mean
Her: So for example if you're dating chinese girl she's probably really considerate and willing to make sacrifice but if you date a white girl or a black girl they're more hyper and more wild and more open nature. Because if they want sex, they will just speak it out. where as if I'm horny I wouldn't
Her: I would ask him. I will not be the one initiate
Me: I will say sometimes the girl will just jump your bones
Her: Like straightforward. That's why I cannot date foreigners
Me: Sometimes when my ex was horny, she would just look at me and say "when are you gonna fuck me"
Her: Yea that's so different. I could not do that
Me: So you're the shy innocent type
Her: Yaa and foreigners they cannot stand that
Me: They can't stand that? Really?
Her: Yea they probably think I'm too conservative
Me: what do you mean by conservative
Her: like old-fashioned. but I don't want to change. I don't see the point to date teh foreigners
Me: I like a girl that's submissive, but when I say submissive, I don't mean a girl that will do everything you say. what I mean is a girl that is submitting to her desires
Her: mhm
Me: That kind of a girl. I guess it goes back to purity, the girl that can be true to her desires. and however she likes to expresses it whether she is the open type or the shy type, I don't care, as long as she is the type that is submissive to her desires
Her: Yea...it's hard for me
Me: what do you enjoy? Do you enjoy role-playing or fantasies?
Her: Do you mean making out? Yea I do like making out, but I do not like having sex without deep connections. But making out is fine. it's not a big deal.
Me: and what I mean during sex what kind of things do you like? Her: what kind of things do you like? so weird?
Me: Explains roleplaying to her and she gets it finally. I ask her if she's ever had a boss and employee fantasy
Me: Looks around as it's gotten dark. I love the lights at night. Do you have a nice view in your apartment?
Her: Yea [describes the view]
Me: shall we go for a walk?
Her: yea shall we go home?
Me: what do you have going on the rest of the day?
Her: well my roommates and I kind of have a curfew at 8pm.
I asked her if she has to wake up early, and allegedly she wakes up at 6am. She says she's the type who only texts her friends if she needs something from them and they're the ones who reach out to her to keep her out of her shell.
As we're walking to my train station, she brings up the topic of TV shows, it turns out she is a TV show fanatic. I was confused because when I first met her, she said she doesn't watch tv shows that much but now she says she's basically a couch potato. I say "oh yea we should watch a tv show sometime" she doesn't really respond to this and I just said it in passing and continued the convo. This might've been a dumb move, but I was also confused why she was talking about tv shows all of a sudden and was wondering if maybe she wanted me to pull.
What I did well
- Delivery of 8 orgasms routine was mostly decent. Talking about the clit orgasm was a little awkward but otherwise I sounded like I knew my shit. But I don't know if she was turned on by it.
- After the purity gambit and related discussion, she was stroking her hair and seemed to be in a contemplative mood
What I could do better
- I should make it a point to always seed everything I want for the pull at the beginning of the date, so talk about tv shows, talk about cool stuff you recently got at your apartment, etc... So then I can pull whenever I see the chance.
- I don't know why my dates always last 90 minutes before the pull or before ending. Around the 60 min mark is when I finished delivering the 8 orgasms routine. This is way too long
- Get in a 3rd venue! Decide to move from the second venue to the third after you talk about the purity gambit
- Tantric sex gambit did not work out as planned. I should've just scrapped that for now.
- I didn't do much Kino on her other than the occasional touch on her shoulder and knee.
- The sexual framing she did after the failed tantra demo was very bad for the date.
- Very little Kino. ugh. This is a big problem in my game probably.