What should be my next move?

[Blassreiter]

I spoke to a girl from my class a couple of weeks ago on chat. As of this girl, she is studious, quiet silly and I used to think she is a bit shy only to be proved wrong. Since then, I have been planning to make my move on her (which I did yesterday on chat). So, the scenario on begins like this:
{After the introduction stage}
Me: I was wondering... Why did u choose such a far off college? I mean u could have got admission in a college nearby your hometown?
She: There Are...but they aren't that good....and besides I wanted to checkout hostel life!!
{After a while}
Me: I m surprised your parents agreed, But I am sure they must be worried about you day in n out
She: You bet!!! When I came here first...at least 10 calls they'd make everyday!!!
Me: Even your boyfriend must be worried! He must have made a 100 calls right?
She: I don't have one!
{got a clue!}
{After a while}
Me: Oh! And by the way.. since u don't have a bf... Its k if I ask you out right?
She: Ya ya
Me: So lets go on a date! You coming right?
She: I'm ready even now!
{After a while}
Me: Btw, I wasn't joking about the date
She: But i was!!!
.
.
.
She thought that I was joking. I somehow survived the conversation with average results after that. Now, the point is, as per my observation, she seems to be moderately interested in me and actually helps me carry on our conversation. I intend to meet her personally and speak to her because she bounces off my statements on chat. So, how do I ask her for a date??? I have read the first 100 pages of the book "How to Make Girls Chase - Every Tactic And Technique You Need To Get The Girl(s) Of Your Dream " so I know the basics. I would like to make it clear that I am interested in a relationship, NOT in getting laid (Because I'm only 18). I need to make it quick or I'll end up in the friendzone. Please provide me some guidelines to continue.

 

[Tyme2k]

Get her on a date and escalate. Very simple. If you try to limit yourself to boyfriend territory you will come off as needy. She needs to know you will take care of her in every way and she can rely on you to escalate.

That said you need to talk to girls in person and maaaannnnnnyyyyyy more. Thinking about only one is a sure fire way to fuck it up.

 

[Franco]

Hey Blassreiter,

I agree with Tyme here that you need to get her out as quickly as possible. Remember, whatever she says doesn't actually matter. If she's replying to your texts, then she is investing in you. The fact that you had to mention that you "weren't joking about the date" makes it seem as if you weren't sure if she would say yes and actually mean it, so you were just "testing the waters" so to speak. It comes across as weak. That is why she protected herself by replying with a witty response such as, "But I was!"

One fun way to recover from slight mistakes like this is to out-frame her with some wit back toward her direction. For example, this can be one way you can flip that conversation back towards getting her out:

• 
  Me: Btw, I wasn't joking about the date
  She: But i was!!!
  Me: What a shame... because I was ready right then too! I guess we'll just have to build up some anticipation and make it later this week . What's your schedule like?
  
  * Then she might respond with some suggestions or tease you a bit. Make sure you push for the date here though when she responds. Try to frame it as if you knew she was going on the date all along and that you were just teasing her by not setting it up immediately *

Always move quickly and with confidence!

Cheers,

Franco

 

[Flames]

I think the problem was that you didn't actually ask her on a date, you asked if you could ask her. Then made a suggestion that lets go, which wasn't actually a plan either (unless it came out wrong by how you typed it of course).

If/when you ask her out on a date. It has to be something tangible like let's goto x for some y. Not 'lets go
out on a date'.

It's one definite place you have to be direct, anything else comes across as weak, or edging your bets.

 

[Blassreiter]

I wish to thank all of you for looking into my problem! I understand very clearly what I am supposed to do now.
But... there is only one question which goes unanswered...
What if she feels shy to go out with me and says something like, "I don't want to go out with you!
There is a possibility because she is the SHY type of girl, and I am certain that she WILL be nervous. The possibility of that is quiet low but, I need to have a backup in such an emergency situation. Dropping out the conversation is not an option because if she replies something like that then it would be coz she is simply nervousness or not yet ready for it.
PLEASE tell me your thoughts quickly! That's because I will be asking her out for a date in next 3 hours. Any knowledge provided for tackling such a situation will be appreciated!

