How to keep your sanity while learning seduction? (soft question)

strictlyincreasing

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Oct 24, 2017
Messages
67
Hi guys. This is a soft/open ended question. Do you think that a guy can realistically keep a sense of morality, values and overall mental health while learning seduction? How?

For me I'm in the beginners hell phase of seduction. I've had 30+ online date FUs and now I'm learning daygame. In daygame I've done less than 10 approaches but almost all have been harsh, painful rejections. The point is that each rejection hurts a lot and affects me. The times that I felt lowest were after some women that I liked rejected me. The indirect and polite rejections can sometimes be the worst. I'm in the game to get married and have children and I know that I will be a better man with a woman in my life. I'll be better with my family, my friends and myself. I'll work better and everything because there will be a whole amount of positivity around me. So I'm working towards a good outcome.

I know that it's going to be around 100 approaches until my first number close, around 200 more until my first non flake number and probably over 1000 approaches until I have an actual girlfriend. So there are potentially thousands of rejections coming and they will probably hurt. I am wondering what kind of person I will have become after those approaches. There are many guys who have done well in game and are all the better for it. Many examples are to be found here on GC. But there are many guys who get a massive ego and are completely disagreeable to others at this point. Some even need therapy. We even see examples on this very board about guys in beginners hell - further along than myself - who are showing signs of negativity and anger e.g. using derogatory or hateful words to describe women who they actually want to date. Well, isn't game all about giving and sharing love (whatever "love" means to you) and if you want to date somebody, don't you fundamentally like them and not feel hate towards them, despite their annoying habits? Clearly something has been lost within these negative souls and I don't want the same thing to happen to me. At the same time, I don't want my mental health to suffer terribly through the 100+ rejections that are on the way. It's easy to tell somebody to go find a new woman to approach and it is in fact easy to do that, but rejection hurts, plain and simple and for me at the moment, it looks like there is no way around that. What effect will it have on a guy in beginners hell and how can he avoid the negative consequences, and only take the positive learning that is guaranteed to come with every new approach? Thanks.
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
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You can lessen the learning curve by becoming better at relating to people as friends. Male or Female. What this does is give you some Outcome independence because you have people who care about you and if you ARE rejected by some woman who doesn't even KNOW you, then it is her problem, not yours....

What happens, when you have a social circle that includes men and women, is that often women will introduce you to their friends and you automatically have some credibility as a potential suitor. Referred to as Social Proof.

Gotta walk before you run...
 

Mr.Rob

Modern Human
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You really think you're that hard of a case it will take a 100 approaches to get a number?

You keep your sanity because only every once in a while is a horrible experience. 90% of the time its either fun, neutral, or maybe slightly uncomfortable.

strictlyincreasing said:
So there are potentially thousands of rejections coming and they will probably hurt.
I was a pretty hard case when I first got into game and I definitely wasn't getting "thousands of rejections" (and it took me a year and 1/2 to successfully turn numbers into dates).

Dude you should just take a bootcamp with GirlsChase and get a running head start to skip all that pain of banging your heard against the wall and enduring "1000's of rejections". If you approached 10 girls and got 10 harsh rejections your obviously doing something wrong. Work with a pro and get things working for you bro.
 

strictlyincreasing

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 24, 2017
Messages
67
Fuck This said:
You can lessen the learning curve by becoming better at relating to people as friends. Male or Female. What this does is give you some Outcome independence because you have people who care about you and if you ARE rejected by some woman who doesn't even KNOW you, then it is her problem, not yours....

What happens, when you have a social circle that includes men and women, is that often women will introduce you to their friends and you automatically have some credibility as a potential suitor. Referred to as Social Proof.

