FR+ Kissed in her in front of her building after night game pull attempt

[Ronnie]

I am in a night bar with two friends.

I am standing and with the tail of my eyes I notice these two girls sitting at one of those tables with high chairs looking at me.
I noticed a poster drawing of a woman on the wall and I go with an observational opener: "Do you girls know if that's some famous person? It kinda looks familiar".

They're pretty receptive from the get-go. We start chatting about different topics, from music to travel. One girl is particularly cute and looks like the actress Natalie Portman. I tell her but I do a bit of a push pull and also tell her she also looks like a girl I was always fighting with in school. I have started to do this push-pull thing with girls who are particularly pretty because I know how many direct compliments they get from guys.

Her friend is cool. She doesn't cockblock me at all and when the girl I am targeting goes to the toilet she also tells me that before I approached them her friend was kinda intrigued by me. We drink, smoke, chat. At one point I invite "Natalie Portman" to dance. We dance around 5-6 minutes but we get quite physical (no kiss at this stage though).

At this point my two friends have already gone to another bar.

We go back to the bar. After getting physical I chill a bit a talk a bit more with her friend to avoid overvalidating Natalie Portman. Then I shift the attention back to her. After overall 2 hours with these two girls, we all get out of the bar. The friend lives closeby so she walks home. I tell Natalie Portman "it's cold let's get a cab, it'll drop you at your place first and then it'll drop me at mine". She agrees. We keep talking while waiting for the cab and at the cab. Once we get to her street, I tell her "I am getting out too, I can actually take the bus from here".

I walk her in front of her building. I kiss her. She is quite responsive. Then I tell her: "Do you mind if I use your toilet? I don't wanna do it on the street". She says "Looks to me like you are trying to sneak in. Everybody in this city does it on the street". I am not really into fighting the last minute resistance. Because we had exchanged numbers before and already hinting at getting a drink another day, I kiss her again, mention that I'll see her soon and walk away".

I'd like to hear to things from you guys:

1) Is there something else I could have done to aim for a smooth pull?
2) What's a good next-day text? In her building she said she was happy it was late and nobody was watching because the old ladies in her building are quite gossipy.

 

[gameboy]

I'd have offered her to come to your place instead of dropping her off at hers. Apparently she wants to avoid being gossipped about by her neighbours.

 

[Ambiance]

You gave up at the last 5% of the seduction unfortunately. You had her alone and fairly primed for intimacy, and ejected at the first sign of resistance. Making matters worse, you unveiled your intent by kissing her not once but twice, and the second kiss effectively came as a reward for her resistance. This hurts your chances of laying this girl, let alone getting her out for drinks again.

In a situation like this where you are finding indirect, seemingly harmless ways of leading the interaction to her bedroom (faux-innocent "let's grab a cab together", "Oh I don't actually need a cab now that I am at your place", "I need to use your restroom"), you need to stick to your frame, even if you know she sees right through it, and even if she knows you know she sees right through it. You can give her a knowing smirk or something as you continue to peddle your bullshit for coming upstairs with her (ie "Ha! You're funny. I'm not going to the bathroom in the street. C'mon, show me upstairs real quick, I reaaally need to go." *take her hand and start walking into the building, assuming the sale*).

I also would have held off on kissing her until in her apartment (or perhaps in the elevator, maybe kiss her mid-sentence and be all over her for a second before breaking it off like nothing even happened and resuming conversation. This both eases her potential concerns that you won't make a move while also teasing her).

Once in the apartment, you both know why you are there, so make a move. You can hold off on doing this and keep up the charade of just being there for the toilet or whatever to build tension/tease her, but she should suspect you are just playing with her and you should not do this too long.

Anyway, I hope this was helpful. As far as continuing to try to lay this girl, I'd probably try getting into a casual conversation with her over text/the phone, and slowly turning it sexual. Gradually get into sexting with her, then on a high note invite her directly to your place. You don't want to go back to a bar or to a coffee shop as this is backwards momentum from getting to her place last time (and gives off boyfriendy vibes). And don't go to her place unless she offers, since you have a negative precedent established there by letting her token resistance trump your intent.

 

[Ronnie]

You gave up at the last 5% of the seduction unfortunately. You had her alone and fairly primed for intimacy, and ejected at the first sign of resistance. Making matters worse, you unveiled your intent by kissing her not once but twice, and the second kiss effectively came as a reward for her resistance. This hurts your chances of laying this girl, let alone getting her out for drinks again.

