Gameboy's Journal

[gameboy]

If it's any consolation, this exact thing happened to me today as well. Was out trying to make some approaches, and a gorgeous girl comes and sits right beside me.. and my inner self-sabotaging monologue talked me out of talking to her! aaaagh! so annoyed with myself.... thankfully I did manage to get another approach in after that, but I wish I could master that internal trigger thing where I stop thinking and act!

Yes, it's really strange how our mind talks us out of doing what we actually want to do, and what is good for us!

This particular girl I saw today, okay she sat maybe 10-20m behind me. But at that time the beach was already pretty empty, and she could have sat down anywhere. May be an IOI or not, but who cares anyway? Better to approach than to go home unhappy... but today I did the latter.

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

Bummed out today. Saw at least 3 hot babes I could have approached, but failed.

I kept coming up with excuses like "Nah I'm hungry, gonna grab something to eat first", "Nah it's a 2-set, no chance this will work", and the last girl "No way, she's too young and pretty and probably just wants to read her book. Also no way she sat down right behind you on purpose."

God damn! If I go on like this I'll be going home alone until I die. Gotta get my act together. Never mind if I'm hungry, tired, or whatever. It's just a friendly chat with a cute girl after all. A girl! What is there to be afraid of?

But for some stupid reason I couldn't be bothered today all day.

I know that feeling all too well. Men of this forum! We must soldier on!

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: 2 pings today, no hooks

I was a bit busy with work and other stuff the last couple of days, so didn't approach much.

RECEIVED SOME IOIs ON BEACH BUT FAILED TO OPEN

There were two girls that gave me IOIs though that I didn't approach. Both were on the beach.

One girl I had noticed lying in the sun in a bikini. She had a nice suntanned body but was slightly chubby for my taste. Not un-doable, but not one of the girls I usually go for. As I left the beach, I walked close by her. We made eye contact and I smiled at her, and she sort of half-smiled back. Didn't open.

Girl 2 was a, hmm, I hate the term MILF... but she looked a bit older, in her 40s maybe. She sat down close by and looked over at me a lot. She had a good slim body actually, and nice long black hair. However, the beach was full of young hotties (all in 2-sets or groups though) that day so I wasn't really interested in opening this lady. Was grateful for the IOIs though.

TODAY: 2 ITALIANS

I put my towel down next to a topless smoking girl. She had a petite hot body. Soon, her friend came to join her, another topless girl with a possibly even hotter body. They were speaking Italian, and in their early 20s at most.

I walked down to the water, and when I came back I decided to say something to ping them. I said "Damn, it's hot" in their direction. They turned around to look at me, but at that very moment a male voice came out of one of their phones. They were talking to some guy on speaker phone so got distracted.

Later while I was casually checking them out, they made eye contact, then started talking in low voices and giggling. Both of them glanced over, but it felt to me it was more in a defensive way than an IOI. So I turned away for a while.

A bit later, I made eye contact with them a couple more times. This time it felt more neutral, or like they were actually enjoying my attention. But couldn't bring myself to open. FML. (Term I learned here, lol)

COMPLIMENTED A TATTOO GIRL

I walked around looking for other cute girls to open. Came across one that had a real nice body, but looked super young again. 20-ish I guess. I saw a bunny tattoo on her ass and said to her "Nice tattoo!", smiling down at her. She turned around expressionlessly at first, then smiled and said "thank you!" but turned back to her phone. So I kept walking as she didn't seem super interested.

INTERESTING GIRL SITTING ON WALL

I saw another girl I found kind of cute, she was a brunette petite one with jeans and black sneakers. But unfortunately she was quite difficult to approach. She was sitting on a high wall, had huge headphones on, and also defensive body language with her legs and arms crossed. I walked by her several times, she would actually look at me but with this defensive posture there was no way I was opening her from down where I was. Could have walked around the wall to be at her level of course, but then I'd have had to apporach her from behind.

BUMMED AGAIN

And again I walk home alone, without any meaningful interactions. Will I ever get my act together? At least I did a couple of pings today, one of them a direct compliment. So better than nothing but I still have looots of room to improve.

 

[ZenRising]

Hey there gameboy,

Keep on working at it my friend! Daytime cold opens in public places, particularly outdoors, is probably THE most difficult kind of approach to make.. I'm in much the same boat, in that I'm trying to overcome this approach anxiety in the hardest way possible(!)... you are and have been opening girls, and learning to deal with it when they refuse to engage....

Over the weekend I made a couple of approaches in cafe settings, but I know that the 'daygame' (I hate that term) approach is where I need to up my game... we'll get there...

 

[gameboy]

Pinged a 2-set on the beach today, but didn't get a reaction. Wrong language probably, I don't think they understood me.

