I remember reading a story from Chase where the girl said she forgot her credit card and he was like "ooops, me too".
I had thought that was mildly brutal but she had it coming with her intention and lie.
And yet it pales to what happened to me yesterday.
It's the same girl who flaked in my last report.
And by postponing to later time yesterday and then being late on the re-scheduled time wasn't buying her any goodwill.
Given the story, let's call her "freeloader".
Freeloader shows up dyed hair and perm, heavy make up, heels, long black coat and branded red bag, smelling of perfume 2km away.
I love stylish girls but too showy becomes tacky. This was slightly on tacky, but still "barely acceptable" territory.
I can smell a girl like that kilomters away: I knew chances were high she might have expected of being paid for.
AT THE RESTAURANT
Why would you go with her to a restaurant you might wonder. Well... I hadn't eaten yet and was starving.
So we pick one and we sit.
Her English is so poor I can't even understand her ethnic background.
She looks Asian, but also, somehow, very Russian to me. Indeed she speaks Russian. Then I seem to understand her mom is Mongolian.
She says she likes people from my country as they are gentleman. And I very much don't like that framing (later she would also say men from my country have many women, which is much better, even though those low level stereotypes don't help her build any value).
Anyway, we order pizza and salad to share.
A beer each, she barely drinks hers, she probably left more than 2/3 of it as "she just drinks veeeery little (why would you order it then, I think)
The food is also not enough for her, so she also orders another dish of pasta which I then also eat a bit.
PULL EFFORT
As the eating draws to an end I write on a translator we should go watch a movie, and she says she can't today but "next time".
Had we agreed to go back together I might have picked up the bill.
But the "next time" amped my resolve of not paying.
TIME TO PAY
She writes something like "sorry for me being late and thank you for this", implying she's been invited.
I say it's ok and write on the translator "let's go pay".
THE LITTLE SCENE
At the register, I tell the clerk to divide in a half and pay half of it by card. Then move slightly to the left to let her pay.
Oooops she's didn't see that coming.
She says she has no card. Many times.
I tell her I don't have enough money sometimes, some other times reply "but you got cash" or just say "come on" and pointing towards the register as to say "your turn".
This goes for a while and now two more couples stand behind us waiting to pay.
Nobody speaks: everyone is watching the scene.
I'm still not willing to pay though, and after a while tell the people behind me to move ahead with their own payment as I step to the side.
Some talking in the local language between the clerk and Freeloader, and both of them are telling me to hand the card.
I keep inviting freeloader to pay instead, wondering what the fuck are they trying to do: I've already made it clear I won't pay the whole thing.
The people behind are still completely silent, watching the scene as social pressure piles up on me.
After having blocked the line for a while I understand: the clerk needs the card to cancel my transaction, otherwise they can't process new payments.
I finally hand my card.
The clerk is unbelievably cold to me to say the least.
He's probably thinking I'm an asshole not inviting the girl? And that I'm a double asshole for letting her grill in that situation. And triple asshole for forming a line and still not just paying the thing?
Maybe.
The transaction is cancelled, the other couples pay, without anyone saying a single word.
Now it's back to us again.
And it seems like she really doesn't have cash or card.
She's nervously using her phone. Sometimes looking at me panicked as she utters "oh my God".
She repeats "oh my God" a few times, I'm actually feeling bad for her.
I'm checking online how much the whole amount would be in Euro: 52 Euros or so. Nothing crazy but nope, not willing to pay that.
I didn't wanna "punish" her or anything, far from it, I just didn't wanna pay for her.
Freeloader and the clerk keep talking to each other. Freeloader keeps nervously using the phone and calls someone.
The clerk leaves the station and goes downstairs.
I now ask to pay my half and pay cash. Not a thank you, not a nod of the head.
I'm thinking I'm done with my part anyway and I might just leave if this keeps going on for too long.
I've noticed it's really easy here to pay electronically, yet I don't know how, after a while freeloader finally manages to pay with her phone and/or by handing a few digits.
Maybe she called someone to get her card details? Not sure.
I open the door to leave, without turning towards her.
This interaction is gone, it makes no sense pretending we might still see each other or "it was nice with you".
Once we're outside, I slow down and she hurries past me. She even turns her head, very quickly and without specifically looking at me, and says "bye".
I know higher level of bitchiness would have never said bye. She wasn't thaaat bad after all.
Then she quite literally slinks away in the crowd with a super hurried pace, as if she wanted to go as far as possible, as soon as possible.
That must have been such a terribly embarrassing time for her.
Truth is, it was the same for me.
I thought coming out with no money at all was impolite of her, as was impolite to order another dish knowing she had no money.
Yet I felt very upset during the whole time, and even afterwards, I still kept feeling bad for her.
YOUR THOUGHTS
What are your thoughts?
