3 hot women and 1 average how to approach them?

abond0082

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 31, 2019
Messages
65
Yesterday was a HORRIBLE nightclub experince one of my worst ever if NOT THE WORST.

4 black women (I love black) and I had dated a gorgeous black women who ghosted the living day ights out of me.

I approach the first hottie and she is friendly but says she has a boyfriend, the other that I also liked seem disinterted and when I asked to dance she said you can dance with us but she refused to dance with me.

THe third one was hot, I kind of know her but I didnt get the vibe that she gives a rats ass and I felt like an idiot approaching the third woman in that group, and I was kind of scared she push me on her forth friend (Who is really CUTE but unforuntely not as attractive and not my type, nothing wrong with her) and I cheickened out from the last one. I though I was well dressed, had good posture and good perfume but I was etremely awwards and lonely etc...

They ended up grinding on 2 tall Finnish guys really heavy and I felt like absolute SHIT TURD....Sorry for my attitude but I cant blame them, I cant blame being ghosted, it is too painful....It is my fault, I as 35 years old dont have my sht together, lots of bad luck in life and dont have my career at all together which made me extremely INSECURE...I dont have zero skills, I do weightlfiting, my body is quite nice but too skinny, can dance a bit, have a master degree in biology and environmental engineering...etc...

I dont know what to do, It has been so hard to change my mindset and this harsh brutal rejections just confirm every single negative mindset that I have about myself, black women often complain about racism and yet they reject the guys who like them and go for men they complain about constantly.

I have HORRIBLE ATTITUDE, extremely long dry spell and my life is absolute mess,,,,,a car accident from 2012 made me halt things like spriniting, boxing, and other cool stuff...I am scared on losing in life, I want to change this horrible, shit attitude that I have and I want to succeed with women....Jon SInn has wrote a post that if you havent for over 3 years had any suceess with women maybe game isnt for you...and that was my experince the STRANGE THING, is that I have a lot of experince grinding on women a lot of them were attractive and hot....THe only 2 women I kissed in my life where drop dead gorgeous (One FInnish one West African) but there is over a decade distance between them.

Help a bor out, I am tired of being rejected by women that I really like, I want to get intimate but I am even MORE SCARED of Success that failure both terrifies me....I also come from a culutre where there isnt much positive sterotype so it is even more uphill battle.

I have similar taste in women as black men big boobs and big butts slightly thick but not the good sterotype to back it up.

HELP! SOS!
 
Last edited:

abond0082

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 31, 2019
Messages
65

She did not push me I was afraid she would, I did not approach the third girl or forth...

Am not going after super models, not anything, just women that turns me on (NOTHING to do with impressing others, just someone that turns me one), I go for sexy more than I go for beautiful.

Infact one of the 3 wasnt that attractive except her bit big breasts and she was the one I kind of wanted the most.

I did kiss a woman who was not really my type on new year but she wasnt my type and I could keep doing it as I might have been leading her on...DOnt know if I was in the right or in the wrong?

I want to be with women that turns me on (I am not intersted in super models, or the blonde tens, just sexy women well they are maybe even the most in demand now.

Well keep the article in consideration though thank you, I guess you are right, might be dancing and flirting with her next time.
 

Velasco

Modern Human
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
951
She did not push me I was afraid she would

Ah ok got you. So if she had pushed you (or if any girl pushes you to talk to a girl in their group) to the 4th friend (the cute one), then the reason is because she knows that she is DTF. and they think you are hot/cool enough for her. So I don't understand why you'd be afraid of that scenario?

Right now, you're in an "extremely long dry spell". The article doesn't have anything to do with "super models" or "blonde tens" (they are not my type either). Those are just the type of girls that turn on the author of that post the most. For YOU that's black girls and girls with big asses). The article is saying, at this stage, don't disqualify girls just because they don't have a big ass, or are a 7 to you instead of a 9. What you need right now is the reference experience that you have the ability to fuck girls. So when you see a girl that is DTF (and she's not hideous). Ya go for it. Fuck the shit out of her. Then do it the next week. and the next week. This will build your confidence. Because now you have proof that you can fuck girls so now that will be your attitude. Look for girls that are DTF. Then outta the blue, you will come across a girl that's not only DTF but she is also your type. And now that you have the reference expererience, that you have the ability to fuck DTF girls, you will have the confidence that you can fuck this girl that is your type. THEN you will have the confidence that you have the ability to fuck girls that are your type. And you will approach those girls with more confidence (vs "oh she will not like me" :( ) and that is what those girls love. Confident + masculine men. This may also motivate you to really get your life together, so you can retain these girls for longer term :)

baby step, my friend. Start with fucking girls that want to fuck you.
 

abond0082

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 31, 2019
Messages
65
You have some incredible insights

Here is the things, I did date an absolute banging Black 10, didnt bang her, but lots of makeout session (DTF) so it feels a bit like a downhill slope.

But during the club the biggest insecurity that I ALWAYS have around women is career, success in life etc, am not doing well in life at 35, achieved nothing, shit apartment etc...... THat makes me insanely insecure and I dont know what to do about that?

I have spent my 20s doing Engineering and Masters in Biology just like my parents said, get a good certificate, figured put later in life it is useless and thus everytime I approach a girl it comes to mind that I am a loser that cant take care of her and it really shows. Other things like social awkwardness or shyness can make me also feel like an outsider unconfident creep even with good posture, with good dress or with good perfume etc...

WOrst it is so hard to fix

Thank you brother for your time to answer, I am still crying about that night, I feel I would have successded if I have my S*** together.

I reread your post, perfect post man, I hope I listen to what you say.
 

Michal

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 5, 2013
Messages
271
I see in you a lot of my thought paterns, although mine are a bit different. I am a loser from the "no life" point of view.

So, the way I see it, you had a really bad night and then saw the girls go for some other guys. It's tough, noone says it's easy. But take a look at the positive parts. You found the balls to actually approach them. I never do that in clubs, I do not do that and vast majority of guys are afraid to do that. Especially if it is a group of girls.

Another thing I see (and I do it too), you put too much pressure on yourself. I never understood the following which one of the guys posted here, until I tried it. Just go out and enjoy the night, do not have any specific goal in mind, only small goals like "approach 5 girls". Whatever comes after the approach is extra. You have won when you opened her basically. The part I did not understand was to talk to anyone. Cute girls, even if you're not interested. Maybe she will tell you you're funny and that will boost your self-confidence about your humor by 5%.

I would say there are more things you could do but try these first and see how it goes.
 

YS.

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Mar 3, 2020
Messages
170
Hey champ, I know it's a mindfuck but you need to change your perspective on what happens and mindfuck/brainwash yourself a bit.

Rejection doesn't exist. (In your interactions, it literally didn't lol. I have this frame to mindfuck myself but your interactions are textbook lack of chemistry type situations.)

What's a win and what's a loss are completely dependent on what YOU do, not what THEY do. You can't control other people, it's stupid to give them that much power over your emotions, well-being and self-esteem. Also there is a weird paradox in life that the moment you want/need something the less you'll have it. I used to be an incredible salesman and got like 1 new client a month with all out ads (I wanted it too much.), now I'm at extreme abundance in business and I literally try to push clients away but get multiple a month with zero effort and with extremely minimal marketing. You're literally creating the situations that frustrate you. I know it doesn't make sense but you kinda have to assume these frames.
 
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