- Joined
- Aug 6, 2022
- Messages
- 63
I was out with a friend last night and had an interaction where I got to practice 'sexual framing' in the style of Captain Jack (the PUA from Austin, Texas). I've had some good results from that in the past and I'm relearning it. For those of you who don't know me. I'm in a situation where I'm coming back to dating after a long hiatus. I'm like a noob with a past life of good experiences (although I was never at an elite level). Sometimes I'm robotic and struggle with basic small talk and banter other times I relaxed and flowing.
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What happened:
My friend opened two girls just as we were entering a pub, he has some good banter so was able to lock them in as we head to the bar. The following happened over the course of maybe 45 minutes. I locked in on the one I liked and unless mentioned everything was directed at her.
1. Basic introduction conversation, light banter, for example guessing their jobs.
2. Compliment my girl on her black leather jacket. I notice is she is wearing a sexy outfit underneath but I don't mention it.
3. We move to a table, I sit next to my girl, my friend next to his opposite us. She takes her jacket off and her outfit is really hot.
4. I ask her if she's good at keeping secrets. Then switch to another topic.
5. A minute or two later I tell a story about my friend who hooked up with a guy that turned out to be clingy. The aim of that story is to communicate that I'm not judgemental of my friend hooking up, disapprove of people not being able to keep secrets and don't understand why guys get clingy after sex.
6. Story about an office affair that I became aware of and how good it was that they were able to keep it a secret.
7. Asked if it's true that girls get sent a lot of D-pics? She says it does happen her friend chimes in about that.
8. I ask both of them how they know they can trust someone? They talk about slowly opening up to people over time.
9. At one point my friend and I head to the bar to get drinks with the intention to see if they will leave but they are still there when we come back.
10. I can't remember exactly when but I hold her hand for an extended time to make a point.
11. They leave to go to the toilet and then come back. My friend and I take this as a positive sign.
12. They want to go outside for a cigarette and ask us if we want to come outside. This is where my friend and I felt the energy shift. Now they were leading us.
13. My friend and I had been thinking about where to go next and they start talking about going to another venue. We know a place where there's a bit more of a party vibe where we can dance and isolate better. We walk ahead and they are somewhat lagging, just about keeping up. We feel that we have to lead strong and accept we might lose them.
14. As we walk down the street my girl bumps into som long lost guy friend who she hasn't seen in months who immediately latches on to us. When we arrive at the venue they show indifference and talk about going somewhere else. I haven't spoken to my target during this walk wanting to see if she reengages with me, but she doesn't.
15. We go our separate ways.
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I communicated all the frames I wanted to during the interaction but according to CJ's method I failed to show that I appreciated her sexuality. I had the opportunity to compliment her on her outfit, how hot she looked in it and how I appreciate how confident she must be to show herself off.
I don't think I'm ashamed to do that but I'm habituated to behaving indifferent about how women look that at this point I've probably gone too far and now come across asexual.
---
What happened:
My friend opened two girls just as we were entering a pub, he has some good banter so was able to lock them in as we head to the bar. The following happened over the course of maybe 45 minutes. I locked in on the one I liked and unless mentioned everything was directed at her.
1. Basic introduction conversation, light banter, for example guessing their jobs.
2. Compliment my girl on her black leather jacket. I notice is she is wearing a sexy outfit underneath but I don't mention it.
3. We move to a table, I sit next to my girl, my friend next to his opposite us. She takes her jacket off and her outfit is really hot.
4. I ask her if she's good at keeping secrets. Then switch to another topic.
5. A minute or two later I tell a story about my friend who hooked up with a guy that turned out to be clingy. The aim of that story is to communicate that I'm not judgemental of my friend hooking up, disapprove of people not being able to keep secrets and don't understand why guys get clingy after sex.
6. Story about an office affair that I became aware of and how good it was that they were able to keep it a secret.
7. Asked if it's true that girls get sent a lot of D-pics? She says it does happen her friend chimes in about that.
8. I ask both of them how they know they can trust someone? They talk about slowly opening up to people over time.
9. At one point my friend and I head to the bar to get drinks with the intention to see if they will leave but they are still there when we come back.
10. I can't remember exactly when but I hold her hand for an extended time to make a point.
11. They leave to go to the toilet and then come back. My friend and I take this as a positive sign.
12. They want to go outside for a cigarette and ask us if we want to come outside. This is where my friend and I felt the energy shift. Now they were leading us.
13. My friend and I had been thinking about where to go next and they start talking about going to another venue. We know a place where there's a bit more of a party vibe where we can dance and isolate better. We walk ahead and they are somewhat lagging, just about keeping up. We feel that we have to lead strong and accept we might lose them.
14. As we walk down the street my girl bumps into som long lost guy friend who she hasn't seen in months who immediately latches on to us. When we arrive at the venue they show indifference and talk about going somewhere else. I haven't spoken to my target during this walk wanting to see if she reengages with me, but she doesn't.
15. We go our separate ways.
----
I communicated all the frames I wanted to during the interaction but according to CJ's method I failed to show that I appreciated her sexuality. I had the opportunity to compliment her on her outfit, how hot she looked in it and how I appreciate how confident she must be to show herself off.
I don't think I'm ashamed to do that but I'm habituated to behaving indifferent about how women look that at this point I've probably gone too far and now come across asexual.
