Why does my girlfriend know everything about celebrities?

EasyE

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Background:

My GF is 20, comes from a very wealthy family and is looking to be a wife, mother wants to support me becoming financially well off so I can take care of her and so that she doesn't have to work. In a nutshell, very feminine and generally introverted. She also moved around overseas alot growing up, and is very much more worldy than girls who grew up from their hometown where I come from.

One thing I've noticed is that anytime I've brough up a celebrity, she almost always knows about them- especially the drama side of things, such as who got caught cheating etc. If someone like Elon Musk got brought up, it wouldn't because of something intelligent he said or achieved, it'd be some drama surrounding him.

Is this some sign of hypergamous nature that women have, where she knows she could get a celebrity because of her background.. or is this just something all women do? Sometimes she'll know about random bits about topics unrelated to drama.
 

gameboy

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Just ask her? We don't know your girlfriend.

From what you're relating, I don't think it's something I'd worry about. But you can always ask her and find out.
 

Spyce D

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It could be her thing .

Like ... There was a time I used to know a lot about football / soccer players , then about pro wrestlers , then about UFC fighters , also about puas ( interests changed with time ) ...

Anyways , point is I don't thing it's something to be worried about ... But you can just use what @gameboy said .
 

topcat

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Is this some sign of hypergamous nature that women have, where she knows she could get a celebrity because of her background..
Blood of Jesus 🤦‍♂️

Women love celebrity gossip. End of. Why? only god knows.

But please, get a hold of this insecurity fast as it will take you no place good.

I hardly have words to address the mental contortion that led you to such a conclusion, except to say the the red pill is bad for you and please avoid consuming it if you love your girlfriend…
 

Bill

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Is this some sign of hypergamous nature that women have, where she knows she could get a celebrity because of her background.. or is this just something all women do? Sometimes she'll know about random bits about topics unrelated to drama.
I think women evolved to be more interested and pay more attention to social information for genetic success as it helps in mate and resource competition and in the modern day this manifests in propensity to gossip / read celebrity gossip. Similar to how modern male interests in things like sports may be simulating evolved interest in tribal warfare and hunting for genetic success as it built status and resource gathering.
 

Skills

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Blood of Jesus 🤦‍♂️

Women love celebrity gossip. End of. Why? only god knows.

But please, get a hold of this insecurity fast as it will take you no place good.

I hardly have words to address the mental contortion that led you to such a conclusion, except to say the the red pill is bad for you and please avoid consuming it if you love your girlfriend…
My son you sound like me now.... We should have an autism forum section and pin this one...
 

Will_V

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Background:

My GF is 20, comes from a very wealthy family and is looking to be a wife, mother wants to support me becoming financially well off so I can take care of her and so that she doesn't have to work. In a nutshell, very feminine and generally introverted. She also moved around overseas alot growing up, and is very much more worldy than girls who grew up from their hometown where I come from.

One thing I've noticed is that anytime I've brough up a celebrity, she almost always knows about them- especially the drama side of things, such as who got caught cheating etc. If someone like Elon Musk got brought up, it wouldn't because of something intelligent he said or achieved, it'd be some drama surrounding him.

Is this some sign of hypergamous nature that women have, where she knows she could get a celebrity because of her background.. or is this just something all women do? Sometimes she'll know about random bits about topics unrelated to drama.

Frankly for someone I was considering marrying it would be a bit of a red flag. I don't particularly trust the nature of people who spend all their time focusing on the lives of celebrities, it's a sign of self-repression and living at odds with something about who you really are.

You have a girl who is quite young (20), very 'worldly' by your own account, and very wealthy. And she already wants to be a wife and stay-at-home mother to a guy she is financially supporting? I would be a bit doubtful if I were you, and doing a bit of cross examination against all the other bits of information I had.

Maybe you are overreacting here, but in these situations often you will have a gut sense of something even if you are not able to put it to words coherently. Because you are the one getting all the signals, and we are only getting your communication. So if that's the case I would be looking around at things very calmly, carefully, and critically to see if she's really the girl I can see sticking with me through thick and thin.

Life is always a risk, but a calculated risk nonetheless.
 

