Unlocking the Human hypocrisy. Why you should not be happy!

[trashKENNUT]

Hi Guys,

(One of few my blog post in the near distance future.)

The Law of Attraction gurus said "Be happy" and that things will come to you. The thing is survey has shown that the happiest people in the world are living in the poorest country, or third world countries.

So what's going on?

I been studying, reading, learning, relating my past failures. I come to a conclusion. and this is it. I finally read what those legendary people meant. But the thing is i do not believe it but every moment of my life, it always represents this pattern.

Now, as Eckhart Toile (one of few examples) also said. You are not your thoughts.

Just some examples to consider my retarded philosophy.

1)When you reward bad behavior or you help people too much, they associate you with negativity. Why? They think you the problem when it's their belief system. Because they can only control their perception!

2)You see bullies and you hate them. and you end up being a bully years later. Why? Because you perceive (see/observe) the bully, and feel from it. Feel love or feel like shit, doesn't matter. Whatever feelings + object and you have a representation, even if it is something you do not want.

3)Why being in a state or being happy doesn't change your life? Because the object is to be in state, and you are in state. You achieve your goal But you do not get girls! You need to change another perception, another belief (like girls love sex) and then learn and apply tactics.

Zac

 

[Drck]

Hey Zac, I think I kind of understand the things you are talking about but I am not sure about the connections or what you are actually trying to say.

Be happy… Happiness is a state of mind, basically a positive mood. Most people (esp. in western society) associate happiness with things and people. Buy this car and you will be happy. Buy big house and you will be happy. Make six figures and be happy. Seduce that hot girl(s) and you will be happy. But it doesn’t work like that. Things or people won’t make you happy. If you are making $10 per hour you will be happy to make $100. After a while, the $100 will become normal, and you will want $300. So you get $300, but then you will want $500. Now imagine, you are making $500 and you lose your job, and you have to go working for “only” $100. Many people would be miserable because their mind was set to happiness = $500 and everything that is less than that is unhappiness. People actually commit suicide because of this, they make 20 million, lose 3 million and they fall into a deep depression. Or, you meet a cute girl and at first you are happy to talk to her, to kiss her, to spend some time with her. But after several months, when she denies you more dates and sex you will be in total misery…

Eastern philosophies are much more advanced; they recognize happiness as a “state of mind”. They recognize that ATTACHMENTS to different things and people cause this misery. They purposely “remove” the ATTACHMENTS to things and people, thus by default the mind will become happy, meaning it will move into its normal and natural state – regardless whether you are poor or rich, whether you are alone or with hottest girl. You can be poor and be miserable, or you can be rich and be miserable. The same is with being happy. It is not actually the money that make you that way, it is the attachment to money…

Now, people like happiness, positive emotions. If you are happy and positive they will come to you. If you are depressed, miserable and negative, they will move away from you…

I agree that “you are not your thoughts” to a certain degree. Better way to put it is, “you can chose what thoughts will be predominant in your mind, and these thoughts will become parts of your personality”. For example, you can change negative thoughts “Nothing is working out, everything sucks and I will never success, trying to do anything is pointless” to positive thoughts “Things are working out and success is on my way because I work on it hard every day, and it worth’s doing even more”. These thoughts will eventually change your actions and behavior, they will change the way you look at people and how people look at you. Changing these simple thoughts will change your life, it might take some time for them to become predominant, but they will. By changing your thoughts and behavior you will simply develop new habits.

When you reward bad behavior you are reinforcing bad behavior. If you steal $5 from me and I tell you that you are a great person, and give you additional $2 – wouldn’t you want to steal even more? You would, and next time you’d steal $20. If she doesn’t do what you suggest, would you pay for her lunch? Well, if you do you are basically rewarding her bad behavior. She thinks “I don’t have to do anything at all, I can reject him - and he is still paying for everything anyway. Why not let him pay?” Sounds funny but look around and see how many guys are doing exactly that. Don’t reward bad behavior, reward only good one…

When you help people too much they perceive you as “Nice”, too supplicating, person who tries to do a lot for others so they can say good things about you. They think you are seeking their approval, thus view you as person with low-self-esteem, someone who is trying to impress. Some people will reward you back. Most will wipe their shoes on you…

If you were bullied and you bully years later, it is because you want to revenge your pain on someone else. Let someone else suffer. Other people keep the pain inside, they would never hurt others. Same with love – some are loved and they share the love with others later on. Others are loved and all they know is to become narcissistic…

Being in certain “State of Mind” will not get you girls but it might make it much easier. You also have to include behavior. If you sit in the chair and your “state of mind” is “I am happy and getting rich”, the money won’t fall in your lap itself just because you are happy. You have to get up, talk to people who do business, learn about finances and open up a business – with that state of mind…

