Visualization

[Marty]

I was reading recently about how Michael Phelps used visualization for years to prepare himself for Olympic conquest. Before going to sleep each night and every morning right after he woke up, he would imagine every detail of a successful race in his head—how it looked, felt, sounded—such that when it came to the event itself, he was mentally running a familiar routine.

Does anyone here use this technique for seduction and dating? In what way? I would imagine it could be applied to cold approach, no?

 

[TheWiseFool]

I haven't used it much in seduction and dating, but I use visualization often when I want my body to do sonething, such as get out of bed at 5 AM when I am too tired to do so or before races when I used to be a track runner.

Now that I think about it, I remember using visualization, it's in the first couple of posts in my journal. I was thinking, "what is it like to be a sexy man?" Regardless of whether or not I knew how a sexy man behaves, I took on the persona of one. I didn't think much, I just did and it made things really easy cos I felt so damn confident.

Definitely can be used in cold approach. Why? Visualization is giving your mind a reference experience minus the actual experience. In addition, the experiences are usually positive ones because you are suppose to imagine yourself succeeding haha. Your mind and body are preparing themselves to react to specific stimuli: what you expect to see, expect to hear, smell, touch, taste. Lowering your chances of trying something new and failing because you've "practiced" the scenario consistently. You know what you must do when you are:
1. walking down the street and a notice a pretty girl walking
2. what you say when you get up to her
3. what to say if she looks shy, looks friendly, feigning disinterest, actually disinterested
4. what to do at about 5-10 minutes into the conversation
5. noticing escalation windows or when to get her number
6. what you should do when you text
7. how to get from where you are to a location to close
8. what kind of sex you want to give and how it should sound like, feel like, etc.

There is a lot more that one can do with visualization other than imagining all aspects of a personal scenario. Definitely read Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins. Great book that Richard recommended me. Hope this helps Marty!

Take care,
TWF

 

[ProblemSolving]

I used to think visualization was New Age bullshit until I actually started looking at my own thought patterns. Think about it: how many times have you seen an attractive woman, then convinced yourself not to approach? Or you knew you should be escalating, but convinced yourself to hold off? This is because you visualize a negative outcome of your actions which causes you to play it safe and not take action.

Now, if visualization can be used to convince yourself NOT to take action, then it can also be used TO take action. Therefore, instead of visualizing an awkward approach and rejection, visualize her smiling exuberantly as a result of your opening. Instead of visualizing the awkwardness of a failed escalation attempt, visualize her being turned on like a dog in heat as a result of your passion.

You'll find the benefits are twofold: first, it gets you taking action, and second, the actions you do take will be done with more boldness because you expect a positive outcome.

 

[Ross]

For me, visualization has always been quite natural. When I was racing people in track and wasn't training or in the race, literally all I would think about is running my next race faster and visualizing the success that came with it. Sometimes I would visualize breaking world records and would really get pumped up. I did the same with seduction; I would imagine a seduction playing out in my head during boring high school lectures.

The result of doing this made the experiences feel a little underwhelming. I would visualize myself winning races, and when I finally won a race I was mad I wasn't breaking world records. I simply walked off the track with a neutral expression thinking about what I could do right now to get the edge in the next race.

This being said, I only use visualization when I can't physically be doing the things. So if I'm stuck in a boring lecture without being allowed talking, I'll be off visualizing an approach, or perhaps a lay with the cute girl in the front row . It's definitely better to experience these things, as reality may not always match up with your dreams.

 

[TheWiseFool]

Hey Ross,

What was your event haha? :J

 

[Ross]

1600m. The visualization for such a long event is difficult, but it's fun to visualize in segments. Especially the end of a race . Now I find myself visualizing lifting heavy ass weights.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Have you read Chases article on Visualization? He did one sometime in 2013. If I weren't pressed for time I'd try and find it for you... but I'm strapped.

Here's to pleasant visions.