 

[Flames]

I wish to thank all of you for looking into my problem! I understand very clearly what I am supposed to do now.
But... there is only one question which goes unanswered...
What if she feels shy to go out with me and says something like, "I don't want to go out with you!
There is a possibility because she is the SHY type of girl, and I am certain that she WILL be nervous. The possibility of that is quiet low but, I need to have a backup in such an emergency situation. Dropping out the conversation is not an option because if she replies something like that then it would be coz she is simply nervousness or not yet ready for it.
PLEASE tell me your thoughts quickly! That's because I will be asking her out for a date in next 3 hours. Any knowledge provided for tackling such a situation will be appreciated!

It's not very likely she's ever say that if she wanted to go out with you shy or not, but if she says no, and your convinced she actually does, then you maybe better off either picking something less 'intrusive', more private or simply just asking someone else.

 

[Blassreiter]

Thanks for your help Flames! I made it! Went rough here and there, but finally she agreed....

Here's our conversation:
7:11pm, Apr 9 - Me: {Her name}!!!
7:12pm, Apr 9 - Her: {My name}!!!
7:12pm, Apr 9 - Me: So, started off with physics?
7:12pm, Apr 9 - Her: Jus opened the book!!
7:13pm, Apr 9 - Her: Wbu??
7:13pm, Apr 9 - Me: Siting with an open buk since hours
7:13pm, Apr 9 - Me: It's another story I dint read anything
7:13pm, Apr 9 - Her: Hehe....m better than you...atleast I slept!!
7:13pm, Apr 9 - Her: Heehee
7:14pm, Apr 9 - Me: Was just thinking about u...
7:14pm, Apr 9 - Her: Wat hapnd??
7:14pm, Apr 9 - Her: Oh puh-lease!!!!
7:14pm, Apr 9 - Me: Hahaha
7:14pm, Apr 9 - Me: Don't believe me o wat?
7:15pm, Apr 9 - Her: Don't kno wat t say!!
7:15pm, Apr 9 - Her: Study study...I.wont help.you in your exams!!!
7:17pm, Apr 9 - Me: Don't worry dear, morale support is equally important!!!
7:17pm, Apr 9 - Her: Huhhh....
7:17pm, Apr 9 - Me: U dint get it
7:17pm, Apr 9 - Her: Wat?
7:18pm, Apr 9 - Me: Umm... I hate situations when I can't find the proper words to express my ideas
7:18pm, Apr 9 - Her: Hmm....acha listen...
7:19pm, Apr 9 - Her: Let me make myself clear to you....I don't have a bf and neither do I need one...
7:20pm, Apr 9 - Her: We' re friends!! That's it!!
{here comes the resistance}
7:21pm, Apr 9 - Me: Look Her, I like you, you are a cool person. But don't go getting ideas. I'm not easy!
{out-framed her as Franco suggested}
7:21pm, Apr 9 - Me: 
7:22pm, Apr 9 - Her: K..then!! At peace!
7:25pm, Apr 9 - Me: What a shame.... I guess we'll just have to build up some anticipation then! 
{Needed something to continue}
7:25pm, Apr 9 - Her: Anticipation??
7:30pm, Apr 9 - Me: I'm glad I met you. When I saw you at the first time in canteen, i thought you must be shy... But then when I started speaking to you... I noticed how wrong I was..
7:31pm, Apr 9 - Her: Ok..
7:32pm, Apr 9 - Her: But I dint get you...build up anticipation??
{Now changed the topic all of a sudden}
7:35pm, Apr 9 - Me: Umm... Lemme think...
7:36pm, Apr 9 - Me: Tomorrow you are free after physics paper right
7:36pm, Apr 9 - Me: ?
7:36pm, Apr 9 - Her: Hmm...but y?
7:38pm, Apr 9 - Me: Patience, just answer my question clearly, you will get your answer too
7:39pm, Apr 9 - Her: Hmm..maybe
7:43pm, Apr 9 - Me: Instead of making this conversation on whatsapp, wasting precious time before physics paper, why don't we chuck this topic for today now talk about it after exams?
7:44pm, Apr 9 - Me: Lets study for now!
7:44pm, Apr 9 - Me: I don't want our performance being affected in any way!
7:45pm, Apr 9 - Her: Ya lets!
7:45pm, Apr 9 - Me: So where do we meet after paper?
7:46pm, Apr 9 - Her: We'll decide that later...
7:46pm, Apr 9 - Me: Ok {Her name}!
7:46pm, Apr 9 - Her: Chalo then!! Let's study!!
7:47pm, Apr 9 - Me: Cheer up n show some energy! We need to study well!
7:47pm, Apr 9 - Her: 
7:48pm, Apr 9 - Me: I'll simply call u up n we'll decide the venue later
7:48pm, Apr 9 - Me: K?
7:50pm, Apr 9 - Her: K..

