How to prevent and cure burning out due to large number of approaches

Blackheart

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 20, 2020
Messages
36
Due to large number of approaches without success, I am so burned out and tired of approaching, so I don’t have mood to talk with any girl. Some advices on what to do would help me. Should I take a break and how long? Today I should go to approach girls in shopping mall, but stayed home because I am demotivated.

I live in one small country. Women here on social networks, forums, crave that they want to be approached but in real life they only want to meet men thorough social circle or some “natural” situations like social events, neighborhood etc., and while cold approach is what I mostly do. So I try to make my cold approaches to be ”socially acceptable” and ”natural”.

In most cases when you cold approach these girls, they are so closed off, awkward and uninterested for conversation, so it is very hard to impossible to reach hook up point, no matter how good are your fundamentals, vibe and game. I approached about 300 women since the October of last year, including parks, bus stops, shopping malls and bookstores. Results were next:

On bus stops: I open them with situational opener; they answer and return to their phones. Then I again say something, they answer again and return to their phones or looking at something else. An so on... When there are just of two of us on bus stops sometimes they will be more interesting for conversation although this is not the rule. From the 150 girls I opened, I reached hook up point 4-5 times. From that, two girls were super cute and maybe super similar to me so they couldn’t ignore me, one was curious but then in conversation she decided that doesn’t like me and ignored me and the rest of two were just friendly.
In parks: I opened 100 girls and reach up hook up point with 20 girls. The only time I reached hook up point was in situations when my approach was ”natural”. Like when they were standing near some exercise equipment (horizontal bar, etc.), so I use situational opener like “hey I see you are practicing alone, do I disturb you If I join” etc., then give some compliment about her shape and skills, and transit to personal conversation. But even then, when they practice, a lot of times will not talk with me, giving me just one word answers. Also, couple of times, I reached hook up point when she was sitting on bench (alone or with one friend) and I sit near her pretending to be tired, waiting for someone, and situationally opened . But many of girls are just walks or sits in groups and talk, so there is not “natural” way to meet them. Even If you open them somehow they will return to their conversation. I got a few instant dates in parks (with 3 girls and one MILF) and one friend zoned classic date with also one MILF.
In bookstores and shopping malls: I opened 50 girls with questions about books, near stores or to give me some recommendations, etc. She does it, but then she returns to her business. Or even if I sometimes transmit to personal conversation she is uncomfortable or I see that she is pulling back from conversation.
Based on different tech I used: I concluded what is mutual for all these places, i.e. how girls act:
  • They respond to situational openers but then return to their business.
  • Different tactics that lead to hook up point like:
  • Smiling then transition to small talk then personal conversation
  • Smiling then storytelling then personal conversation
  • Smiling then cold reads then personal conversation
often don’t give results because they really don’t want to participate in small talk or to tell me anything personal about them.
I don’t know how much fact that I am not native in this country affects my success. My accent is strange and I know that some women don’t like men from my country. It happened to me many times, that girl lost all her interest since the time I opened my mouth. Also, my fundamentals represent me as a quality man who is hard working, ambitious, kind and generous, while the most of the girls here are opposite of that, so maybe it harms similarity and they don’t want to meet me.
 
Last edited:

Blackheart

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 20, 2020
Messages
36
So, I fell "so tired" like Ben Kingsley's character in this movie.
Any advice about how to overcome disapointment, beat luck of enthusiasm, and continue to approach women are welcome.
 
Last edited:

Velasco

Modern Human
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
791
Also, my fundamentals represent me as a quality man who is hard working, ambitious, kind and generous, while the most of the girls here are opposite of that, so maybe it harms similarity and they don’t want to meet me.
There ya go. Dress similar to the way the men, these girls you like tend to go for, for social acceptability frame.

As for conversation, I recommend you give this article a quick read:


Specifically the part on "set-up questions".
 

DarkKnight

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Oct 18, 2018
Messages
699
I had this happen in somewhere in 2019... What I did was taking time off as Peter mentions... or maybe just relocate to sniper game for the time beeing.

 

Blackheart

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 20, 2020
Messages
36
Yes, I am going to do both things. Some time of rest and then use sniper game. I am familiar with that concept and these days I actively think if I only use it. Thing is in that where I live now, girls are rarely cold approached so they do not send approach invitations, so it is hard to separate receptive from unreceptive girls. Still, I was thinking, that I can use sniper game, on the way that only approach to girls that are my type. Even if she is not interested she may be intriqued so there will still be good interaction. Anyway, I will rest and try to approach less but more effective. I can't do this anymore, i.e. doing massive cold approach in area where most girls don't want to meet men on that way.
 

Blackheart

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 20, 2020
Messages
36
Yes, you are probably right. I am little bit depressed due to large number of going nowhere approaches, so overreact.
 
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