-Rob

 

[TheWiseFool]

Ross,

Awesome man! Did you just do track or did you run xc also? Always great to find other runners ^_^

 

[PinotNoir]

With a cursory google search, I couldn't find the actual scholarly articles. But if you're willing to trust the 2 sources below....

Although visualization was regarded as "new age hype" for many years, research has shown that there is a strong scientific basis for how and why visualization works. It is now a well-known fact that we stimulate the same brain regions when we visualize an action and when we actually perform that same action. For example, when you visualize lifting your right hand, it stimulates the same part of the brain that is activated when you actually lift your right hand.

Emphasis is my own.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/srinivasa ... 71340.html

According to Lynne McTaggart in her book The Intention Experiment, electromyography (EMG) has shown that the brain does not differentiate between the thought of an action and a real action.

It appears that just as when really performing an activity certain neural pathways are stimulated and chemicals produced, so when mentally imagining that same activity, the same physiological changes are present. Whether the activity is carried out in reality or is imagined, it appears that the neural pathways are strengthened.

Emphasis is my own.
https://suite101.com/a/what-happens-in- ... on-a168879

See why guys can get addicted to a woman (i.e., Shopping Guy)? If you fantasize about her, sex with her, and marrying her over and over, you're strengthening the same neural network! See why guys can get addicted to porn? See why depression and self-defeatism can be an endless cycle?

Your brain just doesn't give a shit. It's the same stuff! At least according to neuroscience.

And from that same 2nd article, they discuss how to visualize properly:

Pillay states that by giving the posterior parietal cortex too much information at once through visualization, it becomes overloaded. He suggests therefore that whatever one is visualizing may need to be broken down into stages so that the posterior parietal cortex can digest the information.

Getting The Most Out of Visualization
In order to make visualization practice as beneficial as possible, it appears that honouring the neurology behind it is worth bearing in mind. This means getting to the point of being able to visualize oneself as if actually engaged in the desired activity in order to develop the neurological pathways. Breaking visualizations down into stages if necessary will ensure that the part of the brain that assists in planning a route to achievement, will not be overwhelmed with too much data.

Therefore, do it in stages. Do it in the NOW, not past/future. Make it positive using active voice (e.g., "I am winning the race now" instead of "I was not losing"). Here's an example, following each step.


1.) Imagine the love of your life is standing right next to you, right now, looking at you lovingly. How do you feel?

2.) Now imagine what her eyes look like. Your eyes are locked with each other. How do you feel? What do they look like?

3.) Now imagine what her hair looks like. How it falls down upon her shoulders and around her head. How the light hits it. How it smells. How it straightens or curls or twists or bounces.

4.) Now imagine the complexion of her skin. Is she creamy or caramel or something else? Imagine the softness of it. Imagine every bump, every wrinkle, every inch. Your eyes are feasting upon the complexion of her face. How do you feel?

5.) Now imagine her lips. She's giving you that warm smile that she only gives you. The curves of her lips are pointing up. Her eyes are squinting. Her cheeks are wrinkling. She's staring at you. How do you feel?

6.) Now imagine her entire body standing there before, just inches away. She's close enough for you to hear her breathing in the dead silence. This is the love of your life, right next to you.

7.) You can now read her thoughts, her personality, her mind. She is the perfect woman! What is her personality like? What is she thinking? Is she thoughtful, kind, compassionate? Is she outgoing, friendly, adventurous? How does this make you feel?

8.) Now, speak to her. What do you want to say to her? This is the moment. This is your chance. Now.


Now, do this same visualization with a complete stranger that is utterly breathtaking! You can build each step. You're at some coffee joint. You see her. Then visualize yourself as a confident, sexy man. You are a confident, sexy man now, and you are in the coffee joint now. You are a fucking hot man. Fear doesn't control you. Death doesn't even control you. You ask every women out, no matter what.

So in this case, I think it can help with approach anxiety

My two cents,
PN

 

[Marty]

Pinot, your entire post is fascinating. Thank you. I might try that very soon, actually.

Thanks to all for your abundant input!