What is considered as women's nature VS lying?

[Aaron93]

There are articles on the main site that explain very well that all women omit, twist, and manipulate information. Now, it is also true that some people lie more than others, or are outright liars. Where do you draw the line between a woman simply being a woman and a woman straight up lying? If she tells at first she only had one boyfriend, but 6 months later tells you that she actually had 4 boyfriends before, is that lying? I had one girl who said she was a black belt in karate, and when asked since when she did karate she replied she had joined 3 months ago, so she was definitely lying to impress me. I can give many examples but you get the point. What is outright lying when it comes to women?

 

[tommysawyer123]

Did you ever get an answer here? I've been wondering about this myself.

 

[ulrich]

Why do you care that much?
Seems like OP is emotionally affected by this.

Short answer is… there is no clear line.
People twist truth all the time (women do it more often but it is a human tendency)… when it is right, when it is wrong, how much is enough is all contextual.

You get to decide the line.
And if you want respect, you have to respect the line you draw yourself.

Is lying about how many boyfriends she had acceptable? You draw the line.

 

[tommysawyer123]

Yeah im dealing with a similar issue as him. I've caught my current gf of 6 months lying about tiny things, all which I just shrugged off as it was clear she was just trying to make herself look as good as possible. But she casually mentioned the other day how she doesn't follow any of her previous boyfriends or "like" any of their IG content after we discussed male vs female thirst trap photos. I mentioned how that would be a big no-no for me (if my gf was still liking an exes content, I don't care if they follow them) and she agreed and hoped I wasn't engaging with other women's IG profiles. I thought it was strange for her to offer this information with 0 prompt from me so I looked up her ex on IG and sure enough, she still follows him and appears to like his photos from time to time. She's never done anything to make me not trust her and she's otherwise seemingly obsessed with me, but this seems shady and now I wonder if she's secretly pining over another man (this man ended it with her).

 

[Gsi2810]

As Chase has mentioned in his articles, I think it was the Madonna vs. Whore complex. Girls like to be treated as Madonnas so tailor their bheaviour and interactions as such but in reality they are sexual beings and it's the job of the seducer to make her feel comfortable and turned on enough so she doesn't need to put up with appearances. All lies stem from this.

 

[Beck Bass]

She's never done anything to make me not trust her and she's otherwise seemingly obsessed with me, but this seems shady and now I wonder if she's secretly pining over another man (this man ended it with her).

Pining might be a strong word, but if she still liking his stuff maybe she hopes she gets another shot... (he ended with her, btw, so kinda sets up the dynamic as her chasing him already).
If she has a great relationship with you, this likely won't affect you, but if you guys ever break up, she wants to have another guy on the bench (not saying that he's currently, already).

It's typical female behaviour, but men do that too (do you really not follow any girls you want/wanted to fuck?). As far as what to do with it, it's your relationship, as @ulrich wrote, you have to draw the line yourself. I myself would have a talk with her like, look, you told me X, but actually you're doing Y, so what's up with that? But you have to handle it properly, like what are you going to do if she still likes his stuff and follows him, even though you told her you're not ok with that (after you tell her you're aware that she still does those things)? Are you willing to walk away? Are you gotta stop rewarding her with your attention/loyalty/whatever? Of course you can't go nuclear (like fucking cheat on her) and expect thing to be ok afterwards, but if you just let her walk all over you eventually she'll find another guy that don't allow her to do that (and maybe cheat on you in the process). Like if she just denies it, I would be like, ok, "I'm also not gonna follow girls" (I was thinking of putting like hot girls, but if you say that, you're kinda implying he's hot, which is not only a bit gay, but also cucky, given the situation, not to say works against you) "and like their stuff, ok?", and then do just that lol (with a smile, ofc, because I'm a goofball, but girls know I mean business and know they gotta respect me regardless)

Like don't get paranoid over it, but yeah, demand some respect, because I mean she's your girlfriend, after all.

 

[tommysawyer123]

You guys all make great points. I genuinely don't care if she follows exes (I follow mine, but I don't engage with their content), but I do care if she tells me she doesn't and still sporadically likes their content - especially after she said herself "when a girl likes an exes content it means hey im still here". She doesn't know that I know about this, so I'm deciding if I bring it up or just let it be (and see if she continues to like any content). It's slowly eating away at me now and don't want it to ruin my frame if I do discuss it with her (yes, if we did discuss this issue and she kept doing it I would walk away). I'm just caught off guard as she's seemingly obsessed with me - constantly wants sex from me, does everything/anything she can to please me, always incredibly enthusiastic to see me, always tells me she loves me, wants my kids etc etc...all the stuff you expect from a girl who is wild about you. Especially at 6 months in, I'd assume she would be terrified to put that in jeopardy in any way...

