FU Unsure what to do, Things were awkward.

[Learningempathy]

Okay guys so just a bit about myself. I am nearly 25, still a virgin. I grew religious and so had planned to wait until marriage however I recently(1 year) changed my views so I'm pretty late to the dating game. I had only ever dated a few girls who were very conservative. Okay now to the report

It's start outed last weekend, I went to a party with some friends and during the party I met some girl. She was pretty cute and we ended up exchanging information. Fast forward a couple of days and we are texting and we end of planning a date for Saturday. I use Chase articles about how to text and where we set up a date and I we end agreeing to hang out at her place, and eat pizza. So near the beginning I kind of psyched myself out. I read that in of Chase articles that once you are in a seclusive area try at least kiss the girl within the first 10 minutes or so. So as time keeps passing by and I haven't made a move or anything I panic abit. I do end up making out with her but it's like an hour and half into the date and she was already half laying atop of me(we were watching a show on her couch). So things get a bit heavy, I start feeling her up and she is doing the same, but when I try to escalate furhther she gives me some resistance and says that she hardly knows me and we weren't going to farther. So I kind of try to cool off for Abit and continue later but I kind of keep meeting the same resistance. The mood kind of starts dying there and I kind am unsure how to bring it back. It doesn't help that the show in the background is one she likes a lot. Anyway after that thingd kind got real awkward, at least for me. She gets tired and ask if I want to spend the night because it's late, I say sure( though I think shouldn't left I just didn't know what else to say) and we go to her bed. I kind of tried here to get the mood going again once we are there but she to tired and I really don't what to do. We spoon during the night and we during the morning I try to escalate and get in theOkay guys so just a bit about myself. I am nearly 25, still a virgin. I grew religious and so had planned to wait until marriage however I recently(1 year) changed my views so I'm pretty late to the dating game. I had only ever dated a few girls who were very conservative. Okay now to the report

It's start outed Halloween weekend, I went to a party with some friends and during the party I met some girl. She was pretty cute and we ended up exchanging information. Fast forward a couple of days and we are texting and we end of planning a date for Saturday. I use Chase articles about how to text and where we set up a date and I we end agreeing to hang out at her place, and eat pizza. So near the beginning I kind of psyched myself out. I read that in of Chase articles that once you are in a seclusive area try at least kiss the girl within the first 10 minutes or so. So as time keeps passing by and I haven't made a move or anything I panic about. I do end up making out with her but it's like 1 and half into the date and she was already half laying atop of me(we were watching a show on her couch). So things get a bit heavy, I start feeling her up and she is doing the same, but when I try to escalate furhther she gives me some resistance and says that she hardly knows me and we weren't going to farther. So I kind of try to cool off for Abit and continue later but I kind of keep meeting the same resistance. The mood kind of starts dying there and I kind am unsure how to bring it back. It doesn't help that the show in the background is one she likes a lot. Anyway after that thinks kind got real awkward, at least for me. She gets tired and ask if I want to spend the night because it's late, I say sure( though I think shouldn't left I just didn't know what else to say) and we go to her bed. I kind of tried here to get the mood going again once we are there but she is to tired and I really don't know what to do. We spoon during the night and during the morning I try to escalate and get in the mood by a lot of touch and group but Iits really awkward because she is still sleepy and really puts little effort in. She is okay with me touching her and we kiss but she kinda just doesn't do anything. Anyway at one point she says she is sleepy and she kisses me, plays with my hair and says she likes me but if something was going to happen today it would probably happened already, kisses me again and rolls to side and takes a nap. So after that I kind just felt pretty shitty. I stayed there for awhile and once we were both fully awake I got dressed we kissed and hugged goodbye. And that was it.

Overall it was a pretty awkward experience and I kind of feel like crap especially about what happened at the end. Anyway I though I'd posted it so I can get any feedback and also to try and collect my thoughts on the whole thing.

