I met this hot woman a while ago. Beautiful and smart, mature woman. I felt strong attraction from her side as well. So I am thinking, why not to try all the PUA stuff I know, it is like a road map, you know where you going, can't get lost. The only problem was that she was taken, and had children.
So I did some of the PUA stuff, it was working great, I got emotionally quite close to her, however I was no able to get closer physically for the above mentioned reason. She put up a high wall against me, and even though I still think that it was doable, I wasn't able to get over it for lack of experience.
So I kind of gave up, but at the same time I didn't. I knew I should never write long texts to her. So I did, and she got quite emotional. I knew I should never put her on pedestal, but I did, in the texts I sent. I knew I should never provide her with greater value than I have, that I should never do more stuff for her that she did for me. I did regardless, I did stuff for her without getting anything back. I knew I should not allow myself to fall in love with her without first fucking her, but I did. I just let go, spent dreamless nights just by thinking about her - while somebody else was fucking her.
I knew I should never do too much, e.g. chasing her. But I did. I literally pushed myself to be around as much as I could, I was even wondering when will she finally freak out. I think she kind of did, but always remained nice towards me. I knew I should go after another females as well. I did only with minimal effort, I rejected many potentially good experiences and relationships, including those who were single, younger and without children. Literally, I did everything that I could have done wrong, while being aware of it.
I also went for rejection with her. Not once, several times. She simply rejected me, I pulled back, and then always came back. I came back even though I was expecting anohther rejection. It was painful, but great experience to get ahead. Today I don't view rejection as something miserable, it is simply part of interaction with females, it became something impersonal.
You just never learn, do you? I am asking myself. But I did. I really did learn a lot.
So why do it, why to put her on pedestal, chase her, fall in platonic love with her while she is fucking with someone else? The reason is quite simple - you will never, ever do it again, and next time you will know exactly what NOT to do. It will be burnt into your brain forever.
Sometimes, to get ahead of yourself, you just have to add personal experience to the knowledge that you have...
So I did some of the PUA stuff, it was working great, I got emotionally quite close to her, however I was no able to get closer physically for the above mentioned reason. She put up a high wall against me, and even though I still think that it was doable, I wasn't able to get over it for lack of experience.
So I kind of gave up, but at the same time I didn't. I knew I should never write long texts to her. So I did, and she got quite emotional. I knew I should never put her on pedestal, but I did, in the texts I sent. I knew I should never provide her with greater value than I have, that I should never do more stuff for her that she did for me. I did regardless, I did stuff for her without getting anything back. I knew I should not allow myself to fall in love with her without first fucking her, but I did. I just let go, spent dreamless nights just by thinking about her - while somebody else was fucking her.
I knew I should never do too much, e.g. chasing her. But I did. I literally pushed myself to be around as much as I could, I was even wondering when will she finally freak out. I think she kind of did, but always remained nice towards me. I knew I should go after another females as well. I did only with minimal effort, I rejected many potentially good experiences and relationships, including those who were single, younger and without children. Literally, I did everything that I could have done wrong, while being aware of it.
I also went for rejection with her. Not once, several times. She simply rejected me, I pulled back, and then always came back. I came back even though I was expecting anohther rejection. It was painful, but great experience to get ahead. Today I don't view rejection as something miserable, it is simply part of interaction with females, it became something impersonal.
You just never learn, do you? I am asking myself. But I did. I really did learn a lot.
So why do it, why to put her on pedestal, chase her, fall in platonic love with her while she is fucking with someone else? The reason is quite simple - you will never, ever do it again, and next time you will know exactly what NOT to do. It will be burnt into your brain forever.
Sometimes, to get ahead of yourself, you just have to add personal experience to the knowledge that you have...