 

[topcat]

You guys all make great points. I genuinely don't care if she follows exes (I follow mine, but I don't engage with their content), but I do care if she tells me she doesn't and still sporadically likes their content - especially after she said herself "when a girl likes an exes content it means hey im still here". She doesn't know that I know about this, so I'm deciding if I bring it up or just let it be (and see if she continues to like any content). It's slowly eating away at me now and don't want it to ruin my frame if I do discuss it with her (yes, if we did discuss this issue and she kept doing it I would walk away). I'm just caught off guard as she's seemingly obsessed with me - constantly wants sex from me, does everything/anything she can to please me, always incredibly enthusiastic to see me, always tells me she loves me, wants my kids etc etc...all the stuff you expect from a girl who is wild about you. Especially at 6 months in, I'd assume she would be terrified to put that in jeopardy in any way...

I wouldn’t make any rash decisions yet, nor bring it up. Just observe casually and continue to get and reward increasing investment from her. Keep a casual eye on the situation and maintain a degree of skepticism about her actions but don’t fall into paranoia or start mistreating her.

It might be a good idea though, to “innocently” flirt a bit outside of your relationship and have her see other women flirt with you (cashiers etc.) For your own confidence and to create a degree of possessiveness over you in her. Maybe even spend a little time away from her but reward her for chasing and actively trying to close the gap.

Though it really may not be that big a deal tbh.

 

[tommysawyer123]

@topcat thanks for the reply. Yeah I'm leaning towards not saying anything but honestly, I screen girls pretty well at the beginning to see if they've been alpha widowed or pining for an ex, etc and kinda missed this one. The best course is probably just to continue doing what I'm doing and getting more investment from her, make her chase me even more, etc). But I've alpha widowed many women and know the mark it leaves on them. I easily maintain the alpha provider vibe in an LTR but know it's pretty hard to compete with a guy of decent value who leaves a woman. Women just don't forget that. Unfortunately I do love her, so it does eat at my ego. I'd never get mad at her about it, etc, I know how to control my emotions at this point in my game skills.

 

[Beck Bass]

I'm just caught off guard as she's seemingly obsessed with me - constantly wants sex from me, does everything/anything she can to please me, always incredibly enthusiastic to see me, always tells me she loves me, wants my kids etc etc...

Yeah, it shouldn't be a big deal if she's investing all that into you, it's just silly habits sometimes.
Like I used to comment and like some stuff from some random girls that I wasn't even trying to bone and my girl would get a bit mad sometimes, but we're rock solid (that said I just got rid of my IG, I was tired of social media and it turned out to avoid a lot of drama with my girl, but I can't imagine most girls ever leaving IG anyways so not exactly a viable solution lol)

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

Did you ever get an answer here? I've been wondering about this myself.

They are going to be who they are.

With respect to LTRs

Before getting into one
1. Have your own place - can't be tied to a chick financially or physically
2. You can replace her with a better/younger chick
3. Maintain and expand your social circle
4. Adequate "tasting of the rainbow"

^This is your lifestyle/passive game. This is sometimes known as dread.

With the chick
1. Screen
2. You will be teaching and molding
3. Clear set of expectations/Rules
4. Quick to chastise
5. Get to the root of the issue (her acting out/acting up is sometimes a sign of something else)

When remediation fails, DROP HER.

In terms of rules and the chick not abiding by them, being slick, letter of the law not the spirit, etc -

The rules are not for the chick, the rules are for you.

If you picked well, reinforced good behavior, punished bad behavior - you have to drop the chick when she causes you doubt.

She's going to keep persisting in whatever behavior you don't like. It's in their nature.

Most men allow her to do whatever.
Most men try to keep their gf's happy.
Some men even anticipate what their gf's want and try to please before she even thinks of it.
Most men will pick and choose battles.

But most men do not have options.

If you're on a pick up board, you DO have options.

Exercise them.