EasyE

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Blood of Jesus 🤦‍♂️

Women love celebrity gossip. End of. Why? only god knows.

But please, get a hold of this insecurity fast as it will take you no place good.

I hardly have words to address the mental contortion that led you to such a conclusion, except to say the the red pill is bad for you and please avoid consuming it if you love your girlfriend…

Not an insecurity, just an observation.
 

EasyE

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Frankly for someone I was considering marrying it would be a bit of a red flag. I don't particularly trust the nature of people who spend all their time focusing on the lives of celebrities, it's a sign of self-repression and living at odds with something about who you really are.

You have a girl who is quite young (20), very 'worldly' by your own account, and very wealthy. And she already wants to be a wife and stay-at-home mother to a guy she is financially supporting? I would be a bit doubtful if I were you, and doing a bit of cross examination against all the other bits of information I had.

Maybe you are overreacting here, but in these situations often you will have a gut sense of something even if you are not able to put it to words coherently. Because you are the one getting all the signals, and we are only getting your communication. So if that's the case I would be looking around at things very calmly, carefully, and critically to see if she's really the girl I can see sticking with me through thick and thin.

Life is always a risk, but a calculated risk nonetheless.

I don't think it's a case of self-represson I think she's just curious about alot of things. Not many girls around her age that you could find youself discussing topics like the russian revolution or aspects of phisiology in the human body, now that I think about it.

Perhaps it wasn't really necessary worth mentioning the fact she is helping me out at this time. I'm currently an athlete with potential, I only mentioned she comes from an affluent background to illuminate the fact that she grew up with a background different from most average hometown girls.

I wouldn't say that she spends all of her time concerning herself with the lives of celebrities, but she spends as much time on instagram/tiktok as much as the average 20 year old girl.

I'll certainly take on board the gut feeling side of things and continue to discern red flags etc.
 

EasyE

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I think women evolved to be more interested and pay more attention to social information for genetic success as it helps in mate and resource competition and in the modern day this manifests in propensity to gossip / read celebrity gossip. Similar to how modern male interests in things like sports may be simulating evolved interest in tribal warfare and hunting for genetic success as it built status and resource gathering.

This was the answer I was after. Thankyou
 

TheEcho

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The Way of the Superior Man says women go toward drama like this similar to how men drift to sports as a replacement for them winning at life. It's to fill emotions they feel are going unmet by the guy. Or she just likes gossip.
 

Will_V

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I don't think it's a case of self-represson I think she's just curious about alot of things. Not many girls around her age that you could find youself discussing topics like the russian revolution or aspects of phisiology in the human body, now that I think about it.

In my experience the most repressed people tend to be fairly high in intelligence, perhaps because they can afford to be where others cannot. And the powerful combination of intelligence, youth, and curiosity is at odds with the idea of marrying young and being a housewife.

But maybe you are right, and she's simply curious, and knows herself well.

But I am curious, if you are willing to share, do her parents support your relationship?
 

EasyE

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In my experience the most repressed people tend to be fairly high in intelligence, perhaps because they can afford to be where others cannot. And the powerful combination of intelligence, youth, and curiosity is at odds with the idea of marrying young and being a housewife.

But maybe you are right, and she's simply curious, and knows herself well.

But I am curious, if you are willing to share, do her parents support your relationship?

What does self-repression look like? To be honest I'm not quite familiar with it and couldn't find a concrete definition when I looked it up. But since you mentioned it, her mother and sister are quite extroverted, while she is more shy and introverted. Sometimes she has no problem saying what she thinks on her mind, sometimes she will like to be alone and journal, let time pass if theres been an argument. But she ranks low on neuroticism, obviously not completely because after all she is a female.

As for her parents I've met them a couple times since they came to visit our city. We've been out for dinner together with the whole family at a restaurant and they were kind and respectable. They seem to support it but I've only known her for 6 months, so it's too early for them to get involved a great deal, and we don't see them as often as a normal family living in the same city.

To add more context: I'm also 27 and a professional fighter. So while not being super financially rich, I consciously put myself in a position where I would take a hit financially to be able to train more to focus on my goals. Hence why she likes the idea of supporting me now in order to be a wife later.

