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Where and how to find better guy friends and quality wingmen.

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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I have decided to make a big shift in my life and in order for that to happen, I know I have to surround myself with better people. Friends I have had to date have sucked for the most part, either they have been the morally self-righteous judgmental types or total losers that play videogames. I want to know where to find better quality friends that are connected to nightlife or at least have some degree of game and social life.

All suggestions welcomed, recently signed up for a sports league.
 

radeng

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Feb 17, 2015
Messages
76
Peach,

Good deal on trying to get better friends. Instead of us blabbing off a bunch of shit you could do, why don't you tell us all YOUR thoughts on what YOU could do and we will let you know what are the best ways given your situation. Do a little work yourself mate ;)

As far as your suggestion of joining a sports league, I think thats a pretty good start. Also joining co-ed sports leagues can be a great way to make girl friends (just friends) or possibly girlfriends. I think for this to work, you need to put in all the effort to make the friends. Be sure to invite people out after every practice to grab a beer, or join in with the group if they already have plans. The fact is is that most guys suck with girls and can't or won't do pick up. So whether they will be good wing men or not is up in the air. But if they are social enough to join a sports team, chances are they will be great to go out with while you pick up chicks, even if they don't help. Truth is, if you suck at talking to women, you're gonna get judged. It happens. You gotta dust your shoulders off to get what you want. When it comes to making friends in general, you can't be passive. You have to be the one inviting people out. Don't get sad, be happy that i'ts totally in your control. Every now and then you'll run into another person who actively invites people out. Join forces with that guy.

Good luck, can't wait to hear more of your ideas.

radeng
 

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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Alright so sports leagues were one idea, here are some others that have flopped.

1. Church groups as I have made friends but as soon as it came to anything morally questionable like game, it has flopped and turned those friendships sour.

2. Meeting random guys to be friends with at bars, most of them are hostile as fuck.

Other than that I just do not know how else I am going to go about this.
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Nov 20, 2012
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6,551
PF,

Two things. :)

1)Always have 'test waters' and then put them in 'defcon' categories.
2)Lower Your Standards, but have One IMPT fundamental rule

Example: Church Group, Put them as 'Defcon' 1.

'Defcon 1' means that anything about dating is completely off topic. Politics, try to avoid it altogether.

Another example: Guys who are good with Women. Put them as either 'Defcon 4' or 'Defcon 3'

Guys who are an asshole but good with women: 'defcon 4'.
Guys who are an asshole but successful: 'defcon 3'

Here's the 1st IMPT note: Everyone is affected by causality. IF you say to Julien (let's say a good seducer) that women are sluts and maybe you have a good reason to, unless Julien

-know you well
-provided Julien with enough value
-Julien is thinking about social science, and heading there, and girls are just a side dish

You just gonna get kick away. SO avoid topics or lessen the attention of things they don't like.

2nd IMPT note: Lower YOur Standards. Have some basic fundamental rules.
For me, Self Awareness is what i am looking for, in my friends. IF you are not self aware of your bias, or try to be aware of, you definitely go into my 'category' of friends, where you only serve me a certain roles.

I mean that's who we are, you know. Human. Selfish. :)


Defcon is just a label. You can put other names. They serve as gauges.

Zac
 

Space

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Aug 15, 2018
Messages
563
This is how I see it:

Having cool guy friends is important. Whether your common topic is seduction or not isn't the point.

I don't see any added value from a female's perspective when they are approached by a group of guys instead of just me. Hence, I don't see the value in adding guy friends for the reason that they are 'naturally good with women' alone. I mean, how many of those 'naturals' can really teach what they do with women at all? If your main topic with the guys from the sports club is sports, or you don't forgo going out without them from now on, then of course, it's a different issue.

On the other hand though, I see the value in adding guy friends to your circle who are into seduction if you know you are not the only person in your city with this hobby. Guys who can teach other guys forming a group who can help each other's progress.
 

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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LOL I just want friends that can get girls without being into pickup and friends I can introduce to girls.
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

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Tool-Bearing Hominid
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PeachFrustration said:
I have decided to make a big shift in my life and in order for that to happen, I know I have to surround myself with better people. Friends I have had to date have sucked for the most part, either they have been the morally self-righteous judgmental types or total losers that play videogames. I want to know where to find better quality friends that are connected to nightlife or at least have some degree of game and social life.
PeachFrustration said:
LOL I just want friends that can get girls without being into pickup and friends I can introduce to girls.

I liked this analysis on the 4 types of guys when it comes to girls.

OK. To answer your second quote. And my answer will go against your first quote. I've overheard this from a YouTube video, I'm not sure which one, but it sums up my observations as well. You forgot a significant percentage of guys whose history with girls goes like this: From high school or college they are in a relationship with someone for a couple of years, then they break up, then they enter another relationship, and so on. Until they hit 30, then they marry the girl with whom they are in a relationship with at the moment. Sure, they may be awesome people and you may have cool common interests with them outside women, but what realistically do you expect to learn from these guys about women? I've certainly learned the least from these friends.

I've re-read your second quote. OK, I get that you don't want to learn from these guys about women, you just want some cool friends who are naturally good with women, aka. naturals. What percentage of the male population do you guys think these naturals make up? Naturals, as you've seen them in the movies. I've had a friend who is I'd consider maybe half a natural and half relationship guy, but that's it. One interesting piece of information about him is once he paid for expensive prostitutes, so now I truly don't know.

If you want to make guy friends from the 2nd category in the article (the douche-looking guy on the photo), I have the least experience with them. Maybe it's European culture or my extended social circle or just my personality is so different that I can't recall anyone. That guy on the photo is like an American caricature to me, so. OK, now I've recalled one person from the distant past from the periphery. He was an OK guy, but he wasn't my main friend.
 
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