But WIA, "I've been with this girl for 3 years" but haven't married her or had kids with her...

If you're not taking the next natural steps, and she's acting like this - set yourself free.

Now if you're married and you got kids - obviously you want to really try, maybe get some professional help (though often women want us to get couples counseling, but when it turns out they're the ones being unreasonable, they're no longer interested in counseling...)

Men stay in bad relationships for the kids far too often.

Drop her. You're not like most men. Getting a new GF is not that hard.

Don't ever put yourself in a position where you can't grab your keys and go.


WIA

 

[tommysawyer123]

Yeah, it shouldn't be a big deal if she's investing all that into you, it's just silly habits sometimes.
Like I used to comment and like some stuff from some random girls that I wasn't even trying to bone and my girl would get a bit mad sometimes, but we're rock solid (that said I just got rid of my IG, I was tired of social media and it turned out to avoid a lot of drama with my girl, but I can't imagine most girls ever leaving IG anyways so not exactly a viable solution lol)

Yeah she and other exes have "celeb crushes" and whatnot, who cares. My issue this is her ex she had a "situationship" with right before me. I guess being the guy women usually pine for many years later, I'm in my head about how powerful it can be to drop a woman and screw with their head for an extended period of time before they auto-reject themselves (but usually having lingering feelings).

 

[KJ Francis]

You guys all make great points. I genuinely don't care if she follows exes (I follow mine, but I don't engage with their content), but I do care if she tells me she doesn't and still sporadically likes their content - especially after she said herself "when a girl likes an exes content it means hey im still here". She doesn't know that I know about this, so I'm deciding if I bring it up or just let it be (and see if she continues to like any content). It's slowly eating away at me now and don't want it to ruin my frame if I do discuss it with her (yes, if we did discuss this issue and she kept doing it I would walk away). I'm just caught off guard as she's seemingly obsessed with me - constantly wants sex from me, does everything/anything she can to please me, always incredibly enthusiastic to see me, always tells me she loves me, wants my kids etc etc...all the stuff you expect from a girl who is wild about you. Especially at 6 months in, I'd assume she would be terrified to put that in jeopardy in any way...

How old is she? This is six months in and she wants your kids? Maybe she has more general baby fever than love sickness.

Perhaps she is of that age where if you don't more the relationship forward, she will jump ship. Obviously she is presenting herself as an option to her ex by liking his pictures.

I am inexperienced with relationships, but if you're fucking her anything short of fantastic and aren't moving forward on a track, I don't think a woman is really yours, and same after the kids grow up. There's a married woman in my office who beings me home made lunches sometimes. Great mother and stereotypical good girl. Even if she would never fuck (and I probably wouldn't escalate on a coworker), you can see in how she looks at me, this woman does not belong to her husband.

They can be so guilty and still truthfully say "I didn't do anything". Women always want plausible deniability. If she's nearing 30, I wouldn't blame her for it either, like I wouldn't blame her for killing me for the last bottle of water in a famine. She's trying to ensure survival through her genes.

 

[tommysawyer123]

How old is she? This is six months in and she wants your kids? Maybe she has more general baby fever than love sickness.

Perhaps she is of that age where if you don't more the relationship forward, she will jump ship. Obviously she is presenting herself as an option to her ex by liking his pictures.

I am inexperienced with relationships, but if you're fucking her anything short of fantastic and aren't moving forward on a track, I don't think a woman is really yours, and same after the kids grow up. There's a married woman in my office who beings me home made lunches sometimes. Great mother and stereotypical good girl. Even if she would never fuck (and I probably wouldn't escalate on a coworker), you can see in how she looks at me, this woman does not belong to her husband.

They can be so guilty and still truthfully say "I didn't do anything". Women always want plausible deniability. If she's nearing 30, I wouldn't blame her for it either, like I wouldn't blame her for killing me for the last bottle of water in a famine. She's trying to ensure survival through her genes.

She's 33 and I've wondered that myself...but I'm 38 and have had quite a few women be in love with me and the look they give you is undeniable. I've even had friends comment after seeing her with me that she is head over heels about me. I'm trying to stay neural in mind and can say she has never done anything else besides this to make me question her motives. I don't doubt there is baby fever though, any woman after age 27ish has it. Her ex is 50 with two kids and already had a vasectomy. I have slowly moved the relationship forward but this has definitely made me take a pause on if I want to invest anything further.