However, you've made me think about my relationship with her a little more and there's certainly some red flags that I need help with, which I'll make a separate post for.
 

Will_V

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What does self-repression look like? To be honest I'm not quite familiar with it and couldn't find a concrete definition when I looked it up. But since you mentioned it, her mother and sister are quite extroverted, while she is more shy and introverted. Sometimes she has no problem saying what she thinks on her mind, sometimes she will like to be alone and journal, let time pass if theres been an argument. But she ranks low on neuroticism, obviously not completely because after all she is a female.

When it comes to psychology there's no such thing as clear positives and negatives, as far as I'm concerned. Like the trees in a forest we all are shaped differently according to the circumstances of our development, and like all the animals we grow and develop into different niches. To apply too much judgement or predictive effects to individual facets of someone's psyche is a bit of a fool's errand.

What I have learned about people is that you can typically trust someone who fully occupies their niche, whether that niche is usually judged as good or bad. But what you cannot trust is someone who is out of their niche and psychologically impeded from returning to it. Not because they are morally worse people, but because they are unstable, because they are constantly compelled to make the correction to re-obtain their niche against resistance, and such corrections can have unforeseen consequences.

When I say 'niche', I mean that each person has a particular kind of position in life - especially in terms of their relationships with others, as well as the way they express themselves as an individual - that gives them an internal sense of stability and reinforcement of their identity. When they are unable to obtain that position for whatever reason - often some anxiety or fear - they can become self-repressed as a means of trying to force themselves to fit permanently into a different position or niche. But while they may consciously try to idealize their current position, their nature is never satisfied, and becomes drawn toward or even infatuated with symbols of the niche they are really supposed to occupy.

In my opinion, if you want a stable relationship, the best thing is to find a girl who is in her niche. Who has developed unimpeded according to both her fundamental character that she was born with, and the most unchanging aspects of her developmental environment. This tends to be a girl who is very stable, trusting and trustworthy, and with a good perspective on risk and reward.

I don't know virtually anything about your girlfriend except what you've mentioned here, but I was struck by the idea of a rich, pretty 20 year old girl wanting to become a housewife to a guy she was financially supporting. But as it turns out you are not an ordinary dude. It seems likely that you, as an up and coming fighter, represent something very fulfilling to her that she isn't able to find in her life anywhere else - and even perhaps a rebellion from her normal existence. Perhaps she has missed out on some things her sisters did not, and in you she has found a new identity. She is young, and no doubt still finding her niche. Maybe she will find it in you.

We are all as individuals shaped and reshaped forcefully by life, and finding someone who has avoided all of the traumas and wrong turns is not a very worthwhile goal in my book - even if it were possible. But there is always a risk in the tension within someone who has strayed too far from their path, and rebellions will often find a new target. But there's also a lot of meaning in it too. Somehow in this mix we must find someone who means a lot to us, and who we can also trust.

As for her parents I've met them a couple times since they came to visit our city. We've been out for dinner together with the whole family at a restaurant and they were kind and respectable. They seem to support it but I've only known her for 6 months, so it's too early for them to get involved a great deal, and we don't see them as often as a normal family living in the same city.

I don't have firsthand relationship experience with very wealthy girls, but I know some guys who have. And it's my understanding that their parents tend to be pretty difficult to deal with and deeply involve themselves in their daughters' lives. That can also very much play into the way a girl conducts herself in a relationship, both in opposition and in cooperation with them, and can cause a conflict of authority in her mind.

To add more context: I'm also 27 and a professional fighter. So while not being super financially rich, I consciously put myself in a position where I would take a hit financially to be able to train more to focus on my goals. Hence why she likes the idea of supporting me now in order to be a wife later.

However, you've made me think about my relationship with her a little more and there's certainly some red flags that I need help with, which I'll make a separate post for.

I'll reiterate it's not my objective to make you paranoid. When I evaluate a girl for a long term relationship, I simply try to get a sense of how many pieces of her life are in the wrong place, and how her relationship with me rearranges those pieces. Sometimes there are too many pieces out of place, and it's very hard to see how they will be arranged in future, and those relationships tend to be very unstable and unpredictable. But almost everyone has a few pieces out of place, it's just a question of proportion.
 