If you only sit on a chair and enjoying being “happy” girls won’t come to you, take your pants off and jump on your dick. You also have to include some behavior. You have to go out and talk to them, you have to lead them to your place with intention to nail them, and you have to lead them with your “state of mind” – which should be relaxed, sexy and horny, because she will simply mirror your state of mind… On the other hand, if you just do the right behavior but your state of mind is “I don’t really want sex, we will not having sex” and you are all uptight about it – guess what, the odds that it will happen are also very low…

 

[trashKENNUT]

Drck,

If you were bullied and you bully years later, it is because you want to revenge your pain on someone else. Let someone else suffer. Other people keep the pain inside, they would never hurt others. Same with love – some are loved and they share the love with others later on. Others are loved and all they know is to become narcissistic…

But in essence, your focus is on the object itself, bullying. Some people become narcissistic, passive aggressive but why? When i realize the world is based on objective universe, i finally understood. They are still perceiving and operating from that belief, which is already rusty now. They hold it in, but it has to be replace.

Our beliefs has to be replace. Examples of bad habits like Facebook, you have to find another excitement, once things are established. We use oil to power cars. Soon, we have to find a replacement.

You have to replace it if you do not want it, or you move backwards in life, like logging in to Facebook once more. It's scary, but i seen it myself. (Sorry for be abit too crazy.)

Being in certain “State of Mind” will not get you girls but it might make it much easier. You also have to include behavior. If you sit in the chair and your “state of mind” is “I am happy and getting rich”, the money won’t fall in your lap itself just because you are happy. You have to get up, talk to people who do business, learn about finances and open up a business – with that state of mind…

Being in a "state of mind" does not get you girls, but this is where most people are stuck. The "End result" is so important. Most people go in life working hard, but in their minds, they are not there yet, or they on the way there. They use their conscious mind, which is the "You" to do the hard work, but you can only willpower for awhile.

The problem is when your mind is "on the way there", It will reflect "on the way there". It's abit fuck up but that's reality sometimes, with it's literal sarcasm.

because she will simply mirror your state of mind… On the other hand, if you just do the right behavior but your state of mind is “I don’t really want sex, we will not having sex” and you are all uptight about it – guess what, the odds that it will happen are also very low…

This is different, and not on psychology totally. Yes girls will mirror you but strength lies when she starts behaving differently. This is where you do the "eh" and not be fazed by her reaction.

Because you perceive that she is already yours.

(Sorry i just feel abit liberated and i am too blatant here.)

Zac

 

[Drck]

Quite an insightful picture and deep thougts. You are following very peculiar path. I know this path, I was on it so long, and I don't even know anymore, maybe I'm still on it...

When somebody is hurt (bullying is not the only thing that hurts), they feel lots of pain. The primitive mechanisms of our minds are trying to get rid of the pain - the person either becomes bully himself or he will keep the pain within and try to sublimate it by e.g becoming servant, or trying to dissolve the pain in good feelings. He may try to overcompensate in some area. For example, he may become a strong fighter, great seducer, or religious person. And true, it depends on what is the person's belief. If he believes that it is ok to hurt others and that he should return the pain, he will either bully the same person or another one. If his belief is that he should never hurt anyone, he will keep it in him and try to sublimate it in some area... The pain is then dissolved, or unloaded if you wish.

The pain can also be rationalized. For example, a guy who was hurt may realize that hurting/bullying others is not the right thing to do, but because he is more aggressive he goes and joins boxing club. This way he can get rid of the pain, he can unload the pain in fights but with the right people.

So you are right that you have to replace it; your brain actually does it anyway, it tries to remove the pain automatically. In analogy, you can compare it to a child who touches a hot stove because he believes it is harmless. He doesn't really have to really think that much about it, but his brain will automatically remove his hand and makes sure that he will remember it for the rest of his life. The believe also changes, now the brain not only believes but it also knows that the hot stove really hurts...

You can enjoy the Journey or you can enjoy the Destination, it is up to you. Some people enjoy more of the seduction process, others enjoy getting laid. Nobody says you can't enjoy both....

What do you mean by "objective universe"? Typically, a person (scientist) views objective universe as something that is outside of him. The environment he lives in, the trees, water, gravity, stars... Simply mass, distance and time. He then thinks that everything he perceives and feels is subjective - his thoughts, imagination, feelings... He views the world as subjective and objective, as inside and outside. But there is also another way to look at "objective universe" - basically, everything you perceive (including your thoughts, feelings, ...) is viewed as objective. There is no longer "subject", what is left is only Awareness - and the surrounding world...

