Uninvited dude joined our date and cockblocked me. Lessions learned.

[Igor]

Couple of days ago I was asking out a girl at the sports club where I usually train. When I spoke to her another guy starting to join our conversation. After I left they continued talking, from a distance I could see that they were exchanging contacts. Tonight we had the date, we took a seat outside and had some talk. Everything fine, but suddenly this guy from the sports club showed up and starts to sit beside her. Turns out that he was asking her to join our meeting on instagram and she said yes, without letting me know that.

So after he came he started to take over the conversation to himself and the girl. While I tried to tell something I tried to discuss me that I was wrong, blah blah. For me it felt that he was trying to lower me down to impress her. But yeah, I didn't expect that he would join our date, and I left after 1 hour because I saw that he was getting closer and closer to her and that was frustrating me a lot.

This guy, I know him for months but we barely speak to each other because he mostly doesn't interact with men but when there is a women around he becomes very social and super competitive. I heard from other men that they were complaining about him, taking girls but officially he doing nothing wrong.

But what can I do the next time. How can I plan a date with a girl, knowing for sure that there will be no uninvited guests ruining our night.

 

[samanil]

That sounds pretty shitty. But hey, at least you took some action and got a meet up, even if you didn't get too far.

Seems like maybe the girl didn't know you were proposing a romantic date, and thought it was just a friendly get together? If so you need to work on how you're coming across to women--fundamentals, as well as the technical aspects of approaching and asking a chick out (many great articles on these topics).

 

[TomInHo]

I don't believe your story OP

Looked up your posting history, because this sounded too similar to another odd post I saw earlier. And was a bit surprised that every single one of your posts was about men AMOGing you.

Idk, because you're either the unluckiest man alive that others love to pick on, or something else is up

I sincerely hope you're not trolling

 

[Will_V]

Couple of days ago I was asking out a girl at the sports club where I usually train. When I spoke to her another guy starting to join our conversation. After I left they continued talking, from a distance I could see that they were exchanging contacts. Tonight we had the date, we took a seat outside and had some talk. Everything fine, but suddenly this guy from the sports club showed up and starts to sit beside her. Turns out that he was asking her to join our meeting on instagram and she said yes, without letting me know that.

So after he came he started to take over the conversation to himself and the girl. While I tried to tell something I tried to discuss me that I was wrong, blah blah. For me it felt that he was trying to lower me down to impress her. But yeah, I didn't expect that he would join our date, and I left after 1 hour because I saw that he was getting closer and closer to her and that was frustrating me a lot.

This guy, I know him for months but we barely speak to each other because he mostly doesn't interact with men but when there is a women around he becomes very social and super competitive. I heard from other men that they were complaining about him, taking girls but officially he doing nothing wrong.

But what can I do the next time. How can I plan a date with a girl, knowing for sure that there will be no uninvited guests ruining our night.

Why didn't you simply reject this three way? Ask the girl "who's this guy?" and when she says what happened go "well I'm here to meet you not him, if you want to sit here and chat with him let me know, I have other things to do". And just ignore him when he tries to talk some shit about that.

There's no way you have to accept a random dude joining your date, it's incredibly rude on her part to invite him.

I don't believe your story OP

Looked up your posting history, because this sounded too similar to another odd post I saw earlier. And was a bit surprised that every single one of your posts was about men AMOGing you.

Idk, because you're either the unluckiest man alive the other love to pick on, or something else is up

I sincerely hope you're not trolling

Sounds like it could be the same dude as last time.

But yeah, if every post is about amoging something is clearly wrong with the general frame.

 

[Igor]

That sounds pretty shitty. But hey, at least you took some action and got a meet up, even if you didn't get too far.

Seems like maybe the girl didn't know you were proposing a romantic date, and thought it was just a friendly get together? If so you need to work on how you're coming across to women--fundamentals, as well as the technical aspects of approaching and asking a chick out (many great articles on these topics).

I see it as a learning moment, that's why I post it here. I need feedback on this. To be honest, it is affecting my confidence because I just started to become less anxious to speak with women because I have SAD. But if I have to deal with those guys who are super social, high energy and alpha, it kills my confidence. Note is that I'm older than most men but I have almost 0 experience with women.

Why didn't you simply reject this three way? Ask the girl "who's this guy?" and when she says what happened go "well I'm here to meet you not him, if you want to sit here and chat with him let me know, I have other things to do". And just ignore him when he tries to talk some shit about that.

There's no way you have to accept a random dude joining your date, it's incredibly rude on her part to invite him.



Sounds like it could be the same dude as last time.

But yeah, if every post is about amoging something is clearly wrong with the general frame.

Yeah, it is the same guy unfortunately. I know his face for month but we barely speak each other 1:1 because he never ask questions back or walks away when I try to have a deeper convo with him.

For the girl, I guess since she was new and we just met that she would keep her options open or that this guy was just a friend or something. She ofc didn't that he is the type of guy who's hitting on every girl he sees. It could also be that she didn't saw it as a date, but of for me it killed the opportunity to build further attraction because he was claiming all the attention.

This is not the first time such incidents happen. Couple years ago I was talking with a girl, just some chit chat because we just met and I didn't want to flirt with her in the first minute, and than suddenly another guest tries to join our conversation, injecting his opinion and in the end he was moving seats to sit beside her (while I was opposite) and starting to ask personal questions about her and getting her IG.