Gotta walk before you run...
I've made some new friends but I haven't been induced into any social circles yet. These are nice friends who are happy to see me and even hang out with me. But it seems to me that social circles of the kind that we're thinking about cease to be a thing for some people beyond college. But friends are not women. Like I said, I'm in the game to get married and have children. Obviously a friend can't do that. Money, success, learning, health etc. can't do that. The point is that I don't have the outcome independence that you're describing and I think that what I just put there is the reason why. Finally, the "it is her problem, not yours" is the wrong mindset. The first approach I ever did, she didn't stop and had a scared look on her face while I tried to stop her. I went back to the person who I was with and said angrily (possibly more colorful language) "what in the world is wrong with her? I would have had a great conversation with her." I was quickly told by the person I was with that this was the wrong idea and that I should not have any anger or annoyance when things like this happen. Since then, I have started to internalize the idea that anything that goes wrong is my fault. Any feedback I get from an approach is exactly that - feedback on me. So I never want to blame the woman and say "it is her problem, not mine." To me, game is about taking responsibility.

Mr.Rob said:
You really think you're that hard of a case it will take a 100 approaches to get a number?

You keep your sanity because only every once in a while is a horrible experience. 90% of the time its either fun, neutral, or maybe slightly uncomfortable.

strictlyincreasing said:
So there are potentially thousands of rejections coming and they will probably hurt.
I was a pretty hard case when I first got into game and I definitely wasn't getting "thousands of rejections" (and it took me a year and 1/2 to successfully turn numbers into dates).

Dude you should just take a bootcamp with GirlsChase and get a running head start to skip all that pain of banging your heard against the wall and enduring "1000's of rejections". If you approached 10 girls and got 10 harsh rejections your obviously doing something wrong. Work with a pro and get things working for you bro.
Believe me. I have had some time with a person like that. This person told me that I have all the tools to go out and learn all this stuff on my own. He cured my approach anxiety in less than 1 hour so he is no slouch. Pros can only direct you; they can't go and do the approach for you. It's you who is approaching with your fundamentals, your background etc. So yes I'm totally expecting 1000s of rejections. But you're making a fair point that harsh harsh ones are rare.
 

Space

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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strictlyincreasing-

Great question! Actually I've opened up a topic with a similar sentiment in mind. At least be sure to watch the video until 3:30!

Personally speaking how do I keep my sanity? It's relatively easy for me, since I'm a slow learner to begin with. Feeding my brain with too much seduction stuff would simply make it explode, so I don't do it. Otherwise I have bigger concerns in life than seduction now so I try to concentrate on those. I try to. But it's summer.
 

Sub-Zero

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Sep 6, 2014
Messages
754
Stumbled upon your thread. I see you say that you have seen members talk bad about women and call them mean names,
wonder who that could be? :)

I feel I’m the only one that does that on here, and it does come off bad, but that’s how I handle all things that make me angry.

It could be sports, video games, anything that makes me mad really. That’s how I communicate my frustration.

And I also say mean things about girls I have slept with as well, especially if I felt they have done me wrong.

It’s more of a stress reliever for me.

To keep your sanity you can’t take women seriously at all tbh, I know I should take my own advice, but that’s the only way how.

I’m going to try to start not degrading women like that anymore, and to take them way less serious.
 

naturalmikey

Cro-Magnon Man
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Jun 9, 2019
Messages
815
dude just wait. you’re in for a ride. it’s gonna shake your belief system. get off the high horse though. you don’t have to know what you want. enjoy the ride.

i discovered rsd watching brandon carter and minobody videos back in 2016. in maybe august of that year i made my first approach. a really hot 23 year old at the mall. the mall has a little train for children that drives through it. i ended up fingering her on that train.

as for the girlfriend marriage stuff. i’ve been married and have kids. the kids are the only good thing to come of it. i got into a marriage with the woman i did due to limited options. i’d never dated enough to know what i like. now i do. i recently got out of a year long relationship with an amazing woman. she was only 22 and clearly not an age to settle down. but damn man. i’m 37 and got to spend a year with a model tier 22 year old. something that had never happened in my life. i’m so grateful for that. so grateful for my experiences. don’t sell yourself short. let yourself live. give up on puritan ideals and see what happens. will i get married again? maybe. i’d like to have companionship later i life. but i see no reason for a man to get married before his fifties.
 

