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How to read this situation? She's making me wait or what?

A

Anonymous

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Me [26 M] with my crush [25 F] 1.5 months; we've only been "dating" for 2 weeks, but I CANNOT read what she feels!!

(BTW, I might be in love with her...? I've never been as happy since I met her...?)

So, here a brief synopsis:


There's this girl - I've known here for about a month and a half. We've only been going on dates for a few week, both of which I initiated. We are one year apart but we met in class --- she was my professor. I went to her office hours a bunch and we had good conversations. I asked to her coffee, and she said she could but only after class ended (school protocol.)


The first date was about an hour in duration and took place at a coffee shop. The conversation was good, and we made each other laugh and smile a lot. All signs were a go. I said I wanted to see here again and she told me she could in a couple weeks after a conference she had to go to.
Okay, so, I call her after that conference and, due to a comment about ping-pong she made at coffee, I took her to a restaurant with a ping-pong table. She was...strangely quiet...in the car, and for the rest of the night, for that matter. We had fun playing ping-pong, but dinner was enormously quiet. I almost felt like I was interviewing her because I had to initiate pretty much all the conversation. After dinner, however, we went for a drink in a close-by bar, and she opened up a little, but not much. She really didn't seem interested in me at all! She asked a question about me occasionally, but I feel like she just didn't have that much interest in finding out about me.


At the end of the night, when I dropped her off at her place, I was super nervous because I didn't know how to interpret the date, so, I asked her, I kid you not, "Did you have a good time?" Ugh. She said yes, lol, but then I asked her if I could see her again.


Here's the thing, she said "Yes, maybe next Monday," a week away, "or after the end of the month when I have less going on at work."
To me, this sounded like she was putting me off, i.e. letting me down easy. However, I texted her the next day to send her a link and tell her that I had a fun time with her last night. She said thanks for sharing the link, and " Me too, had a lot of fun yesterday : )" WTF? So, I said have a good night, and I'll call you tomorrow, and she replied, "You too! Have a good night : )" WTF? Another f!@#ing smily face? What the hell does that mean?
So, I call her the next day (today), and she answers with an extremely soft, timid, and almost [frightened?] tone. Again, super quiet, but I just asked how her day was, and she said she was busy with work and all that. I told her I wanted to go dancing with her on Monday, and she said she couldn't Monday, but she could at the end of the month when she finished all her work stuff. I mean, she laughed a couple times on the phone from jokes I made, but her tone really threw me off!


What is going on here? Is she into me or not? I am really very into her, but I won't pursue her if she is trying to send me signals to stop, you know? I just can't tell... I mean, is she putting me off with all this work stuff or what? Maybe she's a workaholic, which is very possible (she's defending her thesis proposal at the end of the month), but I just need some outside perspective!

Also, do I text her again? I really want to text or call her, but I don't know if that is a "smart" thing to do. People have told me "the ball is in her court," but I don't want her to stop thinking about me.


Thanks in advance, y'all.


TL;DR: She is putting off going out with me but still seems interested in going out with me; her tone, at times, is timid and scared, and she doesn't seem interested in me during conversations. What's the deal?
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

SaltyT

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 6, 2014
Messages
30
point-n-click said:
Me [26 M] with my crush [25 F] 1.5 months; we've only been "dating" for 2 weeks, but I CANNOT read what she feels!!

(BTW, I might be in love with her...? I've never been as happy since I met her...?)

So, here a brief synopsis:


There's this girl - I've known here for about a month and a half. We've only been going on dates for a few week, both of which I initiated. We are one year apart but we met in class --- she was my professor. I went to her office hours a bunch and we had good conversations. I asked to her coffee, and she said she could but only after class ended (school protocol.)


The first date was about an hour in duration and took place at a coffee shop. The conversation was good, and we made each other laugh and smile a lot. All signs were a go. I said I wanted to see here again and she told me she could in a couple weeks after a conference she had to go to.
Okay, so, I call her after that conference and, due to a comment about ping-pong she made at coffee, I took her to a restaurant with a ping-pong table. She was...strangely quiet...in the car, and for the rest of the night, for that matter. We had fun playing ping-pong, but dinner was enormously quiet. I almost felt like I was interviewing her because I had to initiate pretty much all the conversation. After dinner, however, we went for a drink in a close-by bar, and she opened up a little, but not much. She really didn't seem interested in me at all! She asked a question about me occasionally, but I feel like she just didn't have that much interest in finding out about me.


At the end of the night, when I dropped her off at her place, I was super nervous because I didn't know how to interpret the date, so, I asked her, I kid you not, "Did you have a good time?" Ugh. She said yes, lol, but then I asked her if I could see her again.


Here's the thing, she said "Yes, maybe next Monday," a week away, "or after the end of the month when I have less going on at work."
To me, this sounded like she was putting me off, i.e. letting me down easy. However, I texted her the next day to send her a link and tell her that I had a fun time with her last night. She said thanks for sharing the link, and " Me too, had a lot of fun yesterday : )" WTF? So, I said have a good night, and I'll call you tomorrow, and she replied, "You too! Have a good night : )" WTF? Another f!@#ing smily face? What the hell does that mean?
So, I call her the next day (today), and she answers with an extremely soft, timid, and almost [frightened?] tone. Again, super quiet, but I just asked how her day was, and she said she was busy with work and all that. I told her I wanted to go dancing with her on Monday, and she said she couldn't Monday, but she could at the end of the month when she finished all her work stuff. I mean, she laughed a couple times on the phone from jokes I made, but her tone really threw me off!


What is going on here? Is she into me or not? I am really very into her, but I won't pursue her if she is trying to send me signals to stop, you know? I just can't tell... I mean, is she putting me off with all this work stuff or what? Maybe she's a workaholic, which is very possible (she's defending her thesis proposal at the end of the month), but I just need some outside perspective!

Also, do I text her again? I really want to text or call her, but I don't know if that is a "smart" thing to do. People have told me "the ball is in her court," but I don't want her to stop thinking about me.


Thanks in advance, y'all.


TL;DR: She is putting off going out with me but still seems interested in going out with me; her tone, at times, is timid and scared, and she doesn't seem interested in me during conversations. What's the deal?

I recall reading an article that changed the way i see woman.. It was about moving fast with woman..

Seems like she's dating someone else, and the other guy maybe have alredy slept with her (just speculating), and she's putting you on a waiting list because she sees you with a Boyfriend Material...

I'd recommend move on to a new girl or making her jealous with an other girl in you classroom, but not too much, work on fundamentals and try to make her invest in you...

Search for some info about that, i'd really help you...

One question You didn't bring her to your place after the first meeting? what exactly happened next?
 
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