In a situation like this where you are finding indirect, seemingly harmless ways of leading the interaction to her bedroom (faux-innocent "let's grab a cab together", "Oh I don't actually need a cab now that I am at your place", "I need to use your restroom"), you need to stick to your frame, even if you know she sees right through it, and even if she knows you know she sees right through it. You can give her a knowing smirk or something as you continue to peddle your bullshit for coming upstairs with her (ie "Ha! You're funny. I'm not going to the bathroom in the street. C'mon, show me upstairs real quick, I reaaally need to go." *take her hand and start walking into the building, assuming the sale*).

I also would have held off on kissing her until in her apartment (or perhaps in the elevator, maybe kiss her mid-sentence and be all over her for a second before breaking it off like nothing even happened and resuming conversation. This both eases her potential concerns that you won't make a move while also teasing her).

Once in the apartment, you both know why you are there, so make a move. You can hold off on doing this and keep up the charade of just being there for the toilet or whatever to build tension/tease her, but she should suspect you are just playing with her and you should not do this too long.

Anyway, I hope this was helpful. As far as continuing to try to lay this girl, I'd probably try getting into a casual conversation with her over text/the phone, and slowly turning it sexual. Gradually get into sexting with her, then on a high note invite her directly to your place. You don't want to go back to a bar or to a coffee shop as this is backwards momentum from getting to her place last time (and gives off boyfriendy vibes). And don't go to her place unless she offers, since you have a negative precedent established there by letting her token resistance trump your intent.

Ok so I f**ked up

It's so hard for me to be a bull$hitter right before going up to my/her place. Usually I get laid when the resistance is very low to zero. It still unreal for me to think that some guys can overcome major resistance in front of their building or hers, before going upstairs. I'll have to learn somehow.

 

[Ambiance]

It's all good every guy on here that gets results has had probably dozens of fuck ups like this. It sucks, but it's how you learn.

I wouldn't call what she said after you kissed her major resistance. It was very likely token resistance, ie her putting up a barrier because that is "what's expected of her as a lady". Had you tried to come up after she said that and she still resisted, then that might have required a performance from you. But I think all this girl needed from you was you to take charge.

The indirect way you went about getting her out of there and going to her place has its merits, but jsyk also invites more resistance late into the courtship because she is unsure what you want and feels things are going from cold to hot too fast. I'd recommend either sticking to indirect but doing so in a way that is subtly obvious you are leading her to being alone with you (like my example for responding to her resistance), or if that is too nuanced for you, be more direct/sexual with your pulls. Both methods get her more comfortable with the notion of getting sexual with you going into the pull.

 

[Ronnie]

As far as continuing to try to lay this girl, I'd probably try getting into a casual conversation with her over text/the phone, and slowly turning it sexual. Gradually get into sexting with her, then on a high note invite her directly to your place. You don't want to go back to a bar or to a coffee shop as this is backwards momentum from getting to her place last time (and gives off boyfriendy vibes).

Little update: I did text her. I tried getting into a casual conversation. She responded the first 3 times (Sunday) by she didn't reply my 4th text on Monday morning. She didn't even read it on Whatsapp (feels like she archived the conversation).

I didn't text her again. My experience so far is that when they stop replying so early, and then you keep texting, you just get desperate without improving your results. What's your take on this, guys?

The other question of course is if she didn't reply because I didn't insist when trying to pull that night or if she didn't like me enough in the first place. Guess I'll never know.

 

[Gladiator]

Little update: I did text her. I tried getting into a casual conversation. She responded the first 3 times (Sunday) by she didn't reply my 4th text on Monday morning. She didn't even read it on Whatsapp (feels like she archived the conversation).

I didn't text her again. My experience so far is that when they stop replying so early, and then you keep texting, you just get desperate without improving your results. What's your take on this, guys?

If I escalated and failed, I normally don't text. But there are exceptions when there was some wild card that caused her to bail etc. In your case, it was a botched escalation. So, there was no point in texting her. It's just "buyer's remorse"on her part.

The other question of course is if she didn't reply because I didn't insist when trying to pull that night or if she didn't like me enough in the first place. Guess I'll never know.

A chic would never think that she didn't cooperate and so you didn't lay. She'll just think that you were not confident to seduce her. She might not think this logically but that's how she justifies to herself. That's the reason, most guys here insist to lay on the first date. I'd constantly fractionate escalation to see if the lay is there, if I sense it's not there, I'll back off and try on second date. You did everything right, just that you gave up in the end. We all do. It just comes with practice to discern when to go ahead and when to give up.