Sub-Zero

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
754
naturalmikey said:
dude just wait. you’re in for a ride. it’s gonna shake your belief system. get off the high horse though. you don’t have to know what you want. enjoy the ride.

i discovered rsd watching brandon carter and minobody videos back in 2016. in maybe august of that year i made my first approach. a really hot 23 year old at the mall. the mall has a little train for children that drives through it. i ended up fingering her on that train.

as for the girlfriend marriage stuff. i’ve been married and have kids. the kids are the only good thing to come of it. i got into a marriage with the woman i did due to limited options. i’d never dated enough to know what i like. now i do. i recently got out of a year long relationship with an amazing woman. she was only 22 and clearly not an age to settle down. but damn man. i’m 37 and got to spend a year with a model tier 22 year old. something that had never happened in my life. i’m so grateful for that. so grateful for my experiences. don’t sell yourself short. let yourself live. give up on puritan ideals and see what happens. will i get married again? maybe. i’d like to have companionship later i life. but i see no reason for a man to get married before his fifties.


What did you change about yourself after you discovered rsd? Did you just happen to talk to more women or did something drastically change?

What age you think a man should have kids?
 

naturalmikey

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
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Messages
815
have kids when you can afford them and have a woman that you know you can get along with the rest of your life

i was 34 when i found rsd. i watched the blueprint prior to approaching. the blueprint is amazing. tyler is kinda like david dango, not the best game but knows his shit.

anyway i knew one person was always reacting to the other, make eye contact, escalate. i was just at a point where i had no other options. i was coming out of a marriage and didn’t know what else to do. i remember telling myself if i don’t make the move she’s not going to. i was scared and did it anyway. honestly that’s not true at this point. a lot of the time i don’t make a move to bait her into making one. but you have to have really good sub comms to do that.
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Messages
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strictlyincreasing said:
[
I've made some new friends but I haven't been induced into any social circles yet. These are nice friends who are happy to see me and even hang out with me. But it seems to me that social circles of the kind that we're thinking about cease to be a thing for some people beyond college. But friends are not women. Like I said, I'm in the game to get married and have children. Obviously a friend can't do that. Money, success, learning, health etc. can't do that. The point is that I don't have the outcome independence that you're describing and I think that what I just put there is the reason why. Finally, the "it is her problem, not yours" is the wrong mindset. The first approach I ever did, she didn't stop and had a scared look on her face while I tried to stop her. I went back to the person who I was with and said angrily (possibly more colorful language) "what in the world is wrong with her? I would have had a great conversation with her." I was quickly told by the person I was with that this was the wrong idea and that I should not have any anger or annoyance when things like this happen. Since then, I have started to internalize the idea that anything that goes wrong is my fault. Any feedback I get from an approach is exactly that - feedback on me. So I never want to blame the woman and say "it is her problem, not mine." To me, game is about taking responsibility.
SI: I've been rejected plenty bud.... If you internalize all of them you will go crazy. It just takes one woman who sees your value to change that. AAAAND if you are looking for Wife material...Friendship is not a bad place to start.

I was married 20 years before I had to put myself out there again. But in those 20 years i learned how to generate a connection with people, male and female alike. When that opportunity to close the deal came along I was amazed at how receptive women were. I'm going to say there was a 5 year period of "married but looking" where I learned to recognize interest back and gauging reactions to my innuendo's, actions and flirts. All this despite being rejected by the woman who swore to love me "until death do us part"...

My thought is to dial down the "game" and just find a connection with people male and female alike. When you make that connection and see the interest in another persons eyes it is powerful.
 

naturalmikey

Cro-Magnon Man
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Messages
815
OP i suggest you read the rational male. it appears you forgot to take the red pill
 
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