My body language must be improving though: On my way home, I passed by a restauarant pushing the bike (no riding allowed in that street). There was a cute waitress standing outside the door, she seemed to be having an idle moment and was fixing her hair. i glanced at her through my sunglasses, smiling ever so slightly at her. She said "hi" to me of her own! All these exercises seem to be paying off in subtle ways

 

[ZenRising]

i glanced at her through my sunglasses, smiling ever so slightly at her. She said "hi" to me of her own!

Nice!

I'm also finding that, as I practice more, I'm just smiling at people on the street whenever our eyes meet.. it seems to be becoming automatic..

 

[gameboy]

Nice!

I'm also finding that, as I practice more, I'm just smiling at people on the street whenever our eyes meet.. it seems to be becoming automatic..

Yeah, it's a really nice side effect! Almost becomes subconscious. Like this girl was fixing her hair in a flirty and feminine way, not even directed at me I suppose. But I saw it, smiled automatically at her... and she responded

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: Missed AI at lunch. Failed "hi" ping on the beach

LUNCH: EYE FLIRT WITH TATTOOED BLONDIE

Had lunch at a restaurant. Two tables away there were two girls talking in Spanish. One of them had oll of her visible body covered in tattoos. Including her neck, hands, and she even had what looked like a little heart tattoo below one of her eyes. The other one didn't have a single tat I could see. Tattoo girl was a bleached blonde, the other one had beautiful long red hair. Both had similar faces and could have been sisters, except that the tattoo girl had lots of makeup on and a nose piercing, and the redhead had nothing. A beautiful view and an interesting contrast for sure!

I checked them out through my sunglasses while eating, and noticed the blonde one glancing over at me several times. I took off my sunglasses to let her see my eyes so she could see I was checking her out, and we did quite a bit of eye flirting over our respective lunches.

Unfortunately I didn't manage to talk to the girls in time. There was an empty table between us, so I'd have had to shout at them which would have been rude in a full restaurant. Or I could have gotten up and get closer to their table. But I didn't really think of that while I was eating... When a man is eating, he's eating, lol.

Anyway, the tattoo girl had way too many tattoos for my taste but it would have been fun to flirt with her regardless. The other girl was a bit cuter actually, but she didn't look over at me all that much.

Maybe I should have casually asked the blonde one for her instagram like the guy in that video someone posted here recently. I think that's really low-hanging fruit, because girls are happy to increase their follower count.

Anyway, I kind of thought I'd get a chance to talk to them when I finished eating, but they got up first and left. Saw they both had really big asses, but they were still attractive and both had good sense of style.

BEACH

Later on the beach, I came across only one single girl that I found attractive. I kind of stumbled on her and only realized she was good looking at the last second, so I just said "HI" as I walked by. She looked down at her phone. Probably a bad moment, and anyway the least effort opener possible. Maybe I'd have had better chances with something a bit more elaborate, but didn't come up with anything in the moment.

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: 1 direct compliment opener, got ignored

Strong wind today on the beach, and no approachable cuties found.

However, on my way back I spotted a girl with a belly-button piercing coming toward me with a female friend. So I said to her "Nice belly button you got there!"

She just kept walking. Her friend turned around though, looking at me out of the corner of her eye, half smiling. I smiled back at her, then went on my way.

 

[funkyjam]

Moving targets are hard.

 

[ZenRising]

Moving targets are hard.

Indeed they are... when I was into pick-up in my early 30s, I learned to just stop people... it has to be done respectfully of course, and you need to give them a reason to stop and talk to you.. I'd sort of wave them down, aiming to keep my body language open and calm, and always recognise that I was doing something a bit out of the ordinary - 'Sorry for interrupting you, I know this is a bit crazy, but I saw you pass and wanted to ask you something... blah blah blah...'... I was ballsy back then! It's been a long time since I've done the 'run and stop' (thanks to a very long LTR in the middle), but I'm aiming to get back there...

 

[gameboy]

Only saw one hot girl on the beach today, or so I thought... until I saw her face. She did look pretty cool from behind, but I didn't like her face much.

She gave me an unfriendly stare, so I guess the non-attraction was mutual. Didn't do anything with her.

 

[Gladiator]

Maybe I'd have had better chances with something a bit more elaborate, but didn't come up with anything in the moment.

If I can butt in.. Lot of girls don't know why you approached them. Some of them are just dumb to think you only wanted to say hi. So, just saying Hi is a low success opener, unless she's already hooked just by your fundamentals. That's only one aspect of it. In order to hook a girl, you need to go beyond an approach.. easiest is cold read or tease or accuse.

You're putting in effort to approach but wasting those approaches without following up. How about you approach for a hook instead for approaching?

