Cunnilingus = unprotected sex?

[Marty]

Hi friends, I enjoy participating in cunnilingus, usually as foreplay, but I am always a bit worried about performing it on women other than an exclusive, long-term partner, because of the risks of unprotected sex—especially if I don’t know the woman well enough or suspect that she may be promiscuous.

Health department websites will recommend creating a so-called “dental dam” by cutting and unrolling the cylindrical part of a condom into a square shape. I must admit I have not tried this—does anyone have experience with it?—but I find the idea unappealing; the marvelous smell and taste will be masked by that of latex.

I guess there is simply no way around it; penetrative sex can be made almost completely safe by wearing a condom, but there is no real equivalent for cunnilingus. Please feel free to share your ideas. Are there other forms of foreplay that elicit a similar intensity of reaction from the woman? Kissing legs seems to work for some. Nipples? Fingering would be logical, but I find that only those who know me very well—long-term partners—will permit this, probably because of the level of implied intimacy, and anyway some women simply don’t like it.

All helpful ideas welcome.

 

[Conquistador]

It used to be that nobody expected oral sex from a hookup at all lol
Different women respond to different things. My advice would be to set an atmosphere, make her feel comfortable, and turn her mind on. Foreplay usually doesn’t need to be too genitally focused. Just make her feel desired, stroke or massage her whole body, and create a sense of play.
You’re not just trying to mechanically turn her on, after all.

 

[Chase]

Marty!

Good to see you, old man.

Hope things are well with you of late.

You're saying you get girls rejecting your fingering? Are they aroused enough? When you're escalating on a girl and your hand goes toward her crotch, she may push it away a few times, or pull your hand off when you're fingering her, but all you do is keep escalating on her, wait a minute, then let your hand drift back there again. Once she's gotten used to the idea of your hand on her clit, she's going to want that contact.

Re: oral on ONS... everybody's different. Some guys love eating girls out on hookups. Some guys really enjoy licking pussy. There's a graph of what kind of sex acts people most want to see in pornography and men ended up being more interested in watching videos of cunnilingus than women are. Other guys don't want to do it at all. If you're good with your hands and good with your cock you do not need it at all; it's optional.

Personally, I'd focus on why women who want you aren't letting you finger them. That definitely should not be happening

Cheers,
Chase

 

[MarioTheDom]

Personally, I'd focus on why women who want you aren't letting you finger them. That definitely should not be happening

I agree, it's important to understand this because clear coms are fundamental to get amazing sex.

If it happens often, I learned that it's because you might have bad nails (biting them) or bad hands hygiene (black/dirt under your nails)

That turn off women right away

 

[Teevster]

Health department websites will recommend creating a so-called “dental dam” by cutting and unrolling the cylindrical part of a condom into a square shape. I must admit I have not tried this—does anyone have experience with it?—but I find the idea unappealing; the marvelous smell and taste will be masked by that of latex.

The Dental Dam is meant to protect against what exactly? Herpes? oh actually the protection it offers against that is limited. HPV? Ditto. Condoms and Dental dams offer limited protection. If you are scared of HPV just take the jab.

Chances for transmitting or receiving Chlam and Gono through oral sex is minimal... like seriously.... we are talking... 1% or something if the other person is positive (odds are much higher if you suck dick and get semen in your mouth). And really who cares about Chlam and Gono anyway? Just get tested regularly (and do it properly, including a throat test!).


I am one of the few rare cases who has caught oral gono. And really, it was no big deal. One shot of antibiotics and symptoms went away after 1 day. The symptoms were just a slightly weaker than a regular strep throat.

Here is a fact: kissing is more dangerous than licking pussy (HSV, HPV, rhinoviruses, adenoviruses, coronaviruses, group A streptococcus, etc, etc)

Yes. So following your logic you should stop kissing too.

Just lick pussy when you want without fear. People are so irrational these days.
Only precaution I would take is... if you see herpes sores and if you see condolymes and you are not jabbed, then it is better to abort the whole operation actually, including penetrative sex.

-Teevster

 

[MarioTheDom]

So I come from the BDSM scene and there is a lot of degeneracy as you can imagine.

Like i never seen anyone using a dental dam and catching anything, and yes, saliva has a lot of fun packages like:

Kissing with tongues is more likely to spread gonorrhoea than oral sex

Researchers from Monash University and Melbourne Sexual Health Centre in Australia surveyed around 3,000 gay men and found they were more likely to have gonorrhoea in their throat than elsewhere.

www.dailymail.co.uk

On another note I know more guys that catched labial herpes (if we want even call it an STD) by making out with strangers at rave parties.

I guess the issue with the irrationality of STD's these days it's like when an accident happens

there are low chances of happening when you take appropriate measures, but when it does it goes front page.

