Good Looking Guy And Problems With Closing/Retention On Date

[Alpha13SC]

I never do second dates now unless the girls reaches back out. Because 80% of my first dates end at my house. And in my experience, if I botched the escalation on the first date I rarely get a second chance unless it's their idea.

IMH, this is bad mindset. A lot of my girls, if we didn't fuck 1st time she came to my home, I contacted her again and went for it again. And we had sex.

Are you getting upset or something about them? What's your attitude towards her not wanting sex from the first time? How much time do you spent before coming to your place? Was there some sexual talking between you two before arriving? When they're at my home, I go for escalation + getting her aroused, not just having sex, if you can understand me. Focusing more on process. Then, depending on your verbals and how compliant she is, you two end up naked. This is how I view things.

I wouldn't be so radical as @think also. I think it depends on their age also.

Most of my 1st lay girls were to their home, not mine! What I do is date + getting to know eachother(here I actually like to find more about the other person) + escalation + getting things a little bit more sexual so they can portrait me as a their Lover + giving them a ride to their home + "hey, I want to piss. Can I come in for a few minutes?". Try this. They tend to be more comfortable in their home, in my exp. Regarding portreting as their Lover, I think it's a difference than just being just sexual. What I encountered is that they wanna have sex with you, but to be sure of you, resist 1st time. That doesn't mean she s putting in bf zone like that. Especially if you look good. I look good and they actually expect for me to talk to other girls. I don't even mention this.

For your home dates, are you arousing them too much? Maybe fractionate a little bit. Let them get used to the idea of you two having sex.

There's some articles on GS recently about advanced calibration. Those opened my eyes a little bit about past interactions.

Also, getting a question like "Why me?" What's your response? And how do you see this question from her? Because your attitude toward it may say more things.

 

[TomInHo]

IMH, this is bad mindset. A lot of my girls, if we didn't fuck 1st time she came to my home, I contacted her again and went for it again. And we had sex.

I'm starting to loosen up on that mindset. Got spoiled from doing a lot of fast pulls form night and online game

Are you getting upset or something about them? What's your attitude towards her not wanting sex from the first time? How much time do you spent before coming to your place?

Definitely not upset. If anything I may be too aloof.

I don't pursue them because I already have a few girls in rotation and have no problem getting first dates and can replace them very quickly. And I usually spend 1-2hrs on the date before bouncing back home

Regarding portreting as their Lover, I think it's a difference than just being just sexual. What I encountered is that they wanna have sex with you, but to be sure of you, resist 1st time. That doesn't mean she s putting in bf zone like that. Especially if you look good. I look good and they actually expect for me to talk to other girls. I don't even mention this.

I'm starting to notice this too. I definitely don't think they view me as a boyfriend or nice guy. If anything, it probably comes across like I'm just going to one night stand them while they want to make it a regular deal

I actually asked one of my girlfriends a few days ago about why we didn't have sex on the first date. And she said that even though she really wanted to, she wanted to make sure I would stick around

There's some articles on GS recently about advanced calibration. Those opened my eyes a little bit about past interactions.

Also, getting a question like "Why me?" What's your response? And how do you see this question from her? Because your attitude toward it may say more things.

At the time I didn't know how to respond to "Why me?". But I now I think she asked that because she needed some reassurance. She needed to know that I genuinely liked her and didn't view her as just another notch on the bedpost

 

[Alpha13SC]

I'm starting to loosen up on that mindset. Got spoiled from doing a lot of fast pulls form night and online game



Definitely not upset. If anything I may be too aloof.

I don't pursue them because I already have a few girls in rotation and have no problem getting first dates and can replace them very quickly. And I usually spend 1-2hrs on the date before bouncing back home



I'm starting to notice this too. I definitely don't think they view me as a boyfriend or nice guy. If anything, it probably comes across like I'm just going to one night stand them while they want to make it a regular deal

I actually asked one of my girlfriends a few days ago about why we didn't have sex on the first date. And she said that even though she really wanted to, she wanted to make sure I would stick around



At the time I didn't know how to respond to "Why me?". But I now I think she asked that because she needed some reassurance. She needed to know that I genuinely liked her and didn't view her as just another notch on the bedpost

1-2h it's not much IMH. I usually go with 4-5h sometimes, before getting to one's home. Focusing more on her emotions/comfort. Sometimes I even ask her "how do you feel with me?", maybe some cementing emotions. Just to see what works, and how can I build from there.

The guys before me got actually some very good advices. Gonna implement them also. I want to try 3-bounce date also.

What I'm trying also to do and it seems to work is deep diving, going for close kiss as soon as possible, making some things sexual, then fractioning, so they can have the idea of two of us. And when we're at her place, or mine, some arousal along with more intimacy moves from me are already done.

Also, having some anti-player tech also is good. Along with the sexual prizing. And some unusual comments towards to her feminity.

Have you been in a ltr? After mine ended, I feel like I don't project as much fuckboi vibe as before, tho I can be. And this is somehow beneficial. Because I can relate to them more.

 

[TomInHo]

Have you been in a ltr? After mine ended, I feel like I don't project as much fuckboi vibe as before, tho I can be. And this is somehow beneficial. Because I can relate to them more.

I've only been in one monogamous LTR my entire life. Lasted 3 years

But I have always done ONS, MLTRs and FBs

Guess I just give off strong fuckboi vibes, because even in my monogamous LTR, she was constantly doubtful of my fidelity even though I stayed faithful in the relationship.

I can't help it. But after finding this community I realize this is sticking point I need to work on to cultivate deeper, happier relationships and more efficient dates

 

[D. Gately]

I agree with the earlier poster who said displaying some vulnerability may help and also make her more invested in you.