How To Be A Man and Lead Women Confidently

[King]

Hey all,

My question here is, sometimes in field I get nervous and start choking up especially around hotter women, and of course being a nervous wreck just makes it harder to confidently lead women. How can one overcome this and be a confident man and lead women without hesitation like a fucking badass and take responsibility for everything.

Tips and tricks are appreciated and even techniques/drills to practice!

Thanks in advance

 

[POB]

Just say to yourself: "It's ok to be nervous".
(Don't fight it, don't ignore it, just acknowledge and move on.)

If you are in field and it happens, politely excuse yourself, go to a quiet corner, and say it out loud if you can (if you can't, repeat in your head).
Use this technique untill you calm down and get back to your normal thoughts, then resume what you were doing.

 

[King]

Just say to yourself: "It's ok to be nervous".
(Don't fight it, don't ignore it, just acknowledge and move on.)

If you are in field and it happens, politely excuse yourself, go to a quiet corner, and say it out loud if you can (if you can't, repeat in your head).
Use this technique untill you calm down and get back to your normal thoughts, then resume what you were doing.

Thats an awesome tip, thank you so much for replying. Its like addressing the problem and being aware of it and addressing it head on kind of like mindfulness. Don't run away from it address it and deal with/ handle it.

So to go a bit further what would say about if lets say in field the girl is nervous/shy/anxious, maybe she's like that or you made her that way whatever the case may be. One thing I noticed is when I do notice a girl all shy and anxious sometimes it transfers onto me and I get all nervous or anxious. How to handle this?

 

[Zoro]

Part of this comes from not having solid inner clarity.

Who are you? What do you stand for? What are you trying to do with life? What do you want from women?

To lead you have to know where you’re going. That starts with you.

 

[POB]

Thats an awesome tip, thank you so much for replying. Its like addressing the problem and being aware of it and addressing it head on kind of like mindfulness. Don't run away from it address it and deal with/ handle it.

Exactly!

So to go a bit further what would say about if lets say in field the girl is nervous/shy/anxious, maybe she's like that or you made her that way whatever the case may be. One thing I noticed is when I do notice a girl all shy and anxious sometimes it transfers onto me and I get all nervous or anxious. How to handle this?

Apply the same technique to her.
Just ask:
"Look, do I make you feel nervous when I'm talking to you?"
Yes, a little bit..
"No problem, I'm a little nervous myself. I think it's ok to feel nervous...after all we still don't know each other that well...but I know we can change it real quick if we keep this vibe going!".

P.S. you can even joke about going online to talk to her:
"Should I DM you on IG instead?"

 

[King]

Exactly!

Apply the same technique to her.
Just ask:
"Look, do I make you feel nervous when I'm talking to you?"
Yes, a little bit..
"No problem, I'm a little nervous myself. I think it's ok to feel nervous...after all we still don't know each other that well...but I know we can change it real quick if we keep this vibe going!".

P.S. you can even joke about going online to talk to her:
"Should I DM you on IG instead?"

Awesome, thanks for the reply, I like how you phrased it to get her comfortable. Now a follow-up question to this exact thing is what if I don't address it with her and instead demonstrate a trait or start a specific kind of convo or relate / build comfort to get her less nervous and become comfortable, I feel that this in itself is kind of a dhv in that you read how she felt and you changed the situation and her mood displaying high social skills and making you come off more smooth and attractive.

 

[King]

Part of this comes from not having solid inner clarity.

Who are you? What do you stand for? What are you trying to do with life? What do you want from women?

To lead you have to know where you’re going. That starts with you.

Yes I highly agree! Men have to be confident and go for what they want and make things happen, this is the ultimate show of confidence.

What you said is very true as I've been connecting with my inner self a lot last few days and realized I needed to connect with myself on a much deeper level. This being on your path and having that inner clarity is extremely important in being true to one self and being congruent with ones behaviors.

Thanks for the reply, this got me thinking very deeply.

 

[POB]

Now a follow-up question to this exact thing is what if I don't address it with her and instead demonstrate a trait or start a specific kind of convo or relate / build comfort to get her less nervous and become comfortable, I feel that this in itself is kind of a dhv in that you read how she felt and you changed the situation and her mood displaying high social skills and making you come off more smooth and attractive.

Can't quite follow you on this one...
When you acknowledge her nervousness about being approached by a random dude, and lead her to a more relaxed state, aren't you being masculine and demontrating good social skills, leadership and high value? Heck, these days, the act of approaching alone shows you have cojones and already sets you apart from the pack.

 

[King]

Can't quite follow you on this one...
When you acknowledge her nervousness about being approached by a random dude, and lead her to a more relaxed state, aren't you being masculine and demontrating good social skills, leadership and high value? Heck, these days, the act of approaching alone shows you have cojones and already sets you apart from the pack.