Having sex involves risk, that's life.
If you don't want risk, you won't have much of a life

 

[Teevster]

They found gay men were more likely to have gonorrhoea in their throat than their penis – and the risk of spreading it was greater for kissing than for oral sex.

And add to the fact that fellatio, i.e. sucking dick is way more risky in terms of catching STI's, especially bacterial (gono etc) than cunnilingus (pussy licking), then that means that kissing is way more likely to spread gono than licking pussy!

Well, I know kissing as a way to spread gono and chlam is debated. I personally don't really think about it other than requesting that the STI clinic test my throat when they do the usual STI check (they do so by default to gay people, and only upon request if you are not). I recommend everyone to do so on their next check up. That's how they figured I had oral gono. It is just a simple throat test - doesn't hurt and takes 3 seconds.


Did I get it from pussy licking or kissing? no idea.

Anyway, just get your throats tested. I recommend a STI test every 3-4 months for anyone sexually active.
- Chlam/gono - test urine + throat (gives valid results after 10 days of exposure)
- Syphilis - blood (gives valid results after approx 1 month)
- HIV 1 & 2 AG/AB (4th gen) (can give valid results after 2-3 weeks, but is almost 100 % valid after 4-6 weeks)
- HIV 1 & 2 RNA NAAT (valid results after 1 week approx) - you are unlikely to be offered this test unless they consider you at risk or if you pay for it.
- Hepatitis B - Blood - (valid after a month - RNA tests will give faster results) - check if you are vaccinated. If you are, you can skip this one.
- Hepatitis C - Blood (valid after a month, but may take longer - RNA tests will give faster results) - this test may not be offered due to the unlikelihood of spreading through NORMAL sexual practices.
- Mychoplasma - Urine (valid after 10 days) - they will only offer you this test if you have symptoms (e.g. it hurts when you piss).

-Teevster

 

[Skjöldr]

Anyway, just get your throats tested. I recommend a STI test every 3-4 months for anyone sexually active

Damn, I do the chlam+gono test every 5-6 weeks when I'm sexually active or if I just have a raw hookup and not being that active in general, I will get tested around 2 weeks after.

My question is, because you seem to know alot about it: Doesn't the STD blood test basically check every single STD? Every time I call the hospital to book an appointment they ask if I want the chalm+gono test (where they swab the tip of the penis or you do a urine test) or if I want the blood test. I always wondered if the blood test was a "all-in-one" test.

Also, from reading what you say, it seems that raw, vaginal intercourse is pretty risk-free? Is that correct?

 

[Conquistador]

Also, from reading what you say, it seems that raw, vaginal intercourse is pretty risk-free? Is that correct?

Not really loll. And certainly not for the girl.
Teevster probably knows the specifics for each STI.

 

[Teevster]

Damn, I do the chlam+gono test every 5-6 weeks when I'm sexually active or if I just have a raw hookup and not being that active in general, I will get tested around 2 weeks after.

Sure why not!

However, keep in mind that a valid hepatitis, syhpilis and HIV test won't be valid (won't appear in your blood in case you are positive) before 3 weeks, and to be close to 100% sure, you have to wait around 5 weeks (I go for the 4th week).

Basically doing for example an HIV test 2 weeks after potential exposure is a waste of resources UNLESS you request an RNA test. But the standard 4th gen test won't be valid.

That said, you can test for chlam and gono after like 10 days, and earlier in case of symptoms.

Basically after a raw hook up, you may get tested for chlam and gono after 2 weeks, but will have to go back 2 weeks later if you want to test for HIV, HEP, and Syphilis - that is, if the tests are done primarily with the focus on your last hook up (you could see if you had any "past" infections).

I think you are testing yourself too often. The protocol for sexually active risk groups is once every 3 months. This includes trannies, prostitutes, gay performing chemsex.... basically people more at risk than you (I assume). So that every 3 months protocol should suffice.

If you are worried about HIV, I suggest you talk to a doctor about PrEP. If you are worried about hepatitis B, then talk to your doctor about taking the vaccine if you haven't already (it is called Twinrix).

And regarding syphilis and hepatitis C, they are both curable (yes, hepatitis C is now curable, with a treatment - 96% success rate).

My question is, because you seem to know alot about it: Doesn't the STD blood test basically check every single STD? Every time I call the hospital to book an appointment they ask if I want the chalm+gono test (where they swab the tip of the penis or you do a urine test) or if I want the blood test. I always wondered if the blood test was a "all-in-one" test.

So the "swap into the dick" is a bit outdated. That said, it still works. It is just that, that urine tests if done right (no pissing 1 hour before, and first urine that comes out ... I guess the public hospitals in your country are fed up with idiots not following the instructions properly), are as legit as swab-tests - just less invasive. But they I don't mind nurses doing it.

BUT NO.... blood and urine tests are NOT the same and they DO NOT test for the same things.

