FR HBRussian mentions boyfriend early on, should I have kept going regardless?

[gameboy]

Yesterday I approached a cute girl on the beach that seemed to be happy to talk to me. She was blonde, slim, and had a cute face. Looked like she was in her twenties. She was casually dressed in jeans and a pullover, not dressed to impress. Her behaviour was warm, friendly, a bit submissive which I liked.

I approached her saying Hi how's it going, she smiled and was receptive so I sat next to her and chatted a bit. I found out she lived in my native country, but was originally from Russia. She spoke my language very well so conversation was easy. I asked her how long she was staying, and she said well I'm only staying in this location until tomorrow, and then I'm going to X city nearby.

I said oh "that's a city full of rich people, maybe you'll meet someone there" to probe if she was receptive to hooking up. She said "Actually my boyfriend's family has a house there". Which kind of killed my momentum. I kept chatting with her a bit longer, but then said goodbye to approach other girls.

I didn't find any other receptive girls that day though. (At least, none that I managed to approach.) So now I'm wondering if I should have kept trying to seduce HBRussian?

I don't want her to regret anything she does with me though. So my idea is going direct: "Oh you have a boyfriend? That's a pity. I approached you because I thought you're cute" and then see how she reacts. Maybe she say's she's in an open relationship, or maybe she's cheated on him before or whatever. In which case I wouldn't have a moral issue with ploughing on. Gotta make sure the boyfriend isn't going to show up unexpectedly of course... I assume I could probe for that by asking "So you got any your plans for tonight?" and if the bf was in town she would surely mention him.

What would you have done? Thoughts?

 

[reeax]

My GF is Russian, I spend time in Russian circles in Europe (mostly in France), I speak Russian pretty well, I even have an appt in St-Petersburg .. So let me tell you that Russian girls don't fuck around (at least 25+, i don't know for younger girls). All of them are extremely serious and devoted to their guys / husbands. I never saw that mentality in other European nationalities, and I have dated girls from a lot of countries. Most are married, because it is a very important thing culturally. It's not in Russian culture to date in parallel, they'll simply ditch their guy if unhappy and move on to the next guy. I never heard a single one speaking about open relationships, I don't think that kind of shit exists in their mental space (I speak about real Russian girls, born and raised there).

So if she really had a boyfriend, your chances were extremely slim. But approach seems valid for other nationalities

 

[Conquistador]

^^

Even rainbow-flag-waving fuck-Putin-chanting Russians are far and away the most conservative Europeans you will ever meet. They might be larping as trashy Euro hoes to give the middle finger to The Man but usually those ones still have stable boyfriends and stuff. It can induce cognitive dissonance. Same for the much smaller percentage of single girls in the 18-21 bracket.

You have marginally better chances with married Russian women (if they’re unhappy and stuck) than ones with “just” boyfriends. Because the ones with boyfriends are almost always quite happy with their relationship, otherwise they’d break up. The USSR was liberalizing and normalizing divorce before that was cool. So anyone in a relationship has little excuse to cheat or otherwise behave badly.

As fat as other nationalities, I feel going direct would actually polarize too much and reduce your chances further.

Basically…cross-culturally “boyfriend” means a lot of different things.

One last note: Ukrainians seem to vary more, some are more like Polish chicks but others act more Russian/post-Soviet in terms of the hardcore relationship frame

 

[reeax]

Wow @Surveyor impressive knowledge of Russian culture and ex-soviet countries .. I really like how you put that in words, that's pretty much what I think also

 

[gameboy]

Thanks for your replies! But as this girl is now gone for good, I'm not so much focussed on Russian girls as on girls in general. I think it would have been smarter to keep chatting with her a bit longer, and find out more. Especially as the girl was fun and the interaction was pleasant.