So now, I'm meeting her tomorrow after exams...
The nearest place to our college where we can hang out is McDownalds..
Nothing much romantic around the place, but for begineers like me, that should be enough though.

Observations:
1.She lowered her resistance when I made her realize that I have my standards.
2.Tried to stay calm and it did help.
3.She says she dosen't want a bf, but I doubt that fact because she agreed to meet me.
4.She has a roomie with whom she discusses stuff about me.

Now,
The only task left is to chase frame her and make her fall for me!
So everyone please suggest me some one liners that can help me. And also some advice on dating... Its my first date though!

 

[Flames]

Hmm on first reading I thought you'd blown it but it could still go either way I reckon, you still need to be a bit stronger in your approach I think.

I didn't like the bit when she said "were friends and that's it!!" I'd take that as an out and out no, but then she kinda backtracked a bit with the next line.

But anyway see how the 'date' goes.

 

[Tyme2k]

First suggestion don't go into this date expecting anything. The only thing you can expect from this is learning.

You will not be able to MAKE her fall for you, either she will or she wont. The most important thing is for you to be completely congruent. Don't say anything to make her feel a certain way, everything you say should be what YOU want to say. The second you adjust what you're doing based on her you will kill everything.

It's not what you actually say though it's how you convey your SELF. I may do a write up on self soon...

Remeber the basics, lead, deep dive, screen/qualify, and kino. Move to isolation/seduction location and escalate.

 

[Blassreiter]

Thanks Tyme2k,
but now I've got a bigger problem here...
Here texts at 2am midnight:
" Hey listen...
See..i dont wana talk on this topic anymore coz its making me uncomfortable
Let's not complicate things more and keep it to a simple friendship..
All the best for tomorrow!"
.
.
.
She wants to flank the date now...
She agreed to the date at about 8pm, and said was being uncomfortable at around 2am, which means she has been investing in me all the time.
Should I reply with something like "We just met, and you’re already sizing me up for a relationship? LOL you didn't get my point! I expected us to meet just like in that exercise we had in communication skills where we have to gather information about an unknown person. The venue thing is just coz there are people in our class who would mistake a simple friendship into something wrong. Since you are uncomfortable with all those formalities just come and just come and meet me in the canteen or in the reading room. A 10min small talk might just make you feel better [her name]."
So,

 

[Tyme2k]

I cant speak from experience here since I don't get friendzoned. I've been told twice since I started game and burnt both sets to the ground. One I plain said no, I have enough friends. The other I said in text, "sure I'm cool with friends with benefits."

Needless both didn't amount to anything.

You can choose to be her friend and have her around for social proof and to get at her friends. Or you can burn it to the ground..

Definitely do not send a long winded text like you wrote, I think joking about her moving too fast is cool, but it may just come off as "you don't get it."

Maybe someone with experience busting through friend zone can help you with this..

 

[Flames]

I'll be quick here because I'm on my way to work.

Theres two things you seem to be doing

1) Expressing your knowledge of 'how things work' verbally, this makes her believe your playing games.
2) Pressuring her into things by 'talking over' what she's saying.

She seems like a fairly straight forward girl and she's told you a few times now, that she feels uncomfortable, so my advice would be to build comfort & rapport, which doesn't mean 'tricking her' or manipulating her, it's about getting to know her as a person and how she 'ticks', then decide if you really like this person enough (screen her).

I'm not sure your situation but I've slept with study buddies and all it took for my was a group night out and a few carefully placed open invitations, and that was before I really knew anything at all.

Maybe your timing is a notch off too, some people get really stressed over exams and don't need the extra pressure of talking about relationships.

Also cut-out that 'I've been thinking of you' or at least changing it I've been thinking us.

Something like I've been thinking about what we can do to celebrate getting over that physics paper is a great way to start, though that maybe too late now.