Blood is for the big bad - but uncommon STI (HIV, syphilis, hepatitis).
Urine/swab is the the innocent - but common STI (gono, chlam)

Do request that they SWAB your throat next time. They did it to me in DK when I requested it at Bispebjerg Hospital.

Also, from reading what you say, it seems that raw, vaginal intercourse is pretty risk-free? Is that correct?

Chlam and gono is EASILY spread through vaginal intercourse. Although that is no big deal if you are on doxy-pep or/and if you get test regularly.

However, if you are not jabbed, hepatitis B can easily spread through vaginal fluids (although there is little hepatitis B in your country - it mostly comes from foreign sex workers). I still recommend taking the jab. In France that jab is mandatory (I wish I knew, otherwise I wouldn't have paid 2000 DKK for it in DK)

Syphilis is easily spread through vaginal sex - although few straight people has it. Syphilis is cured with antibiotics and is not an issue if it is caught early (i.e. 1-2 months). It is also uncommon for straight people and it always give weird symptoms.

HIV can be spread through vaginal fluids. The odds depends on whether she has a high viral load or not.

-Teevster

 

[Skjöldr]

@Teevster Thank you, lots of good stuff here. I wanted to edit my post to "relatively/comparatively risk-free" vs "risk-free", because nothing is risk-free, but I couldn't go on the forum because I've been so ill since last night.

So what is your MO for banging a girl first time? Do you recommend using a condom or do you just let loose and make sure you take other precautions like getting tested in optimal intervals and taking medications like prep and vaccines?

 

[Warped Mindless]

Guys are way to worried about STDs.

Been cold approaching since 2006. I don’t know my exact lay count but it’s pretty high and I always wear a condom with a girl the first time. Always!

I have also licked a lot of pussy and have never got anything from that.

I’ve gotten a couple other things that were curable with antibiotics but those are really no big deal.

Take precautions, use some common sense, don’t live life in fear.

Worry more about the other stuff you will get.

Had one woman being bed bugs over with her. She was a high class lawyer that just happened to get bed bugs from a hotel she was at the night before and they were in her bag she brought with her. From there I got them.

Then got them another time too but not quite sure where exactly they came from but It was probably from a woman I seen at a hotel while she was in town.

Had one woman tell me she was single only to find out that her husband was a psycho. He stalked for for a short while and I had to deal with that.

Had another accidentally knock my MacBook off the table and break it like three days after I got it.

I could go on but I won’t… point is, stop worrying so much about STDs lol.

 

[Teevster]

Had one woman being bed bugs over with her. She was a high class lawyer that just happened to get bed bugs from a hotel she was at the night before and they were in her bag she brought with her. From there I got them.

Happened to me too. Dealing with bed bugs is worse than dealing with any usual STI.

-Teevster

 

[Teevster]

@Teevster Thank you, lots of good stuff here. I wanted to edit my post to "relatively/comparatively risk-free" vs "risk-free", because nothing is risk-free, but I couldn't go on the forum because I've been so ill since last night.

So what is your MO for banging a girl first time? Do you recommend using a condom or do you just let loose and make sure you take other precautions like getting tested in optimal intervals and taking medications like prep and vaccines?

Unless the girl insist I will use condoms. I used to use condoms in most encounters. But now, I never use condoms unless she asks for it. Why should I? The combo of testing every 3 months, taking PreP and doxy-PEP (pill post sex to reduce the chance of catching chlam, gono and syphilis by 85%), as well as being vaccinated for hepatitis and HPV is more than enough.

And actually, this is NOT considered unprotected sex by medical standards.

Only thing this does not protect against is pregancies. If she is in her late 20's or 30's I will use a condom because they are baby crazy. With the others I pull out.

I also start having more anal sex. And oftentimes I would fuck pussy with a condom, and ass without. Yeah it depends.

-Teevster

 

[MarioTheDom]

and ass without

You are a savage

 

[Teevster]

You are a savage

Haha why? I am well protected.

-Teevster

 

[MarioTheDom]

Because unless she does a deep anal cleansing (like porn actresses do) there is still ton of bacteria that could cause you an infection

 

[Teevster]

Because unless she does a deep anal cleansing (like porn actresses do) there is still ton of bacteria that could cause you an infection

Doxycycline takes care of it. Hence why you take Doxy-Pep.

-Teevster

 

[Skills]

Because unless she does a deep anal cleansing (like porn actresses do) there is still ton of bacteria that could cause you an infection

Yeah i went through a fucking in the ass stage while having rotations, and gave a lot of the girls in the rotation bacterial infections.... this happened over and over and over..... I never had sex in the ass with a girl that did the anal cleansing like porn starts.... I just stop all together doing anal sex...

 

[Skills]

Doxycycline takes care of it. Hence why you take Doxy-Pep.

-Teevster

what is this a pill post anal?? can you elaborate...