Yeah sure I understand what you're saying. I'll explain what I meant. So essentially you said:

Apply the same technique to her.
Just ask:
"Look, do I make you feel nervous when I'm talking to you?"
Yes, a little bit..
"No problem, I'm a little nervous myself. I think it's ok to feel nervous...after all we still don't know each other that well...but I know we can change it real quick if we keep this vibe going!".
P.S. you can even joke about going online to talk to her:
"Should I DM you on IG instead?"

What I'm asking is what if I don't use this technique. And instead:

demonstrate a trait or start a specific kind of convo or relate / build comfort to get her less nervous and become comfortable, I feel that this in itself is kind of a dhv in that you read how she felt and you changed the situation and her mood displaying high social skills and making you come off more smooth and attractive.

So instead using your technique and asking if she's nervous and tell her I'm nervous too. Like just avoid the whole we're nervous talk in general. I wanted to know if I could do something else to instead improve her mood and smoothen out the situation in a different way? Any other techniques or methods you know?

Thanks again for all the help

 

[MuST0BtA1NSkR1Lla]

Hey all,

My question here is, sometimes in field I get nervous and start choking up especially around hotter women, and of course being a nervous wreck just makes it harder to confidently lead women. How can one overcome this and be a confident man and lead women without hesitation like a fucking badass and take responsibility for everything.

Tips and tricks are appreciated and even techniques/drills to practice!

Thanks in advance

Rubber band on the wrist and start snapping it when you start to tunnel vision.

 

[POB]

So instead using your technique and asking if she's nervous and tell her I'm nervous too. Like just avoid the whole we're nervous talk in general. I wanted to know if I could do something else to instead improve her mood and smoothen out the situation in a different way? Any other techniques or methods you know?

Ok, I get it.
You can use general humour and flip the script (shift the attention to you, instead of her):
"Stop being so cute, you are making me blush...Damn it, I'm a shy boy after all"

You can use self-deprecating humour:
"I know I have big hands, but it's false propaganda...(point down and make fake sad face)"
(check her reaction)
"Nah, just kidding, I'm a monster...like Sully from Monsters. Inc"

Then you transition to curiosity:
"On a serious note, you seem cool, I really like your energy...you know what made me come talk to you in the first place?"
(now you qualify her a bit, so she can relax being the focal point again)
"I like how you matched that outfit to your earrings, it really shows a lot about your feminine side and personality."
(ler her talk about herself)

Then you transition to sexual prizing and gambits

"It's funny, because yesterday I was reading about this amazing dynamic women have when they meet a new guy.
Like they are just there chilling, and out of nowhere a guy comes and do this (insert shitty guy behavior).
Never quite understood that, why guys behave that way when they see a woman they like...does that happen to you a lot?"

 

[Derek da man]

This is an awesome threat so far, so thought I'd add my bit.

It's not often that I talk to a girl that I haven't seen or been looking at across a room or whatever beforehand, for at least a few minutes anyway.

When I'm watching her body language I can see the insecurities in her, how she looks questioningly at other people, how unsure and insecure she is. Remember that women often cover their insecurities by dressing really well and/or showing cleavage/legs/etc. They also show "flesh" particularly around the neck line but also the tummy which is programmed into them by mother nature when they are looking for attention from males. Once you start watching more closely and analyzing their body langauge and actions you can see they are just "little girls wanting attention and want to be loved".

When you start to see them as being so much less secure than you are then you stop putting them on a pedestal or thinking that you aren't good enough for them. In actual fact you can quickly get to the realization that you have a lot of manly traits that she is looking for and that most other guys simply aren't offering her what she wants.

Once you change your perception things become a whole lot easier and smoother as you're not nervous and actually you have a quiet air of confidence. As a bonus you suddenly you find you're not tripping over your words any more.

(credit to @POB for the "little girls that want to be loved" analogy in previous posts)

 

[King]

This is an awesome threat so far, so thought I'd add my bit.

It's not often that I talk to a girl that I haven't seen or been looking at across a room or whatever beforehand, for at least a few minutes anyway.

When I'm watching her body language I can see the insecurities in her, how she looks questioningly at other people, how unsure and insecure she is. Remember that women often cover their insecurities by dressing really well and/or showing cleavage/legs/etc. They also show "flesh" particularly around the neck line but also the tummy which is programmed into them by mother nature when they are looking for attention from males. Once you start watching more closely and analyzing their body langauge and actions you can see they are just "little girls wanting attention and want to be loved".

When you start to see them as being so much less secure than you are then you stop putting them on a pedestal or thinking that you aren't good enough for them. In actual fact you can quickly get to the realization that you have a lot of manly traits that she is looking for and that most other guys simply aren't offering her what she wants.

Once you change your perception things become a whole lot easier and smoother as you're not nervous and actually you have a quiet air of confidence. As a bonus you suddenly you find you're not tripping over your words any more.

(credit to @POB for the "little girls that want to be loved" analogy in previous posts)

My goodness what an amazing reply! fucking legend. This is the reply I was looking for. Its something I had been thinking about recently myself. Thank you so much for your reply, this is the solid inner game response I was looking for. Appreciate you!