Did I exaggerate?
I had thought that was mildly brutal but she had it coming with her intention and lie.
And yet it pales to what happened to me yesterday.
It's the same girl who flaked in my last report.
And by postponing to later time yesterday and then being late on the re-scheduled time wasn't buying her any goodwill.
Given the story, let's call her "freeloader".
Freeloader shows up dyed hair and perm, heavy make up, heels, long black coat and branded red bag, smelling of perfume 2km away.
I love stylish girls but too showy becomes tacky. This was slightly on tacky, but still "barely acceptable" territory.
I can smell a girl like that kilomters away: I knew chances were high she might have expected of being paid for.
AT THE RESTAURANT
Why would you go with her to a restaurant you might wonder. Well... I hadn't eaten yet and was starving.
So we pick one and we sit.
Her English is so poor I can't even understand her ethnic background.
She looks Asian, but also, somehow, very Russian to me. Indeed she speaks Russian. Then I seem to understand her mom is Mongolian.
She says she likes people from my country as they are gentleman. And I very much don't like that framing (later she would also say men from my country have many women, which is much better, even though those low level stereotypes don't help her build any value).
Anyway, we order pizza and salad to share.
A beer each, she barely drinks hers, she probably left more than 2/3 of it as "she just drinks veeeery little (why would you order it then, I think)
The food is also not enough for her, so she also orders another dish of pasta which I then also eat a bit.
PULL EFFORT
As the eating draws to an end I write on a translator we should go watch a movie, and she says she can't today but "next time".
Had we agreed to go back together I might have picked up the bill.
But the "next time" amped my resolve of not paying.
TIME TO PAY
She writes something like "sorry for me being late and thank you for this", implying she's been invited.
I say it's ok and write on the translator "let's go pay".
THE LITTLE SCENE
At the register, I tell the clerk to divide in a half and pay half of it by card. Then move slightly to the left to let her pay.
Oooops she's didn't see that coming.
She says she has no card. Many times.
I tell her I don't have enough money sometimes, some other times reply "but you got cash" or just say "come on" and pointing towards the register as to say "your turn".
This goes for a while and now two more couples stand behind us waiting to pay.
Nobody speaks: everyone is watching the scene.
I'm still not willing to pay though, and after a while tell the people behind me to move ahead with their own payment as I step to the side.
Some talking in the local language between the clerk and Freeloader, and both of them are telling me to hand the card.
I keep inviting freeloader to pay instead, wondering what the fuck are they trying to do: I've already made it clear I won't pay the whole thing.
The people behind are still completely silent, watching the scene as social pressure piles up on me.
After having blocked the line for a while I understand: the clerk needs the card to cancel my transaction, otherwise they can't process new payments.
I finally hand my card.
The clerk is unbelievably cold to me to say the least.
He's probably thinking I'm an asshole not inviting the girl? And that I'm a double asshole for letting her grill in that situation. And triple asshole for forming a line and still not just paying the thing?
Maybe.
The transaction is cancelled, the other couples pay, without anyone saying a single word.
Now it's back to us again.
And it seems like she really doesn't have cash or card.
She's nervously using her phone. Sometimes looking at me panicked as she utters "oh my God".
She repeats "oh my God" a few times, I'm actually feeling bad for her.
I'm checking online how much the whole amount would be in Euro: 52 Euros or so. Nothing crazy but nope, not willing to pay that.
I didn't wanna "punish" her or anything, far from it, I just didn't wanna pay for her.
Freeloader and the clerk keep talking to each other. Freeloader keeps nervously using the phone and calls someone.
The clerk leaves the station and goes downstairs.
I now ask to pay my half and pay cash. Not a thank you, not a nod of the head.
I'm thinking I'm done with my part anyway and I might just leave if this keeps going on for too long.
I've noticed it's really easy here to pay electronically, yet I don't know how, after a while freeloader finally manages to pay with her phone and/or by handing a few digits.
Maybe she called someone to get her card details? Not sure.
I open the door to leave, without turning towards her.
This interaction is gone, it makes no sense pretending we might still see each other or "it was nice with you".
Once we're outside, I slow down and she hurries past me. She even turns her head, very quickly and without specifically looking at me, and says "bye".
I know higher level of bitchiness would have never said bye. She wasn't thaaat bad after all.
Then she quite literally slinks away in the crowd with a super hurried pace, as if she wanted to go as far as possible, as soon as possible.
That must have been such a terribly embarrassing time for her.
Truth is, it was the same for me.
I thought coming out with no money at all was impolite of her, as was impolite to order another dish knowing she had no money.
Yet I felt very upset during the whole time, and even afterwards, I still kept feeling bad for her.
YOUR THOUGHTS
What are your thoughts?
Did I exaggerate?