So if anyone has been watching the news in America, they've probably heard about the Santa Barbara University shootings. It is horrible what happened. I hope the victims and their families can find some sort of peace and that the killer's family is not blamed and can find their own peace as well.
I think the shootings have a lot to do with mental health, a culture of entitlement, a poor family and social atmosphere, autism and yes misogyny. I think that his hatred was directed towards socially popular men and women, but from the limited clips and news that I have read, he places a lot of blame on women. But what I believe sent him truly over the edge is something that I have struggled with in my own life. I have found that it accompanies depression and the main page has talked about it in articles.
Instead of coping with his own problems and realizing that he was the solution to his own problem (and the only one who could help himself), he chose to blame others. Ultimately, we alone choose where we go and the decisions we make. I think if this kid had been able to solve his mental health issues, fix his entitlement issues, and maybe start improving his fundamentals, he could have gotten the attention he wanted. In fact, I'm sure of it. But he chose to blame others and attacked the people he believed were holding him back. This is what makes mental health issues so dangerous. They trap people in their own despair and then lead them to blame others.
The solution is to realize that you are a product of your own decisions. You are the only one who can fix it. So feel sorry for yourself if you need to. But don't blame other people. Once you feel better (or you force yourself to feel better), get up and fix the problem yourself.
I do not believe that this was purely an attack on women. It seems wrong to call it that considering he killed and targeted men as well and it is wrong that the media simply lists the names of the women who were killed. This is a HUMAN issue. All people deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. Women should not be killed for turning away men. And men should not be killed out of jealousy for having sex with women. His actions don't represent what most men think.
To say that most men are taught that they deserve female attention follows the same line of reasoning as the killer. Blaming a group of people for an incident and stereotyping most people of a certain group is not the solution. I do not believe that most men are raised in a misogynist culture. Was the killer misogynist? Hell yeah. Was he also racist? Yep. He had a ton of issues, but misogyny came to the forefront and is being analyzed as the main cause, when the truth is much more complicated.
When a girl rejects you, it sucks. But like this site details, that isn't her fault. She's clearly done nothing wrong (and most men get this). It is simply a reflection of the person you are and her taste. And if you don't like it, then change. But don't blame others. Most people realize this. Out culture doesn't perpetuate the idea to blame women for rejection of sexual advances.
This guy was a terrible person. There are many factors that drove him to do the horrible things he did. What I think we are missing is that blaming others for his own problems and refusing to work on solving them himself was a major issue. He wasn't just entitled when it came to women, he was entitled when it came TO EVERYTHING. Most people get this but with mental health issues it can be difficult to see these things. Our culture needs to work towards creating a culture where all people are equal, where mental health issues are not stigmatized, and where people realize that you are the cause and the solution of your own problems.
Blaming other people never works. Only you can fix your problems.
(I realize this is a sensitive topic and I hope I have not offended anyone. My goal isn't to place blame, but to highlight how destructive an attitude of blaming others for your problems can be. The views expressed are my own and if the moderators have a problem with this post, I am happy to alter it or remove it. I am also happy to discuss or clarify my views over personal message.)
