When a Girl Brings Up a Mistake You Made

[foggy]

Hello my dearest friends,

I met a girl about a year ago. When I first met her, I talked about sex in the wrong way. It was an uncalibrated mistake and she started calling me creepy.

We didn't see each other again until last night and she brought it up. I laughed and said, "Yeah that was a long time ago." I changed the subject quickly. I'm sure there was a better way to handle it though.

What would have been the appropriate way to respond to her bringing up my mistake? And what should you do in general when women bring up your past mistakes?

 

[JimmyB]

Yeah this will happen as you improve. What you said is fine or something more like "Yeah maybe, I don't know" and I'm sure that's the end of it. She's just making sure you're not still like that or insecure about it. I like your response.

 

[Byron]

Depends-Are you planning on seeing her again/making her part of your social circle?

I spent a semester and a half in college. At the beginning of the year, I was trying really hard to improve, and my second, fairly popular social circle called me creepy for the first month I was with them. I was way too direct for small-town america (although with some of the international students, of which I was one, I was getting laid).

Months later, it became joke between us about how direct/creepy I am. Me touching girls inappropriately went from being "creepy as hell" to the point where girls would guard their friends from me, to being "just Byron, it's fine" and they would actually enjoy it. The solution is deep-diving, bonding, and making it byronic (I played the I'm not from here card).

However

If you don't actually give a shit about her, or she's calling you out in front of people:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/skeptical-look

and hold. If she doesn't break, then shrug, look away, and interact with everyone but her. Make her feel stupid for bringing it up.


The way you handled it wasn't bad though. You didn't get flustered, or let it get to you. The laugh was great.

Hope that helped.

xoxo B