In all of your sets, you say you liked something about the girl but you never seem to express that. I read about a couple of sets where you said "girl had great hair" or "great body" etc.. why don't you weave them in your approach instead of just saying hi?

You want her to hook based on what you liked about her and so you're approaching and not cos you wanted to approach. This serves 2 purposes: 1. It'll bring down pressure off of you to approach 2. You'll be congruent with your approach.

For ex: If you saw a red-head, your standard approach for hooking should look something like this:

GB: Hey / excuse me (pause.. until she gets your attention)
She: Hi
GB: Your hair.. damn! It's on fire (say it with passion)
She: Thanks

From what I see, your sets are ending here but you should continue... this is where you get her to hook (I'll give all 3 examples of tease/accuse/cold-read. Choose whatever suits your personality the best and use it)

Tease
GB: never stand near a traffic signal(comparing her red hair to traffic light), you'll cause a lot of accidents.. (with a smirk)
She: hahaha..
(If she still didn't hook and only laughed, you continue)
GB: now whenever I'm at a traffic signal, I think I'll remember your hair..
She: hahaha.. you're funny. What's your name?

Accuse
This is one level higher than tease but you need to be cocky to pull it off but the hook rate is higher compared to a tease

GB: Are you trying to distract guys at the traffic signal to cause accidents? Damn.. you're wicked!
She: Hahaha
GB: you remind me of the red lady from game of thrones.. she was wicked too but I'll forgive her cos she was sexy (notice the push/pull?)
She: you maybe right.. I'm wicked and dangerous ( generally if a girl is hooked, these are the kind of responses she'll give but it can be anything else.. point is, she's hooked)

Cold-read
This is more of a slow paced game relying on fundamentals heavily.. less emotionally charged.. but seducing her only with your eyes while talking something normal.. think of slow boiling a frog

GB: it makes me think you're someone who's very passionate in life
Her: oh.. why do you think so? (Hook)
GB: one for the color itself, cos red is fiery and passionate and secondly someone who dares to be different are generally passionate in life..

I hope next time you go out, you're stepping out your door not to approach but to hook a girl. Good luck dude

BTW, forgot to add.. if you're full of adrenaline and can't come up with follow up statements, have a few pointers in your back pocket.. Like:

Hair= comment on color
Dress= comment about elegance
Shoes= comment about elegance/personality
Bikini= comment on weather/fitness/health
Smile= comment on personality
Eyes= comment on warmth
Good body= comment on fitness/health etc (hope you get the idea)

 

[gameboy]

Thank you. You're absolutely right, I need to hook more. The thing is, I often have a hard time coming up with half decent openers on the spot, especially with moving sets when I only have a split second.

Thanks for helping me out! Going to re read your post a couple of times, hopefully something sticks to the subconscious

 

[gameboy]

TLDR: Awesome hook with a 2-set today, but ejected too early

Riding around on the bike, I came across this 2-set on the beach who I heard speaking my language. They were quite energetic, had some music with them, were singing / dancing while sitting down, and one of them (girl 1) was doing headstands and other acrobatics. The other one (girl 2) was rolling a large cigarette which I'm pretty sure was of the enhanced variety.

I rode around them 1 or 2 times, then stopped my bike in front of them when I was just a little bit past, and said in a loud voice but smiling: "Hello! Where are you guys from?"
Girl 1: "X country!"
Me: "Yeah I can hear that, but whereabouts?"
Girl 1 (City M)
Girl 2: And you?
Me: Originally from GBcity
Girl 2: ... but you live here?
Me: Yeah!
Girls: And how is life here?
Me: Awesome... as you can see! (spreading my arms out, presenting the scenery - it was a lovely sunset on the beach)

I found out how long they were staying (arrived two nights ago, staying for 5 more days). I always find this useful to have an idea of the general logistics. Then I started screwing up by asking about their hometown and what the wheather is like there. I also told them I'd been there once, for a music festival.

Girl 1: Oh, I'm sure it was a techno festival
Me: Not at all, it was metal
Girl 2: Oh cool!
Me: (a bit surprised at her reaction, I'm used to girls from my country hating metal) So are you guys rockers too?
Girl 2: Yeah I kind of like rock, but I once had a metal phase

At this point I wasn't sure how to continue. It felt counterproductive to keep talking about musical tastes. I told them "But hey you have good music here too". The girls nodded in agreement, but for some reason I decided to bail and said "Right, I gotta keep going. Nice to meet you!"

They were actually really receptive, and also quite attractive. I didn't get a super good look at them, but they might easily have been in the 9-10 range taking into account that one of them was doing all kinds of acrobatics, so must be really fit. (EDIT: I meant to say, I didn't get a good look at their bodies, but both were very beautiful face-wise.)

