What’s going on


Space Monkey
space monkey
Oct 22, 2017
This girl I’m dating casually is acting different. And I’m starting to have feelings for her. So I’ll give a background of what’s going on and what my real question is at the end.

We’ve been dating casually for close to a year know. We have fucked each time we go out. We really have a strong connection we both help each other out.

I’m starting to think I really like her more than a casual set up. We first started seeing each other when we worked together then. Then she got another job but we still saw each other roughly every 10 days.

So at my job I got a big bonus and a promotion. She was happy for me and arranged a gathering of my coworkers at a bar this past Wednesday. We are all good friends so it was not a surprise she set up the meeting. No one knows we are dating but always tell us that we look good together.

She also wanted to go out of town and go to San Diego; to celebrate my promotion. The weird thing is I’m not sure if she wasn’t sure about going since we have never gone in a trip. So when we were at the bar we both went to put quarters at the meter. As we were walking back she said she got a text message from her sister that her mom was in a car accident. And I asked in a warm way is she ok and she got upset and said she didn’t want to talk about it.

We got to the bar and she didn’t tell anyone about the accident. An hour later she gave me a hug and left. She then texted me a couple hours later to see if I was ok.

So today she texted saying:

Her - hey

Me - hey how’s your day going

Her - it’s ok and yours

Me - it good as-well. I’ll reserve a room for this Saturday in San Diego( we had already said we will split the bill)

Her - that’s what I want to tell you. I might have to take care of my mom this weekend. I’ll let you know by the end of the day

Me - off course family is always first

Her - are you mad? (3 hours later)

Me - I’m not mad

So she never told me if we’re still on or not and I haven’t asked her since she said she will inform me.

So in the past I would just blow this off and not care if we went or not. But like I mentioned I’m starting to care for her and concerned about her mother. And I can tell she cares about me. She could be lying and her mom is perfectly ok and had second thoughts about going.

So my question is how do I handle asking if she still wants to go. I want to ask her or just let her tell me? and if she doesn’t confirm if we’re going. Ignore her until she texts me. With any other girl I would do the second and ignore her until she texts if she never confirmed with me even if it’s a few days later but it’s different with her and I don’t want to lose my frame and look like I’m chasing. Even though we’ve been seeing each other for almost a year.


Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Nov 20, 2012

Women are bad at handling such situations. It's best to let her settle her things.

If you been following or reading my stuff, women have different different tribes for her needs.

To mix you into her family tribe, there's some things that you didn't check off the box,

Or that she sees one response of yours in the past, that make her assume that whenever she brought up something close to this particular situation, she will get a close off reaction to you.

Because three things:

1)she has a genuine red flag
2)she is bad at communication
3)she wants to keep her tribe.

Women do this with me. They also do this with guys whom they have a respect for.

You see this with American men and Asian women. So, you never really know what's going on, until years later.