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Does age matter in dating ? Examples of "older" puas flourishing in the dating world

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Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
6,259
You just said it takes work :ROFLMAO: This is getting ridiculous. Best of luck to you my friend, I have no argument with you.
did you read the post???:

 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
2,301
The biggest problem you have as an older guy is figuring out how to give a young girl an experience that fulfills her at her level. Whenever I see guys talk about how if you want to get younger girls you have to look exceptional or put in some huge amount of 'work' on yourself, as if they are these femme fatales with sky high expectations, I know this guy is scrabbling in the dark.

As you get older in life the problem is that you get jaded, serious, unplayful, logical, you get an end-of-history illusion about your own life and its possibilities. It's difficult to find things that surprise you, pique your curiosity, arouse your imagination and fill you with a fullness of yourself. You've got a career, you've got a routine, responsibilities, etc, and that's probably how it will be until you get shovelled into a retirement home and die. And when you wear this on your face and in the hunch of your back, this makes you boring and uninteresting for a young girl who is still figuring out who she is.

As Carl Jung said the most important task as you age is to maintain you inner child, to not let it get crushed by the repetitive mundaneness of a life that has stopped growing and changing.

Even worse is when someone has aged ungracefully (not physically but spiritually). That is when they feel unfulfilled and confused by who they have calcified into, and stuck in it, and are emotionally triggered by the spontaneity and naivete of those much younger than themselves, attributing all sorts of untoward motivations and strange perspectives on them to explain the reactions they provoke.

Nothing creates more of a sense of repulsion in a younger person than seeing an older one who cannot feel comfortable around them - you are expected to be more than them, to know more and to have experienced more of what that person is excited to become, to feel at ease with who you are around them - for what does this young person yet know about anything?

If you are with a girl who is much younger than you, you simply have to express that part of you which is at her level. A more reckless, playful, spontaneous, open-minded, dont-give-a-fuck side of you. So that you share an experience of the world in which you can connect emotionally and physically. Otherwise you will always be on the other side of a wall made up of days and months and years, and she will not be able to connect with you or arouse herself with you.

If you don't have a side to yourself of that kind, then that is your problem.

Think of yourself when you were younger - what sorts of older people did you really enjoy and look forward to spending time with? No doubt it was the ones who were the most light-hearted, unserious, ready to have fun and get up to no good, unselfconscious individuals. The rest you just looked at as wallpaper, boring with nothing to offer. Well, why are you not that person, if you admired them so much? Who did you become instead?

The key to connecting with someone is always along the path of truthfully understanding how they experience the world, free of the interference of your illusions and insecurities. Don't get run into the ditch by some negative inner voice with crude explanations of why younger girls don't like you.
 

Ratata

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 14, 2024
Messages
89
So, at least two peeps in this thread are in disbelief. And they think they can argue with accomplished and experienced gentlemen about what is true or not lol... One of which seems to think 35 is "old"... It's not. It's prime time for anything between 18 to 40 (or older if you're into that), whichever you fancy. Listen, it's up to you. I offer you the blue pill. You go back to your world view and old beliefs and we don't need to discuss this any further. Old geezers can never get hot young women, and moreover only the mature guys who keep in excellent shape gets girls at all. And then only if they're rich. Or... You can take the red pill and have your world shattered, and choose whoever you like, because once you know how, they will like you back no matter how old your are, or how poor you are, or how ugly, because you've learned something more important: How to get under her skin. And moreover something even more important than that; how to be comfortable in your own skin, however that looks like. That's how I made out with a girl 20 years younger than me this weekend. And mind you, she came to me.
 
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