 

[trashKENNUT]

Drck,

What do you mean by "objective universe"?

Given few examples.

1)An example of a depressive thought would be "i want to get out of this universe". I don't advice people to try that. Because it's disconnecting. But if you look at it objectively, the whole thing is disconnecting at thought level and at feelings level, it is very hard to describe.

I believe people who have gone through depression and still occasionally has depression, will know what i say here.

2)Look at anything in your life. We are progressive. We think we are not, but at thought level, we are.

Erm, let's say about people who are bitter.
- They are still operating from an old belief which no longer works.

Another example would be soccer team who employ a passing game.
- Everytime when a team who play a passing game lose, The public complain that they pass too much. But the thing is, and what most people don't see is that they already achieve their goal. They just forgot why the passing game was for, which is to WIN!

So like example, why be in "state" doesn't get you girls, is because the object/objective here is to be in "state". and you are already in "state". Getting girls is another belief altogether. Creating a new belief like "girls love sex", so that it helps you further with your practical skills, rather than willpower yourself to death.

3)EXample of a guy who's bullied. He leave his friends only to find new friends who are bullies as well.

It's like wherever he goes, he still got bullied. It's because he gives the perception that he wants to be bullied.

Conclusion, Every moment in your life is this:

You (Perception/Focus) = Object + Emotion (Any emotion)

I guess that's why people say Perception is everything. Because you can only control your perception and that everything is "truth". "Truth" is Object + Emotion.

One might say to me that humans cannot fly or that pigs can't fly. In order to not be too "crazy" and because our minds have to be stable, we accept that humans cannot fly or pigs can't fly, for now. But slowly impossibilities are becoming possible. So we have to relax our brain. We don't want to lie to ourselves with our brains because there are limitations in the "linear world"/reality. If you notice, people who are crazy in mental hospitals are just people who cloud reality with their own beliefs.

So a guy like me, it's important for me to not cloud reality by being bias. It's important. Because i am digging into the core of things.

Zac

 

[Drck]

Hi Zac,

The guy is bullied from different people because he is projecting weakness. He is too shy, too nice, too weak, he is not assertive enough. Once he learns to project strength, boldness and assertiveness, all the bullies will magically disappear. There are not many people in this world who dare to fuck with strong guy…

As far as depression, I guess the expression “be happy” or “happiness” is incorrect. People should not seek “happiness” per se, rather “natural state of mind”. The reason is that happiness is rather temporal state of mind which comes and goes. When you suddenly get higher salary, you become excited and happy – but later on your happiness fades away. You get a new girl and you are happy – but then the happiness fades away and you will have to seek new excitement to remain “happy”…

The problem with western society is that everyone is seeking happiness. As I already wrote above, see for example all the advertisements: Buy this car and it will make you happy. Buy this house and you will be happy. Seduce this 8/10 girl and you will be happy. That is a pure foolishness, it is a LIE. It is insanity of western civilization. Things or people might get you excited temporarily but they will not make you happy. People are CHASING happiness and they can never catch it, because it simply doesn’t exist…

It is like with girls - Stop CHASING girls and they will come to you. Stop CHASING happiness and it will come to you. The more you chase happiness the more you get depressed because you simply can’t catch it. When you stop chasing it and desiring it, your mind will calm down, and this calmness is “natural state of mind”. Once you get passed the idea that you must have things and people that will make you happy, your mind will relax, and with some practice you will feel bliss, joy… This state of mind is true happiness because there is no attachment to external objects (things, people, girls,…). This bliss is permanent, it doesn’t fade away because it is not dependent on external objects…

True, beliefs have to do a lot with depression. If your core belief is that you have to have that great car and great girl, that you are entitled to them but you don’t really have them – you will eventually become depressed, angry and bitter. If your core belief changes and now you believe that you don’t need great cars and hot girls to be happy, that you can be happy without them – well, that will also become your reality.

Game is Game. If you believe that you must win, that winning is the only thing that matters, you will lose all the enjoyment from the Game. You will stress, you will be anxious, and if you lose the Game you will become depressed. If you win, your “happiness” will be only temporal anyway, you will have seek more and more wins to satisfy your “happiness”…

The same with Girls. If you believe that you must nail her, ok, it is great, you might eventually nail some girl. But mostly you will get too stressed and too anxious about it, and if you don’t nail her you will become depressed. If you don’t have the joy from seduction, from interaction with her, it will be very difficult to seduce her at first place. But if you learn to enjoy the seduction with the intention to nail her, you will raise your chances multiple fold…

It is like a balance. Many guys who are new to seduction business get overwhelmed with the whole seduction process. They learn 100 times more about seduction than they really need to get laid, and because it is all new and exciting stuff they naturally want to master it. They become too busy with the seduction process that they forget the primary purpose – to get laid. There is a lot of imbalance here because the primary focus is on seduction and not on getting laid.