EasyE

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When it comes to psychology there's no such thing as clear positives and negatives, as far as I'm concerned. Like the trees in a forest we all are shaped differently according to the circumstances of our development, and like all the animals we grow and develop into different niches. To apply too much judgement or predictive effects to individual facets of someone's psyche is a bit of a fool's errand.

What I have learned about people is that you can typically trust someone who fully occupies their niche, whether that niche is usually judged as good or bad. But what you cannot trust is someone who is out of their niche and psychologically impeded from returning to it. Not because they are morally worse people, but because they are unstable, because they are constantly compelled to make the correction to re-obtain their niche against resistance, and such corrections can have unforeseen consequences.

When I say 'niche', I mean that each person has a particular kind of position in life - especially in terms of their relationships with others, as well as the way they express themselves as an individual - that gives them an internal sense of stability and reinforcement of their identity. When they are unable to obtain that position for whatever reason - often some anxiety or fear - they can become self-repressed as a means of trying to force themselves to fit permanently into a different position or niche. But while they may consciously try to idealize their current position, their nature is never satisfied, and becomes drawn toward or even infatuated with symbols of the niche they are really supposed to occupy.

In my opinion, if you want a stable relationship, the best thing is to find a girl who is in her niche. Who has developed unimpeded according to both her fundamental character that she was born with, and the most unchanging aspects of her developmental environment. This tends to be a girl who is very stable, trusting and trustworthy, and with a good perspective on risk and reward.

I don't know virtually anything about your girlfriend except what you've mentioned here, but I was struck by the idea of a rich, pretty 20 year old girl wanting to become a housewife to a guy she was financially supporting. But as it turns out you are not an ordinary dude. It seems likely that you, as an up and coming fighter, represent something very fulfilling to her that she isn't able to find in her life anywhere else - and even perhaps a rebellion from her normal existence. Perhaps she has missed out on some things her sisters did not, and in you she has found a new identity. She is young, and no doubt still finding her niche. Maybe she will find it in you.

We are all as individuals shaped and reshaped forcefully by life, and finding someone who has avoided all of the traumas and wrong turns is not a very worthwhile goal in my book - even if it were possible. But there is always a risk in the tension within someone who has strayed too far from their path, and rebellions will often find a new target. But there's also a lot of meaning in it too. Somehow in this mix we must find someone who means a lot to us, and who we can also trust.



I don't have firsthand relationship experience with very wealthy girls, but I know some guys who have. And it's my understanding that their parents tend to be pretty difficult to deal with and deeply involve themselves in their daughters' lives. That can also very much play into the way a girl conducts herself in a relationship, both in opposition and in cooperation with them, and can cause a conflict of authority in her mind.



I'll reiterate it's not my objective to make you paranoid. When I evaluate a girl for a long term relationship, I simply try to get a sense of how many pieces of her life are in the wrong place, and how her relationship with me rearranges those pieces. Sometimes there are too many pieces out of place, and it's very hard to see how they will be arranged in future, and those relationships tend to be very unstable and unpredictable. But almost everyone has a few pieces out of place, it's just a question of proportion.

Took me a while to get my head around all of this.

Would you be able to give me a brief example to match your description? I certainly get it though.

It'd be worth mentioning that her mother grew up poor and worked hard, and then when she found her husband she no longer had to work anymore and she basically took care of the kids and went on plenty of trips around the world with the family.

My GF growing up, and seeing that is also aiming to emulate the same thing. She wants to be taken care of essentially by a provider and live a highend lifestyle. Probably makes sense as her ex boyfriend was 35, when she was still 19. Not quite sure if thats a red flag.

I've made it clear to her plenty of times that in the meantime I won't be doing well financially while I focus on training, and she seems fine with that as long as it doesn't last for more than a few years. But being looked after by a man is certainly where her niche lies, at least one of them.

As for the curiosity about the celebrities, I think it's certainly just her curiosity. The other night she told me she'd looked up a bunch of corporations/promotions relating to my career and had such an in depth explanation to them all as to their pros and cons, I was quite impressed.
 

Will_V

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Took me a while to get my head around all of this.

Would you be able to give me a brief example to match your description? I certainly get it though.