They looked like maybe mid to late 20s, a great age for a casual hookup in my opinion. I liked their vibe, they were quite down to earth. Both girls were friendly, but based on their responses, I got the impression that girl 2 might have actually been a bit interested in me.

Later when driving home, I realized that I don't have a process at all for 2-sets. If it had been a single girl, I'd have introduced myself, done the handclasp, then proceeded to banter a bit and try for touch, compliance, move her around and so on. But how do you do this with a 2-set? Can it even be done without a wingman?

In hindsight, I think what I could have done was this: Introduce myself, shake hands with both, then ask if I can sit with them for a moment to take a break from my bike tour. Sit next to girl 2 as she seemed to be the more interested one. Ask them about their plans / what they are doing here in my city, give some tips, and offer to guide them around or find some reason to exchange contact details.

Any thoughts?

 

[Casanova Newhouse]

TLDR: Awesome hook with a 2-set today, but ejected too early

Riding around on the bike, I came across this 2-set on the beach who I heard speaking my language. They were quite energetic, had some music with them, were singing / dancing while sitting down, and one of them (girl 1) was doing headstands and other acrobatics. The other one (girl 2) was rolling a large cigarette which I'm pretty sure was of the enhanced variety.

I rode around them 1 or 2 times, then stopped my bike in front of them when I was just a little bit past, and said in a loud voice but smiling: "Hello! Where are you guys from?"
Girl 1: "X country!"
Me: "Yeah I can hear that, but whereabouts?"
Girl 1 (City M)
Girl 2: And you?
Me: Originally from GBcity
Girl 2: ... but you live here?
Me: Yeah!
Girls: And how is life here?
Me: Awesome... as you can see! (spreading my arms out, presenting the scenery - it was a lovely sunset on the beach)

I found out how long they were staying (arrived two nights ago, staying for 5 more days). I always find this useful to have an idea of the general logistics. Then I started screwing up by asking about their hometown and what the wheather is like there. I also told them I'd been there once, for a music festival.

Girl 1: Oh, I'm sure it was a techno festival
Me: Not at all, it was metal
Girl 2: Oh cool!
Me: (a bit surprised at her reaction, I'm used to girls from my country hating metal) So are you guys rockers too?
Girl 2: Yeah I kind of like rock, but I once had a metal phase

At this point I wasn't sure how to continue. It felt counterproductive to keep talking about musical tastes. I told them "But hey you have good music here too". The girls nodded in agreement, but for some reason I decided to bail and said "Right, I gotta keep going. Nice to meet you!"

They were actually really receptive, and also quite attractive. I didn't get a super good look at them, but they might easily have been in the 9-10 range taking into account that one of them was doing all kinds of acrobatics, so must be really fit.

They looked like maybe mid to late 20s, a great age for a casual hookup in my opinion. I liked their vibe, they were quite down to earth. Both girls were friendly, but based on their responses, I got the impression that girl 2 might have actually been a bit interested in me.

Later when driving home, I realized that I don't have a process at all for 2-sets. If it had been a single girl, I'd have introduced myself, done the handclasp, then proceeded to banter a bit and try for touch, compliance, move her around and so on. But how do you do this with a 2-set? Can it even be done without a wingman?

In hindsight, I think what I could have done was this: Introduce myself, shake hands with both, then ask if I can sit with them for a moment to take a break from my bike tour. Sit next to girl 2 as she seemed to be the more interested one. Ask them about their plans / what they are doing here in my city, give some tips, and offer to guide them around or find some reason to exchange contact details.

Any thoughts?

Interesting conundrum how do you isolate from a two set? I think get them both out, then see how it plays. Maybe one of them will take the hint and say she’s going back to the hotel room for a nap or to call it a night.

 

[gameboy]

When girl 1 said "Probably a techno festival", I should have acted all offended and been like, "Whaaaat, do you think I look like a techno fan? OMG I can't believe it, you are so rude"

 

[gameboy]

Then turn to girl 2 and ask her, "Is she always like that?" Would have been hilarious, and probably would have cracked them up... Risky though... Oh well, hindsight is 20/20. Kicking myself right now, that girl (girl 2) looked really hot and seemed to be into me!

 

[DarkJedi]

Good job approaching the 2 set man. I know approaching a 2 set in DG can be intimidating. I mostly avoid it unless I feel like I'm on fire.

I can think of 2 things:

• Just be the fun guy, invite them both out to a bar or club later and feel it out
• Figure out who's more interested and qualify her. Both of them then know you're into her and you can slowly build out the rest of the seduction

 

[funkyjam]

Is there a music venue or a Hard Rock Café close by? Asking if they have been there, then inviting them to go would have been a congruent suggestion to make since you're talking about music.