What is your cold approach banter process?

[Brassfaced_Jim]

If a chick pulls me up firmly with “I’m not gonna fuck u Jim” then I smile say no worries I understand I’m just attracted to u and can’t help myself . carry on the rest of the date or else end it quickly w an excuse then disconnect and move on.

 

[Francis]

More on momentum.

Concluding this one - I ended up interviewing this girl for an assignment. It was a plausibly deniable deep dive that focused 100% of the conversation on her motivations, done on a couch in my apartment lobby. I ended up bouncing her up and down real quick after her uber call. This was months ago. Never followed up after her Europe trip. Telling the class I approached her in public had a very apparent preselection boost on one classmate.

But I also interviewed another girl for the assignment who I ran into today. So she was a professional contact who's always had great sexual tension. We've sat legs close to touching in a cafe and always stand with faces close with her extended glances at my lips. She gave me an extremely tight hug on the sidewalk today with her family there. This was the social momentum start.

Returning to the apartment, I ran into this two year kid who asked me for a key. He'd found a keyhole in the lobby so I led him over to it and had him try a couple. I had great tension with his mom, but they were only in there warming up and there were other people in the lobby. Otherwise I could have gone direct to get a quick number.

But as I got on the elevator, this other girl who'd overheard rushed to get in with me. The mom said goodbye again from afar, and then riding up, I asked the girl if she was visiting (on her way to her brother's). It didn't matter what I'd said because she was like completely beaming. And so I asked if she was single and she said no, Happy Thanksgiving and still had this huge smile on her face.

This is where I need "the snap" to get her to exit the elevator and pull right away, but I will never have that great of a wingman again.

 

[Francis]

Ran into her

FR - Feminist in Aisle Four

Luckily it seems you can rewire anchors with positive reference points. I'm definitely not making a journal before you guys start posting more reports. *** 2026-03-12 - Stopped in at Whole Foods and felt a little tinge spying the spot where I had gotten in the car with the girl last week...

www.skilledseducer.com

@Chase could you please clarify something... Not on this girl, but on early flirting overarching strategy...

@casey_jfly (don't get distracted by this and keep doing what you're doing) said he's working on being less "nice" and more flirty. I recommended chase frames, but then saw your X post to @Arnav (not sure if same):

Chase frames are better saved until you’ve got a decent back-and-forth with her.

10 minutes in, 20 minutes in, etc.

If you bust them out too early, before she trusts your intentions are good, she’ll throw up a wall to them.

Exception: girls who are flirtatious from the jump.

https://xcancel.com/GirlsChase/status/2041761197620654530#m

With SAC, I think Similarity requires showing some interest in her personally. Compliance is more action based interspersed, so the early verbal content if going more indirect is about Arousal?

I had boiled down flirting to "CHASE FRAMES" full stop.

Now say you did a shopping opener on a girl about her tomato sauce decision... And she's not closed off, but is maybe humorless hypothetically, so you don't want to go too hard on the jokes...

Does that mean early flirting boils down to "subtle innuendo" full stop?

***

My mental conception of flirting is informed by this article:

How to Flirt with a Girl

The other day I got told I was a very good flirt. And, I suppose, I am. Of course, I wasn't always a good flirt... well, perhaps I was always at least a little bit of a flirt. What's it matter if you know how to flirt with a girl or not? In fact, it matters a good deal. Flirting is how you...

www.girlschase.com

1. Subtlety and implication
2. Wit and chase frames

Then there is @Skills

Socializing - How to flirt mini guide for in person gaming and digital gaming (texting).....

Guys have been requesting for me to do a mini guide on this, so here we go: So what is flirting: "Flirting or coquetry is a social and sexual behavior involving spoken or written communication, as well as body language, by one person to another, either to suggest interest in a deeper...

www.skilledseducer.com

1. Chase frames
2. Grandmaster
3. Innuendo
4. Sex talk

Therefore, in the first few minutes going indirect, solving for x = subtle, witty innuendo (and maybe some extra calibrated sex talk).

Seems consistent with @Karea Ricardus D. sexual framing in A2.

So perhaps the answer is one on one day game must include direct interest fairly quickly or it falls apart. But again hypothetically if the girl is on the shy side and not responding to teasing, and you are going indirect so it's still too soon to cold read too personally (showing focused interest) and there's nothing to reward with touch yet... Does this leave situational innuendo?

Because in that case the only thing remaining I can think of is start talking sensually about peeling off some garlic layers for some sauce and engaging her emotionally, prior to micro calibrating proximity and touch, then showing some personal interest after she signals some.

***

I hope this isn't too KJ mental masturbation because I do think it's a valid question about the overall strategy guiding everything.

Group A2 I can understand... DHV to the obstacles and tease the target cause you're not even engaging her fully. But one on one I'm still at a loss without going direct and giving her the power to evaluate you mostly on your fundamentals.

Can you put me up on some game or simply throw me a koan?

 

[Francis]

More research:

Subtle, deliberate sexual frames implant sexual thoughts in her head in seemingly deliberate ways, but she can't be sure it's because you want HER, rather than because it is just the way you are.

Subtle, deliberate sexual frames are a low-risk way to introduce sexuality into a courtship without sticking your neck on the line. They frame you as just a generally sexy guy. They can allow you to 'wake up' sexual feelings in women who'd otherwise resist these if you went in too overt.

You'll pretty much never get rejected over subtle, deliberate sexual frames.

In my opinion: subtle, deliberate sexual frames are the best thing to start out with, because you can easily dial them up if the girl is biting, or dial them down if she isn't.

Tactics Tuesdays: Sexual Frame Setting

There are a variety of tools you can use to set sexual frames. But they aren’t all best used at all the same times in a seduction. Here’s which to use and when. On one of my articles, Finegirl asks: Chase could you deepen alek's article on sexual frames where he talks about the chase frame and...

www.girlschase.com

Re: sexual game

it is during the mid-game (after you’ve hooked her in with your smooth interaction) that you really show sexual intent, although you do so lightly during the opening as well. This way you manage to make sure you get perceived as a lover without activating any anti-slut defense (like with the caveman style) while avoiding the risk of being perceived as a provider (like with the old school style) as you make sure you don’t wait too long before showing sexual intent.

3 Ways to Show Her Sexual Intent

When and how should you show sexual intent? Though the question may seem innocent enough, it actually is at the very core of what distinguishes the various schools of thought in seduction. Why is when and how you show sexual intent so fundamental? Because it deals with how you get a girl...

www.girlschase.com

I am all for chase frames, grandmaster, and even quite direct intent... It's really about timing though. I believe it's important to always test compliance and ramp up the heat when appropriate... And I also would like to become a better tease. I do think teasing may well become a standard feature of my seductions.

But theoretically I think at the core of it, what I really want to do is set that sexual frame through an implied sexual prizing DHV, plus general sexual vibe that's separate from projected intent. Again we're talking early game.

I hope this makes sense to anyone reading. If the light is green, you accelerate. This is about default, fallback, high odds process for girls who are not immediately smitten by the sight of you.