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Does age matter in dating ? Examples of "older" puas flourishing in the dating world

Skills

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
6,259
You just said it takes work :ROFLMAO: This is getting ridiculous. Best of luck to you my friend, I have no argument with you.
did you read the post???:

 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
2,301
The biggest problem you have as an older guy is figuring out how to give a young girl an experience that fulfills her at her level. Whenever I see guys talk about how if you want to get younger girls you have to look exceptional or put in some huge amount of 'work' on yourself, as if they are these femme fatales with sky high expectations, I know this guy is scrabbling in the dark.

As you get older in life the problem is that you get jaded, serious, unplayful, logical, you get an end-of-history illusion about your own life and its possibilities. It's difficult to find things that surprise you, pique your curiosity, arouse your imagination and fill you with a fullness of yourself. You've got a career, you've got a routine, responsibilities, etc, and that's probably how it will be until you get shovelled into a retirement home and die. And when you wear this on your face and in the hunch of your back, this makes you boring and uninteresting for a young girl who is still figuring out who she is.

As Carl Jung said the most important task as you age is to maintain you inner child, to not let it get crushed by the repetitive mundaneness of a life that has stopped growing and changing.

Even worse is when someone has aged ungracefully (not physically but spiritually). That is when they feel unfulfilled and confused by who they have calcified into, and stuck in it, and are emotionally triggered by the spontaneity and naivete of those much younger than themselves, attributing all sorts of untoward motivations and strange perspectives on them to explain the reactions they provoke.

Nothing creates more of a sense of repulsion in a younger person than seeing an older one who cannot feel comfortable around them - you are expected to be more than them, to know more and to have experienced more of what that person is excited to become, to feel at ease with who you are around them - for what does this young person yet know about anything?

If you are with a girl who is much younger than you, you simply have to express that part of you which is at her level. A more reckless, playful, spontaneous, open-minded, dont-give-a-fuck side of you. So that you share an experience of the world in which you can connect emotionally and physically. Otherwise you will always be on the other side of a wall made up of days and months and years, and she will not be able to connect with you or arouse herself with you.

If you don't have a side to yourself of that kind, then that is your problem.

Think of yourself when you were younger - what sorts of older people did you really enjoy and look forward to spending time with? No doubt it was the ones who were the most light-hearted, unserious, ready to have fun and get up to no good, unselfconscious individuals. The rest you just looked at as wallpaper, boring with nothing to offer. Well, why are you not that person, if you admired them so much? Who did you become instead?

The key to connecting with someone is always along the path of truthfully understanding how they experience the world, free of the interference of your illusions and insecurities. Don't get run into the ditch by some negative inner voice with crude explanations of why younger girls don't like you.
 

Ratata

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 14, 2024
Messages
89
So, at least two peeps in this thread are in disbelief. And they think they can argue with accomplished and experienced gentlemen about what is true or not lol... One of which seems to think 35 is "old"... It's not. It's prime time for anything between 18 to 40 (or older if you're into that), whichever you fancy. Listen, it's up to you. I offer you the blue pill. You go back to your world view and old beliefs and we don't need to discuss this any further. Old geezers can never get hot young women, and moreover only the mature guys who keep in excellent shape gets girls at all. And then only if they're rich. Or... You can take the red pill and have your world shattered, and choose whoever you like, because once you know how, they will like you back no matter how old your are, or how poor you are, or how ugly, because you've learned something more important: How to get under her skin. And moreover something even more important than that; how to be comfortable in your own skin, however that looks like. That's how I made out with a girl 20 years younger than me this weekend. And mind you, she came to me.
 

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Oct 9, 2012
Messages
6,608
Let's take a brief digression from talking about mPUAs picking up younger girls, and talk about some beginner and intermediate players doing that.

Of my mentorship students, several of them are in New York City right now. One of them has told me repeatedly that most of the New York pickup guys agree NYC is "one of the hardest cities in the world" to pick up in (I found NYC a lot of fun for pickup, but I haven't been there in over a decade, so maybe it's gotten harder; dunno).

Nevertheless, one NYC student who is 38 and has been day gaming for three years just bedded three new girls in a 10-day period. One of his new lays was 23, a 15-year age gap (that said, the girl didn't ask his age until after sex, when she suddenly thought to ask... and was pretty startled at their age gap... lol).

Another NYC student who is 44 and had made a grand total of 20 cold approaches in his life before we started coaching went out and on his second outing ended up in-set with a beautiful early 20s chick... the two of them talked for almost an hour in the park and traded numbers (she was interested but it flamed out over text... we are working on his follow up game).

These are just a few examples (each guy has more), but the point is: neither of these men are pickup supermen:

  • One has a few years of experience under his belt but, according to him, this is the first year in which his approach anxiety isn't so bad that he can approach without heavy nerves, and in which he is getting further into his pickups (he's at 7 lays on the year).

  • The other was a complete beginner with very little romantic or sexual experience when we started working together.

The first time I talked to each of them each told me they had limiting beliefs around younger women being interested in them and said they usually avoid approaching younger women because they don't want to seem like creeps. Now they're both approaching younger women and are consistently surprised how warm the receptions they get are.

Neither guy is a "Chad", neither has big muscles, neither dresses in any kind of elite way, neither has advanced-level game.

You know what they are doing differently now compared to before they started working with me?

They are actually APPROACHING these girls, focused on testing out the material I have them working on instead of worrying about whether she is too young and might not like them, and these early 20s girls are hooking and getting into them and sometimes hooking up with them.

Chase
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

average_daygamer

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Apr 5, 2025
Messages
396
there are 50 thousands practical post about getting around the age stuff... One of them stickied in the forum....

she told you that she thought you were 25, you said "nah i am 35" I will tell you that the guys in that situation don't tell her at that point the real age, they just agree with the age she guessed..... Then after the 50th fuck when she is invested they go "ups i was actually 35"

I understand the concept but once you do that you have to rearrange things to talk about because one lie leads to another.

I would rather just be closer in age to the girl in the first place. But of course, that is not possible.

It is an interesting to to do (tell the girl your actual age) to see if it affects her opinion or not and in that one example, I think it did as I never heard from her again.

Normally during an interaction I avoid the issue of age if the girl is younger, hoping that if I don't ask her age, she won't ask mine.

It's definitely an additional barrier, though. I wish I was aware of game in the 2010s, when I was in my 20s, as I needed it more than ever back then. And with the learning curve, I could have been enjoying real results by now instead of getting my tentative first milestones on the wrong side of 30.
 
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