FWB never cums, still can't get enough of me

Rakkum

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Some context:

I have had this FWB situation since late summer. Picked her up on my way to work on beautiful August morning.
Everything went smooth on the date up until last minute resistance when were back at my place and clothes started coming off. "I'm a good girl" thing. I could tell, though, that she was super horny and really wanted the sex. So I made a mental note to get better at creating connection and comfort.

Second date, smooth sailing. From hello to sex pretty fast.

Thing is, she never comes... She is one of these women who has a great appetite for sex and aren't too shy about (when they trust you), she is more alive in bed than many of the woman who've I've given an orgasm. As to sex, she seems to be very much into me.

My first question is: what gives?
Isn't the common wisdom here that for a woman to stick around, you need to make her cum? Well, she isn't, I'm sure.

My second question: any ideas why she is not getting orgasms as she seems to be otherwise super sensual and into sex?

Nipernaadi
 

DoWhatWorks

Space Monkey
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I’ve had FB’s tell me that as a girl it’s slightly different and they don’t have to have an orgasm in order to really enjoy the sex.

The mini-climaxes and sensations are intense and pleasurable enough for them.

In short As long as she keeps coming back I wouldn’t worry about it!
 

Chase

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Girls can be into sex with you but unable to orgasm. Usually if they have not learned vaginal/cervical orgasms yet. Sometimes even if they've not learned clitoral orgasms yet. They will still enjoy sex and can still attach to you quite a bit, even without orgasms.

Orgasms add a special something to the relationship though. It is nice to have them.

You can train girls to cum. If they're having a lot of sex with you but not cumming odds are they have fairly high (what researchers call) 'immature defenses' in their heads against orgasming. You have to work through that with them. Start with clitoral orgasms (if she's never had these before, get her a vibrator, then once she's learned to cum with that have her use her hands, then once she can cum that way, use your hands and/or mouth). Then do a lot of foreplay and get her cumming plenty before sex and then switch to penetration.

I spell it out a lot more here:


Chase
 

Rakkum

Space Monkey
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@Chase

Thanks, I eventually found my way exactly to that same article!

Since the advice on keeping a chick around is to give them great orgasms on the first date, then this doable on the first go, I assume. For an experienced guy.
 

Chase

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Great to hear it, Rakkum!

Since the advice on keeping a chick around is to give them great orgasms on the first date, then this doable on the first go, I assume. For an experienced guy.
Make her cum the first date if you can.

Not every girl is going to cum the first date though. A LOT of the orgasm depends on the woman.

If she's never orgasmed from penetration before and she's got a lot of defenses built up inside, you can be the smoothest, most seductive cat on Earth with A+ sex game, and she is not going to cum.

That's okay. If you can't make her cum, but everything else is great, and in any event if she is not used to cumming and does not expect to cum, it is not going to hurt you.

The more orgasmic she already is, however, the more she will tend to judge you by your performance.

I have had highly orgasmic women talk to me a lot about orgasms before / during / after sex. Some of them are very concerned with getting their orgasms (i.e., it is easy for them to cum... but not every guy can make them cum. And just because he makes them cum does not mean the orgasms will be very good). These are the women it is most important to make cum hard and for a decent length of time, and especially with your dick (not just hands or mouth).

For inexperienced girls who are not yet orgasmic, if they like you, they are going to like you, regardless of the lack of orgasms.

And unless they are orgasmically inexperienced girls who are completely free and open with their sexuality (i.e., just waiting for a guy to come along and give them sex good enough for the to orgasm with), they are not going to orgasm their first time in bed with you. They'll need some coaxing out of their shell, instead.

It very much depends upon the girl.

Chase
 

Rakkum

Space Monkey
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If she's never orgasmed from penetration before and she's got a lot of defenses built up inside, you can be the smoothest, most seductive cat on Earth with A+ sex game, and she is not going to cum.

That's okay. If you can't make her cum, but everything else is great, and in any event if she is not used to cumming and does not expect to cum, it is not going to hurt you.
Thanks for adding the nuance!

I had the joy of having a veeery orgamic woman recently. I was curious whether she had been like that always. No, she said. Only after meeting a guy who "opened" her... exactly as you wrote. Funny part, the guy was an ex priest!
 

Skills

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This happened to me dated a girl that was madly in love with me for a year, she never came...
 

punisher

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Happened with me once as well, her explaination was that she needs a lot of comfort with me first, after a week she could cum
 

Alaric

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To add to what I think was a great explanation by Chase. I would try to talk a little with her by the third time I have sex with a girl I always try to find out from her what she likes (If she doesn't know that's a great time to continue down that route) even if she came previously in our escapades its still very important to me that I do what's best for her, I've had all sorts of responses to this conversation but I don't think I've ever had a response that didn't improve my sex with her to some extent. Good communication is useful in relationships, in casual hookups, and in friends with benefits.
 
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