The obvious example is a 'nice guy' who has learned for one reason or another to become someone he doesn't really want to be in order to have successful relationships.

I've observed both men and women who have failed to live out a sufficiently adventurous life, either from fear/trauma or from being overprotected, who repress themselves by building a logic around the reason why they live the life that they do - often a logic of victimhood. There are also people who have failed to live a life of (what they themselves consider to be) substance and meaning, for the same reasons, who nonetheless live a fairly adventurous (or even very adventurous) life, who build a repressive logic in which nothing is substantial or meaningful.

There are other types of repression. What they all have in common is that the person is under an internal tension to correct the balance of their life, but because there is so much opposition to that correction (for whatever reason caused the imbalance to begin with) any eventual correction can be violent and chaotic, and make them unreliable in terms of staying in the position that someone else might have found them in and built a relationship with them in. Also, because the efforts of their conscious faculties have failed to obtain the correction (and often eventually become the main tools of repression) the task of correction is left to the unconscious emotions, which by their very nature are illogical, unreliable, and chaotic.

This is why people can, as they say, fall off the other side of the horse, do sudden unusual or destructive things, etc, because for some reason or other, due to psychological fatigue and/or a trigger, the repressed emotions emerge from the subconscious in a way that is uncoordinated with their conscious reality.

It'd be worth mentioning that her mother grew up poor and worked hard, and then when she found her husband she no longer had to work anymore and she basically took care of the kids and went on plenty of trips around the world with the family.

That's very interesting and unusual. Looks like she has a strong role model to become a housewife and mother and to submit to a man in a much more dominant position in the relationship. That certainly makes it seem much more likely that she's really wanting what she says she wants.

Is her father a dominant personality?

My GF growing up, and seeing that is also aiming to emulate the same thing. She wants to be taken care of essentially by a provider and live a highend lifestyle. Probably makes sense as her ex boyfriend was 35, when she was still 19. Not quite sure if thats a red flag.

I've never been in a relationship with that sort of age gap, but it seems to me that women who are attracted to much older guys can sometimes end up needing certain things from men around their own age, such as the experience of sharing a similar perspective with someone, and that this can make them a lot more 'practical' in their relationships. But that's just an observation of mine.

I've made it clear to her plenty of times that in the meantime I won't be doing well financially while I focus on training, and she seems fine with that as long as it doesn't last for more than a few years. But being looked after by a man is certainly where her niche lies, at least one of them.

As for the curiosity about the celebrities, I think it's certainly just her curiosity. The other night she told me she'd looked up a bunch of corporations/promotions relating to my career and had such an in depth explanation to them all as to their pros and cons, I was quite impressed.

Yeah, now that I've got a clearer picture it seems more like she is following her natural path according to her role models and the worldview she grew up with. I think a fair amount of the success of the relationship is likely to depend on how well you carry forward the role that her father took in her life, as he seems to be the point of orbit for herself and her mother.
 

West_Indian_Archie

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Is this some sign of hypergamous nature that women have, where she knows she could get a celebrity because of her background.. or is this just something all women do? Sometimes she'll know about random bits about topics unrelated to drama.

Hypergamy.
Depending on the girl's position, but it's usually vicarious hypergamy.
It's like guys that watch sports, and to lesser extents, the stock market and politics.

That said, a chick can position herself like Lauren Sanchez* and cash in.

Keep in mind, Sanchez was married to someone else (as was Jeff)

jeff-bezos-lauren-sanchez-jeff-bezos-girlfriend.jpg


Once you understand that she, and the vast majority of women who have access to other women - a lot of their discourse is about who's dating who. A LOT.

Not saying every chick is watching "Real Housewives" - but many of the pretty ones, pay attention to the social scenarios. With you, with their friends, with family, at the job, and everywhere else.

What to do about "normal" behavior of every woman?

Adapt.

On a differ note.
*I would happily bang out Lauren Sanchez or any other high profile Latina MILF (Salma Hayek, Sofia Vergara, etc)
But If you're worth ~200 Billion dollars - do you wife up anyone? Much less clearly plastic Lauren Sanchez.

Game saves lives.
Game saves fortunes.
 
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