Seduction is quite simple. You go out and you have fun with girls, you simply talk to them. Once you talk to them, she might or might not be interested. If she is interested she will give you lots of signs, and all you have to do is to keep pushing things further, with each of your step you should be getting closer and closer to your place, with the intention to nail her. If she is not interested she will also give you lots of signs. Oh well, you simply stop chasing her and let her go, wishing her all the best in her life…

But seducers also fall into this trap of this “happiness”. They learn the seduction process and they can seduce the girl. They go out every single day and they “seduce”, they ask hundreds of girls for phone numbers and they go for tens of dates. Then they finally seduce. How great. Ok, but one seduced girl doesn’t make them happy. They need 3 more. Then they need 20 more, 50 and finally 100. But 100 seduced girls doesn’t make them happy either, now they need multiple fold. What for? Maybe because more of these seduced girls will make them more “happy”? Or is it the feeling that they are “better” than other guys? Pure foolishness…

 

[trashKENNUT]

Drck,

The guy is bullied from different people because he is projecting weakness. He is too shy, too nice, too weak, he is not assertive enough. Once he learns to project strength, boldness and assertiveness, all the bullies will magically disappear. There are not many people in this world who dare to fuck with strong guy…

As far as depression, I guess the expression “be happy” or “happiness” is incorrect. People should not seek “happiness” per se, rather “natural state of mind”. The reason is that happiness is rather temporal state of mind which comes and goes. When you suddenly get higher salary, you become excited and happy – but later on your happiness fades away. You get a new girl and you are happy – but then the happiness fades away and you will have to seek new excitement to remain “happy”…

The problem with western society is that everyone is seeking happiness. As I already wrote above, see for example all the advertisements: Buy this car and it will make you happy. Buy this house and you will be happy. Seduce this 8/10 girl and you will be happy. That is a pure foolishness, it is a LIE. It is insanity of western civilization. Things or people might get you excited temporarily but they will not make you happy. People are CHASING happiness and they can never catch it, because it simply doesn’t exist…

I like the different thoughts we have here.

I think there are people who mess with strong guys. I guess this is where practical stuff, like martial arts is important, to defend yourself. You need to defend yourself in reality. You don't just stand there and "be happy" and he will not punch you. :/

It's not just western society. It is that it is everybody's problem, even in Asia.

It is like a balance. Many guys who are new to seduction business get overwhelmed with the whole seduction process. They learn 100 times more about seduction than they really need to get laid, and because it is all new and exciting stuff they naturally want to master it. They become too busy with the seduction process that they forget the primary purpose – to get laid. There is a lot of imbalance here because the primary focus is on seduction and not on getting laid.

Seduction is quite simple. You go out and you have fun with girls, you simply talk to them. Once you talk to them, she might or might not be interested. If she is interested she will give you lots of signs, and all you have to do is to keep pushing things further, with each of your step you should be getting closer and closer to your place, with the intention to nail her. If she is not interested she will also give you lots of signs. Oh well, you simply stop chasing her and let her go, wishing her all the best in her life…

But seducers also fall into this trap of this “happiness”. They learn the seduction process and they can seduce the girl. They go out every single day and they “seduce”, they ask hundreds of girls for phone numbers and they go for tens of dates. Then they finally seduce. How great. Ok, but one seduced girl doesn’t make them happy. They need 3 more. Then they need 20 more, 50 and finally 100. But 100 seduced girls doesn’t make them happy either, now they need multiple fold. What for? Maybe because more of these seduced girls will make them more “happy”? Or is it the feeling that they are “better” than other guys? Pure foolishness…

Seduction is not simple. I really want to say this. It's like most "Law of attraction gurus", to say to a poor person to visualize a whipped potato and it will appear. The thing is it will not appear at that very moment! But unfortunately, the whole market is geared like that.

YEa, you right. Richard La Ruina or Gambler, He said that girls should not make you happy. Because there are so many friends he knew, that slept with 100s and 200s of girl, and they are not happy. It's important to know it's just a game.

But important here, and i emphasize again. is the whole process of life. Every moment is always : You (Perception) = Object + Emotion. This is for me, at least.
We are living in an objective universe. As one simple example, like meditation. Even meditation itself is an object + emotion. Feeling.

Appreciate the thoughts here. I don't want to go further. We might make this into book of theory. TOo many words.

Zac