 

[Learningempathy]

Okay guys so just a bit about myself. I am nearly 25, still a virgin. I grew religious and so had planned to wait until marriage however I recently(1 year) changed my views so I'm pretty late to the dating game. I had only ever dated a few girls who were very conservative. Okay now to the report

It's start outed last weekend, I went to a party with some friends and during the party I met some girl. She was pretty cute and we ended up exchanging information. Fast forward a couple of days and we are texting and we end of planning a date for Saturday. I use Chase articles about how to text and where we set up a date and I we end agreeing to hang out at her place, and eat pizza. So near the beginning I kind of psyched myself out. I read that in of Chase articles that once you are in a seclusive area try at least kiss the girl within the first 10 minutes or so. So as time keeps passing by and I haven't made a move or anything I panic abit. I do end up making out with her but it's like an hour and half into the date and she was already half laying atop of me(we were watching a show on her couch). So things get a bit heavy, I start feeling her up and she is doing the same, but when I try to escalate further she gives me some resistance and says that she hardly knows me and we weren't going to farther. So I kind of try to cool off for a bit and continue later but I kind of keep meeting the same resistance. The mood kind of starts dying there and I kind am unsure how to bring it back. It doesn't help that the show in the background is one she likes a lot. Anyway after that things kind got real awkward, at least for me. She gets tired and ask if I want to spend the night because it's late, I say sure( though I think shouldn't left I just didn't know what else to say) and we go to her bed. I kind of tried here to get the mood going again once we are there but she to tired and I really don't know what to do. We spoon during the night and during the morning I try to escalate and get in the mood by a lot of touch and group but Its really awkward because she is still sleepy and really puts little effort in. She is okay with me touching her and we kiss but she kinda just doesn't do anything. Anyway at one point she says she is sleepy and she kisses me, plays with my hair and says she likes me but if something was going to happen today it would probably happened already, kisses me again and rolls to side and takes a nap. So after that I kind just felt pretty shitty. I stayed there for awhile and once we were both fully awake I got dressed we kissed and hugged goodbye. And that was it.

Overall it was a pretty awkward experience and I kind of feel like crap especially about what happened at the end. Anyway I though I'd posted it so I can get any feedback and also to try and collect my thoughts on the whole thing.

Sorry didn't realized I posted it the way it was, and not sure how to edit so I just put the corrected version here.

 

[Sandman]

Sounds like classic last minute resistance.

General tips:

- Do not ever lose your cool or feel bad because a girl is resisting, just enjoy your time, even if it's just kissing a bit or touching

- Two steps forward one step backwards; when she resist a certain move (such as touching her pussy) go back to the point she wasn't resisting (e.g. touching her boobs) and escalate again.

Last minute resistance usually occurs when you don't do a good job of painting yourself as a sexual guy in my opinion. So next time, sexualise the interaction more you can do so by (sexual) chase frames, sex talk, touching. Although with touching it's best not to go full escalation mode in public especially if you're not gonna be able to pull her home right away.

 

[Learningempathy]

Thanks I appreciate the advice. Especially the two step forward thing, I'll definitely be sure to remember that next time. Yeah after I lost my cool I defintly felt like I kind of lost control of the whole situation. So you'd recommend being more the in the moment and smaller de-escalation rather than focusing to much on why she resistaning and what I should do?
On a site note.
I've been trying to work on my fundamentals this past few months. However's still kind of hard for me sometimes to feel like a more sexual person, again conservative background. So I still have that cognitive dissonance. But I'm working on it
Thanks again for the advice.

 

[Sandman]

Thanks I appreciate the advice. Especially the two step forward thing, I'll definitely be sure to remember that next time. Yeah after I lost my cool I defintly felt like I kind of lost control of the whole situation. So you'd recommend being more the in the moment and smaller de-escalation rather than focusing to much on why she resistaning and what I should do?
On a site note.
I've been trying to work on my fundamentals this past few months. However's still kind of hard for me sometimes to feel like a more sexual person, again conservative background. So I still have that cognitive dissonance. But I'm working on it
Thanks again for the advice.

Yes of course, in general, you're not gonna sway women with logic, women want to feel emotions, you have to create the right emotions with her, logic is just window dressing. So you can incorporate some logic such as saying it's too hot here for this while you take her pants the thing she responds to is emotions.

So she's resisting your escalation maybe because she's not horny enough or she's not comfortable enough or she thinks you are gonna judge her (anti-slut defence) there are ways you can decrease the chances of her feeling this way during the interaction but when it's time to escalate your best bet ia remain calm, non-needy and be in the moment.

I come from a very conservative background as well, try to change your mindset and continue to power through, once you get more successes you will internalize the new mindset (e.g. all girls want sex and it's okay).

Good luck