Why do I need so much approval from girls ?

[Metalus]

Right now im just in a bad mood. Yesterday i have been at a school party (im a teacher not a student) and the girls
didnt go completely crazy about me. Thats it basically.
Its not like im not having success with woman. Right now im seeing a hot one for casual sex.
I have turned down several woman on dates recently and some of my students actually told me im good looking and pretty hot.
2 years ago i had 1 girlfriend, 2 dates and i was kinda chubby.
Now i have several dates (could be more but i dont go out enough) several sex partners - my body is in really good shape and woman tell me im attractive.

But why the hell am I in a bad mood because NOT EVERY woman wants me like crazy ?! I dont get this shit. I know its
a numbers game and you cant have everyone and im doing perfectly fine right now.
Do I really need the approval of some random stranger so much just because its a female human ?!
I know its bs. I know I have to get rid of those irrational thoughts.
Feels even more silly when I write it down....

Every advice is welcome.

 

[Drck]

But why the hell am I in a bad mood because NOT EVERY woman wants me like crazy ?!

>>>> I see two issues. One is big ego: I work out hard, I am smart, I know seduction stuff, I play number game, I have good social circle, I get plenty of dates and so on - so why don't I get every woman I like? Why aren't they crazy about me?

... Don't make me wrong, you should believe that, you should believe that you are the hot guy that every woman wants. But at the same time we have to check the reality - Do these women see you in the same way? I would say not...

So the question is, why not? Because you are not projecting enough confidence, enough sexuality, enough charm... They most likely perceive you as too beta, too nice, too compliant (that's not an insult, just saying for educational purposes)...

The other issue is dependence on what they think about you, what they say about you, how much they like you... If you are dependent you are always trying to prove yourself in some way to others, and if you don't get the approval you get disappointed, you get down, frustrated, depressed....

We should realize that women won't make us happy. They will never make us happy. The only person that can make you happy is you. I know it sounds like a new age BS but it is true, we simply can't base our happiness on approval of others, on how they like us, how they see us and so forth... We have to get beyond this point.

A good way is to find some hobby, whatever you like or whatever makes you happy, then wrap your life around it. At least pretend that you love it, before you really do. You want this hobby to make you happy, make it your life, make it your passion. If you are smart you'll combine it with making money, being around lots of people, or both - this should be your primary enjoyment. Then simply stop seeking approval from females. Females are silly, cute and sexy, females are here to enrich your life - but they are not here to make you happy... Your mom made you happy, she provided for you, she gave you unconditional love, you felt safe and satisfied... But you should not seek the same from females that you want as GFs...

You simply want to develop more alpha-ish characteristics: more independence, more dis-attachment, more doing things that YOU like regardless what others think or approve... And at the same time project enough sexuality and charm...